getting stuff done: creating my life

Am musing on the different energies of "abundance" and "frugality" and how to balance them.

from http://mamabake.com/2014/01/03/frugal-frannie-a-frugal-new-year/

I first discovered blogging when I was suddenly without income, and I found the whole frugal blogosphere, which had excellent advice.  And - having done some "money work" as the Californians call it, I have over the years looked at my "money story".  I know that frugality features high in mine.  And not in a dire way, in fact, for me, its a creative thing, a clever thing and indeed for one of my most powerful money stories, learning to manage on my own by becoming deeply frugal, it is a deeply empowering, stride for indepence and self actualisation thing.  It's what I reach for in times of trouble and I find it weirdly soothing.  I guess its a little like dieting for anorexic.  Hmm that is perhaps an extreme.   But I do feel its a way for me to find control.  You know, like everything else is crazy - but I can budget!!

from http://www.prolificliving.com/money-affirmations/

So, the other side of the story is that,  in many money books especially some of the new agey type things where you know, "your thoughts create your reality" , this love of frugality is a sort of bad thing -  because according to them, you are setting yourself up for a life of needing to penny pinch!! And worse, because I sort of enjoy it, and find it creative and empowering, I seek it out, or manifest it in my life.  And it can be seen as mean and reductive, the opposite of expansive and abundant.  And I do like to feel expansive and abundant  -well doesn't anyone. 

So then I have the other side of the  another pattern.  And I  will treat my self to new clothes, and extravagantly expensive holidays.... all this will be followed and preceded by belt tightening and frugal fussing over pennies.  I'll spend a few months buying food at Abel and Cole, hiring a cleaner and eating out.  And then to flip it and move back into frugality mode. 

So that's my pattern.  I'm financially bulimic, to use another unhealthy metaphor.   Ha!


As you can imagine, I am aiming to move away from the story of either anorexic or bulimic. I know they are just stories, or metaphors - but neither are very jolly, or balanced or grown up or - most importantly, neither of them are healthy. 

This is one of the reasons I really liked Bari Tessler's The Art of Money - because it gave a wider perspective on the money stories.  And a kind one.  (Her approach is so very kind.  How lovely!)  I am well aware that I picked up the joy of being frugal from events in my past.  Perhaps my extravagance too (another story?).  But - the good thing is -  its not all bad.  What I am looking to do now, is integrate, know that they are both stories, and choose what I can take forward from both.  Maybe create a new story.  

I learned some very useful skills from that frugal past.  I am absolutely able to have a great life on a budget and to me this feels its like a creative game.  And I learned how to budget and run cash flows.  All of these are good things. 

As for extravagance, its never hurt me really badly.  And because of this balance I have been able to have nice tech, and I have travelled to exciting places like India, Iceland and San Francisco.  I have been on art retreats, learned to teach yoga - and I have some very lovely shoes....  and some very lovely bedlinen.  (I think if I were a multi billionaire, beds and bed linen would be an obsession!) 

So Balance!! . I am using my skills that serve me, and we are learning to manage our budget, to know where we are, and to practice wise spending, and to be creative about entertainment where we can, not stress about some expenses, even if they are 'extravagant' because its good to feel extravagant sometimes.

There is more to this story - of course! ha!  With money - its not just the spending of it - there is also the earning of it. But that would make this an in ordinately long post.    X Namaste Y'all!! xxx

Ah.  Sorry for the "despair" drama yesterday.  Not really despair.  Just hormones.  Its always good to have that explaination.  And I am always relieved, then faintly sheepish that this is all it was.  But mostly relieved.  Am not heading for some sort of depressive episode that will last forever.  Hurrah!

And I even woke up feeling positive about the work I need to get done in the time I have available.   I think I will skip out of the house though.  I have discovered that if I am here there are an awful lot of things that just need a little bit of help.  And refusing often offends!

Ah, had a lovely weekend.  Went to Kew Botanical Gardens to meet up with old friends (and their families) folk I have known for more than 25 years.  Oh how can that be!! It was sublime the weather perfect  -sunny with a breeze and sitting in the shade with the wide lawns and giant trees, eating strawberries and sipping prosecco.  Yes please.

