Chris

hey, so as I explained below I can only post one video at a time. Here is this one too.




Also, as long as I have your attention, I would like to tell you about this weird dream I had a few days ago that really creeped me out.
I was writing with a mechanical pencil and took out the eraser and tipped out the lead, but it was really sharp and stuck in my finger. There were like six of them and they broke off in my skin and fell. I was worried about them shattering on the ground so i put my foot out, but they stabbed my foot too. It was like my worst fears about fiberglass (I've never really trusted that stuff) but with pencil leads. It still kind of freaks me out too. They are so thin and long...

Hello fans.

So... Syria huh? crazy special ops stuff. I've been trying to get my arabic back up. I go out with the missionaries a few times every month and we have been visiting this Sudanese guy who doesn't speak a whole lot of english. The problem is, Sudanese arabic is like nothing I've ever heard. He gave a prayer at the end of one of our lessons and I understood the first three words and the last three words and the rest was some whacked out gutteral mumbling. So I've been trying to find some Iraqis. Apparently there are a bunch of Iraqi refugees here in Lincoln.
Hmmm. Oh, I wasted some time today looking at the bike trails in northern Virginia. Hoping for that internship. I will hear back by November 10. There are some really cool ones all along from Purcellville to, like, Alexandria. I ordered a map and some other information under Sophie's name.
As long as we are talking about bikes, there is a workshop in Ashland, Oregon that has bike classes. You can pay like $2,000 and go there and make your own frame. They provide all the tools, instruction, and materials and teach you how to make your own custom frame. What's awesome is that I was planning on getting a custom frame when I get older and can afford it anyways, so how cool would it be to spend the same amount of money and make your own frame instead of just ordering it? And then you get to deck it out in all the parts you want and everything.
That is also something I did to waste some time today.
Also, I wasted some time learning about metallurgy and welds. Brazing vs TIG welding and all that. But now I am just showing off.
Classes are still going well. I have to start outlining all of my classes in more depth now because crunch time is coming up in a few weeks. I am not looking forward to my tests at all.

Anyways, chances are you are more excited to see new, never-before-released videos of Slaps.
Here you go.

Hmm. Looks like I can only load one at a time. Well, this one is my favorite one anyways. I'll put up the next one right afterward.

Much love suckahs

so i came home the other day to find that boapers had left her spoon and bowl on the floor and had left the milk out all day. Not only that, but she had left her books on the ground and hadn't taken care of her monkey. Needless to say, I was disappointed, so I tried to go and find her. Anna was taking a nap, but I couldn't find that baby anywhere. That's when I noticed the door to the bathroom was locked. Luckily I have many skills and was able to pry open the door, and this is what I found:
Mostly, I was shocked. Not so much that she had gotten the make-up, grown and styled her hair, or found, lit, and smoked a cigarette, but that she had actually gotten her septum pierced! So she'll cry and mope for days after an immunization, but she'll find the money and time to orchestrate a run to the mall and pierce one of the most sensitive areas of her face? Really...
Kids... what can you do, right?

Try and edit THAT picture for the computer background, family! HA!

SO, as I promised I will start my Iraq lectures this posting. Or I would, but it requires more research than I am willing to commit. I would have to go get a book. Or look at wikipedia.
So I'll just say this for now: Muqtada al-Sadr is pretty important. Don't trust anyone who talks about Iraq and doesn't drop his name. Also, If you are ever in an argument or disagreement about something (anything) related to Iraq, just mention the Kurds:

Enemy: Are you dumb on purpose? How could you possibly think that staying in/running from Iraq is good policy?

You: Well what about the Kurds?

Enemy: *flop sweat*

You: The Kurds... yep. Them Kurds...

Enemy: Whatever hick/hippie... *sniffle*

The fact is, NO ONE has any clue about what to do with Iraq. If the U.S. leaves, Iran will enter through the south and take control of the Shiite areas and establish a super strong hold there. If the U.S. stays, the american public will become more and more disillusioned with our purpose there and we will spend lots of money with no clear purpose. Also, there is the argument that a continuous presence makes us an easy scapegoat for problems that aren't related to the U.S. occupation which would create more opposition to the U.S. And then the purpose is defeated. So... whatever right? All we can hope is that everyone just rides bikes. If we all rode bikes then no one would be able to travel far enough to ruffle anyone else's feathers, right? And all the steel that would be saved could go to making some pretty sweet frames. We could have whole nations riding together. A whole country of bike paths... In the Netherlands they have these awesome bike-specific trash cans that are tilted so you can throw trash in while you are riding. How cool would it be to ride from, like, Texas to Minnesota without having to stop at red lights? I'll bet everyone rides Rivendells in the Millenium.
But no. Looks like cars, war, and writhing economies are here to stay.

