This week started out as a bit of an ugly mom week. I found myself exhausted and cranky and yelling at my almost-three-year-old to get down from there, to stop doing that, to put that down. I could hardly keep up.

By Wednesday night I was so done. We usually have parent preschool Thursday mornings, but with a busy weekend ahead, away from my kids, i felt the need to just stay home. My kids were up every two hours in the night (mainly the baby but also the almost-three-year-old) and the first one was up for the day at 5:00 am. So we definitely stayed home. I was dragging and fought to stay patient and keep from yelling. I said my morning prayers a bit late and asked for help. I knew I couldn't get through the day and be the mom I needed to be on my own. And things changed. Not completely and not all at once but I was able to slowly change my thoughts and turn my day around.

I  got my daily cleaning job done and felt good about checking something off my list. I got the girls dressed and did their hair and miracle-of-miracles had a shower! That helped me feel so much better. My sweet five year old did her job of unloading the dishwasher without complaint. My middle child helped a bit too. And the baby went down for a nap so well on her own today. By noon I had fed the kids an early lunch, had supper in the crockpot,  and got my oldest ready for school. Once she was gone, I was able to get my two other girls down for a nap at the same time in the same room successfully and that was a good feeling! I got the house picked up and mopped the floor into my room where I was able to snuggle into my bed for an entire hour and even slept for a bit before crying woke me up. There is nothing like a little catch-up sleep for the sleep-deprived to feel like a new person!

I happily made some cookies for the kids and folded and put away laundry and fed the baby and finished picking up the house, noting how much easier it is since I purged so much from our home in the last few months. I still had a few frustrated moments but the kitchen was cleaned right after supper, we ate a good meal together as a family, the kids got some dad time, and I got the baby out to bed on-time so she wasn't screaming and overtired an hour later. And I got the other two kids out to bed with plenty of snuggles and I was happy and not too tired. I squeezed in some extra snuggles and chatting and just really savoured being a mother tonight. my heart is so full and I am so grateful for His help in turning my "ugly mom week" into a grateful, joyful mom week.

It seems like everyone used to blog, and I loved reading all of those blogs! Now almost no one does. I have lots of things in my head that I want to get out and since no one even reads this, why not here?