Then today we went to visit more friends and had a European buffet (lots of dishes from around Europe) in - honour - of Europe and Europeans. With many French and Italians present.  Sigh.  Again lovely weather, not too hot, not too cold, and unusually on time train travel to boot.

I am  - if I am honest - still feeling deeply sad.  I don't really know why.  Perhaps it is hormonal, or post Brexital.  Or just some unknown reason.  If I stop, around the edges, I feel a slight creeping despair.  No reason for it.  Its just there.  I am writing about it, to lessen it.  I don't want to take it at all seriously or dwell on it too much.  But there we are.  I guess we all feel this sometimes.  No I am not even going to write this. 

Ah, Yes I am.  Its not like a full blown thing.  But something I am somewhat fighting off.  LIke a cold you ward off with lots of garlic and vitamin C and echinachea and all.  Perhaps it will, like a cold, happen regardless and all that must really happen is to go with it and let it pass.  As colds do.  They just come and then they go again and there aint much else you can do but rest up and bear with it. 

My major success of the day was to work out how to fix a very annoying error message in a PC laptop I have the use of to screen grab stuff for the e-learning course modules I am working on.  GOD computers can be frustrating.  And yet - I perservered and I managed to get the damn thing to send emails and unlock the unhelpful error message that was repeating and repeating for some very unknown reason!

So there's a good thing.  Another good thing is that we have found a sitter for the guinea pigs while we are away. When I say "we"......    I am  - probably because I am feeling grumpy anyway - feeling very grumpy that "I have to do everything around here".  Which never goes down well.  And which makes me feel even more grumpy.  Grumpy is definitely a vicious circle....

My grumpy be over very soon please.  Thank you.  

I went to sleep at about 9pm last night.  And woke up  - well - depressed.  Honestly its the only way to describe how I feel.  That, or just really sad and on the edge of tears.  It could well be hormonal.  So hopefully its that and it will pass.

The other thing is the state of the world.  One of the reasons I decided to leave Facebook alone for a while was because of the endless policital anger, outrage and despair that is plastered all over it since the Brexit fiasco.  And now the labour party fiasco.  And meanwhile we have a primeminster no one voted for and it seems no opposition.  Its chaotic and I have to say I have no faith in the conversative government to make decisions about things I care about in ways that I feel will help the country.  I feel that we are being lied to and they will be going ahead with the dismantling of the NHS and the academisation of schools regardless of anything I or anyone else can do about it.  But that they will say they are doing what is best for the country.   And then there is Trump.  Jesus what a scary prospect that is.  He's just awful.  And yet, people seem to believe that he is 'standing up for America' or some such.  And on a really local level, the trains - Southern Trains are not managing the network.  I don't agree with Franchising off the national rail, and i believe it is the government that should ensure that the infrastructure of the country just WORKS. They just cancel trains, have commuters packed in like cattle and running slow in the 30 degree heat.  God knows.  What is the world coming to. 

And I snuck back on to facebook, because - i am probably an addict - and also because there are some nice things there too.  Like my cousin's visit to the UK and Michelle Obama doing car pool kareoke.  I may at some point sneak back on.  But hide posts from anyone who puts up articles about depressing things.

However, I got drawn into reading some articles, and after reading them I just felt so angry and scared and upset.  I saw one cartoon which said "My desire to be well informed is at odds with my desire for sanity"  -  that just about sums it up.  I think  you can say  -I do not want to see posts like these.  But its a tricky business.  These people are my friends and I agree with what they post.  And I too, think its a really dodgy situation we are all in.

I know its my fault I snuck back into it, and starting reading stuff.  And no doubt I will slip back into my old ways again.  But for now, I am reinstating my decision to step away from it and do 29 gifts.  I just need to go there again.  I have taken FB off my phone, and now off the ipad, and I am using the freedom app on my computer.  Because I need to step away from articles and scare mongering.  It might well be scary but I just cannot see what I can do about it.  I don't want to be someone who puts their head in the sand and hides as the world distintergrates.  But I do not know what to do.  And I don't want to feel scared and worried by things I cannot do anything about.  I have voted and I have an MP who at least stands up for stuff I  believe in.  And  - there.  I do not know what else I can do.  IF anyone has any ideas, then please let me know.  Anger and frustration without control, or action.  Is not healthy.  Its not doing me any good.  And I am backing away from FB.  And the news.  I will talk to people about it, as that seems OK, but nah.  I can't do it.

