Just what am I doing with my life?
I am completely clueless..
Monday, December 29, 2014
Sunday, April 21, 2013
A Message From..
So, there was a small celebration at home yesterday for my hatch day. It's was an awkward one since so many things happened at home recently.
Still, I'm grateful that the family celebrated despite the hoo-ha. I even got not one, but two presents! I mean even if it's even one, I should 偷笑 already no?
This morning, I received a text from the aunt. Boy, it was lengthy it should be in a Facebook note instead. Haha!! I see where she is going anyway and I'll try my best to change. Well, at least those points I think made sense. Things is refraining to chao keng from work, I think 我自有分寸.
Till then.
Saturday, April 20, 2013
Think 'cliché title' for This Entry.
This is quite some abandoned blog, ain't it? Actually, I've been wanting to try to do some entry but I guess procrastination got the best of me. Anyway, here I am trying to revive this humble site of mine, 'clearing cobwebs' as I would say when I was younger. Hah, how cliche it sounds now.
I notice something, the times I felt the urge to blog are the times I either feel down or I simply got into trouble. And yeah, you guessed it. This time was for me getting into trouble.
Some incident took place at home a couple of days ago and apparently, I was in the whole picture. I don't want to reveal much but the gist of it is, someone at home had been habitually pocketing valuables and giving it away to others. And to cut the storyline even shorter, Yours Truly was actually receiving the stuffs that the alleged was siphoning from. This whole give-and-take thingy goes on for as long as 2 years, since I decided to move into a distant relative house.
So one fine day, or rather, night, the owner of the valuables caught that someone who was taking her things away. When morning comes, I was awaken by a discussion between another two family members. Obviously, this has become a headline in this family.
Coming back to my point, I was eventually being called out for interrogation by the patriarch of the family. From wanting to know my side of the story, it turned out to be a birthday lecture (yes, this happened on my birthday, when the clock struck twelve) telling me how I wasn't been helpful and proactive to inform such oddities. Then he was advising me about my own family matters and proceeded to voice up about how I wasn't being Christian enough. This actually went on for more than an hour but what can I do but just to listen. I'm not like those who like to rebut or argue, so I just tell myself to endure this lecture till he is done with his piece. Main point here is, I don't want to be rude. He is after all a really really nice guy. I wouldn't be up and running without much of his help.
But some things are left better unspoken. Will just stop this part of the rant as I don't want to be reminded of such stuffs if I were to revisit my old posts in the future.
I feel like I am in a crossroad situation whereby I don't really have a definite aim after NS. I mean I have made a couple of decisions like studying or working. But it's not as simple as it seems. I mean if I were to study, what do I really want to study? To be honest, I actually applied for CIA and UNLV about two months ago. And I just got shortlisted for an interview by the CIA people. But quite frankly, I think I screwed up the interview. Basic thing like how to I do braising I couldn't answer. I don't know if the interviewer who asked me to go back to do a two-page write-up on braising is trying to troll me or seriously giving me another chance to redeem myself. After all, I am a DCCM graduate and such stuff should be at the back of my hand. I was totally embarrassed by how the interview went. Do I really want to take up this course? Am I truly interesting in culinary? In the end, I did my homework and submitted it this morning.
Sometimes, I just felt that I should have just selected UNLV as my first choice. So I don't have to succumb myself into such torture and humiliation.
If I were to get into school, it means I would need to start from as early as late August. This sucks as I only get to ORD this September. What is even suckier is that I actually bought myself a plane ticket to Korea after my ORD together with another friend. How to travel when I have school to go to? I wish there were stuffs such as 分身术. Haha!
Back to the fork road, if I were to start working, where should I go? My first thought is going back to Starbucks. But do I really want to? There've been some unpleasant incident that took place just before I had to leave for NS. What impression would the people see if I were to go back there?
Friends had recommended me to go at their restaurants too. But I feel awkward somehow, working with someone I'm close with. It may not be a good thing after all, I am thinking about attracting biasness and whatnots. Then again, looking for a job outside alone can be quite arduous too.
Speaking about jobs, I thought of not only narrowing my search into the F&B industry. Just now, I was just searching for cabin crew vacancies. Haha! I actually want to work somewhere far away from home - my home as well as the current home. I feel that I should start to be even more independent after I ORD and not rely on others or my accommodation and stuffs like that. Especially like what happened recently. Recruitment for my preferred airline is on June, should I give it a try?
Why am I thinking so much on my birthday?! Can I just let nature take it's course? Or will people see me as 'bo chup' again?
