Roots and Wings

It's been a long time since we chatted, but these googly-eyed girls have had a way of keeping us busy, or more like buried.  I will be the first to admit that having a new 13 year old toddler and an 11 year old 7 year old has not been easy.  There have been many days that I thought I'm not going to make it, with no real definition of what I was trying to make it to - their adulthood, first day of school, the next day, hour or minute.  It all seemed impossible.  There have been times when I said to Maryn, "Don't make me look at one more stupid thing!  I can't look at one more stupid thing because someone else is making me look at stupid things, and I just can't do it anymore!!"


So now you're waiting for me to say "but now..." but there isn't a but.  School started, and it saved me.  We reached a milestone.  I made it to August 22.  And, now we go from here.  Our new normal is a work in progress.  It's getting better, and I feel like I can breathe.

The 5:30 a.m. wake up call came early, but we got right to it.  Went to the hotel restaurant after our grand showers, and the buffet was a show stopper.  We said goodbye to Michelle and her daughter, Harper, who were our train travel buddies and then checked out.  We took a very short shuttle ride to the airport, and I snapped a few pictures before we went in. Although I didn't see anything of Hong*Kong except the back of Tom's head on the wrong side of the van we comandeered the night before to get to our hotel, we both felt like it was a place we wouldn't mind seeing more of on another trip.  Maybe it was the SUNSHINE and BLUE SKIES. 

By the time we went through check in and immigration, it was time to board the plane.  When I got to my seat, I realized the entertainment options we had on the 767 to *China* were not present on the 747 we took home.  A slump of the shoulders was all there was time for, and we were on our way.  I don't know how it can be, but it didn't seem like such a long trip.  When I noticed my watch at three hours into it, it seemed like an eternity to go, but then there were only three more hours to go, and it was a piece of cake.  I noticed the flight map south of Japan, just north of Japan and then we were over Seattle.  We landed early, made it through immigration after several chunk, chunks of the stamper and walked the newest American citizen through the doors to the rest of her life.

As this trip of a lifetime winds down, it's important for us to share our gratitude with so many who have made this trip possible.  In no certain order, but for this first one, here goes.  Thank you, God.  Quite a while ago, you planted a seed in our hearts that blossomed into the joy of our daughter, Maryn.  For that we are eternally grateful.  When it came time to sow seeds again, God called on us, we listened, and we are already witnessing new joy with Tenley.  Thank you for entrusting us with these incredible gifts, for guiding us to take this path, and knowing we were headed this way all along.  Thank you to our families who have supported us to this point and will continue to hold us up in the days to come, loving us every step of the way.  Thank you to our friends and church family who have waited with us and prayed for us.  Thank you to strangers, like the woman ahead of me in line at *Target* one day who asked me why I was buying bedding, and when I told her she said, "Fantastic!  I'm so happy for you," and  gave me her coupon for a $5 gift card.  You have shown us nothing but enthusiasm, excitement, smiles, "that's great"s and more prayers than we could ever count, but I know we felt every one of them.  Thank you to the writers of our letters of reference, twice!  You fooled them well.  Thank you to our wonderful, caring friends for loving our sweet Toby in our absence and for transporting us to the airport when we were excited and from the airport when we will be exhausted.  Thanks to our amazing computer guy who hooked me up technologically without which I wouldn't have been able to keep this priceless journal, and thanks to  his wife, our friend, for sacrificing his time for me, too, and making me laugh.  Thank you to our Chinese friends who brought and bring Chinese language and culture into our lives by being daughters to us and big sisters to Maryn and now Tenley.  Thank you to our Chinese friends who so graciously welcomed us to *China* this time around.  Thank you to our neighbors who shared our excitement and will warmly welcome Tenley just as they do Maryn.  Thank you to Maryn's classroom teacher and English language teacher for all you have done to enable Maryn to make this trip of a lifetime and share it with her classmates.  You have done so much to make the world a smaller, friendlier place for all your students. Thank you to our Huainan family for walking this same path before us and after us offering your support and sharing an incredible, unbreakable bond with us.  Thank you to our adoption agency which facilitated this adoption cheerfully and seamlessly.  Thank you to *Love*Without*Boundaries* and all the wonderful volunteers and sponsors who give so much to improve the lives of those whose lives truly need improving by being present physically and financially, providing nutrition, education, medical and foster care, among other things, and loving so many angels.  Thank you to the people we've been blessed to meet and those who we likely will never meet who looked into the eyes of Maryn and Tenley and loved them long before we did.