Am off again.  I am going to re read the actual 29 gifts book.  And I am back on the giving.  Namaste y'all.  I kind of slowed on the gifts thing by being literal.  I was on the 29 gifts site and noticed a comment from Librarian Lou that "Cami’s kind of giving is motivated by giving others delight, like making a  meal for husband or finding that just right present.  She also talks about receiving gifts graciously from others." So I will be less pressurised on my self for the whole actual present thing and just be motivated to give others delight.  Hence - so far today I gave a hearty compliment to a lady who lives in our street who has changed her hair colour.  It looks FAB.  I hope she was delighted!

 And just to say, when I say I am stepping away from FB.  I will be not going there to read or browse.  If absolutely necessary I will post there, (I did find our electrician from the fab Hanover Community Notice Board for example) and my blog posts and instagram will feed through to it.  So transmitting but not receiving via FB>  contact by email, here or  - by phone if you know me!

xxxxx

So - so far as I am awre, the unexpected gift from the universe or the FP was that lovely realisation.  Certainly nothing material, that I am aware of has shown up.  So, perhaps you need to be specific.

I think i would like something unequivically a material gift.  Yes actually I really would.  From another person.

It seems that giving, as in doing the 29 gifts, works extremely well as a way of receiving gifts.  As while I do it, i have had many surprise gifts.

So in terms of my experiments  -that has definitely been the best one.

Not that I was doing it to receive gifts - not at all.  Any gift I received was indeed totally unexpected.

I'd like to see if the FP can provide me with any small, but material, unexpected gift, from a person.  for no reason whatsoever.  I'm giving it 36 hours cos I am deeply impatient.  So by the end of tomorrow.

Experiment B begins.

Oh, and the other thing is, I am not going to be doing a 'diet day' for 5:2 today.  I was going to, but I realised I am out for lunch, so I won't have any idea what has gone into the soup we will be served.  Yesterday I eat really healthy foods.  I didn't binge on weetabix at all.  (this randomly is my thing!) and I didn't drink a load of wine (another 'thing'!) or eat a lot of crisps (oh, I seem to have a lot of 'things' - though to be fair, the 'load of wine' and 'a lot of crisps' often go together.  No, I eat super nourishing delicious food and felt totally satisfied.  And today I shall do the same.  Not too much, mostly vegetables, no wine, weetabix or crisps.  x

with thanks to http://cookjmex.blogspot.co.uk/2012/12/purepecha-fiesta-at-ajijic-plaza.html (let me know if its not OK to use this image and I'll find another!)

Yesterday I wrote about receiving an unexpected gift.  Obviously I wasn't very specific, but there was something about it being undeniably unexpected and a gift.

So far, I am not sure if I am going to count these, but I found 5p.  That's not a gift, that's a find.  But today in my dance class I did have a very powerful realisation and it felt pretty magical and profound.

So given that this gift is coming from, erm, the FP, which is a non definable thing as such.  This could have been it.  THough if I am asking this question, its not as if it is undeniable is it.

It was pretty briliant though.  And hard to explain, it was as I was dancing, and I've been having these slight crise of self consciousness.  Or perhaps more precisely, in my head, I feel I look a certain way, and yet lately, I have been catching a glimpse of myself and been rather shocked at how I actualy look.  Or perhaps dissapointed.  And this idea was floating in and out of my head as I was dancing,  "I wonder how I look right now?" and it would fluctuate between thinking, I bet I look amazing I am dancing so well, to an immediate flip to, oh, no probably not, I probably look pretty crap or average.  Either way, it was distracting me from enjoying my dancing. 

So then, I just had this realisation that - seeing as no one was looking at me, and I was just dancing, I could imagine I looked like anyone.  So for a while I was a fat jolly mexican woman.  That felt good.  Then I was a more ethereal tilda swinton type.  And the music was wondeful and I was being this angel creature and I was totally immersed in it all, and I got this huge wave of emotion of just how free I felt.