Too much information for this entry. Will try to blog more to prevent such lengthy essays. Moreover, I won't even bother to proofread my entries especially for such draggy posts.
Till then.
I notice something, the times I felt the urge to blog are the times I either feel down or I simply got into trouble. And yeah, you guessed it. This time was for me getting into trouble.
Some incident took place at home a couple of days ago and apparently, I was in the whole picture. I don't want to reveal much but the gist of it is, someone at home had been habitually pocketing valuables and giving it away to others. And to cut the storyline even shorter, Yours Truly was actually receiving the stuffs that the alleged was siphoning from. This whole give-and-take thingy goes on for as long as 2 years, since I decided to move into a distant relative house.
So one fine day, or rather, night, the owner of the valuables caught that someone who was taking her things away. When morning comes, I was awaken by a discussion between another two family members. Obviously, this has become a headline in this family.
Coming back to my point, I was eventually being called out for interrogation by the patriarch of the family. From wanting to know my side of the story, it turned out to be a birthday lecture (yes, this happened on my birthday, when the clock struck twelve) telling me how I wasn't been helpful and proactive to inform such oddities. Then he was advising me about my own family matters and proceeded to voice up about how I wasn't being Christian enough. This actually went on for more than an hour but what can I do but just to listen. I'm not like those who like to rebut or argue, so I just tell myself to endure this lecture till he is done with his piece. Main point here is, I don't want to be rude. He is after all a really really nice guy. I wouldn't be up and running without much of his help.
But some things are left better unspoken. Will just stop this part of the rant as I don't want to be reminded of such stuffs if I were to revisit my old posts in the future.
I feel like I am in a crossroad situation whereby I don't really have a definite aim after NS. I mean I have made a couple of decisions like studying or working. But it's not as simple as it seems. I mean if I were to study, what do I really want to study? To be honest, I actually applied for CIA and UNLV about two months ago. And I just got shortlisted for an interview by the CIA people. But quite frankly, I think I screwed up the interview. Basic thing like how to I do braising I couldn't answer. I don't know if the interviewer who asked me to go back to do a two-page write-up on braising is trying to troll me or seriously giving me another chance to redeem myself. After all, I am a DCCM graduate and such stuff should be at the back of my hand. I was totally embarrassed by how the interview went. Do I really want to take up this course? Am I truly interesting in culinary? In the end, I did my homework and submitted it this morning.
Sometimes, I just felt that I should have just selected UNLV as my first choice. So I don't have to succumb myself into such torture and humiliation.
If I were to get into school, it means I would need to start from as early as late August. This sucks as I only get to ORD this September. What is even suckier is that I actually bought myself a plane ticket to Korea after my ORD together with another friend. How to travel when I have school to go to? I wish there were stuffs such as 分身术. Haha!
Back to the fork road, if I were to start working, where should I go? My first thought is going back to Starbucks. But do I really want to? There've been some unpleasant incident that took place just before I had to leave for NS. What impression would the people see if I were to go back there?
Friends had recommended me to go at their restaurants too. But I feel awkward somehow, working with someone I'm close with. It may not be a good thing after all, I am thinking about attracting biasness and whatnots. Then again, looking for a job outside alone can be quite arduous too.
Speaking about jobs, I thought of not only narrowing my search into the F&B industry. Just now, I was just searching for cabin crew vacancies. Haha! I actually want to work somewhere far away from home - my home as well as the current home. I feel that I should start to be even more independent after I ORD and not rely on others or my accommodation and stuffs like that. Especially like what happened recently. Recruitment for my preferred airline is on June, should I give it a try?
Why am I thinking so much on my birthday?! Can I just let nature take it's course? Or will people see me as 'bo chup' again?
Too much information for this entry. Will try to blog more to prevent such lengthy essays. Moreover, I won't even bother to proofread my entries especially for such draggy posts.
Till then.
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Should I Be Back Here?
Was just skimming through a few post before this and guess what? IT'S THAT LOOOOOOOONG SINCE MY LAST POST. Talk about cleaning the cobwebs.
This, is actually a long overdue post I guess. Been wanting to blog again but there's too much lazybones in me. Moreover, I'm not really good at putting my thought into words. I prefer to just process them in my mind and just let it past or keep dwelling on it depending on what the situation is. I mean, you don't want to think of all those negative stuffs and in the end just emo you life away, right?
I guess I crap too much, I'll get into what I wanna pen out today. That is, about work.
Work has been, ups and downs - but more downs recently I guess. See, I actually talked to Jo about my personal development about a month ago. She agreed to it even though my days in Starbucks is numbered. Numbered because if time is not on my side, I'll be called to serve the nation. In this case, it did really came; right after my assessment day. Talk about coincidence.
