The tooth crew

Yesterday I had to call another parent. Why you ask? Mason.  We got to play after school today in the snow with your friends.  Ela had brought snow making blocks, you grabbed one up and things were going splendidly.  Mom's getting to visit while kids enjoyed the snow.  All at once you came running up to me and said "Mika put snow in my eyes" I rubbed your back and told you it was fine and then Mika came running up to her mom "Mason put snow down my back.  Understatement, her hood from her snowsuit was filled with snow and as a few of the mom's were trying to get it out and she was saying she was so cold, I was coming unglued.  I'm not sure why you would have done that, and of course I was apologizing like crazy but I was mad, because it felt like a parent fail.  I was going to make you write a note but didn't want to wait till Monday to give it to her so we decided to make a phone call instead.  So we called her and you apologized, and to be fair I was just as nervous as you but when your a parent you'll understand that one of the greatest lessons we can teach you is to own up to your own mistakes.  No one is going to cover or baby you and tell you it's okay when you've done something wrong.  Character lesson. 

We were going to be gone for Abbie's birthday so we decided to have it earlier on Thanksgiving weekend. So other than feeling a little rotten (read last entry) it was a great day for her. This princess has been taking about her birthday since April.

The SUNDAY DEC 20TH
We headed to the airport at 6:05 am, bags packed, kids excited and I can barely contain myself. Flight was great, arrived early, bags and car seats quickly grabbed, our only delay was the car rental. Booo. Then on our way, as we drove south the mountains looked majestic. There was snow in the tops and the sun was hitting them. Oh how I miss my mountains. We arrived at William and Kate's and were so excited to see them and Christian and McKennas little face.
After that we picked up Subway to take back and the kids played. Christian has a helper not sure her correct title but she came and Kate and her played lots of games with the kids, made cookies, had art time for a couple of hours. Then we went downstairs and watched movies and had popcorn with the kids.
Our kids are really going to miss being in Alberta around my family. They have been playing for hours on end, snuggling each other and aunts and enjoying this and its only day 1!!!!  Kate and I ran to the mall quickly and she took me the brewery garden way which took me down memory lane. They always had it decorated for each holiday and the Christmas decorations were up along with the nativity. Its funny how somethings you forget till it all comes rushing back. Great memories.

















Then to Auntie Trina's house.
After some dog walking and snuggling we went and took the kids bowling. Auntie Trina's treat.
  Then some of the guys went for guys night out to the Star Wars movie.
My dad started feeling really rough and so as soon as this picture was taken they were headed back to Saskatchewan.  I worry about them, all the traveling they do and of course their health.  So I didn't feel like the kids really got to visit with them or me either as we saw them just for a few days.  At least they will be coming out to Ottawa at the end of January.  After we went out to Duncan's to see his new house, it is fantastic and beautiful.  The kids had a ball playing together and Mandy and I visited on the couch and Alin and Duncan went downstairs to watch the hockey game.  Then Duncan asked the family to meet him where his band practices and we had a little dance party.  Awesome with strobe lights, music and good company.  The kids had an absolute ball and was so fun.  Some of Mandy's family were there too.

We stayed at the Holiday Inn last night as our tour time was 10:15. It was nice not to feel rushed and have breakfast than just head over. It was a beautiful day, sun shining and plus 9, and no snow. We watched a little video first about what happens in temples and then we went to the temple. It's quite a small temple but beautiful inside. The same sweet feeling every where. I really wanted our family to have this opportunity to go thru together. As we sat in the celestial room with its amazing chandelier and all the kids around us and quiet, it was easy to be thankful for this little family. We then moved to the sealing room and as we sat there the guide was talking about how we can be married for time and eternity or converts can be sealed together as a family and what more would kids want to hear than that they were sealed and belonged to their family forever. At this point I could feel tears starting, as we were getting ready to leave Alin picked up Mason and had him look in the mirrors in the sealing room, then Dani so they could look and see themselves forever in the mirrors, I picked Abbie up on the other side.  The next room they took us in was the bridal room where brides would get ready. There is a also a huge mirror in this room and I was just looking around and when I turned back Dani was standing square in front of the mirror and smiling at herself, in that one split second the tears brimmed over and fell down my cheeks. She looked beautiful and in my minds eye she was standing there getting ready for her wedding day. I need to be around for that, I need her to make good choices, to marry a man that will make her feel beautiful everyday. That will treat her like a queen, that will watch over her. If she found someone like Alin I would rest easy. I then picked up Abbie and put her in front of the mirror so she could see herself. As I held Abbie when we were walking out she asked my why I was crying I told her they were happy tears so she then proceeded to wipe them for me. As we were leaving the temple, the elderly gentleman that was our guide asked to shake the kids hands and told them they were the most reverent kids that he'd seen on the tour. That makes this mom happy. 

