My blog and I have finally come to the end of another year. As with every year, I would usually recollect my thoughts for this year. The year 2 0 0 7 has indeed passed by extremely fast. As I sit down and try to recollect how this year has been extremely favoured and blessed for Grace, I cannot but be filled with a sense of love, to recognise that I'm one step closer to whatever that God has already destined in my life.

This year I thank God. . .

- I had an extremely blessed 21st birthday celebration. 4 times!
- I finally got a pink digicam camera. And I was so close to paying for it by my own money
- Going to Hillsong Conference in Sydney and holiday for 14 days. Undeserved favour and an experience I never want to forget.
- Realising how protected my friendships are by Daddy God.
- Knowing that Daddy God was with me every step of the way in my Advanced Diploma.
- For all the distinctions I had in my Advanced Diploma.
- Blinding my lecturer's eyes to a very not perfect powerpoint slide presentation and still awarding me my distinction. It's favour many times over.
- For the new friendships birthed this year.
- Every single fellowship with all my dearest bros and sistas in christ. From simple dinner, shopping, games, movies, to places where we just lie down and star gaze at His goodness. I will never forget.
- Providing for me and I finally paid up for my Advanced Diploma.
- Opened doors so I could take a loan and continue my Degree studies.
- For protecting my family with great favour, health and a roof over our heads.

and many more.

I could never forget 2007 for the extreme emotions and situations I felt with my family and friends. But I'm awaiting 2 0 0 8 with greater anticipation I just want to be pushed into the year right now. His love, favour, peace, joy and blessings be greater magnified and manifested in 2 0 0 8. Something's changed inside of me and I just wanna live my life for Christ in 2 0 0 8. See you dearies in the new year.

May my Daddy God open many many many new chapters in my life and lay the ground for me to exercise my faith in. It's a brand new exciting year. All 3 6 6 days of it.

Blessed Brand New Year.

Much Love,
Amazing Grace =)

Blessed Christmas my dearest friends and Happy Boxing Day to those who have self declared a holiday upon themselves. I have recovered from my last emotional post. The Grace of the past few days actually looks forward to 2008 with great expectations. I know the common thought on almost everyone's mind is how fast the yr 2007 has past you by. For me, I thank my Daddy God that my blessings far outnumber the challenges in my life in 2007. There has been a great number of people who ask me to tell them the meaning of life. I can't quite seem to even begin to describe to them how big my God is in my life. I find reason to live, times to rejoice and praises to sing because of my Daddy God. If He holds the big universe in the palm of His hand, He must be H U G E! And absolutely nothing in my life is too difficult for my Daddy God to redeem.

This christmas despite not anticipating nor expecting extravagent celebrations nor deep feelings of joy... my Daddy God overflowed me with His love. The new word in Grace's dictionary is OVERWHELMING. Alot of His greatness in my life has overwhelmed me, blessing me left, right and centre. I'm anticipating a great 2008, I don't want to be known as Grace the girl who is a student and part time worker. NO! I want to rise up, reposition myself for my portion and be the woman of God He has called me to be. Alot of thoughts run through my mind but I choose to always praise Him in all my storms. Look out late great planet earth, Daddy God's precious Historymaker is ready to embrace her giftings and callings. 2008 is the beginning of something new and great for my life.

I clearly desire and know that I want no one else to shower me with true love other than the great Lover of my soul, my Daddy God. For the present time, I want to be shown in a greater capacity through the Living Word His love and faithfulness to me. I want to be secure and established in my thoughts and to acknowledge Him in whatever I do. =)))

Christmas wasn't a typical annual event for me. Dinner and spending time with the family, going to Anais's house, talking about the promises in our lives, surprising John with sparkles, logcake and alot more. Hehe. Meeting the clique for steamboat, Minds cafe and experiencing love.

Portraits of J O Y. . .

Church at the Indoor Stadium. Some of the congregation.

Kern and Cheryl after svc. Christmas love in the air.

Again.

Simple Joy

Alot of heart, sincerity and effort. I hope you love it much dear Anais.

Sparkles and surprising Beloved John.

Lighting a candle to remember my mum on christmas morning.

Grace's treasures.

Glorious Anais and Grace.

Everybody's favourite LAO GO!!

Accidental portrait of beauty and pure joy.

Cows in black. Sean Moo is love.

More of the Moo family.

The favoured, loved and blessed clique.

Its been more than 5 yrs and counting. From glory to glorious. . . Grace.Christline.Angie

love

Look at those hunks go. . .


Grace's Gems.

I love Cline brainy deep deep.

Whilst playing our game of picture charades.. Euwin (Ewwie Koh Chingy ching ching aka Lao Go) thinks this picture he did looks even remotely like a F I S H! Bah!

One of the clique had to describe the word tattoo. So now I know a tattoo needle looks like this and the person wants to get a circle, cross and triangle for a tattoo. Hehehe.. We are all very creative ppl. Amen! hehe..

Lao Go and his three concubines i mean glorious friends.

Family portrait.

My hunks, my hunks my hunks my HUNKS. Hee..

of hugs, love and joy. ps: Thank u babes for hugging my fats. Had to suck in when u all hug me. *Blush hahaha..

Taking turns to be the centre of hugs.

My favourite girlies hug pic.


And I love all of you. Grace Muddercow's precious ones-Sean Ezekiel, Christline Estelle, Angie Baby and Euwin Lao Go. Thank you Daddy God for preserving, protecting and prospering the friendships, bond and love forged amongst the clique members. I see many more years of growth and accelerated revelations to be birthed in this blessed fellowship.

