The Adseros: May 2009

I just sent an email to someone and thought that the date on it looked very familiar. May 13th...hmmmm. I kept thinking that it was someones birthday, or something important happened on that day. After a moment's pondering, I realized that it was Lincoln's due date. I'd been saying that date over and over and counting down to that date for nine months. Now, it's just another day on the calendar. Lincoln's already been here for nearly 3 weeks. It's hard to imagine still being pregnant right now. No thank you!

I've been meaning to write about the events leading up to his birth and my early impressions of him, but have been a little preoccupied the last little while. So here it goes:

On April 22nd, I went in for a routine OB check up. I was close to 37 weeks along and was looking forward to seeing if I was dilated at all. I was fairly certain I was cause I had been having contractions. I was hoping that the end was near, but was mentally prepared to go beyond the due date. Matt always thought the baby was going to be early, and I always thought it was going to be late. I think more than really thinking he was going to be late, I was just preparing myself for the worst. Anyway, the nurse took my vitals in preparation for the appointment. My blood pressure was sky high. It had been relatively high each time I went in. I think the real reason it was high is cause I'm always running late and so I have to race to get there and then doctors in general make me nervous. Regardless of the reason, my doctor was keeping close tabs on my blood pressure. The nurse made my lie down for 5 minutes and then retook my blood pressure. The second time around, it was fine, but the doctor began to tell me that because it was so high initially, I was going to have to be on bed rest for the next week. Bed rest!!!??? I was not a happy camper. I hate not being active! After giving me the bad news, he then proceeded to check if I was dilated. He told me that I was dilated to 1 cm. That made me happy. When he checked me, he put a lot of pressure in there which is normal, but then afterwards, I felt a trickle of urine leak out of me. I was totally humiliated and informed the doctor that I had just urinated. He looked at me and asked if I felt that I had to go. No, of course not, I had just gone to the bathroom for a urine sample. He looked at the fluid and said, "Actually, I think I may have broken your water". At that point I wasn't really sure what that meant. I was in denial and thought he was wrong and that I had, in fact, urinated. He collected some of the fluid in order to run some tests and told me that if it was amniotic fluid, that he'd meet me over at Labor and Delivery across the street at the hospital. WHAT???? Labor and Delivery? I was NOT ready for that. He told me to remain laying down while he did the tests to prevent any more leakage. As I laid there waiting for the verdict, my mind was racing. What else had I not done that needed to get done before the baby arrived? We had a car seat...check. We had a Pack n Play....check. The house was pretty clean....check. I had washed all his baby clothes...check. I had wanted to vacuum out the car, send my thank you notes, go grocery shopping, pre-register at the hospital etc etc. All those things were important, but not necessary. I guess I was ready to have the baby. But then I realized that Matt was on a field trip for a training course that day. He had taken a bus with everyone else, so getting back in a flash would be a challenge. My heart welled up with anxiety, excitement, and fear all at once. Tears came to my eyes and dripped back towards my ears since I was laying on the table. I wiped them away, and tried to regain composure before the doctor returned.

After a few moments more of going through checklists and wishing I had my phone in hand, a nurse came in and told me that they couldn't get any conclusive results and so they were going to send me to Labor and Delivery for observation. If I didn't go into labor by myself in the next 12 hours then they'd induce me. I stared blankly at her and said, "What?". My mind couldn't process what she was saying. She smiled and said, "OK, you're having a baby. Go to Labor and Delivery, check in and the doctor will meet you over there". I slowly put my clothes back on. As I walked out of the office, the secretaries yelled after me, "Do you need to schedule another appointment". Nope...sure didn't. I was having a baby!!!! I walked slowly to my car still in disbelief. I called Matt, no answer. So I left a message. "Hello. This is your wife. We're having a baby". Then I called my dad. No answer. My mom, no answer. My friend Bri, no answer. Finally, I called Julia, and she answered. I was glad to let someone know what was going on. My phone beeped "low battery". I managed to talk to my dad and Matt's mom before my phone died. I didn't have my charger, so there was no way I could get a hold of anyone. My anxiety level started to rise again.

