Ripples and Sunshine

Why doesn't blogger have a entry password protect function? Roar.

Never mind, I shall create my own. Behold the privacy of a password protected entry!

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So I have my arms wrapped around my bear bear (embracing Sunshine, literally! Isn't that such a sweet thought? ^_^) as I type this entry, and as words and thoughts flow I'm watching and waiting to see where they lead me.

It feels strange to be out every day, but I've done it so frequently these days-- more frequent than I have ever done in all my life thus far, I daresay-- that I find I almost cannot stop. It's clinging on to the last vestiges of everything I've loved and stretching each moment to its maximum... down to every photograph and every comment that keeps me up till 3 at night, just re-living real moments re-captured in virtual reality.

Will I start missing everything with a vengeance once I do grind to a halt? I'm making more outing promises than I ought--my parents have yet to see me at home before 11pm for two consecutive days ever since June began.

Yet meeting Reso and the sisters, the SC girls and Gill and Agl and Wenyi--they are somehow deeply crucial to me. It's almost a wilful relishing of the belief that I need not lose all these in whatever is to come, that a change in lifestyle with the omnipresence of work will not swing my life anywhere else, will not take away my freedom to luxuriate in the presence of who and what I love.

I haven't even begun to wonder what comes next. Today, here, and now, is where I want to be,for as long as I can. And I will live tomorrow when it comes, but not before, not yet.

And thus is each day spent.