I think the point is, I look how I look.  But being self concious doesn't do me any favours.  I would like to stay fit and stanging up tall and straight, but aside from that, its about how I feel  - inside.

And at my age, its not as if I will be a young natural beauty.  I am not that.  But stuff worrying about it.  I look how I look, but on the inside I can be whoever I like. 

I have to say the fat jolly Mexican lady felt really fun.  The etheral angel creature felt good too. 

I am going to play with this.  So unexpected gift? yes it could be.  Lets see if anythnig else turns up!

Morning! - wow its a glourious day here.  Sunny, hot, holiday like .

So 29 gifts is still going.  Although I have lost count of the days and I am not giving a gift everyday.  So its kind of not 29 gifts but a general aim to give presents.  And I am good with that.  Yesterday I gave a home made card to a school mum and a little purse to her youngest daughter.  Bub had been round theirs for a play.  She's lovely and really took to the idea of giving gifts as a way of making yourself and other happy.

 It does most definitely feel good all round to be a giver.

So, yesterday I started reading a book which is about practical or scientific experiments with what the author calls the Field of Potentiality.  Or it maybe the Field of Presence.  Not sure.  Either way I am joining in and conducting some experiments.

Firstly, I have asked the FP for an unexpected gift.  The kind I don't normally receive and I have given the FP a time limit of 48 hours.  So by the end of Wednesday.  I do tend to believe in this sort of magic so lets see what happens when its a scientific experiment.

The other experiment, which I am tryign at the same time (because I am impatient) is called the VW Jetta principle, which is essentially, when you start thinking about something it turns up all over the place.  Given the world and its news at the moment I am looking for the following; Peace, Wise Leadership and Kindness.  If you have any stories of any of these things I would love to hear them.

Hub told me about the time Muhammed Ali raised a shed load of money for the Hebrew University to start a Peace Studies course.  That is a good story and definitely embodies the qualities of Peace, Wise Leadership and Kindness. 

I'm putting this one out there.  I am looking for evidence of Peace, Wise Leadership and Kindnesss in the world.  Please share any evidence you have.

Lastly - I am finding myself coming across references to A Course in Miracles and Buckminster Fuller quite a lot at the moment.  This I figure is because I am going to help some folk in Findhorn who have developed a board game based on Miracles book, and Bucky Fuller.... seems to give some excellent quotes.  He said that, "you can't fight the old model, you have to build a new one that is better".  I like that.  And I am going to find out more about Buckminster Fuller.

Oh and I found out that there is already a PR company called Wild Card.  To be fair the woman who runs it does have the surname, Wild.  So its a good call for her.  Am thinking I might rebrand my idea for a business as Practical Magic.  As I like the combination of these two things in my life.

I am feeling spacious today.  No reason really, nothing has changed much.  I did go dancing this morning, and that was brilliant.  Somehow I just feel positive.  Hurrah.

SO.

I have a quest to find work for the summer.  Not too much of course, as I have things to do, like a camping trip, a work and family visit trip to Scotland, and a big holiday to Barcelona and the South of France.

But never the less.  I have work (or money / income) to manifest.  I am aiming for *at least* £2500 per month for July and August- oh AND September .  Anything is considered, however it must fit around Bub care and holidays (I have my priorities on STRAIGHT!)

OK.  What do I have now, already.

A commission for a piece of art.
Some work doing the e-learning modules - at least 3 days to invoice for.
Possibly some work doing research for CFT.  TBC
The Scottish trip (though because we are making this also a family trip... its kind of cost neutral) (I am very excited by their product however, and in going to Findhorn - watch this space)

I am an accredited Business and Leadership coach with years of experience in helping creative folk get organised, sorted and motivated.  I have worked with 100s of people who had too much to do and not enough time to do it in - helping them develop skills, tools and mindsets to deal with the onslaught!
I run some pretty awesome creative workshops to kick start creativity and an art practice.
I am a qualifed yoga teacher
I love my work. 


