Monday, January 23, 2006, 12:30 am
amazed
The house I live in is over 30 yrs old and so are most of the neighbours who live near me. The white cat nx door with the one green n one blue eye is prolly older than I am. Beneath the peach painted walls of my 4rm upgraded flat.. are really old time stories that my daddy told me over dinner today. I learnt abt theft, money lending, affairs.. even fridge and television lending to poor neighbours. And I learnt today too then neighbours of the past are so different from the neighbours of today. I mean if you look at ur neighbours nw.. most of them close their doors and you can stay beside them for yrs and they past ur door everyday at the same time every day with their telltale shift in their walk or the heavy tapping of their heels outside your corridor and yet you still wun know their name or what they do for a living.
I wonder if it's really such a bad thing to be friendly and to get to know ppl more. I'm the known kpo in my office because I wld find out the background of any new colleagues and that makes me more inquisitive than the others. But I dunno hw best to start a conversation than to get to know the other party better. And because when I dun smile I really look helleva fierce so I make it a point to strike a conversation first with ppl who dun talk to me. And I actually like ppl to know me better too so I will volunteer info even when they dun ask.. Talk abt being thick skin haha..
Took a well deserved leave from work on a I hope wun rain Monday becoz I want to go shopping tmr. =X I've also taken the initiative to have sibling day this week with my bro. You know hw when you grow up and you forgot hw much fun you used to have with ur siblings? Esp for me coz my bro is no longer staying with me since 5 yrs ago. Just because a lover, good friends and nice colleagues came into your life. Thats what happened to me the past few yrs and I think its always a good idea to spend some quality time with ppl you really care abt bt take for granted will always be there. Was just lamenting to my dad today that when my bro really becomes ordained then the whole family really cannot sit together for church service anymore. The 2005 xmas svc at indoor stadium was special for me because its been like 10 yrs since the last time I sat beside my bro for svc..
I'm starting school soon! Ok at least I'm starting school this yr just tt I haven erm enrolled myself into a course. But I'm feeling so excited abt skool already. Then I can go on those popular stationery shopping spree and buy myself a nice schoolbag hehe..And the best part is I'm paying for the diploma with my own money! *pats myself on the back. I'm really proud of it and I know Tirene is paying for her own course too. But guess for the degree which is 18K plus 4K in the last yr for studies in the US.. I wld have to borrow from the bank unless an inexplicable miracle happens before me.
You know working has taught me and opened my eyes to quite a few things and one of them is that the straight route to a university path is when you finish JC and you get enrolled in a local U. I've always had that myopic view and thought thats hw you can only get a degree. But well I'm wrong. I know of colleagues who work full time in the bank and take a partime degree at night. It's like working and gaining experience and then getting the degree later to secure a better salary in your current job. They are doing the reverse because normally you study first then look for a job... but I think its nt such a bad idea to secure a job first and accumulating the experience. And I do realise that experience with degree is more favoured than fresh faced Uni grad with no experience. Dunno why I'm rambling on abt all these but perhaps its due to the fact I've been thinking alot abt my future and where to go from here. Because I have been set free to choose my education path and I have no restrictions and ultimate support no matter what I study.. thus that troubles me. hehe..
I just might go KL, Bangkok and Aussie this yr if finances allow.. Holidays keep me sane and at least once a yr since I was 15 I have to get out of the country with friends because I abhor the lifestyle of this country.
And before I leave...I just have to holler... I'm getting my EPILATOR tmr!!! Say goodbye to Veet, waxing and my faithful gillette! =X
Wednesday, January 18, 2006, 12:02 am
amazed
I am back on the blogosphere after having no motivation whatsoever to blog or go online. You know for once in my life this mth I was thinking abt money.. abt saving and abt hw on earth I'm gonna start school with goodness knows whatever money I've saved. I'm nt thrifty.. never ever. So I've been wondering what I'm gonna do when I do stop working in the bank. I guess it would have to be work and study. I guess my small girl dreams of being a plain and normal NUS full time student will nv come to pass. Even when I go back to school I guess I will not take money from daddy ever. I'm proud of friends who work and support themselves and nt take money for their education. Preeti darling is one such friend I wld be glad to take after. =)
On my family life.. been meaning to say that my brother is gonna be a pastor in my church starting nx mth and I'm so so proud of him. I mean if my mum was ard she wld be so proud of him too. It wld be something she wld have no qualms telling her friends abt.. A mother's pride is just not explainable. Anyway, my bro's been an inspiration. 11 yrs and gender apart.. but I feel that I would never choose to be anyone else's sister than his. He was there for my jealousy, my downfalls, my breakups and his advices never fail to point me to the cross. It's like I need someone's advice and he is just an sms away.
