While headed to Target on my lunch break Friday, one of my tires blew out.
But God provided once again. As I was getting off the road and turning into a parking lot, I noticed another vehicle was following me. Turns out the fellow motorist was not, in fact, a serial killler. He saw my tire and as I was getting out he told me, "I'm going to change your tire." WELL PRAISE GOD!!! I was already dreading having to call roadside assistance and waiting for them to show up.
A year ago last week , we had a terrible wreck at church. Pastor preached "Trust God To Do What Is Right" (which was incredibly fitting). My last note that I wrote down was "God is not fair.... He is always right because He is a righteous God." The message was good and he was about to end it but he felt the need to deal with something that he picked up in some people's attitudes. That lengthened the message a bit which also kept us back from heading to our cars and hanging around in the parking lot as usual.
Then we had altar call and then announcements. During this, we heard what sounded like several loud crunches. At that point, I knew that my car was hit. I had been having a weird feeling that my car was going to be in an accident. While driving, I would feel paranoid that someone would sideswipe me. So my mind was in that frame. The day before, I was coming home from work and there was wreck on the highway. For a while, we could not move at all. I remember sitting there and seeing myself in my mind driving a black SUV. Why did I get these premonitions? I think God was being extremely undeservedly generous to me. He was preparing my mind for all of this.
Some of the men went out and someone said, "Jennifer's car was hit" but they didn't yet realize about six other cars were hit. Three of those plus mine were totaled. And a pedestrian lost his life.
What happened- some teenage guys were speed racing on the street. A 19 year old hit the pedestrian, lost control of his vehicle, flew into our church parking lot at a high speed hitting several vehicles and ended up in the empty space next to my car.
We didn't get to leave until 3am-ish due to the crime scene situation.
So this month has me feeling like my mind is replaying all that went down last year. I dealt with anger with the accident. God isn't fair, as stated above. I'm really trying to be a better steward and was happy because I had just paid off my car. And now this happens?! Why?!?
I'm a Dave Ramsey fan and I didn't want to a have a car payment again but yet I didn't want to be stuck with a vehicle that needed constant repairs. So thankfully, I was able to get a used vehicle with low mileage and a great warranty. But I still felt like I failed in a way.
Also in August of last year, my awesome supervisor announced that she'd be resigning soon. That was a tough blow. And then I was having issues with new management for situations that I had nothing to do with. God isn't fair.
Also in August we had some annoying family/houseguests that constantly woke me up too early with loud talking due to them being used to eastern time zone :)
It was just a stinky month! And the work problems carried over for over 6 months. I was anticipating being laid off for no other reason but that they were fickle. God is not fair.
So. It's been a journey. I've learned that we can be wronged but instead of pointing fingers at others, we need to respond in love and let God work things out. He has a way of wiping away fear and anxiety when we exhibit His love. I've learned and am still learning how much His strength is perfect in my weakness. I've prayed that I just can't wrap my mind around that concept and I'm reminded that it's only His strength that could have brought me this far.
Posts
