Wednesday, July 29, 2009

i'm gonna pretend.

i'm good at pretending, aren't i? i'm good at lying, deception, concealing the truth, dodging questions and most importantly, lying by omission.

i've had a lot of practise. i'm sure there would be other people contending for my spot in actress of the century. who cares if you can act on screen when reality is you're a liar. to your friends. to those you care about.

i'm gonna pretend there's nothing wrong.

i'm gonna pretend that i don't believe i screwed up two friendships. again.

i'm gonna pretend that i don't believe that this time i might have lost more than 2.

i'm gonna pretend that everything is fine.

i'm gonna pretend because i can't take reality anymore. not now.

i'm gonna pretend because the truth hurts. it's cliche, but it hurts.

i'm gonna pretend because even in my state of pretense, it hurts.

but the truth hurts more.

i'm sick of pretending. it's a cowardly escape. but it is still my line of defense.

i refuse to breakdown and crumble.

i refuse to show my vulnerablility.

i will not place myself in a disadvantageous position.

Posted by Ce at 8:45 am

Thursday, July 23, 2009

ok i havent been here in ages. duh. missed 2 entire months. almost 3. so lets see...

year 1s have come in, made many many new friends, yadah yadah yadah, got shitty grades for my mid-sem tests, although 3 weeks have passed since school started, i havent been to a single business law tutorial class beacuse 1st week i ponned, 2nd week ruth sick so cancelled, and 3rd week ruth got family matter so cancelled. again. so basically my classmates have known their blaw marks for 3 weeks and im still guessing. heh.

Cost Accounting: 51
Financial Accounting: 63
Fundamentals of Finance: 74
Taxation Project: 94

in order of awesome-ness. id like to keep my tax marks as it is but the test next thursday probably wont allow me such comforts..

i owe NatLim $12.80

a whole bunch of MANGA have been released. i wanna get them. no money.

ditto storybooks like pendragon.

james thinks im the last one to read his Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. havent seen it in AGES.

ICE AGE 3D was cool. definitely getting the DVD

have yet to watch Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince. will probably buy the DVD (since i have 1st 5 alr) and forego watching it in the theatres. heard acting isnt tt good, too many romance scenes, and youd only watch it for Tom Felton's HOT bod. :X

i should stop blogging and start trying to finish my part in FF project due next friday 4pm.

but i havent blogged in ages. feel guilty. also because i havent been journalling as well. which is bad. i like reading my old journal entries. start laughing and going "OH, that stupid girl..."

i think i'll write one more thing before going..

10.32% MORE TO BECOME HERO IN MOUSEHUNT AS AT 10:43PM, 23 JULY 2009 XDXDXDXDXDXDXD

Posted by Ce at 10:33 pm

Thursday, April 30, 2009

heh. so i havent been here in some time. decided i should post. since its like last day of april 2009 ever. havent been here and the format looks same but there are some extra features...

ANYWAYS. heh. talking to kheh hong now. oO sanding his throne zwei gundam looks interesting LOL not that i know whats happening ._.

SO. tomorrow IHMYC is having a May Day/Labour Day outing to Sentosa. XD time to get tan and TRY to lose a bit of weight. tan possible, weight not quite.

id like to post more but i cant concentrate. heh.

Posted by Ce at 8:15 pm

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Wong Jerome is creating a blog. LOL and for once the computer mojo is asking MUA the computer idiot how to do "tech savvy" stuff. like how to put in skin and cbox. LOL

anyways. so thats one reason for finally posting. the next reason...

TODAY WAS RELEASE OF SEM2 RESULTS!!

needless to say, im happy. for now. deliriously happy. cuz my cummulative GPA has increased from like 3.1 to 3.375 xD

here are my results xD

DIST - IT Applications for Business II
A - Economics
A - Critical Reasoning Skills
A - Statistics (this is a shocker)
B+ - Personal Financial Planning
B - Innovative Design and Enterprise in Action (this is a shocker too)
B - Principles of Accountancy (this is sad but expected cuz if my shitty final exam)
C+ - Management and Organisational Behaviour (im alright i guess. at least i didnt fail. before the finals i was bordering a fail so im kinda glad yet no so. but the final could only do so much eh?)

so yup. xD

theres band today. Adrian Chiang is our new conductor.

Luke said some SP trumpetter went to teach the Cat High trumpet section yesterday. Gold trumpet and gold edge mouth piece. im thinking its An Chun. lol.