Although this is the only bronze statue we saw that looked like this while we were here, we know He has been with us throughout this journey.  We see His face everywhere we turn.  We are a blessed and grateful family.  Thank you!

Don't you just hate it when your hotel messes up your reservation and doesn't have adjoining rooms available until they clean one so they put you in a three room suite with three bathrooms instead?  Yeah, we do, too.  What we really hate, though, is that we got here late and we are leaving early in the morning.  Boooo!  When we walked in the door, Tenley's eyes really sparkled, and she said something in Chinese which we think translates to "Sweet!"  She then asked if this was our house.  We tried to let her down gently, but she won't really hit rock bottom until we finally get home, and there is no buffet.  Maryn even said, "Remember, mom, you said I had to take a shower in the morning."  I gave her the head tilt and said, "You really want to, don't you?"  She nodded.  You know the accomodations are spectacular when a child puts words into your mouth about taking a shower.  Better get to bed so I can get up in just a few hours and make the most of the suite life.

Canton Tower, Guangzhou*China

Michael, our fabulous guide.

Lunch at the railroad station.

And on the last day, they served kai shui in a mug.

Hotel Restaurant, August 2009

Hotel elevator, May 2012

Just couldn't finish the trip without the goggle shot.  Even though Maryn wanted nothing to do with the hotel pool even during the hottest days *Guangzhou* had to offer in 2009, she did wear her goggles frequently.  Tenley, however, has been using them for their intended purpose and giving them a good workout, be they upside down or right side up.  These girls are fish!  Everyday Tenley asks if we are going swimming.  It's adorable to hear her ask, "Meiguo youyong?" (May-gwaw yo-yong = do you swim in America?)  On more than one occasion, I have confirmed that we swim there.  Yesterday I sat at the outdoor pool on the ninth floor watching them in the pool for about three hours.  Tenley wears floaties and an inner tube made for about an 18 month old child that I got at the dollar store.  It just fits.  The whole time I hear, "Mommy," just like any kid would say when they want their parent to watch.  She puts her face in the water without hesitation and moves her arms like she sees Maryn do.  Then she comes up with a big smile on her face and repeats the same steps over and over.  She wants to know how to swim and is excited to be signed up for swimming lessons.

Maryn and Tenley have their best bonding time in the pool.  Tenley is helpless and Maryn is there to help.  Tom was throwing a ball to Tenley and making it land just out of her reach so she could "swim" to it, but if she couldn't get it, Maryn would swim over and get it for her, and each time Tenley would gratefully say "sonk you."  At this stage of the game, Maryn is really the big sister, and although she's younger and still working on her own language and social development, her life experience since coming home is making her seem way, way more mature.  She still has her moments, though, that really make me smile.  The other day I was telling Tenley something was hers so I said to her, "Ni de (knee-duh = yours), ni de."  Maryn turns to me and says, "Wait, is her name Nida now?"  Everytime I think of it, like right now, it cracks me up.  She is such a dear, and she's been working real hard on this trip.  Sonk you, Babygirl.

On Monday morning our guide came by to round us up and get us and two other families back to the medical clinic for a reading of the TB test.  The clinic used to be right here on Shamian*Island, but it was moved sometime between the last time we were here and now.

Now it's located in an office building in the business/financial section of *Guangzhou*.  When the elevator door opens, there's that usual din that accompanies any of the official business we do here, with a lot of crying babies sprinkled on top.  The guides do a great job of getting you through the small space packed with humanity and before long your back on the bus again.

On the way back to our current hotel, we went past the hotel we stayed in last time.  Wait, let me grab a tissue and wipe a tear, not for the nostalgia but for the really sweet accomodations then: beautiful room, spacious restaurant with view, large pool with comfy lounge chairs and umbrellas, and a gym.  Every night Tom and I would lay in the dark waiting for Maryn to fall asleep, and then I would sneak out and go down to this *$$ to do my blog posting.  The internet connection was slow, but I enjoyed the international atmosphere of this spot, and the smell of coffee while I typed.

