Coyne Operated: June 2014

Getting into debt is really easy. Getting out of debt can seem impossible. Staying out of debt is my new mission.

Digging out of debt was one of the most challenging things I’ve ever had to do. I always hated those wallet-sucking credit card payments, car payments, school loans and the like. But it wasn’t until the fall of 2006 that Mike and I decided we’d had enough of handing most of our monthly income over to creditors. It was nearly eight years ago that Mike was diagnosed with his first cancer recurrence after almost three years in the clear. Along with the emotional shock and distress about his physical prognosis, Mike also became acutely aware of our financial predicament. Both of us had brought our own debts into our marriage – as do most people – and together we added to that financial hole. For years we each thought debt was just a normal part of life. After all, everyone has debt, right? Although the majority of people live with debt from credit cards, educational expenses and car purchases, we became tired of seeing our income go out the window. Now, as we faced another bout with cancer, we decided we didn’t want to –and couldn’t – live like everyone else. We wanted to be different.

Shortly after Mike’s re-diagnosis, our friends Jeff and Joyalle gave us a book written by financial guru Dave Ramsey. Dave gives practical yet effective advice on how to chip away at debt and live a life in which your income belongs to you. Mike was immediately fascinated by the book, and he was determined to put us on the path to becoming debt-free. We soon started implementing Dave’s principles. Though it was difficult, especially considering new charges from Mike’s medical treatments, we slowly began chipping away at our debt.

Over the next several years, we worked the plan as best we could. We had moments of backsliding (although we were never “stuff people,” things like eating out were our downfall).We knocked off a student loan here and a car payment there. At the same time, we added to our total debt whenever Mike would go back into treatment, and we suspended the plan during the times Mike would be on disability and we had to watch every penny.

When I lost Mike, we were just a little over $10,000 from achieving our goal of paying off our debt. I immediately paid off the remainder with part of the life insurance payout I received, thus completing our dream. However, the moment we had dreamed about together for so long turned out to be little more than another ho-hum task I managed to find the energy for while in my deep grief. It was a hollow victory. Still, I knew the importance, especially as a young widow, of living on a cash basis and making every incoming dollar my own. I was so blessed to have a wonderful husband who was smart and loving enough to put us on the right track, regardless of the outcome of his health battle.

About six months after losing Mike, I contacted The Dave Ramsey Show to apply for the opportunity to share my debt-free story from the show’s lobby in Nashville, Tennessee. To make our debt-free call from Nashville was the second part of Mike’s dream. The show’s producers responded with some detailed follow-up questions. From there, I put things aside and didn’t bother with completing them for many months. I was too deep in my grief to bother looking up our facts and figures, or looking back through Mike’s budget sheets – which he kept fanatically and in great detail. It was all just too painful, and I often didn’t have the energy or interest to be bothered with it.

Finally, at the end of 2013, I knew I had to complete the last phase of our dream. I contacted the producer again, and although they normally require the debt to have been paid off within the past six months, they made an exception due to my circumstances. I was first scheduled to fly to Nashville and appear on the show on February 14. I thought sharing our story on Valentine’s Day would be an extra special tribute. However, the extreme cold and snowfall resulting from the unexpected polar vortex caused all local flights to be canceled. As a result, I rescheduled my trip for the spring, with Mom S. to accompany and support me. On Friday, April 25, I appeared on the radio show and internet broadcast and shared our story. Dave’s staff was amazing. They were friendly, warm and made me feel completely at ease. I was more relaxed than I thought I would be, considering the fact that millions of people were listening to the show. Donning my Coyne MPC shirt, I told our tale of how Mike put us on this path and how much debt we were able to get rid of, despite our obstacles. It helped me to focus on Dave himself, treating the experience like a one-on-one conversation, as I could see him broadcasting from behind glass, directly across from me. Despite the emotional subject matter, I was able to hold it together, while many others in the lobby with me – staff and onlookers combined – were sniffling and wiping their eyes. Afterwards, I got to meet Dave, who signed our “Total Money Makeover” book as well as the budget sheets Mike kept. I also took a photo with Dave and signed their “debt-free wall.” They gave me complimentary t-shirts, mugs and bumper stickers. I was even invited to join the staff for dinner when they come to New York in October.

The entire interview can be viewed here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6SinIlZAlzw http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6SinIlZAlzw

Once the show was over, and I could breathe a sigh of relief and relax, the rest of the vacation began. Having never been to Nashville before, I couldn’t wait to get a taste of music city and lap up every ounce of country twang I could. Mom and I got out and took in a bit of everything. We ate dinner in a small, out-of-the way eatery serving good Southern cookin’. We had cocktails and listened to John England and the Western Singers at Nashville Palace, where I got to meet and have my picture taken with country fiddler Gene “Pappy” Merritts. We did some shopping at various souvenir shops (where I paid cash, of course) and I bought an authentic cowgirl hat. We got a glimpse of Broadway on a Saturday night. We walked through and dined at the enormous and opulent Gaylord Opryland Resort & Convention Center, which features indoor waterfalls, trees, flowers and even a river. And a trip to Nashville is never complete without a visit to the Grand Ole Opry. We took the backstage tour where we got to see the dressing rooms used by the biggest names in country music. We saw the artists’ post office boxes within the Opry. And, we got to stand on the very stage where the greatest of the greats have performed.

Although the entire experience was bittersweet, at least I know I completed something Mike worked so hard to see through. I have to tell myself Mike knows the magnificent accomplishment he made. Thanks to him, I am not facing a future plagued with needless expenses. For that reason, to Mike, I will always be indebted.