Last year, our hearts were pulled to go to Peru on a mission trip. We weren't exactly sure why. I'm sure when asked, we gave a pretty good explanation. Something like, "I love children." "I want to show Jesus to those who need Him." or "I just feel called to do more." All of these are great reasons to go serve and show God's love. This year, as I was contemplating why I was returning, things were much different.
In 2011, I went to Peru just knowing that God had 'something' bigger for me. I wasn't sure what that vague 'something' was. We were excited and expecting our third child. Life was good. And I couldn't ask for anything else. It was my turn to give.
Well, anyone who has ever been on a mission trip knows that you somehow end up receiving more than you give. Somehow the rolls reverse, and you become the receiver as well as the giver. Oddly enough, I didn't know exactly how much I had received until I returned.
We went to Peru last year blind. Or maybe the word is naive. Unfamiliar with the hurts of this world. Distanced from pain. The pain that causes you to search, question, and completely depend on God. We didn't even have a chance to begin to process our week in Peru last year until we were hit in the face with our own
pain. The only thing we knew for sure was we had fallen in love with the children of Segrada Familia and that God was working in that place.
So, as we talked about returning or not, there were a lot of things on my heart. This trip marked the beginning of a year of pain like I had never known before. But it also marked a year of God like I had never known. I knew there would be a certain kind of pain in returning. Pain of what I should have, of remembering last year, of seeing abandoned children, and of telling our story all over again. So while I questioned whether or not I wanted to go back, I knew I HAD to go back. This year, I knew without a doubt why I was going to Peru...HOPE.
I have hope. I have the best kind of hope, the hope in Jesus Christ. The hope in knowing I will be with Him for eternity. That He loves me, died for me, and will never leave me. And when my world was falling in around me, that hope was all I had to hold on to. When I thought about the children thousands of miles away that I had fallen in love with last year, I suddenly felt a deep sense of longing. A longing for each and every one of them to know and feel the same hope I have. Because how can you survive a life that many of them have without the hope of Jesus?