So I am practically only going to be a manager for two months. A month was used up of training so technically I'm only serving for 1 month. Of course, it's really hard to break this news to Jo but I still do it - I have to do it. And I thought I could live pass my last few weeks in Starbucks peacefully.
I am damn wrong about it. Recently, an incident took place where I actually wounded my partner during shift. The wound was bad, and I mean it. My poor partner actually didn't notice I had a mug of hot water coming towards her, even though it was right within her sight. Bump into my hands and impacted the water to spill over onto her arm. She was in complete agony, but what can I do? Only to apologize profusely.
Her affected arms immediately changed as if it was acid that I spilled onto her. Luckily I had other partners who tended to her while was in a dilemma of thinking what to do next and to dissolve the crowd that was growing like a dragon. You can say that I'm cruel, but I got no choice but to tame the dragon. What do you expect me to do when I'm so "lucky" to be the only one possessing a till?
It seemed forever for the crowd to disperse, but I immediately to the back room to get myself updated of my injured partner situation. I knew I in for more trouble when she told me she wanted to leave first. She was obviously hurt and I could do nothing but to say sorry. She is obviously not okay even though she kept reassuring me that she was. My mind was just so fucked up suddenly.
Just a couple of hours after ending my work, I received a call from Jo. She asked me something that I thought was redundant and ridiculous.
"Did you say sorry to her?"
Wouldn't that be the first thing you should do after you hurt someone?! Why wouldn't I do that? I may not be totally at fault but hey, apologizing should be the priority, no?
I just said yes, I did apologize umpteen times and I even went to great lengths to give my side of the story. However, that wasn't the point.
Here is the reason: She was told by a partner that I showed no concern towards the wounded and I acted nonchalant about it JUST BECAUSE HE/SHE DIDN'T FUCKING SEEN ME DO SO. The moment I heard about this I was really pissed off. Just because he/she didn't get to see if I did really apologize to her doesn't mean I didn't, right!?
Actually, I'm lost of words. I was just blacklisted by partners just because I've made a folly and you didn't see me being repentant with your fucking eyes. Here I am being so remorseful about what happened and I actually get this kind of feedback from my peers. How is this even fair to me?
Until today, I still didn't have the chance to find out who was the one who made such a fallacious remark. I'll confront this person as soon as I know it and I'll make sure he/she get his/her fucking facts right.
Right now, my mind is full of guesses but I'm trying real hard not to jump into a conclusion. I wouldn't wanna be a pot calling a kettle black.
'nough of this shit. FUCK YOU!!
P.S.: I don't know why is this particular partner giving me this cold shoulder and I can't help but to think she is actually the one that got me in the bad light. Whatever it is, I just feel that she lacks the professionalism here. I mean, you shouldn't be throwing your attitude around and especially towards me for no fucking reason. I'm not your slave, even they have human rights. If you are going to continue with such fucked up attitude, please I'd rather you strip off your apron and leave. I don't need a fucking AP partner during my shift.
P.S.S.: I think what I blogged now should be voiced out. Or should I? Since my days are actually numbered in that store.
P.S.S.S.: Note to self, please start to work out now okay? Going in without at least such preparations may just kill me inside. kthxbai.
Monday, March 29, 2010
Day 15 (Countdown: 125 days left)
Lunch was full house, even on a Monday. Took care of one big table of 12. WTF... Take orders also perspire until like working under the sun lidat. Dropped a knife and nearly kena a lady. Damn. Went to do other things, then in the end never inform other staffs, then a few dishes was out late. Lols. But at least nothing major happened la.
Dinner was okay, served the lounge, celebrated a lady's birthday. Then go in help to do settings for tomorrow's breakfast. WTF, its breakfast and have to report at 7am. DAMN!!!
Thats why, I must go sleep now. Legs are crying already, mind is gonna turn off..
Dinner was okay, served the lounge, celebrated a lady's birthday. Then go in help to do settings for tomorrow's breakfast. WTF, its breakfast and have to report at 7am. DAMN!!!
Thats why, I must go sleep now. Legs are crying already, mind is gonna turn off..
Day 14 (Countdown:126 days left)
Tired! Work like a straight shift lidat, close to 12 hours man... Lazy to type liao... Anyway, nothing much happened.
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Day 13 (Countdown: 127 days left)
One more day down. Today is busy, but not as busy as yesterday. As usual, I'm just floating around the whole restaurant. clearing plates, serving food, etc... Nothing special in particular. Lols.