What things can I do?
Contact everyone I know and let them know what it is I can do  - for income.
Put some art up on etsy
get the loft done and hence allow the possibility of renting that out for airbnb or ownersdirect.
get a student in to this back room.
set up some art workshops for the summer. and September.
Start a yoga class on Sundays.  Maximise the Sunday thing as of September.  Term time only of course.  Now where could that be? I would really like to do that!


So dearest darlingest Universe - which apart from the Brexit (which possibly has hidden opportunities, because that is the kind of mindset I have....)  - has provided me with all sorts of wonderful opportunities and delights.  Please may I manifest some gloriously wonderful work and money income for August and September.  I will put word out, and do whatever I can.  I promise.

Lastly I just want to say that I am getting very excited about the house in Croatia of which I will have a share.  Thank you for that totally unexpected wonderful thing.  Namaste

I have slightly lost track of the gifts thing.  If I am honest.  But regardless of that things are in fact going well.  Well, when I say well..... it appears that the world of politics in this country is actually imploding.  However, seeing as I am not concentrating on that over which I have no control, its not so bad.

Here in Brighton we have a new house colour and a new door.  Its quite striking and I am very happy with it.  Hub wanted a slightly more slatey blue colour, but we found that very tricky to find and Bro persuaded us to go full on - off black.  Either way its much nicer than it was.

I watched When We Were Kings on Friday night. And also managed to get extremely drunk and hence had a HORRIBLE hangover on Saturday morning.  Truly the WORST.  I shall not be drinking for some time.  And I may not touch Cava ever again.  Famous last words of course, but its been a very long time since I have had anything like such a hideous hangover.

Sunday we went to visit friends who live in Ashdown Forest. I discovered that both my husband and my son would rather live in a forest than by the sea.  Which is really disturbing and I dream of being by the sea.  I guess my son won't be living with us forever.  And I guess there must be forests by the sea.  Perhaps  its not a wash out.

I went to a swish in the evening and kitted myself out with a whole new summer wardrobe.  If we do ever get any summer of course! Its been so dark and rainy.  I have got a fabulous little mustard yellow swing jacket by Autograph.  And that makes me very happy.

I am still doing the 5:2.  Today was my first fast day of week 2.  It was really easy!  I haven't even hit my 500 calories yet and am just eating dinner.


I am nearing the end of The Art of Money.  I am rather pleased that I am doing quite a lot of it already.  One thing I have really enjoyed from it, is the renaming of your expenses in a way that makes it all more fun.  So for example, Mortgage repayments can be "our beautiful home"  or something like that.  And its a way of aligning financial records with values.  So seeing as a beautiful home is definiately something I value, spending on that, seems more appropriate.

Speaking of homes.  or houses, it seems that my brother is investing in a holiday house in Hvar Croatia.  or on it,  Its an island.   And the house is in Stari Grad. And as his savings alone do not cover the cost of it, we are going in as well.  And my parents have chipped in with a chunk too, as well as my brother's best friend.  Its rather exciting.  In fact its extremely exciting and not at all something I was thinking of doing.  Its kind of the opposite of the whole "Brexit" nonsense really.   Sod it, lets buy somewhere in Europe.  So all going well, and the pound not continuing to plummet, we will be going to Croatia soon.

My brother is here to paint our house.  I had a whole heap of colour panics yesterday, but the fact that the colour label was missing from the tin and the Dulux colour matcher thing was being repaired, and the other paint shop place couldn't seem to match the paint either, turned out to be a good thing.  My brother being late also turned out to be a good thing too.  As the whole delay meant I waited to him to have him give his opinion on the paint colours as well.  The match pots I had just were not quite right, but I was about to plump for one or t'other as I knew I was going to have to buy the paint for him to start!

So in this whole meantime, I went to the Flourpot to buy some bread.  We had all agreed that this cafe was a good colour for us.  Me, my brother, my husband.  In fact this had been the colour we had been trying to match by eye!

So I was in there, buying bread, and thought I would ask them if they knew what colour the outside walls were painted.  The first girl didn't know, but the other one thought she knew who might know and took my number and offered to see if she could find out.