Posted by Ce at 11:02 am

Saturday, January 17, 2009

ok... i know i promised to update today and HERE I AM!! though im actually just gonna list the things im supposed to be writing about. im tired, sleepy, worn out, which all essentially mean the same thing but who cares eh?

its about 14 minutes to Agnes Chongs 16th birthday as im typing this.

lets see... list of thing right?

1. YC session on 17th Jan 2009. First session with chicklets [new recruits/yr1s]
2. O level results Class of 2008
3. SP Open House 8-10 Jan 2009
4. An Chun

this is seriously getting into an obsession. as with all my infatuations past present mostly likely future. Woes of a girl who finds boyfriends impossibly unattainable.

oh and i almost forgot...

5. 5 DAMN STUPID PROJECTS DUE IN WEEK 4 AND 5.

so yes. all shall leave Ce to sleep or all shall face the wrath of a dead tired Bunchkin who has no quelms of having guts on a stick.

Posted by Ce at 11:35 pm

Tuesday, January 06, 2009

heh. got this from V's blog...

Three names you go by:
1. Cecilia
2. Ce
3. CheeBaBoom

Three screen names you have:
1. bakarica
2. kab
3. ailiricxxz

Three Parts of your heritage:
1. er... chinese? CHONG AND LIM FAMILY
2. CHIJ
3. ihmyc/ihm

Three things that scare you:
1. insects
2. horror and gore
3. darkness and death

Three of your everyday essentials:
1. wallet. impt for food consumption
2. mp3
3. my ELEPHANTS

Three things you're wearing now:
1. white sp shirt
2. undergarments [yah cuz its under my shirt and PANTS]
3. transitions specs~

Three of your favourite songs:
1. james barnes third symphony mvt 3
2. forever... erementar gerad
3. receive the power [for now]

Two truths and a lie in no particular order:
1. i hate this question
2. i love this question
3. i hate this question

Three of your favourite hobbies:
1. reading
2. listening to music
3. playing with my stuffed toys

Three things you want to do really badly now:
1. go home and sleep
2. play my trombone
3. pee

Three careers you're considering:
1. accountant BIG 4!!
2. music teacher
3. secretary somewhere lol

Three places you want to go on vacation to:
1. rome/vatican
2. Japan
3. Prague

Three things you want to do before you die:
1. write a will [make sure someone takes care of my elephants]
2. Hug everyone ive known in my lifeesp best friends
3. have my own family

Three things that make you stereotypically a boy:
1. no skirts.
2. i hang out with mainly guys
3. i hate makeup

Three things that make you stereotypically a girl:
1. physique
2. scream like nuts
3. like disney

Posted by Ce at 11:14 am

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

wow.

so many things to talk about.

but my main purpose here is to get off whats bothering me right now.

many things pop up during get togethers. thats the good and bad thing about parties. especially barbeque parties where u spend ample amounts of time around the smallish grill waiting for your satay, hot dogs and chicken wings to cook.

i'll just get straight to the blasted point.

i might not be involved in catechism next year.

well, firstly theres the problem that we wont be considered as IHMYC members anymore. we meaning my year people, excluding the ex-co. i think. because of some rubbish system thats been implemented. theyre even going to change how some things are taught in class aka no more skits. and theyre changing how admin is being done. i dont agree at all with the changes but i am willing to rough it up and adapt to the obnoxiously never ceasing change.

but Terence has to bring up "has Augustine called you yet?" Augustine aka Peanut aka new-secondary-school-level-coordinator-who-cant-even-coordinate-sec-1-alone.

so obviously i havent received such a call. and theyre right. theyre being selective about who gets to be involved in class next year. this either means im youth group-less or theyre letting me stay in YC. but whatever it is, this is a rubbish way of showing that you want your confirmants to be involved in a youth group especially YC which has been on the decline. first you tell them to serve where they feel their calling is and next you tell them to get lost and do their own stuff until theyre about 2-3 years older and only then we talk business. hello? part of remaining in church at first is the pool of close friends.

so yes. because i havent had a call which most have received ages ago it is safe to say that im probably not going to be involved in catechism next year.

maybe this is a way of telling me i should youth group hop every year.

or a hint im not to work in catechesis.

maybe i'll get my chance to be in ZJ?

having your morales and goals crush above your low self-esteem sucks balls.