Oh ya, today during lunch. I felt like I own the bar lidat. Coz I did most of the drinks wor. Wahaha!!! Its really fun lah! Ya, maybe that is the only yayness for today. Lols.
Tired is the word lahh...
Oh ya, today during lunch. I felt like I own the bar lidat. Coz I did most of the drinks wor. Wahaha!!! Its really fun lah! Ya, maybe that is the only yayness for today. Lols.
Tired is the word lahh...
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Day 12 (Countdown: 128 days left)
Busy, damn busy. I felt like shit now, not that I screwed anything up. But really, this company pays shit and demands super quality work from us. Like WTF... Looking at the calendar makes me wanna tear it up, coz the days are passing by too slowly!!!
I'm tired of being the flyer boy,
I'm tired of that Collin wannabe,
I'm tired of the split shifts,
I'm tired of looking at the restaurants,
I'm tired of the big ones,
I'm tired of all the sai kang,
The lists goes on...
Super Duper Uber FML!!!
I'm tired of being the flyer boy,
I'm tired of that Collin wannabe,
I'm tired of the split shifts,
I'm tired of looking at the restaurants,
I'm tired of the big ones,
I'm tired of all the sai kang,
The lists goes on...
Super Duper Uber FML!!!
Thursday, March 25, 2010
Day 11 (Countdown: 129 days left)
Its a sucky day... Was out almost the whole day giving out flyers... What do they really take me as sia? Promoter on the streets ar? Lidat, I rather don't work in the restaurant, I'm better off as a roadshow promoter lor. Sucky job.
Today Joel kena cut by glass and was bleeding profusely. The best thing? Nobody cares. Like seriously. I tried to get help, but everyone tried to act nonchalant about it. Like WTF? a person is hurt quite seriously but no one came and offered help. Find one first aid box also need to take eons. If people unconscious le how? Just throw the body aside ar? What kind of welfare is that sia? Now I really damn worried if I were to kena injured, lidat how sia. Some more go see doctor also nobody help call. I dunno company is got doctor de or what la, but luckily he managed to go some where to get his hand treated. Piang eh, what kind of a lousy organisation is this sia? If I die there (touchwood) I think nobody will care also lor.
As usual, ask we work overtime. Damn it la, not a single day I can go home on time de. DAMN HATE THIS SYSTEM!!!
FML... OTL
Today Joel kena cut by glass and was bleeding profusely. The best thing? Nobody cares. Like seriously. I tried to get help, but everyone tried to act nonchalant about it. Like WTF? a person is hurt quite seriously but no one came and offered help. Find one first aid box also need to take eons. If people unconscious le how? Just throw the body aside ar? What kind of welfare is that sia? Now I really damn worried if I were to kena injured, lidat how sia. Some more go see doctor also nobody help call. I dunno company is got doctor de or what la, but luckily he managed to go some where to get his hand treated. Piang eh, what kind of a lousy organisation is this sia? If I die there (touchwood) I think nobody will care also lor.
As usual, ask we work overtime. Damn it la, not a single day I can go home on time de. DAMN HATE THIS SYSTEM!!!
FML... OTL
Day 10 (Countdown: 130 days left)
Today was at inside again. After giving out flyers, went back and buddy with Kim. First thing I did already got mistake. Lols, I poured iced water into a glass of sparkling. Die. After that, was like looking blur but still doing my job la. Still got problem recognising dishes, haiz...
Went to break on time, yay. Then wanna start dinner shift le Kim actually went through the service sequence with me. Then gave me feedbacks. I feel she is like outside cool, inside actually is warm de ba. After working with her got like 10 days, this is what I feel la. Wahaha!!!
Dinner got event sia. Was made to serve at the cocktail reception. Held the beverage tray for like 1298329582052 minutes. Arm aching siol... After that, buddy with Joel at the alfresco. Kept praising me for helping him. Lols. I was thinking I got so good meh? OTL
Knocked off at 11.20pm when I should be out at 10pm. Damn that event. Siannnnn... Bah, lazy to blog already..
Went to break on time, yay. Then wanna start dinner shift le Kim actually went through the service sequence with me. Then gave me feedbacks. I feel she is like outside cool, inside actually is warm de ba. After working with her got like 10 days, this is what I feel la. Wahaha!!!
Dinner got event sia. Was made to serve at the cocktail reception. Held the beverage tray for like 1298329582052 minutes. Arm aching siol... After that, buddy with Joel at the alfresco. Kept praising me for helping him. Lols. I was thinking I got so good meh? OTL
Knocked off at 11.20pm when I should be out at 10pm. Damn that event. Siannnnn... Bah, lazy to blog already..
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