Later she texted me with "go to Johnstones paints on New England rd. ask for John and ask him for Flourpot Charcoal!  So later, my brother and I took the paint samples I had put on a bit of card and went there and compared the walls to the colours we had.  It was indeed the just right mix of the two but with a blue rather than a green tinge to it.  Definitely the colour we preferred.  So we dashed off at 4.30pm to Johnstones, John was there and sorted us out with paint.  It turns out that its a match for a Farrow & Ball colour.  So if anyone is interested, we are about to paint our house "off black"  yup.  a blooming Flourpot charcoal house! We have a veyr bright pink door and I think its going to look fab.  HA! well I blooming hope so.  Its been something I've been thinking about for several years now.  And whatever happens it will most definitely look better than the very grubby in need of a filling wall that we had before.

If you are interested in the whole Ideas for My home board I have built on pinterest.  Its here.

Will share pics of course!

With regard to the 29 gifts.  Still going.  I haven't been counting the days.  I am not sure where I am at.  I did give a gift on Tuesday. -  I tipped heavy on my morning coffee and donated to the charity they support too.  Wednesday.... I gave my undivided attention to a mum at school and listened to her air her grievances. Being off facebook is just great.  I am still horrified by the whole Brexit fiasco.  I believe the Chalcot report has added to the general hoo ha of bad politics.  Am feeling best well out of it.  There is not much I feel I can do about any of it, and getting angrier and more upset is not going to help anyone. 

The funny thing is that I seem to be being given gifts myself. On Monday, a friend offered to take Bub and give him tea and all for no reason, and yesterday,  I was given a pair of brand new shoes for my son (as another child's feet grew too much for them before they were even worn).   And I asked our builder chap if I could hire his ladder. I need one and was prepared to hire it from HSS but thought I'd ask him instead.  He refused money and insisted that we borrow it for a couple of days as he wasn't using it.  (I rounded his fee up some  - maybe i can buy him a bottle of wine? he's a nice man)

So no blues for me, as it happens.  I am in a beautiful space - Jane's Place -  will post photos if I can.  I have hired it for the day to work.  I have to write a report, but looking at the work I have done so far, I somehow think I may have got further with it than I had previously thought.  In fact.  I maybe have done it.

We will see.  And so am having a cup of tea and writing this.  I am back on the 5:2.  June was a mad mad hectic month for me.  I did Suffolk Open Studios and went away on an art retreat.  I also worked a lot and went out a lot.  I saw a play written by someone I know AT THE NATIONAL THEATRE no less.  And blimey it was brilliant!  (The Suicide by Suhayla El-Bushra) Only thing was I went to see if after a day that had started at 5.30am.  And I coached a lot of people that day, more than I normally do, so I was exhausted.  And getting back at past midnight was all a bit much.  On top of that because I was away so much Hub got pissed off with me, saying I was 'gallavanting' and all.  Which was true, of course. I kind of was, but also working and it all just came at once.  All of it had been organised months before, and it just piled up. So I felt really tired, but got no sympathy or respite because Hub had lots of work on and an exam to revise for and wasn't feeling much sympathy to said gallavanting.  Anyways, that's all over now, and it was my main excuse for halting the 5:2.  I did do about 4 -5 weeks and I did shed some kilos and some inches.  I now have a 5:2 buddy here in Brighton and am back in the game.

Being off facebook is really great.  It had become a frenzied place with the referendum and emotions were very high, and very low too.  I was not enjoying many of the posts about what a disaster it all was.  I know some people did vote to leave for non racist reasons and perhaps they were happy.  But Boris Johnson certainly didn't seem happy.  So given he was the leader of the Leave campaign, says it all to me.  I think that they all deserved the drubbing they got for that whole sordid affair.  And now lets see what happens.  But I am feeling good to be well out of it.  29 gifts is likewise going well.  I have to admit that I didn't manage anything specific on Saturday, or I could say I gifted a friend with some quiet time by looking after her son all Saturday afternoon.  I'm not sure.  I think I am going to give myself the benefit of the doubt  -ha another gift! be gentle and compassionate with yourself as well as others.   Yesterday I gave Hub the gift of going to buy him fish and chips, with my spending money (we are running a budget! take outs count as treats!) as he was very busy with work.  