Tonight as we were putting you all to bed, it was a relatively calm affair and dare I say even a little fun.  Hair braided, teeth brushed, I love you's said and then a pit in the bottom of my stomach as I told Dani "I love you Dani" and she replied "Not today" when I asked why she said because "I was picking my nose" (picking her nose till she had 3 bleeding noses) I thought I was even calm about it when I said "Quit touching your nose" "it's going to keep bleeding".  In fact it didn't even register with me that this was an issue...till bedtime.  Honestly it broke my heart a little, I reassured her that mom will always love her, even when she picks her nose, even if she's being a turkey, even if... the thing about it is that every single night I say to you kids.  "I love you" how much...this much, for how long...forever and a day, to the moon and back, no matter what.  Tomorrow is a fresh day and I will work harder that they know it's not just words I'm saying but that I truly feel that way.  You three, I am your mom,  I will love you forever, I will always love you, NO MATTER WHAT.  xxoo

Monday morning instead of waiting for the office to open I just drove there and waited to see her by this time there were more and covering more territory.  When she examined me she concluded that it was an allergic reaction and sent me home telling me to get some Benedryl and Reactine. I started on them right away and noticed the itching got a little better but the hives were now traveling up my arms, other legs, back.  Monday night Josh Dugan and Brother Healge came over to give me a blessing ( In Josh's blessing he said that I would return to health but the doctor and doctors would be able to figure out, I remember thinking Dr.s? I just want to go to one and be fixed)  Wednesday I went back in, it was taking on a different look and was starting to turn purple in the middle of the areas, she thought it was a little different and sent me for a ton of blood tests and then I came home.  Thursday my legs started swelling, saw her again and had her colleague give a second opinion.  Friday I went again and she took pictures and referred me to Monfort Hospital to see a dermatologist.  Saturday was Abbie's birthday party and I didn't want to cancel it for her so we had a great time and I will post in a separate post about it.  Alin's parents were back again this weekend for Thanksgiving and Abbie's Birthday party. Saturday evening I developed a fever and Dr. Rodrigue had told me if that happened to go to the emergency room.  So Sunday morning found me in the emergency room and a waste of time as they gave me a Rx for steroids but I wasn't supposed to take them till after my biopsy on Tuesday.  Thanksgiving was a right off for us, Alin's parents made it but I just couldn't get into the holiday and I was feeling super stressed and sick.  Alin's parents left on Monday and on Tuesday Alin took off work so I could go to the hospital for the biopsy.  I stopped first at Dr. Rodrigue for her to take another look and collect some info and blood work results to take to Dr. Julie Lacroix.  By this time it's been 9 days since everything started, my body is covered everywhere, except for my face.  So people talk to me and have no idea how awful the rest of me feels because I don't look unwell in my face.  I sat down at the hospital waiting for my visit and laid on the couch, I was exhausted, worried and feeling horrible, my legs are so swollen, red and hot in the thighs and hives have shown up on the palms of my hands, feet and everywhere.  She pulled me into the room, talked to me for a bit and then was thinking they would do a quick biopsy, she then asked me to take off my clothes, put on a robe and then she would come back in.  When she came back in she took one look at me and said "we are admitting you" Words like Steven Johnsons disease, EM major, Em minor, and a plethora of other things were thrown around.  I was shocked I never expected them to admit me right then.  I hadn't even properly kissed the kids and Alin good bye or packed anything.  In fact I had a half eaten apple in Alin's car because I was going to finish it when I got out.  I started to cry, this is not where I was wanting to be.  Called Alin and explained and then waited for a room.  That night they did a chest xray, started me on drugs to shut my immune system down, put a sign over my bed that said Cytoxin and I was overwhelmed, scared, missing my family and worried.  It seems no one knows what it is but are starting at the worse case scenerio's.  Dan McAteer and Josh Dugan came over to the hospital again to give me another blessing. When Bishop Dan asked me how I was I burst into tears, it's the not knowing that's driving me crazy and being away from my family. Part of the blessing was that I would be calm and return to health that I would trust in the doctors that they would do the best in their expertise. Everyone left soon after that and I could feel myself fall apart. I dislike immensely being alone. I have never liked it. The lady next door called out for a nurse every 5 minutes and I lay there and watched the clock tick by moment by moment. Alin handles stress by doing things and not going to bed. Some of the text messages that night...