getting stuff done: creating my life

Be true to your self not what others expect of you.Dont work too hard
Express your feelings (no bottling them up!!)
Nurture your friendships
Let yourself be happy
Be silly and laugh
Discover more
Play the hand you are dealt as well as you are able
take responsibility
Conquer your struggles
Be proud of how you live your life
Love sincerely
Write your own life story...

Asteya is one of the five Yamas. And if you are into Yoga you might know that the Yamas and Niyamas are guidelines for living, set out by Pantanjali in his Yoga Sutras.  Asteya means, literally, non-stealing.

As my Yoga school homework last week (oh actually it might have been the week before, I am a bit behind in my homeworks!) We had to verbally commit to Asteya everyday and write up our experiences.  With reference to -  yogic things like "moving in and letting go"  and "resistance.

It has been interesting. Initially I found it all slightly irrelevent (my resistance?) as I am not one to steal stuff.  But that is just the surface of it.  Another interpretation of Asteya is "not taking that which is not freely given" which is a little deeper.  It can apply to asana practice, as in not going too far into a pose, forcing the body into it.  Or it can mean something like, not taking the piss, hogging someone's time or attention, or taking more than you need at an eat all you want restaurant.  Also there is this idea that if you are not fully present you are stealing from yourself.  That being distracted, not giving your full attention to what is happening right now, or falling into worry about the future, or regret about the past, takes away from the fullness of pleasure in the moment,  which is all that truly exists.....

And then there was this; stealing reveals an underlying belief that you do not have enough already.  That there is lack.  That we must take what we can because there might not be more.  We are afraid of being without what we need.  We have no faith or belief in abundance.

And there for me it got more interesting.  Last week was meant to be a whole week of catching up with myself.  I had lots of admin, and tasks that I had been putting off while I had been busy.  You know, I knew this 'empty' week was on its way, no visitors, no going to London for work.... time to do all the things I hadn't been able to do.... But then we had a snow day, and Bub's school was closed.  And I lost 7 hours.  And then Hub was really ill, and that threw us all too as he was not functioning fully in the running of the household.  And somehow last week, instead of being this vast stretch of time to catch up on myself, it became me just about managing to do what was really crucial and little else.  At least it felt like that.

About half way through last week I suddenly realised that this "not having enough time" was a belief - a lack of trust in abundance - and that it was Asteya to feel that way.  So instead I began to practice a belief in abundance.  And say to myself, "I have plenty of time available".  Its true I didn't finish some stuff.  But it didn't matter. Nothing fell apart.  I did what was needed.  All was fine.  And today I read this.  I love it! "Actually, I am not that busy"!  Wow.  YES! 

So I come out of that week more aware, able slow down, and give attention to the present moment.  I feel released from this fearful striving, that it is all race to get somewhere when all I need is here already.  I am enough.  There is plenty of time. 

Dear Universe, you have been properly briliant of late.  Am loving how you are helping me along.  I have another request.  I have been talking cameras for a while.  And I am really getting itchy feet about getting a good one.  So I need this; the money to buy one.  A camera such as I desire will cost approximately £150 for the body and max £300 for the lens.  That is £450 of camera equipment.  Possibly slightly less if I can find a bargain.  But I need to find and EXTRA £450 for this purchase.  Can you help me out here? I can do work for it! or I can just win it somehow? Or magic it into my life!  It needs to be extra to what I have already please.  Thank you so much. 

Hum, and other than that and our house being ill last week. And snow days and illness disrupting and upending plans and making every thing feel late and underprepared......

It will be find.  There is enough  time.  There is always enough time/ 

I am very glad that I did go on a mono printing workshop on Sunday.  Making art sure is my happy place.....

I think I mentioned serendipity a few posts ago.... just off to see if I did (...oh, ...not exactly, but I did write this) .  But I should a done.  I certainly mentioned the new camera.

I was advised to go and have a play with one... you knowto get the feel of it.  SO... today at a child's 5th birthday party, I spied a lady with a camera, looking decidedly familiar to the one I posted about.  So I went to ask her about it. Yes it was a Nikon D80.  It was her husbands and he was more than happy to chat photography with me.  And he might be selling his.  And did I want to have a play and take some photos?  Yes please!  He also told me that the D90 which has video on it (hmmmm - that could be even better!), and yes the lens I talked about would make all the difference.....  And had I heard about Lightworks (I did write it down, I think that is what he said) and if anytime I wanted to be shown how lightworks or talk photography he would be well up for it.  He had studied photography at college, but never took it any further, but loved taking photographs and talking about it.

Very cool.  I got to play with a D80 and I have a mentor already.  With a copy of lightworks he is happy to share.  And from whom I might be able to buy said camera........  (although maybe the D90 with video as well would be even cooler!)

I love serendipity.
I love how you put it out the the universe and the universe responds.
Its probably got some practical down to earth explanations. But I like the magic of it. 

So yesterday I got all excited and determined and wishful for a proper camera.  And I reached out and asked for some advice.  I am delighted to say that I got some advice and it is truly good. For it came from a lady who takes truly stunningly exquisite photos (see here)  I wanted to know what camera to get.  But I also learnt a trick.  A camera can be decent, but what makes the difference is the lens.......

So my mission now is more specific.  I need to go to a camera shop and test out a few - well, Nikon or Canon ones, to see which feels right in my hand.... and it doesn't have to be the most amazing camera. But then I buy it without the lens.  And I buy a 50 mm 1.4 lens. 