Am still loving The Art of Money.  Looking forward to reading more of that later.  We are onto the practical stuff next.  But I have to say that I am very happy with our pot system.  Both Hub and I have a pot each with £50 cash in.  This is our spending money.  We have another pot with £50 cash in which is for food and household items.  We know what is a treat (which comes from our own spending pots) and what is not.  And we talk about it if we are not sure.  We decided yesterday that a lunch out with Ted's cousin who was visiting Brighton for the day, was sort of a treat but also unavoidable.  And its going into the food budget.  Or possibly will have its own pot of 'Entertaining".  This is not a frugality exercise, but it is a tracking one.  Awareness is key.  Though, it is helping with not being exessive with our own spending.  I have not bought quite a few coffees out already! Go me.  

We have also signed up to Xero accounting and this is also part of being a Money Maestress (I invented that word.  Hope it makes sense!)  

I am not supposed to be listening to politics or that sort of news.  But Hub is very interested in it so he tells me that there is talk of a new political party being set up with the express purpose of keeping the UK in the EU.  Funny old times.

On other news Wales beat Belgium 3-1.  Go the Wales.  Playing as a team, knowing what each of their strengths are and placing them in a positicion to play to those strengths.  Lots to be learned there.

Feels personally a little raw around the Art of Money edges.  It appears that I am not earning (since April anyways) as much as I thought I was earning.  June was fantastic.  But April and May were not.  March was damn fine as it happens,  but we decided to look at what we had earned since April.    So it brought my average way down.  I don't work in the holidays and this contributed.  And so on and so on.   I am learning to roll with these ups and downs.  But I smarted a little when it was shown up like this and knocked my confidence a bit.  So Art of Money says to get into your body and feel the feelings and notice where all the shame stories come from.  Allow them but don't be ruled by them.  Getting real is good, berating myself and shaming myself because I "shoud be doing better" is not helpful.

I need to teach how to earn fabulous amounts of money in concise amounts of time.  And the other thing I want to teach is how to earn money from things that - I am not sure how it is phrased.  But that is not me charging for my time.  But me earning from something that can be sold over and over.  So this is the question.  Keeping positve and Keep moving.

And 29 days and 29 gifts.  Am still off facebook which feels good.  And I need to think of another gift to give today.  I baby sat last night.  Which is money in the baby sitting bank, so to speak.

A gift to give away today..... let the opportunity arise.  And dear darling universe.  Let the opportunity arise that I may match my husband's income - and when I say that I mean that this year I would like for us both to earn more than he earned himself last year.  (a while ago I wished I would earn more than him and he started earning less than me! Not this time)  And dearest darlingest universe.  I would like for the opportunity to arise that shows me how I can earn passive income, unrelated to my hours and days. Namaste. 

Today had been full.  But now it has gaps.  I have given my gift already.  The woman in our neighbourhood who started the Hanover Community Noticeboard.  This is a FB group  -so I am not going there just now.  Actually its an awesome place to give gifts as anything you want to give away you just post it up and someone comes and gets it.  Or you can sell stuff.  Its a really cool thing.  So there was a write up about it in the local newspaper, "Hanover, is just a state of mind" it read.  She later posted that as she had been away she didn't have a IRL copy.  I kept it for her.  So today as well as that, which I was going to drop around anyway, I popped a few extra things in the envelope and wrote a note.  And walked round to pop it through her door.  Yes it felt good.

So in my gaps I have been reading The Art of Money and other interesting things.  I came across this quote.  "Teach what you most need to learn, no one learns more than the teacher".  Apparently its from A Course in Miracles.  I haven't read it.  I think its a weighty tome.  But perhaps its getting nearer.  I have had an enquiry from a couple who need Business Coaching (and the organisational side of this in particular) and they have created a game that is based on A Course in Miracles.  I think I might like it, given it seems to have influenced quite a few writers whose books I have read.

And this quote,  "Teach what you most need to Learn"  is something I oft recite with regard to my teaching productivity and organisation! Ha!  I am a creative, I proliferate wildy.  I need to edit muchly. Focus and Follow through are my challenge....

