Diabetic Dumb Dumb

5 years between posts.  What have I been doing?  Mostly, I've been trying to keep busy so I won't notice how my children are growing.  But, despite my efforts, it is clearly evident that they are growing and my time with them here at home is disappearing.  That's why my blog is lacking in interest.  I've been too interested in life.  But, I will enjoy these pics when I look back in another 5 years and I hope you do too.  It'd be nice if it included the last 5 years, but it's only the last year...
Took a trip to Yellowstone last summer.  Love that place!
Holly is so amusing!  She knows just how to pose for the camera.

What would a trip be without some selfies?
We hiked Mt. Timpanogos in September.  Matthew and I made it to the top, despite our issues with vertigo.  Why is it always worse on the way up than on the way down?

Recitals.  Always ready to be done hearing that piece by the time they play it, but I love how a recital motivates them to practice. 
This was a wedding reception for my niece.  There was dancing and when I looked over, I found Matthew and Holly dancing together.  Matthew was helping in the kitchen making slush...thus the apron.
Cousins came to visit from Texas and we took them on the Adams Canyon hike.  It was longer than we thought, but worth the falls at the end.
Porter family campout...hair-styling chain.

First day of school.  Can't wait until the last day now.
The girls and I went to the Women's session of General Conference together at the Conference Center.  We got to go again this spring because no one else wanted the tickets.  Crazy people!
Biztown.  Owen had a great day!

Disneyland for my 40th birthday!  Can it get any better?
Dancing after Christmas Eve dinner. 
Gangsta' faces...
Holly & Owen showing off their ballroom dance moves.  They are really great partners.
Owen was Shrek in the school play.  It was a lot of work and a lot of fun!
I know I'm biased, but I think these girls are the most beautiful ever!
This is what happens when you discover you don't have a 3 candle and it's Easter Sunday (as well as Holly's birthday).  She and I had a good laugh over it.


Last night we went biking on the Lagoon Trail.  Only problem was that on Saturday and Sunday we had one of our big wind storms.  It was more of an obstacle course than a quick trail to ride on.

Went to Lake Powell with one of our favorite families, the Nielsons, right after school got out.  We got caught in a rain/hailstorm after we hiked to this beautiful arch.  Thankfully, we were safe and it was an adventure!

Yellowstone pics again...I think that hike to Mt. Washburn is one of my favorites.  Beautiful!

Holly ran for student council office at Fairfield.  This was one of her pics.  #hatchtag was her slogan.  She won!
This is why I do all the stuff I do all day everyday.  I really do have great kids!

Thought I'd throw in some pics of the hikes that made me so bitter at this dumb disease.  The hikes were fun, the diabetes never is.  One day I'll figure out how to format pics on this blog, but until then, we'll all just live with my ignorance and results of it...
Yes, in case you were wondering...my blood sugar was low.  Any pic from that hike and I can say for certain, my blood sugar was low.

 All these pics are from our Druid Arch hike in Canyonlands.  It was about 11 miles round trip, but a fantastic hike.  Had a little of everything...scrambling, climbing, level walking, interesting features to get through, even a ladder to climb.  Someday I'd like to do it again.

That's what diabetes is...relentless.  I think that is what bothers most of us in the end.  Anyone can do anything for a short period of time.  But diabetes just keeps dishing it out.  It's been a rough month.  It's only been rough because I thought I was the one in charge of this disease and it keeps coming around to remind me that I am at its mercy.  Please don't misunderstand that statement.  I am the one in charge.  But, as every diabetic can attest, there are times that despite my best efforts, diabetes doesn't act predictably.  Perhaps that's the only predictable thing about it...that it's unpredictable.  I've had this disease for almost 30 years.  That should be plenty of time for anyone to become an expert.  I do feel like I know a whole lot about it, but just as I am ever-changing, so is it.

Last month Mike and I went to Arches National Park and Canyonlands and had a get-away sans children.  It was so nice to be away from all of the household pressures and demands and have time to remind myself why I do all the things I do.  And time to enjoy the relationship Mike and I have.  Too bad I couldn't leave the diabetes behind.  We really enjoy hiking and we did a lot of it.  We spent one day in Arches and hiked to Delicate Arch and enjoyed some beautiful arches in the Windows district.  The hike to Delicate Arch is hardly considered a strenuous hike.  It is only 3 miles round-trip.  I do that sort of mileage everyday when I go out to walk/run.  The way my blood sugar was acting, however, you would have thought I was really being pushed to my limits.  I treated low blood sugar 5 times on the hike.  What would have typically been an easy push for Mike and me was peppered with frequent stops to try and let my blood sugar catch up.  I was completely exhausted at the end of the hike.  The memory of the experience is clouded by the haze I was in (low blood sugar really messes with your brain).  I learned a few things that day and the next day, when we hiked Druid Arch in Canyonlands, was a much better experience.  But I still had a clear message that Diabetes likes to be in the driver's seat.