Its good to know.  One day soon.  It will  be mine.....

copyright Madelyn Mulvaney

(I am deeply grateful to the beautiful spirit Madelyn Mulvaney for her support and wisdom)

Dear Universe.  Thank you so much for what you have already given me.  I am truly lucky.  I was wondering, I want some stuff.  Do you think you could somehow help make it happen??

I want to have a proper camera.  and to be able to take proper grown up beautiful proper photos.  I love my iphone but its so goddam blurry.  I would like to have the abilty to take beautiful photographs. And to know how to wield a decent camera  to do do. 

AND I want to know how to make beautiful images in photoshop.  And to create designs and stuff.  I want this. 

Its good to want things sometimes, yes,  and to know what you want. 

I don't want a silly big camera that is too unwieldy or silly expensive to schlep about the place easily.  I want something nifty, decent and capable. 

I also want someone who is able to take beautiful photographs to come to our event at Christmas and take photos that capture the beauty of it. 

There.  Thanks. 

image from http://coffeepotandkettle.wordpress.com/2010/10/13/treacle-co-hove/

I had a meeting this morning with my artist friend Crimbo.  We are hatching plans for a couple of Christmas events (and other and more arty crafty creative activities going forward onward and upward)  I am deeply excited to hear that she is totally on the same page with regard to the importance and essence of what we want to create.  That Art can help you find yourself and lose yourself at the same time,  of sharing the wonderfulness that being in the flow of creative activity brings.  How it lifts you up.  Makes everything better.   And she loves the name Make: Do.  And indeed  Make: Believe......

I believe in manifestation.  Or  - that, it IS POSSIBLE to make your dreams come true.  I guess this makes me what they call a Possibilitarian.

I believe, if you start writing things down, creating in your imagination,  AND you start taking teeny steps towards them, you create reality. This was why I started writing my blog.  It is actually common sense.  But I am in love with the idea of it being magical.  I love magic.  I love that real life can be truly miraculous.

A few weeks ago I wrote about my dream art workshops.  I wrote about it, in a 'working it out as I wrote it' kind of way  - you can read it  here if you want

 And what I love is that Crimbo read it, and it inspired her.  It made her want to meet up with me to talke about it.  And the writing of it, became part of the reason we met and devised real actual plans. 

I love that my dream casting ramblings hit a mark (or two) and are starting to sprout baby shoots that will grow into reality.

And the best bit is how easy it all was.  I was stuck. I wrote and worked out some ideas.  I met up with a friend at one of Brightons loveliest cafes  - the wonderful Treacle of Hove  - ate delicious cake, chatted at length - and came up with a plan.  

The last best bit?  Crimbo knows all about Photoshop.  Photoshop is on my list of things to learn.  And she is going to teach me. We are going to need to devise fabulous flyers!!

SO  - what ARE those plans?  (at least in part...)

Our Christmas plan is to host a series of workshops where you get to Make: Christmas (see how that works?)  Make handmade cards, Make decorations, Make wrapping paper.  (I am a firm believer that we Make our own magic ) We will provide  inspiration, materials and a glass of something nice (we are thinking a Chistmassy cocktail might do the trick? ) in a beautiful room in the centre of Brighton.  4 hours of creative play in creative company.  A launch pad to Making your  Christmas 2013 really magical.    Very excited.  Watch this space........

so its been a week of eating super healthy foods and tonics and kale and beetroot and avocado and pomegranate and spinach and mackeral and so on and so forth, with no coffee and little tea, and hardly any wheat, and less dairy and all the things you are sposed to eat and sposed to not eat plus vitamins and iron and everything. 

And today I feel a bit better.  HURRAH.  I am up. Its PAST TEN O'CLOCK!! whoop whoop.  No sore throat, no earache, and best best BEST of all.  I am not utterly exhausted.  And asleep at 8pm.

Mind you, had better not over do it.  Am off to have a (herbal) tea and read ma easy book (Game of Thrones) before sleep time.

It was only on the 20th February I wrote about feeling low on energy (see here) and so its kind of embarrassing to be back in exactly the same position here again.  And no I did not manage to give up wheat, or caffeine.  In fact the last couple of days I have gone the opposite and used caffeine and chocolate to boost me to keep going.  Yes bad move.  Of course it doesn't work.  Tonight I was sposed to be watching Skyfall.  but am too tired.  its a bit ridiculous.  Hub is getting fed up with it.  I am too.  I slept 10 hours last night, and I felt fine this morning.  And then just about tea time my energies ran out and I started to feel pants again.  And I have been sent to bed to 'get better'.  I was meant to be going to a Yoga morning tomorrow. But I am not at all sure its a good idea.  Hub reckons I should stay in bed tomorrow to see if I can get better.

I think I am going to have to stop with the caffeine.  I may try the wheat free, though the sore throat thing indicates its not really an allergy thing.  But I may try it anyway.  We have curry for tomorrow and soups.  I haven't had a day in bed for a very very long time.  Perhaps it will help.  I hope so.  Hub has made me promise to go to the docs on Wednesday, so I will. But I doubt there will be anything they can do, or know.  Still.  I will go anyway.

And I really am going to try caffeine free.  At least no coffee anyway.  I did have 2 really strong cups today.....

Sorry to be such a repetitive old whinger.  But there you go.  Its 8.45pm and I really am going to go to sleep soon.

I remember Teesha Moore saying that saying you are not feeling well, over and over, is not the way to get better.  So, Teesha, sorry for the whinge above.  As of now I am going to do the following

I am WELL.  I am full of energy.  I am healthy and feeling GOOD.

I am eating nourishing foods and I am looking after myself properly.  x