Hate for Bikes = Job Security

*sniffle*
the sweetest bike

I found this site online that lets you download old video games.
actually that's a lie. I went looking for this old computer game and found it online.
Bryan and Nathan should remember it because we played it all the time.
And now i play it while I hold the Boapers and get her to be quiet.
Check it out y'all. I present to you:
Remember this game?


with all those awesome monsters?


Man, that game was awesome. We would sit around and get so amazed at the different weapons and monsters that would show up.

I found a site that lets you download the original Oregon Trail too. That's pretty cool. I haven't played that since like 2nd grade.

Old games are pretty fun. It's like finding an old toy and remembering how fun it was. I still remember the two coolest toys I ever saw in my life. Both of them were in the base in Saudi Arabia too. One of them was a submarine that the neighbor kid had don the street. It was about two feet long and it had little guys like miniature army men (about3/4 inch tall) that fit in all the different rooms and compartments. It was pretty sweet.
The other one was a space set that actually belonged to my friend's older brother. It was a space station and all the ships and guys moved around with magnets and the people could go inside the ships and the buildings and everything- all with magnets! I still think about that toy. it seems pretty dangerous to have so many small pieces and magnets and separate moving parts, but maybe that's why i liked it so much. Maybe dangerous toys are always the coolest.

We went to the Lincoln Police Department bike auction today. There were tons of trashed out drug bikes and a boat and some cars. We went hoping to find something suitable for Anna, but ended up leaving before the bidding started because it was so junked. Maybe next month. I think they do these auctions once a month. I keep hoping I'll find some fantastic race bike that got stolen from Warren Buffett or something. (Warren Buffett lives in Omaha. In the same house he grew up in actually.)
So I have some things to say about bikes. I have been working on Anna's and my bikes today.

1) It is usually never worth spending the time and effort to patch a tube. Chances are, the air will leak out of the side of the patch you just spent 5 minutes putting on anyways. It is usually better to keep a spare tube in the house. They only cost between $3 and $5 and are pretty much guaranteed to not have holes in them. A patch kit will cost about $2 to $6 anyways, so its worth using a new tube every now and then especially if you only ride on the road. Considering flat tires are probably the biggest reason people get turned off of biking, this is worth remembering.

2) Unless you ride on loose rocks or on wet grass and mud often, put slick tires on your bike. You will go faster and use less energy in pedaling. It is probably the single best thing to do for a better biking experience.
(a) Buying slick tires might seem like too much effort to put into a bike, but you can get cheap ones for about $10 dollars a tire. There are hundreds of different types for all kinds of purposes, and the difference is phenomenal.
(b) If flat tires really are your biggest problem with biking, there are also kevlar lined tires that will resist thorn and glass punctures and are pretty awesome. They're also a bit more expensive.
(c) Don't ever bother with expensive inner-tubes. I've never tried those slime filled ones that are supposed to clog holes (they kind of seem to work like scabs, and that just seems gross.) Maybe they are good. They probably wouldn't be so great if you plan on riding fast (consistently above 20 mph) as I have heard that the slime inside can throw the balance of the wheel off and it feels wobbly. In any case, don't ever buy expensive tubes. There are the cheap Taiwanese $5 tubes and the expensive bike brand tubes (which are really the same $5 Taiwanese tubes.) Tubes don't make a difference. The tires are crucial.

3) I am a devoted capitalist and I love the free market, but never buy a Walmart/ K-mart/ Target/ Department store bike. Unless it is for a kid. If you are buying a bike for a kid never buy a brand name bike. Department store bikes are heavy, slow, clunky and made with cheap parts that will strip and crack and peel and twist under pressure. Adults use lots of pressure and break their bikes. That's why the police auction is full of junked out Huffys, Roadmasters, and Schwinns (Schwinn used to be an awesome company in the 70's and 80's and old schwinns can be used to make some sweet rides still, but the modern company is a cheap company that bought the name.) To enjoy biking, you need to get a bike that has some quality parts and is built well. For kids though, clunky and solid is good. Also, spending $200 for a two foot long pipe with wheels doesn't sound like good investment skills.