So I teach that.  I think the next thing I want to teach is how to set up and run a phenomenally successful light touch business that is fun to work in and makes lots of money with ease and delight.  That would be ace cool.   So - I will be working on that. 

Yesterday I almost didn't give anything away.  In a way I didn't, not especially, not like a thing.  I thought about it all day and even that really helped.  I so enjoyed not being on facebook and hearing the days politics gone over and over.  Its a relief to get back to the day to day business of living.  Living my politics so to speak.  I had arranged to so coaching session with a friend which had been part of my assignement for my Business & Leadership coaching course.  Because it had been a while since we had last spoken it was also a little bit of a catch up, and given the events of late it was hard not to discuss how we were both feeling.  I told her how i had decided to stop going over how bad it all was and focus on the 29 gifts as a way of taking back my own optimism.  And she kindly pointed out that this coaching session was a gift of my time.  So that was what I gave away yesterday.  My time and expertise.  Though I admit it was quite an informal session and because of her optimism I actually got a lot out of it. Perhaps that is what it is all about, when you give you get. 

She was really hopeful, and was welcoming the change in the air and saw it as an opportunity.  So that was really refreshing.  We both managed to steer clear of any pessimistic thoughts!

Today I am - excited can't be the right word.... but I am actually very delighted.  A bit delighted.  Well I just recognise that my Hub and I have reached a point where we are going to have a finance and budgeting meeting.  We have actually agreed how this will work.  We AGREED it.  It is in fact momentous, because being able to talk about money is SOOOO HARD.  Or can be, and certainly has been for us.  So, for any of you who see this Money Work as actually proper spiritual, psychological stuff, this is a big and good thing for us.  We are, at our ripe old age HA, being adult about it. 

So far, we have 3 spending pots in the kitchen.  One is for household and food items bought locally by cash.  And we both have a weekly allowance each, in cash.  We have also agreed guideline budgets for other things such as.. now, what are they = oh yes,  Clothing; Personal Care; Learning & Development, Christmas & Gifts.  Because we like to spend differently (I am more inclined towards travel, trips and holidays - he is more inclined to splash out big on birthdays and Christmas)  We can save up to spend on these things over and above the guidelines.  Its experimental at the moment.  But for me, this is major.  Before any conversation we had was ended with   -well we have to earn more money!  -which we do, and part of our financial meeting is to look at that - but there was never any consideration to looking at how we spent the money we had and how we prioritised that.  That was something that was just not allowed to be discussed as it was seen as being stingy and mean. 

So   -just to balance this ridiculous glee at an agreed spending budget, and the fact that we can both agree on it.  We also have in place a structure to discuss income.  We will be looking at what we both earned each month, and what is due in the month to come.  We have a basic target to meet that will cover our expenses.  And so if we are not meeting that we need to really come up with ideas to do so.  Then if that is being met, we have good and ultimate targets to meet.  To keep us moving forward.  And so the idea is, we start to gain control over our finances.  We can track the spending and the income, know where we are and make informed decisions based on facts.  Sigh.  Can't tell you how happy this makes me.  Being a couple can make all this very tricky!! But we have buy in.  From both of us, on both counts.  Becuase it will only work if we both take part.  I am so proud of us. 

Coincidentally I am reading Bari Tesler's book, The Art of Money.  I am a bit fascinated by her work - she is a "Financial Therapist"  and combines the psycholigical with the nuts and bolts practicalities.  And its something that really interests me.  Has done for a while actually.  I am interested by how she managed to combine her spiritual psychological somatic coaching life with that of being a book keeper.  Its not exactly the same as my life path, but I have this wild creative messy side and this side that wants to tidy up and keep track and be very nuts and bolts and getting stuff done.  And there is no way I am giving either up! So its an interesting read.  And given where Hub and I have got to, and what she advocates, I am again, doubly proud of us.  We rock. 

And just in case you are interested in reading a few good books on this subject.  I recommend these;
The Soul of Money, Overcoming Underearning and this video by Charles Davis whose course, Creative with Money I did.  

So  - day 2.  28 gifst to go.  Giving something away today.  I shall muse upon it and let you know tomorrow what happened.  xxx