The niece knows how to sing the "I love you, you love me.. we are happy family" song and she is such a delight.. you have to see her to know how much I love her. Attended my sis in law's elder sis wedding on one of the sat this mth and oh manz the wedding chapel in CHIJMES is so pretty..I was nearing tears I tell ya when I looked at their video on how they met and their speech to each other.. so sweet.. You know there's just something with me and emotional moments and I found myself visualising how on earth I was gonna get married.. the gowns.. the vows.. etc.. Suddenly it overwhelms me that it's gonna be just FIVE freaking yrs before I wanna get married.. 25 is my dream age you see.. And with no man in sight and no man that impresses.. it scares the shit out of me.. Preeti and I were talking abt this issue a couple of weeks back and she was saying she wants me to date but I dun ever see myself doing that.. I've been thinking if I date.. wld I fill my blog entries with my partner and my dating info? Wld I fill my friendster with love coated fotos of the two of us? But then agn that grosses me out to the max because I really do detest reading or looking at such stuff in other ppls' account.. when it becomes an overdose of sweetness I mean.. =)
You ever wake up one fine day and get grossed out by your wardrobe, your collection of shoes and bags? I did. It's like overnight I can't stand my choice of bags and shoes and dun understand why I ever bot them. But I swear at the point of purchase I did love them. Not anymore though. Just bot a whole bunch of clothes to replace many of those I will nv wear out agn. And then I wonder if it's pure influence by the ppl in my office who cannot take to my style or just the fact I'm freaking 20 in 2 mths and I'm no longer Ms Teenager..
Btw this is to my animal farm... nana banana and hammie. I dreamt of the two of you like two days ago and I just cannot believe it.. Separate bt continuous dreams in one night. Damn weird I tell ya.. I wonder why do humans have dreams? Are they subconscious thoughts of humans or what man.. hehe To my darling Parquack.. happy belated 20th babe.. love you and wld love to see ya soon.
I have a very sparse looking fridge and no new yr goodies at all in the house. I think I need to drag friends down with me to chinatown to feel the chinese new yr spirit coz it sure ain in the air in my house.
Oh I just read in the Today newspaper abt this Aussie degree that offers hospitality management I think and has a module in casino management... it's some integrated resort industry thingy.. And I'm kinda interested.. Maybe I won't take up Mass Comm at MDIS after all..
Ok I'm pretty much brain dead at this pt.. so I shall just end here.. =)
Tuesday, January 10, 2006, 12:27 pm
amazed
I need to hold my horses just in case I suffer from verbal diarrhoea and puke everything out from the past 10 days of happenings. As usual I had a quiet new yr spent at home. At the stroke of midnight I promptly got up from the sofa and went to bed since I had church early the next morning. How's that for a new start to the new yr? hehe. But atlas the airport for the night event made up for it all. Airport wasn't spectacular, the company was.
Began the second day of new yr with my clique of beloveds having a homecooked meal prepared by my brainy's mum. We engaged in serious talk abt family politics and finances and it suddenly occurred to me it wld be great to not grow up so I dun have to be riddled with all this shit in the adult life. I keep thinking to myself if one can live harmoniously with your siblings during childhood.. how is it that adult life made one dull and selfish and bitchified when money comes into the picture? Money sure makes the world go round and blind.
I have been on some weird 'feeling its' this mth. It's either I suddenly do springcleaning for my rm at 9pm at night or I go on a drama serial dvd marathon. So far I've finished like 3 drama serials of abt 60 plus episodes already. And my dad swears he will cut off the tv line if I engaged in some more of these couch potato activities.
It's a new yr and what suddenly scares me is the thought that I have to make a decision abt my studies soon. Then finances come into the picture and uncertainties too. You know when I was younger.. when I moved on to a new pri or sec school what scared me was not being abt to make new friends. Now what scares me is the school fees that I have to pay myself and whether the course I choose wld be the course I really love and enjoy to take up. I hate making choices and decisions. But I guess it comes with the process of growing up since I will no longer be a teenager in 2 mths plus to come.
This yr's reunion dinner will be so weird for me and the family. No mummy to cook so we're having a joint celebration of reunion dinner cum my niece's 2nd birthday on the day before the reunion dinner. That means on reunion dinner night.. my dad and I got to settle our own dinner because my bro is going over to his in laws for steamboat. Suddenly I just want CNY to pass by quickly because the feeling for celebrations isnt there at all. No new yr goodies or bak kwa or good food to look forward to. I'm feeling so forlorn abt everything. And unless I decide to cook for dad on the 28th I guess we have to settle for fast food. Din make new yr resolutions this yr coz it nv comes to past and I end up recycling them every yr. But maybe this yr I really got to make the effort to cook because my dad cant always eat outside food. N maybe nx yr I can cook the reunion dinner feast for my family. sighz..
It's seriously been a wet january but tt doesnt stop me from shopping later.. Shopping for new yr clothes being the excuse.. *winks..