This morning we had our consulate appointment.  That's the whole purpose of coming through this city, so it's a big deal when it's done.  Those of us carrying blue passports with a big, gold eagle on the front get to go right past all the people waiting in line outside and inside the building for visa processing as we ascend to the fifth floor.  There a nice woman speaks into a tiny microphone from behind the glass, gives you a few instructions, including DO NOT OPEN THE BROWN ENVELOPE, then makes you stand and swear or affirm that everything you have declared thus far, and it's a lot!!!, is true to the best of your knowledge.  We opted for swearing, but it turns out we didn't have to because we were done in no time.  It's a strange sensation when you reach this milestone.  You're in a very nondescript, grayly colored and lit room, stripped of your camera, with a few children playing in the dirty, plastic playhouse behind you, yet you can't help but wipe a tear or two.  It's the point at which you feel like you gave birth to a mountain of paperwork, and a lot, but not all the necessary paperwork, is behind you.  Going forward from this point means you're no longer trying to get to this point, and it's a tremendous relief.  The other part of it, as I mentioned above, is that you continuously move past line after line of people who want something that you already possess, the ability to enter the country you just so happened, and I'll add by the grace of God, to have been born in.  It's an incredible feeling, and one we won't soon forget.

We were up early this morning to get to our appointment at 8:30.  There we were in the restaurant at 7 a.m., and I was throwing down my jelly bread with cream cheese, one hard boiled egg, one yougurt (and as I typed that I just realized why Louise always calls it you-gurt) and the ubiquitous kai shui (ky shuway = boiled water, and for some strange reason it's always served in a regular drinking glass not in a mug with a handle so it won't actually remove the flesh from your fingers) when I had to take someone to the restroom, once again.  I stood up from the table, looked at Tom and said, "Next time we'll be bringing home a boy!"  As I walked away from the table I heard, "I want you to look deep into my eyes.....!"

Being in China the parents of these beautiful girls right there in front of us - priceless.

Being in China looking at giant pandas right there in front of us - priceless.

People bought branches of leaves to feed the giraffes.  They took the branches right out of their hands with their really long tongues, chewed on the leaves and spit the branches out.

Amazing color on these birds from India.


Cheesecake from down undah.

 Yesterday we spent the day at the safari park right outside of *Guangzhou*.  Our guide made the arrangements for us and a single mom who is here with her adorable two year old.  Coral and her friend Qi Jie were in, too, and that made it even more fun for us.  Maryn buddied up with Coral in an instant and Tenley walked with us or Qi Jie or helped with the two year old.  There were plenty of eyes to watch everyone in our group and that gave Tom and I the chance to hold hands every now and then.  A date at a safari park in *China* - go figure.  It was a really enjoyable outing, and I recommend it to all the families who will follow after us.  We started off on the tram tour which took us past open habitats for different animals by world regions.  The park trams share the road with cars driven by regular folks.  Fortunately, it was a little more orderly than it is on the regular roads here, and I only saw one emu-ish looking bird actually bumped by a car.  I'm sure it happens all the time, because the bird walked off like it was just another day in the park.  We saw the usual cast of characters seen at a safari park, I suspect, and some were exotic.  A lot of the animals had room to roam which made it seem less like a zoo.  We closed the afternoon with an elephant show at 2:30.  That kind of thing usually makes me sad.  I'm sure those elephants, if left in their own environment, would not have been playing soccer or basketball like we saw them doing yesterday, but as crazy as it sounds, I found myself wondering if that was enjoyable for them.  If only big game hunters would put their weapons down and start taking toys on safari with them, the world would be a better place.

The show went on through the afternoon rain shower, but we were dry under the roof of the amphitheater.  Afterward, the eight of us waited out the rain under an overhang before heading to our bus.  Our outing came to a close, and we dropped Coral and Qi Jie at a subway station just around the corner from the park so they could get to the airport.  I shed a few tears as I hugged them goodbye, blew them a kiss and the bus headed back to the hotel.  We had dinner at Lucy's, a well known restaurant here on Shamian*Island, and ended the night with four hands of *Uno*.  It's a great way to bring four people together with hand signals or limited language skills.  We played again tonight with four willing participants who graciously high five the winner of each round.  There was plenty of laughter tonight as tired kids were getting silly and tired parents were getting slap happy.  When the laughter reached it's crescendo, Maryn said, "I love this family."  We must be making progress.

