MY ALTATUDE ON LIFE

So I have found a new love. Aprons! I am not sure how I got onto this, but I am fascinated by them. I love looking at the old vintage ones and reading about the women wore them. I have found some old ones that I am going to try and remake! I will post more as I make them. I have decided that I am going to start wearing them around. Let me know what you think! Or id you have any ideas!

"Welcome To Holland", written by Emily Perl Kingsley, a writer for Sesame Street and the mother of a now-adult son with Down Syndrome
©1987 by Emily Perl Kingsley. All rights reserved.

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this
When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.
After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."
"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."
But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.
The important thing is they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.
So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you never would have met.
It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around and you begin to notice Holland has windmills and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.
But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say, "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."
And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away because the loss of that dream is a very, very significant loss.
But if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to go to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things about Holland.

THIS IS MY HOLLAND
Dearest Friends;

This post is the best way I have found to explain what I have been feeling for almost a year. I know that Elliot has only been diagnosed for about 9 months, but ever since he was born I knew that something was different. He wasn't the same Italy that I had been to twice before. But I do want you to know that I learning to love Holland, I am starting to see the beautiful fields of Tulips, and I have found the beauty in watching the windmills. I have met many amazing people in Holland that I never would have other wise. I have found Heros that I want Elliot to look up to and emulate. I have learned how to deeply love without condition. I look at people in a new light. I have learned that each of us have our own battles that we will struggle with. This is what makes us the wonderful people that we are. If you read this and find yourself want to cry, don't feel bad, I am, have, and will continue too, but please feel embraced by knowing others are in Holland with you. We are never alone, just one kneel away and you will be embraced by someone who knows your heart. I love you all, and deeply appreciate all of your love you have shown towards me. We will hold on tight, and learn to love Holland together! We will be better Mothers, Fathers, Siblings, and Friends for it!
Much Love and Appreciation to you all,
your friend,
Alta

I would like to announce that Elliot has now tripled his birth weight! Hooray for Elliot. It has been a long time coming, but he finally did it. We went in for a check up with Dr. Jesse the other day, and I was so pleased with how well Elliot is growing. Whenever we come in and weigh Elliot all the nurses that are around come cheer him on. They are so cute and say little things like, "Think heavy thoughts", or "Sit hard little buddy." I always tell them our goal for the month, which this month was 15lbs. So far we haven't made our goals, but this month we did. As he sat on the scale and we were waiting for the final numbers to show up, I was holding my breath and crossing my fingers, eyes, legs, whatever I could, and it came out to be 15 lbs even. We all cheered for him. I am sure that the people in the waiting room were thinking some crazies were in the back room. We were all so excited. I also have felt so relieved since we was weighed. It is nice to know that were are doing at least something right. It has been hard worrying about him all of the time, which I still do, but not to the point that I get a pit in my stomach anymore. Life is starting to get to a normal. I can't say back to normal, but our life schedule is becoming a normal for us, I guess a good word is comfortable. Mornings are crazy though, trying to get Elliot's therapy done, while getting Lizzie and Charlie ready for school. Wow, by 10am I am ready to take a nap with Elliot. I just wanted to share that we are doing great, and are happy and healthy! Or little CF boy is starting to grow and that makes the rest of us overflowing with joy! Oh yes I also wanted to say that Elliot took him first step yesterday. He is so funny looking standing there so small, but you gotta love it!

So Lizzie and I have been looking on the internet for cute hair do's and this is the one that she picked for today. It is called a river runs through it. And No, I did not name it. As many of you might be thinking. She was so excited and was also pretty nervous. She woke up at about 6:30, and wondered around the house until it was time to go. That wasn't until 10. So pretty fun, also it looks like you are getting a sneak preview of Halloween. Charlie is going to be a spider again. So fun!

The other day I was in the kitchen cutting up watermelon for our neighborhood lawn party, and I sat Charlie in front of my computer to watch a movie to keep him preoccupied. I put the Polar Express in, one of Charlie favorites. He was memorized by the movie which was nice because I was pushing it time wise. Hopefully you have seen the show so that you will remember the part about the movie I am about to describe. During this certain scene a little poor boy is on the back of the train singing about how he has never seen Christmas before, and the little girl is singing with him but telling him how wonderful it is. It really is a touching scene, but to my surprise Charlie turns around and looks at me with tears falling down his checks, and said in a soft choked up voice, "Mommy, This is so sad, the little boy has never seen Christmas before. It just is making me so sad." OK so that just made me brake down go over and give him a huge hug and shed some tears with him. Not because the movie is so sweet, but that my little boy is so sweet and tender that he was so moved a silly animated movie. He just might drive me crazy most of the day, but these are the moments that I will treasure forever.