I checked in at around 12 or 12:30. They gave me a little gown. I changed my clothes and then I just sat on the bed still feeling like I really shouldn't be there, and that it was all a joke. I had lost my insurance card (that I have since found). Luckily, that day I wrote down my account and group number from the info at my Dr's office, so I had that. The nurse came in and put the contraction and baby heartbeat monitors around my belly. Reality started to sink in again, and I began to panic a little. The nurse told me that my doctor had told her that I was from Utah. So was she! I asked where she grew up and she said on the East bench of SLC. So did my mom! Turns out, they went to high school together. The nurse had actually married a guy from high school that my mom had asked to a girl's choice dance. I really don't think that it was a coincidence that the nurse was from Utah. Having that little connection with her put my heart at ease. I felt like I had a family member there, even though really, I was all alone and had felt very alone. A little tender mercy from Heavenly Father. The nurse really felt like my mom, and I was so glad to have her there.

Several hours passed. I was bored out of my mind and kinda scared. I had no phone, and no idea where Matt was. My friend Bri had got my message and called the hospital to find me. It was such a relief that someone knew I was in the hospital. I'm so grateful for her! My nurse let me use her cell phone. I called Matt again, but no answer. Matt finally called back around 4 pm. He was on his way!!! Thank goodness! He stopped by to see what I needed and then rushed home to take Lucy to the kennel before 5 pm and pack up some stuff for us (good thing we only live 5 minutes from the hospital). Poor Lucy had been locked up in her kennel all day at home, and then she had to go be locked up again at the vet while we were at the hospital. Poor girl.

The waiting game continued. At least I had someone to talk to and be bored with now. Gratefully Bri came to break up the monotony with bags and bags of treats. Unfortunately I wasn't allowed to eat them at that point just in case I was going to go into labor. I was having contractions but couldn't feel any of them. The doctor came in again around 6 or so to see if I had progressed any. Sure hadn't. It was so annoying to be in the bed. I had watched "Baby Story" a million times and they always got to walk around the hospital room/hallways. I wish I could have but since my water had broken, I had to stay put and not move around too much in my bed cause then the monitors would lose the heartbeat and the nurse would have to come in and readjust the monitor. My hair became one big dread lock from turning my head from side to side on the bed trying to get comfortable. It was such a relief (in more ways than one) to take a bathroom break and stretch out my legs. The doctor said that I could eat something light for dinner and then I'd be given a sleeping pill. Thank goodness, cause I really don't think I could have fallen asleep on my own. Matt went and got me a Subway sandwich at around 7 pm. I scarfed it down cause I hadn't eaten anything since 9 am. Yum! They gave me the sleeping pill at 10 pm and then next thing I knew it was 4 am. I had a "Good Morning Enema" and then they started me on Pitocin at 5 am. The nurse checked at 5 am to see if I had dilated any more. Nope. Still a 1. By 9 am, I had been having heavy contractions for quite some time. My nurse came in and asked if I wanted her to check and see if I was dilated enough to get an epidural yet. I said no, cause I would be totally discouraged if it wasn't time yet. She said she'd come back in an hour to check me. I managed to make it through another hour of heavy contractions that were only a minute or two apart. I thought that surely, by 10 am I'd be dilated to at least a 3 and able to get an epidural. My nurse checked me and gave me the bad news. I was still only at a 1. How in the world after 5 hours of contractions could I not have dilated at all? I was so ticked and discouraged. The nurse had me get off the bed and sit in a chair so that gravity could help things along. She told me to "ride the wave" and relax through the contractions. How in the world to you relax with that kind of pain? I did my best to "ride the wave" and breathe. Matt said "Good job" and rubbed my shoulders a little. I told him that I'd appreciate it if he wouldn't talk to me or touch me. "Well, what do you want me to do?" he said. "Just sit there, please." I said. I could sense that he was rolling his eyes but was too exhausted to care or look. I rode the waves for another hour. I thought I was going to vomit on several occasions and made Matt run go get the garbage can from the bathroom. I managed to keep it down. My nurse came in again at 11 am to check me. Yup... still a 1. She moved me back onto the bed, and we decided that some narcotics were in order. She put some of that good stuff in my IV and seconds later I was on Cloud 9 and having a very difficult time keeping my eyes open. Drugs are a wonder! I don't know how people do it naturally. I'm told that Pitocin makes things get really intense a whole lot faster so it's a little more difficult to endure. I hope that's true and that I'm not a total wimp. I knew I wasn't He-woman to begin with, so whatever, I guess.