Okay, we're there means we've reached that point at which we just want to go home.  It happens on every trip of this type.  You don't want to live out of a suitcase, figure out where to eat the next meal that doesn't include the hotel buffet, and you don't want to eat the hotel buffet one more time, and you just need to get back and get some sort of life routine going.  The look on Maryn's face sums it up perfectly for me except for the fact that that look just shows her normal personality and not that she can't take it anymore.  We're still a long way from knowing what Tenley's personality will be when the shock wears off, the language barrier is lessened, and she's able to get a lot more life experience on her resume.  I can't even imagine the bravery of a girl who's willing to sign her name to a paper changing her life forever with no idea of what that might entail.  With that in mind,  I hope you'll include her, and us, in your prayers today as we come together as a family.

At long last we were able to hug this darling person.  Her name is Coral, she lives in *China*, and we met when she attended the local university pursuing a master's degree.  She started out as our language tutor as we waited for Maryn, but it didn't take long for her to become much more special to us than that.  She stayed with us on weekends and school holidays, and we went on vacation together.  We haven't seen her since March 2008, and she has been greatly missed.  The last time we were here, in August 2009, she had planned to fly to *Guangzhou* to meet us, but a typhoon went through her area, and all planes were grounded.  It was hard to be so close and, yet, so far, but there was nothing we could do about it.  This time there was nothing stopping her, so she flew to *Guangzhou* yesterday morning, and we spent yesterday and most of today with her and her friend from college who lives here.  It was great to see her waiting for us in the lobby of the hotel when we returned from the medical exam and to hear her say, "Hi, Mom," when our eyes met.  Although they had never met before, she has a special connection to Maryn by being part of the wait and preparation for her arrival.  It was a very fast day and a half, and we were sorry to see her go today.  Until next time, we love you, Coral.

We had a 3 p.m. flight to *Guangzhou* yesterday so our guide, Queenie, was to pick us up at 1 p.m., and we were so ready to move on, but then the phone rang, and Tom made the mistake of answering it.  3 p.m. was now 7 p.m., and we had to be out of our hotel room by 2.  We stored our luggage with the bellperson, although that makes it seem like there was a regularly assigned bellperson when there really wasn't, so I'll change that to a guy in a small hat came and got our bags and put them in a closet in the lobby.  That left us with two backpacks, one filled with all the important papers we are not willing to let out of our sight and the other with all the electronic devices we own except for our 50" TV.  We walked back to the shopping mall for one last lunch and to kill some time before Queenie, whose name, by the way, Tom thought was Weenie for the first 24 hours because he heard it for the first time in a loud airport after not sleeping for a 14 hour flight, 8 hour layover and one hour flight to the other side of the world, came to pick us up at 5 p.m.  She took us into the airport, got us checked in and hugged us goodbye at security.  Now we were on our own to suck down every last drop of secondhand smoke until our flight left.  At the airport in *Hefei* There is a constant barage of flight numbers and information, mostly cancellations and delays, being announced in Chinese and English, leaving you filled with dread that your number is going to be called, and then it was, but we missed everything that was said after 5225.  That left us with about 25 minutes of dread before seeing the sign read 5225 19:00.  Suddenly they were loading the plane, and I'm in the bathroom with Tenley trying to encourage her to get a move on.  When we got to the gate Tom said, "Don't you know what final boarding call means?"  But how can anyone make that out with the bombardment of information streaming through the ear canal.? I handed three boarding passes to the woman at the desk, and she started dealing money back to me telling me, "She child."  I looked at Tom in a what the? sort of way, and he told me they were paying us because the flight was late, and we only get half for Maryn because she is a child, which I know makes no sense to anyone who has ever been stuck in an airport, whether smoke filled or not, with a child.  Tenley was excited all day about the feiji (fay-gee = airplane), and she finally got a chance to experience it.  She did a great job getting her wings.  No fear through any of it, just a smile when she felt us lift off the ground and wide eyes when we bumped for the landing.  A seasoned traveler.  We arrived in *Guangzhou* and were met by another guy in a small hat from our hotel who delivered us safely to our destination.  We went to bed way too late considering we had to be in the lobby at 9:30 a.m. this morning, but at least the airline paid us to be tired.