6 Deans + a Dog

Sometimes as a parent it can be so hard to sit back and watch your kids figure out who they are and where they belong with their friends. I have watched my kids as they call or text a friend and they can’t hang out but they find out later that they were together with another group of friends. I have seen at recess some friends say, “Go find someone else to play with today.” I think the hardest thing for me is that when our child gets their feelings hurt it brings back the same feelings that I had when I was young. I want to share a story that happened to me when I was in the 6^th grade and I think it really changed me.

I had a group of about 6 girlfriends in elementary. We stuck together and we really didn’t care about anyone else or their feelings. Yep you could say I was in a clique. Well I was really bossy…I know hard to believe =) and one day my group of friends decided to turn on me and not want anything to do with me. They got sick of me wanting to always be in charge. They would run away from me at recess and say and do really mean things. I am pretty sure I deserved some of it, but they went a little too far in the way they treated me. I had a hard time at school for about 5 days of them being really, really mean. I mean they would wait for me in the hall and just say things that were so mean. I refused to go to school and I stayed home for about a week. I still remember my 6^th grade teacher Mrs. Williams coming to my house with some earrings and saying she missed me and that I needed to come back and try to make new friends and try to get over what these friends had done. It was hard, but I did it. When I came back they apologized and said they were sorry, but the damage was done. I really never was as close to them as I used to be and I learned that nobody likes to be bossed around and I needed to have a lot of friends and not be exclusive.

I am so grateful for my family and the friends I have in my life. I know I couldn’t go through this PARENTING thing without them. I want my kids to know that I too had to figure out which friends were good for me and that it is important to always be who you are and not change for ANYONE.