=)

This year for the Tan family, will be like the past 2 christmas. Dinner at my brother's house on christmas eve. He whipping up christmas dishes and filling in the void left by my mum. I haven talked about her for quite a long time on this blog. But this season of christmas, I feel particularly vulnerable. The pain has never lessen one single bit all these time. I just will myself not to think, dwell and occupy myself with alot of stuff. But its because of my inability to voice out, to cry and to say for one single moment all these years that I have been in pain and cannot help but feel a void in my heart.

This christmas, I know its a time to remember the birth of Jesus Christ, to share love and bless the ones I love. But the one person I really wanna show love to is no longer by my side. Christmas has never been the same for me, every single family meal we have, every time we take family pictures, its just never complete.

My brother smsed me the other day to tell me he just decorated the christmas tree in his house and lighted them up. For me, a christmas tree has become a very sore issue in my heart. That's because I remember the times I decorated the christmas tree with my mum, I remember how when we finally put up the huge star or angel at the top of the tree, how when we lighted up the christmas tree, how when placing gifts under the tree, I knew my heart and hers would be filled with such a warmth. I can never decorate another christmas tree again till I've gotten over remembering those feelings.

It's really been very very tough to be a 21 year old girl in the Tan family, the responsibilites I'm shouldering myself, the need to be the woman in the family to my dad, to mature beyond my years and make important decisions, to seek reassurance from no one but myself, to always be strong in front of my dad and for him. I treasure my friends and family alot and I'm grateful to the girlies and some of my hunks who just want to meet me and love me and find out how I have been doing.

I wonder how this christmas will be like. But I really pray and hope that there will be people who come my way and spend the 12 days of christmas with me. That it would not be spent lonesomely missing my mum. I want to feel Daddy God's tangible love for me this season. That I truly truly can be so secured in His love for me this christmas. I have no needs, no desires for christmas presents. All I truly want is to be filled with is His presence in my life. The strength from Him to be strong for my family and the other loved ones who need to draw from me. I learnt to have no expectations from Man because they can fail me and I hate being disappointed.

I'm seldom this vulnerable on my blog, but seriously amidst the outings, meals and smiles from the pictures u see, my feelings and emotions are very real as well. Because I am this vulnerable, I cannot bear if someone takes my vulnerability and steps all over it. Thats why for most part, in front of people I don't know very well, I give a very stoic and aloof appearance.

I really believe that 2008 is gonna be the start of many many many wonderful and great things to happen for my life and I hope to really really be able to step out of the shadow of my pain and be a pillar of strength to my loved ones. =)

I just came back from meeting up with my girlies, Christline and Angie. I am really really amazed how Daddy God just protects and preserves my friendship with these precious babes. They have been with me through so many storms, blessings, laughter and tears and just catching up with them today was so overwhelmingly anointed, blessed and filled. We shared and shared about much revelations, what we have been going through and they are really the firm foundations that I know I can rely on. I marvel at how the year 2007 is really REALLY ending and we were counting the times we met up. Not much I must say but I feel that each time I meet up with them, its like pumping the petrol in my spiritual car, recharging me each time.

I wonder if any of you have gone out for a catching up session filled to the brim with feelings of goodness and adrenaline. I have that pumped up feeling now. And in so speaking, I also like to say that I miss Euwin and Sean Moo in the clique too.

The year is ending and everyone is rushing to meet up before they really have to say "see you next year." I have been asking my friends, what have you desired for 2008? What are you looking forward to? If you read my blog, you would know every year I say I don't make resolutions but I do dream big dreams. I really believe there is more to life than just school, work, heartbreaks and the same 4 walls you return to every day.

And in so looking forward to 2008, don't start regretting things you din attain in 2007. I'd rather be very very thankful for the blessings I DID get in 2007, for the people that Daddy God placed in my life to impact and love me. Blessings like John and Maye who showed me how the simplest faith can move mountains in their lives, their support and strength in moments when I fall, the vulnerability they showed me and in doing so allowed me to feel privileged that I'm trusted by them.

I did have a great 2007 and nothing beats beginning my 2nd yr of Uni at the end of 2007 to be the icing of the cake of a whole list of new experiences that will be in the chronicles of my life.

Anw photo updates from today. . . (I do have a ton of pics I need to post but I'll save that for later)

My Swordfish Collar was OVERWHELMING! =(

This photo was taken after we ate. So do not be mistaken, beneath the smiles lies a very full us. Haha

Toilet lovinggg.. haha..

The theme was tourism. We aimed to look like tourists and yes with all that shopping bags, I bet we achieved that.

It's proving to be exceptionally tough to trust and open up to the sincere people who love me and getting hurt by the people I try to be real to but who dun really care.

I'm starting school this coming sat and suddenly I feel like its a whole coming of age thing again. Like decisions, decisions and decisions. Making them all by myself can prove to be a lonely affair and not willing to update my peers on "how have you been quizzing?" Simply because how many of them after updating them actually remember how I'm really doing man.

As much as the christmas lights are up, I'm not feeling christmas this yr. No time to get gifts and though its a season of giving, I feel kinda tired. Recently I came upon a revelation from a friend who told me tt I apparently am not on talking terms with a realli treasured friend of mine and I was speechless. Unbeknowned to me, I have one less friend when all I thought was we were busy with our own lives and somehow we'll meet up to catch up one day.

I like to assume I'm strong and I dun need support. That Grace is a courageous girl but I'm not. But I won't stop to ponder the 1001 possibilities of what ifs and if onlys. In solitude and the quietness of night, my Daddy God sent forth the word and told me...

"Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you, not as the world gives, do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let it be afraid."- John 14:27

And in my storms, I can only trust Him because I have no more strength left to fight my battles.

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