4) Whats with all the mountain bikes? They are pretty comfortable, but they waste so much energy. Never get a bike with shocks. Thats not true. If you get a bike with shocks, realize that you are going to go slow and you will get tired sooner than if you rode without them. Their purpose is to absorb movement, so it will gobble up all the energy used to get the bike actually moving. For bike commuting or weekend rides, when you are riding on the street or paths, shocks will only wear you out and make you hate your life. Also, they add weight. They can be pretty comfortable though, and make any sort of mountain riding nice.

5) Gears are overrated. I am a devoted single speed user now. It is simple and silent. You don't have to worry about maintenance or shifting or anything. For really long rides or racing or whatever, then multiple gears are pretty good, but a single gear is fantastic. It is a lot lighter (by a couple of pounds) and i think it looks cooler. For one of the coolest bikes I have ever seen, check out the OSO Bike. The guy that makes them is a member of the church and it is really cool. It is a single gear and uses a coaster brake (the kind on kids bikes where pushing the pedal backwards makes it stop) so it looks really simple. Also, it has bullhorns. I think they are cool. I hope to get one once I have a job and am get some money.


Biking has become a sport in the U.S. and has lost its practicality. It is more of an outdoor game than anything else. It's so devastating. If you want to get a bike let me know and I'll give you suggestions until you are sick of it. Anna is sick of it. I have been badgering her to get a sweet bike for ages, but she likes my old one. Whatever. Soapers will have fun riding with me.



Well... not much else. I have my dermatologist appointment on monday. I am guessing that I DO have melanoma somewhere. It is at 7:30am (AAAGH!) but thats ok because I'll get to school early and finish up my contracts homework.
I've been thinking, I bet it could be pretty cool to do estate planning and wills as a lawyer. Go all Atticus Finch. He wrote wills. I think it is pretty cool.


We got a movie and oreos and ice cream for tonight. Hopefully Boapers falls asleep soon. We are excited to see you all at Christmas.
I saw the pictures of the house mom. It looks pretty sweet. I ignored the pictures with the tenant's wires and pillows. The deck and kitchen look cool. I am excited to see it in person. Hope it doesn't burn to the ground. If it does, make sure you have no motive or opportunity to have burned it because that is enough evidence needed to prosecute someone for arson. It really is. Thanks first law school memo.

so i got some ice cream that was "white cake" flavor. It has star shaped sprinkles and blue frosting swirls.
I am so blown away.
It is like the time i discovered Google Street View and felt sad for the rest of the day because I knew that no matter what I did with my life, no matter how many people I influenced for good, no matter what my wife and family thought of me, I would never be able to match up to its awesomeness. My life had been trumped by Google.
This is kind of like that, but for ice cream and not really my life. it kind of just trumps any idea I might have for cool ice cream.


Also, I have pills now to kill my TB. Yay. In six months there will only be a 2.5% chance that it will turn active, kill me, and then infect and kill my family and neighbors. It is 7% now. Also, why have no doctors stressed the importance of taking this medicine to me until today in the doctors office?(Mom doesn't count because she stresses the importance of everything, so sometimes its easy to not believe her when she tells me I could die).
Also, why am I not hunting down this Nikolas Kalkbrenner kid who GAVE me this TB infection and asking him why he came to school with tuberculosis?

Hi. I decided I would be a copy cat of you guys. Now I can be a part of this blog thing too.
I was a waster today. I spent 3 hours doing 10 pages of Torts. In some states children can sue their parents for intentional torts. I learned that today and also spent a lot of time on craigslist and reading the drudge report.
on my ride home i saw a creepy little orange dog with no owner, a jet black squirrel, and a rabbit that I usually only see in the mornings. It made me wonder if rabbits have daily patterns and schedules. I am still wondering that. I always see it within 20 feet of the same tree off of the bike path.
This blog is also meant to be competitive with Anna's blog, so feel free to come visit this one to get your fix of Soapers' doings.

For example, I came home after wasting 3 hours of study time at school to find her asleep:
She was asleep for about 20 minutes and then woke up with a vengeance. It is the craziest thing- babies have weird breath. It doesn't really stink or anything, but its funny to have a little baby with its own breath.
Hmmm. I have a spider bite on my arm. I think I would be really scared if I saw a spider bite me, but it never seems to be a big deal when you wake up with a swollen red patch on your arm or whatever.
well, hope you enjoyed this more than Anna's blog.