I have to find the good things and here's the good thing about diabetes.  I am humbled by it constantly.  I am ever reminded that I can only do so much.  I cannot ignore it or hope it goes away or starts to behave.  It won't.  Though I can't predict everything about it, I can work to learn as much as I can and try everyday to make it a little better.  Most importantly, however, is the constant reminder that I depend upon the Lord and my Savior.  Diabetes keeps me grounded and reminds me that even when I think I am calling the shots, I am not.  Life is like that.  There is only so much we can truly control in our lives and the trick is learning to accept responsibility for what we can control and learn to endure what we cannot.  But not just endure with toleration, but endure with grace.  We've all seen people who have mastered that art.  I'd like to say I have, but diabetes constantly reminds me I have a long way to go.

In the spirit of enduring with grace, I have learned a few more things about diabetes recently and how it acts in my body.  It's getting better.  I started on the Dexcom G5 (continuous glucose monitoring) 3 months ago and I love it.  It's one more piece of information that is making some things a little less confusing.

For the past couple of weeks I've been able to exercise without fighting the low blood sugar.  I'm not seeing much of a high rebound after exercise either.  It's not without its imperfections (just a few days ago, I started out with a higher blood sugar than usual and much to my dismay it spiked to near 300 as I exercised), but it is making more sense and therefore becoming a little more predictable.  I won't always be able to anticipate all the swings, but I think I'll be able to anticipate most of them.  One way or another, I can't stop trying and fighting.  Diabetes is relentless.  The only way to respond is to be equally relentless in my resolve to master it.  

Is 8 months too long between posts? I didn't think so...what's kind of funny about that is that I've been to my blog to 'update' it a few times but once I got past changing the background (because for some reason snowflakes in April bother me), I was no longer motivated to do anything else...you, know, like something substantial like adding a post.

I'm smart enough to know that I can't possibly try to catch up on 8 months of life (although it's possible that I may opt to throw out a few highlights later) in a few simple posts. So, I think (translate, I hope) that I will update with some pics and "news" in the next week or so.

In the mean time, I just wanted to say that I think I'm a fad-follower. I know what you are thinking, "Jen, you've never struck me as the fad-following type." True, I'm not into trendy fashions, the hottest read (although I am #408 on the wait list at the library for The Hunger Games), the hippest music, the latest movie, or the newest electronic gadget. However, I have noticed an interesting trend or 'fad' that I have been a part of. It is namely this...blogging. As I've flipped through my friends' and relatives' blogs, I've noticed I'm not the only one who is blogging less than they used to. I may not have blogged for 8 months, but I'm not the only one. I can point to many people who haven't posted for 2-3 months, a few more for 4-8 months, and dare I say it?--yes, even a few that haven't blogged for longer than me (you know who you are!). What was once novel, fresh, and exciting, is now too much effort, too hard to catch up on, and too time-consuming. I don't know that this is a bad thing...hopefully our efforts have switched from blogging to paying more attention to our families, friends, and neighbors (I admit, it's an optimistic thought). Blogging is a great thing and certainly serves a purpose, but just like any good thing, too much time and effort can rob us of the what really matters. I can feel I'm beginning to babble...

Anyway, as much as I hate to admit it, I'm a fad-follower. And like the rest of you fad-followers, real life has taken over. Much as I still like to blog and love to catch up with everyone else at their blogs, life demands my attention. Much as I don't like to be too trendy, I hope I will make some more time for this fad in the near future. Happy blogging!

January is here with its seemingly endless barrage of winter ickiness...inversion, inversion, inversion...sick kids, sick me, sick husband...winter snows (actually winter snows don't bother me so much as long as I don't have to go anywhere in it--it's better than the inversions anyway). One thing I do enjoy about January is the fact that everything seems to crawl compared to December. After the whirlwind of birthdays, Christmas, anniversary, family parties, ward parties, school parties, and fun, fun, fun (not to mention the Primary craziness of prepping for a new year), it's kind of nice to slow down and have very few commitments. When January started I was really ambitious to get a lot of household organization and cleaning projects done. I think I have gotten exactly 3 done (laundry room, files sorted, and new pics on the wall) and now my ambition has diminished significantly. After having time to accomplish some of the organization, now I am craving time to do the 5 or so sewing projects that have been started and not finished. On the bright side, Holly's doll clothes are almost finished (this was a project that was supposed to be done in time for Christmas (snicker, snicker! I honestly think that is my biggest failing...being just slightly late on everything--I'll probably be just a little late for the resurrection--sigh).

I've been so busy with the usual December Christmas rush...it wasn't enough to have 2 birthdays and Christmas in one month, Mike and I were dumb enough to add an anniversary too (it's today...13 years!). I'll give a better update later, but here's some new family pics.












Love this one of the kids...Brooklyn just looks bewildered to be there with all those strange people around her. Never realized how good Holly was at that face.

More about the last 1/3 of my year later (can't believe I haven't posted since September)...I think I finally have some time to give to it:)