For the next hour, I was somewhere between asleep and awake. Apparently I was saying all sorts of crazy things. I do recall saying to Matt, "Look at Lucy!!", and he said, "What?". I realized I was dreaming that Lucy was there and that she had sawdust all over her face. Not sure why she'd have sawdust on her face. Matt said I kept telling him I was going to throw up and to go get the garbage can. After getting the garbage can several times and then returning to find me asleep, he stopped believing things I'd say. I would moan like a crazy woman every time a contraction came, but wasn't really conscious of what I was doing. Out of nowhere, my mind was very alert. I had a hard time moving my mouth and expressing myself, but I said, "Matt, go get the nurse. I have to push." By that point, Matt wasn't believing a word out of my mouth. I could tell he wasn't so I gave him the code word. Matt, when he is sleeping will have full on conversations with me and not remember a thing the next morning. In order to determine if he is awake or not, I'll ask him when my birthday is. This is a difficult task for him when he's awake so if he's sleeping, he for sure won't get it right. Anyway, I said, "Matt, your birthday is 4-9-19**. Go get the nurse!". He knew I meant business so he went and got her. She checked me and I was only at a 4 but she knew that if I was feeling the need to push, the end was near. She hurried and got the anesthesiologist to give me an epidural. I was so tipsy, I couldn't even sit up on my own to get the epidural. My face was buried in the nurse's chest as she did all she could to keep my upright. They made Matt leave the room while they gave me the epidural. Matt admitted to me later that he got teary eyed as he stood outside the door, cause it was happening so fast and I was being really crazy. It was just a little emotionally overwhelming.

Moments after the epidural, I was dilated to an 8 and just moments after that, it was go-time. My first push was really weak sauce. I wasn't sure how to do it, but I soon figured it out. I think I only pushed a total of 10 times. It was funny to watch Matt's face. I could tell when he could see the baby cause his eyebrows raised and he said, "Go, go, go!!". It was exciting! The doctor barely got there in time for my last push. Lincoln's head popped out pretty easily, all things considered. I didn't get an episiotomy. His head made it through without tearing me up. The doctor told me to push one more time for the shoulders. The doctor didn't say how hard so I gave it my all and both his shoulders popped out at the same time and tore me in all different directions. Not cool. I could feel even with the epidural that it was not going to feel good down there for quite some time. As the doctor went to sew me up, I still had a lot of sensation down there. So the anesthesiologist came in and gave me more drugs to numb me. My legs got really warm and heavy, and soon I couldn't feel a thing from my chest down. In order to transfer me to the postpartum room after I had been sewed up, they had to roll me from one bed to another cause I couldn't move at all. There's a lot more to tell about postpartum recovery. It is not very pretty, so I'll spare you those details. On a more pleasant note:

Lincoln Arthur Adsero was born at 1:20 pm on April 23rd. He was 7 lb and 20 inches long. He had big ridges on his head from the plates on his head being squeezed together. He has no eyebrows and little tiny blond eyelashes. He looks like he'll be a blondy. He has lots of peach fuzz on his ears and sideburns. He would only open his right eye at first. I was worried that we had a Quasimodo baby cause his left eye looked smaller than the right and it would never open. His body is so skinny. His skin, especially on his elbows and knees looked way too big for his body. He is a little piggy and is hungry all the time so his skin is already starting to fill out. His lips look very full. He maybe has my mom's lips. He has a lot of veins on his head. Matt and I joked that his hair looks like Grandpa Adsero's cause there's not much on top, and a little on the sides and in the back.

Even though I said to Matt just the other day (after Lincoln didn't fall asleep until 4:30 am) that if he were a pet, I'd give him back, we are so glad he's here. He adds such a sweet element to our lives. Our family feels more like a family. Instead of feeling like there's a Mecham and an Adsero family living under the same roof, we feel more united and complete with him here. Although I'd been dreading labor and deliver for quite some time, and it really wasn't a lovely experience, I think I'll do it again...probably several times. We'll see.