Lately there has been a lot of controversy on whether or not spanking is abusive. it has always been an area of concern as we did our fair share of spanking back in the day. Tyra and Dr Phil has had recent shows on concerning this issue and i found them quite informative.
so i have been trying to learn more about it.
What does "spare the rod spoil the child" really mean?
here are quotes from the research i have been doing.

"...In the 23rd Psalm we read, “Your rod and your staff comfort me.” We may rightfully assume that the rod of a shepherd is at least similar in type and use to that in the proverb that was mentioned earlier…spare the rod, spoil the child. it can also refer to the word of God being the iron rod. I can not accept that God is telling us to hit his precious child with a rod for heaven sake!

I’ll be the first to admit that I’ve heard variations of this proverb used by both clergy and laity alike to justify corporal punishment, but the use of the rod by shepherds did not generally include beating the sheep. The fact is, the rod and staff were the two implements utilized by professional shepherds of the day. The staff, which we are most familiar with, has a “crook” or “hook” on the end which was used to stop running sheep, help pull sheep up from rocky places when they’d fallen over, and so on. The rod was used when corralling the sheep to insure they went in the direction they were supposed to go. It wasn’t used to prod or poke, but to direct along the length of the shaft.

Children are no less valuable than sheep, and they learn better too! If a sheep is consistency directed, that is limited and taught, they will learn what is expected and generally conform. However, if they are beaten and broken they not only stop responding, but they look for every opportunity to escape–even when escape may mean grave danger.

To “spare the rod” is indicative of a parent who does not discipline their child, that is, to teach, guide, and direct. This is the parent who “hates their child.”as refered to in Proverbs 13:24 which reads, “Those who spare the rod, hate their children, but the one who loves their child disciplines them diligently.” To spare the rod doesn’t mean a parent should hit or beat down their children into submission, rather they are to be like shepherds who value and care for their charges and keep them from danger by using the tools of good parenting to teach responsible behavior and appropriate morality in line with the teachings of the word of God."

here is what Dr Phil has to say about the subject that I found interesting.

January 5th, 2010 by Dr. Phil
To Spank or Not to Spank?

On two of our shows this week, we have what I think, is an intelligent and thought-provoking debate about an age-old question: To spank or not to spank. Big question, and one that the answer to can have a profound and lasting impact on your child. I have seen surveys that tend to be split, with about half of parents believing if you spare the rod, you spoil the child, and the other half saying no way does it make sense to hit your kid.

Not one to waffle around on issues, I won’t hesitate to weigh in with my opinion: I believe spanking genuinely confuses children. I believe they think to themselves something like, ”OK, let me get this right. You are supposed to love me, nurture me and protect me from harm, and now you are standing there, five times my size, and hitting me and inflicting physical pain? Hmmm … I don’t get it.”

Will spanking suppress behavior in the short term? Yes. Does it teach a lesson that can be internalized and used later in the form of self-discipline? I don’t think so, and even if it does, it’s highly inefficient compared to other options. And is it really wise to teach children that hitting is OK?

I got spanked once, and I am still mad about it! HA! In the sixth grade, I snuck off to swim in a pond about 10 miles from our house in the foothills of the Rocky Mountains in Colorado. No supervision and lucky someone didn’t drown! When asked about it, I started to lie and deny doing it. Even though I was young, and based on my choices at the time, pretty stupid, I quickly realized, mid-lie, that I was standing there with bloodshot eyes and a good case of swimmer’s ear. It wouldn’t have taken MacGyver to figure out what I’d been doing, so I just ‘fessed up — not because it was the right thing, but because I was busted, and I knew it.

My father spanked me. I “got” the stupidity of what I had done and didn’t need to be hit to solidify that knowledge. It wasn’t the physical pain, because honestly, it was a pretty wimpy and half-hearted whuppin’. It was the indignity of it and the sense of betrayal I felt. If anything, it made me feel righteous, defiant and rebellious (I felt the relationship I thought we had was now, in my opinion, violated, which to my 12-year-old brain meant I owed him nothing going forward. It was every man for himself! (Sooo, I have the bias of personal experience, but I confessed it, so don’t hit me!)


So i have to ask myself "what effect would this method of disapline have on a small, innocent child who is just learning to trust and find himself, his worth and explore the world around him?

it would have been nice to have these helps back then when we felt like we were basically on our own trying to figure it all out!

RULES:1. Put your MP3 player, iTunes, on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS.
4. Tag at least 10 friends (make me #11 so I can see your results).
5. Everyone tagged has to do the same thing.
6. Have Fun!

IF SOMEONE SAYS 'ARE YOU OKAY' YOU SAY?
Yesterday Once More
HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOURSELF
If You Get There Before I Do
WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
Beautiful Savior! cool!
HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
From God's Arms...he has truely held me through the last 3 weeks!!!
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE
Triumphant Entry...from Hosanna! it represents Christ's purpose on earth!!
WHAT'S YOUR MOTTO?
The Little Girl...I guess to see the inner soul of a child
WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Allelluia!!! :) Awesome!
WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
I Need Thee Every Hour...wow this is really true! I always sing this about them!
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
To Where You are/Josh Grobin...definately! wow
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Banana Pancakes...LOL this is unreal!
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
For Once In My Life...oh man this is killing me!
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
no way!!!! Big Star!!! soooooo funny
WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Gira Con Me...ok, I WAS on a roll...its by Grobin...who knows what it means, but I'm sure its beautiful??
WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
The Good Stuff
WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?(HAHAHAHA)
All Creatures of Our God and King...Alleluia
WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
These Days...hmm?
WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST FEAR?
God Bless America... the future condition of our world is my biggest fear/God's judgements etc
WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Stand By Me??
WHAT DO YOU WANT RIGHT NOW?
We'll Bring the World His Truth...I really do want to go on a mission!
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Oh NO!!! i just cant say it!!! lol!!!!!!
oh please let me cheat!
ok ok i'll be fair and honest!
"I'm your man" ahhhhhhhhhhhh!!!! i had to strike out at the end!
I havent even heard it before...Derek downloaded some Michael Buble for me...how funny!
WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
Renegade 2

And then there were Two...MoRe!



Me and Chloe have our Birthdays side by side.

I had so many candles on my cake it looks like

we had an explosion!

In case you are wondering what in the heck

I am doing with my arms, I was "flapping" them

to try and get enough breath to blow out ALL those candles!

WHEW!!!








I think Chloe is wondering if that fire is dangerous.



She had a great time opening her gifts!

Blake and Amanda gave

her a cool princess pak with a cool cell phone and

she got makeup with a little

cute bag. She kept coming to me to help her put it in

her "purse" and then she would slip it

onto her arm with a very femine flare, cross her arms and

walk away to show it off. It was so cute!

She had princess shoes too and when she tried to

walk on the tile her feet would slide out.

It was hilarious! (clip below)




Just loving being a Nana! Auklin is growing so fast!

I hardly get to see him due to Chelsi working

at home and me not having a car. :(