Isn't She Beautiful...

Losing weight sucks. And apparently my body has decided to hold onto everything again. Dang it.

There is something that has been weighing heavily on my mind lately. And it is something that has come around in my life these last few years several times. In order to get to where you want to be and do what you wish to do- you have to learn to be your very own advocate.

Working out can be daunting if it hasn't been a part of your life in a long while. It can be overwhelming and scary stepping into a gym, or class. Trying out a new video is embarrassing, even if no one is there to watch you flap your arms in desperation while your flab flies in defiance.

Working out can be hard.


Finding a work out partner puts a lot of these unfounded worries aside for the time being. My workout partners in my past have become my best friends. I adore them. Even if I'm not working out with them anymore- they are still very important influences in my life.

But here's the thing... we can't put our health and lifestyle on our partners. They are our friends and confidants. They are there to support us and push us along the journey through hell... But they aren't the one that can do the work for you.

Only you can do that.

Only I can do that.

There will be a time when we will all have a "coming to Jesus" moment when it comes to getting healthy. If you haven't found that yet, you will.

I had mine- not too long ago. It was one of the biggest motivators for me to start this detox journey.

This epiphany is the moment when you realize that yes, I LOVE MY WORK OUT PARTNER- BUT... but if my workout partner can not work out with me today or tomorrow- it doesn't give me the day off.

Yep- I just changed from second to first person there. It was intentional. ;) 

Learn to love yourself enough to know that you can do it- with or with out your work out partner. Be your best friend. Push yourself. Enjoy the journey along the way. It's a long road ... and will be a lonely one if you don't start trusting yourself to be your own cheerleader.

I know that if I can figure this out myself- then you can too.

When you have your own moment of wisdom I want to hear about it. Not some story about pretending you had that moment- but truly. DEEP DOWN had that moment.

Only YOU can change YOUR life.



And I know you can do it if I have been doing it too.

Because guess what- YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL... AND guess what. Reaching beast mode on your own in the gym... it's a beautiful thing. :)

Today I weigh 220 pounds. (Pic was from last week.) I started integrating normal foods back into my diet because I got concerned about the amount of weight loss I was experiencing. 12 pounds so far this month. My worry was that I would gain it all back once I started eating wheat and dairy again. I still eat paleo for the most part- but am not so nazi about it anymore.

The detox worked.

It curbed my cravings and I'm under control again.

And I've learned and developed some new habits. :) I say it was a success.

But more about my final thoughts a little later.

I truly hope that you take what I have said into your hearts. I know the frustration of giving up, and I know the fear of doing it alone. It is an irrational fear and you DESERVE better.

You deserve to be healthy.

You deserve to have the confidence to KNOW you can do it on your own.

Love Nichole- another mama who has had to learn the hard way that she too is worth it.

Here's the link in case it doesn't work. :)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X5EywDV0DRo&feature=youtu.be

I will just let my video do all the talking for me. Please ignore the pampered chef pan... that baked our chicken- the only thing we ate!

For the most part everything else has been... satisfactory. I have found some favorites. Okay, I'm lying... I actually haven't yet- but at least I am surviving right?

I thank the good Lord every day I started purchasing thrive freeze dried fruit however. It's the only thing keeping me alive when I have moments like the video above shows. ;)

You know that new song out by Rhianna and Eminem? Monster? WELL... Lets just say you don't need to be afraid of him any longer. Oh no.

Be afraid of ME.

I HATE getting off of sugar- but what's worst? I have never gotten off of sugar, dairy AND wheat at the same time before.

I am freaking frothing at the mouth.

Frothing I say.

I am the thing that as a young child you fear is in the dark. I am the thing that you see in the corner of your eye when home alone watching a scary movie.

I am the creature hiding in your closet that you hear scratching in your subconscious while you lie there sleeping.

I hope I don't ever have to feel this way ever again.
(And lets be honest, you are hoping I don't ever describe THAT again...)



I woke up this morning completely broken out and having to pee like a pregnant woman all night long. I don't think I have ever felt so water logged... probably a sign I haven't been drinking enough water for a long time.

What we ate last night for dinner was a cleansing type dinner.

The colon cleansing type.

It did NOTHING to me. (Thank goodness, right? haha!) But sadly my husband went to bed singing a completely different tune. Makes me laugh a little right now just thinking about the hell I am putting him through.

Muwahaha!

He has also been popping antacids like candy.

Funny since we have been cutting a lot of crap out- but hopefully he'll see a difference in a week.

I'm just hoping I SURVIVE the rest of the week!!!! (Wait? Is that tomorrow? ha! I wish! It's Feb. 1st.)

What are some of your treats that don't include wheat, dairy, or sugar? Besides apples and some sort of nut butter- cause... I've had my fill of butter... and nuts. HA!

Oh goodness... and with that I bid you adieu! And I'm sure I will type something tomorrow since supposedly tomorrow is supposed to be WORSE!!!!

WHAT THE "H"- why am I doing this to myself, again???

And just for farts and giggles- enjoy my day two montage.


LOONEY I TELL YA- I'm going looney.