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If only people have realized this, I probably won't be posting this.

If some of you have realize about "life", about "Terminology" and Philosophy...
The simple way of describing it is...
You break the 'term' down into different area and category, understand each area and category...
then you group them back into the same 'term'...
Not sure if you readers will understand this post but it will be very profound...

(It's like in engineering, initially every machine is so big and functional, and people think that the bigger the machine the more capable the machine is and more function...

Then people try to make the machine smaller in size but of the same function and same performance, by making the chip smaller..

People then start to make smaller size chip with more function and performance...

With more function, people start to make bigger machine with more better functioning chips that is smaller...)

So things is like, from big to small then big again..
Think this through a few time maybe you would probably realize it...
another one...

(When your young, you dream big and everything is possible...

As you grow, you start to learning about your limitation and choices...

you went into more smaller details about this dream you have chosen...

then you starting building your dream bit by bits...

And eventually, you live your dream...)

If you realize, both have something in common...
in the end... i dont know why i'm blogging this post... probably will edit this post again for understanding haha
*unedited yet*

Encouragement and motivation... what's the difference?
Between climbing mountain and settling down with the girl I love just seem equally tempting and difficult to achieve...

But I have to be honest climbing mountain give me the trill as I risk my life to achieve something and often I don't think it is something that I can achieve in Singapore easily, it also best test my limit and capability which I have always wanted to know and also building up my confident...It a kind of sensational achievement that I want to feel before I can settle down and get on with life again... words isn't enough to prove me anything...

I guess I'm just a stubborn head that I don't listen to word easily but instead want to experience it and see it for myself...I have the knowledge but lack the experience...

The girl I have always loved and wanna settle down with is seriously endearing...I can't find word to describe the feeling I had for the past few years...But it seems this lack of confident is really what matters to me a lot..=( I tried to plan event to test myself... but it isn't sensational enough... I went to find more friends so to feel how capable I am... but it fail and instead backfired...when I really seems to lost everything...masochist seem to take over and I want to achieve sometime with physical pain and hard work...

But no one really encouraged me and motivated me to go for mountain scaling ... I'm scared of death as well... I am, of course scared to be alone and lost... but it just seems to be a great and pressuring achievement on myself..

I doubt she would forgive me after so long...

I doubt my ability within this short time before NS...

I doubt so many thing...

And I have a question... should I think so much now or just do what I have initially started...
what come next maybe challenging and with undoubtedly messy...probably I would have more than enough time to think as I scale the Nepal's mountain alone...

I hate junctions...it's always a point of time that I had to made decision which path to take... in fact... I'm still rendering on my previous junctions whether I should make a U-turn... but still I have took this path... would that path I want to take in my previous junction still be open?...I wonder...
Probably, if I make a U-turn now, it would have to cover more distance...but chances are, I might lose both path the I want...

Though I shouldn't get affected by others... but it is really a thought to take =(
cause she really still meant a lot to me... just that... haiz... it's complicated within me...just me...

so many people saying the same thing... so many..........................................................

was doing some stuff with my phone now... then I realize, what the problem with me...

I wouldn't want to settle down till I have achieve something great in life and secure a good degree or PhD/future... this is like a compulsory issue for me before i could really love someone...