Stuff That Makes Us Hillarys

Today the world is in a storm fury.

It's cold, and foreboding.

Graveyard week at work doesn't help much..

Missing my kids

(can you hear the poor me?) (WAA!)

Then I looked at my daughter Mandy's blog

and found this:

...and the sun came out - and the birds were singing,

and I found joy.

In 114 days I get to hold this little handsome boy.

To tell him that I've been waiting for him forever.

To promise him that he is always going to be loved.

Then the music of Mandy's blog came on,

it was from Collective Soul the song was....

ADORED.

And so you are...

I feel the warmth of God on my face,

and in my heart.

I am reminded of the miracle of life,

and love,

and children.

Today I'm thankful.

Just Thankful.

... and have some fun...

you both deserve it!

fresh from the airport - both exhausted

but you wouldn't know that 'cuz

I'm just seein' those smiles.

Yesterday on my countdown it said 30 days and so many minutes and so many seconds.... so it wasn't actually 30 days - so I had to wait and post this at 11:59 which is as close as I could post to 30 days left.  It use to be years, then a year, then months, and now days... slow and sure.  He's fought a long battle, he's won some and lost some, but returns with honor in my eyes.  Leaving a sweet trail of memories - and years, almost 2 years.  I ache for the day I get to hug him.  Yet I will linger a bit in thought for that last day of being a Missionary Mom, and the blessings that  have accompanied that honor.  It's like - I've done all that I'm suppose to do on the Mommy list - all the kids in the temple, the 3 that are married have been married in the temple, the son's that belong to Heavenly Father have served their missions.  What does the mommy do now?  She gets a new name.... Nana, and the fun continues.  Now that you've read this it's 29:somethin somethin.... and counting.  (could a mom love her kids more?  nope)

Be afraid, very afraid

I smell tea a brewin'

(and it's sour)

Pistol Bristol is on the wolf hunt.

I hope Glen Beck's children

aren't on next season.

I seriously thought I was watching

the biggest loser...

(oh wait - I am!)

ew... please - bring in the clowns


OH WAIT - I am thankful for...
(because I have to be thankful for something)
the freedom to vote.
And to rig that vote if needed.
Do you want lemon with that tea?

Michael is a given name that comes from the Hebrew: מִיכָאֵל / מיכאל‎ (Mikha'el), derived from the Hebrew question מי כמו אלוהים? My Kmo Alohim? meaning "Who is like God?"^[1] In English, it is sometimes shortened to Mike, Mikey, or, especially in Ireland, Mick. Today it's for "M"y GOSH - he's home on leave - (thank you spirit in the sky)

Ryan is a common Irish surname, as well as being a common given name.

There are several possible origins for the surname. In certain cases it can be a simplified from of Mulryan. In some cases the surname may be derived from the Irish Gaelic Ó Riagháin (modern Irish Ó Riain), meaning "descendant of Rian"; or Ó Maoilriain "descendant of Maoilriaghain", or Ó Ruaidhín "descendant of the little red one".  The old Gaelic personal name Rian is of uncertain origin. It may be derived from the Gaelic rí, meaning "king". Today - it means Happy Birthday!!!

I knew that when I had my daughters that I would one day pray that they would be tenderly cared for and loved forever.  Lucky for me (and for them) they found their soul mates - and they are divine....  Never have I questioned their choices, never have I loved two handsome gentlemen so much, never did I know I would see the kind of love they have for my baby girls.  I think that we need to just start dropping that 'in-law' part - because these two - are my sons.  Welcome Home Mike (a most excellent soldier), and Happy Birthday Ryan (a most excellent law student)  Yer Bob - loves you.

Not to forget some Friday Night fun...

My (beautiful)(one of several) Niece Erin
is a Cheerleader for Mountain Crest.

Their football team were playing in the state
playoff games at the U of U.
She is a Senior this year...

and is just as cute as can be.....

I actually went to just see her -
but apparently there was an incredible

underdog team (Mountain Crest) vs the
Super Dawgs (Bountiful).

The papers had Bountiful winning everything...
but Mountain Crest kept up with them and the
outcome left the Bountiful Braves crying on

the bus ride home.... so sad.  whaddeva....

It was SO fun being there with
my Brother, his cute wife and my

MOM - and it was freaking cold....

Party continues this Friday... Go Mustangs

Wait - I'm from Sky View - what do I care -

I'll just cheer for the cheerleaders

Erin - of course is the Red Headed - orange bowed - babe.

Love love love her.
Afterwards I took my mom up to Cache Valley,
via her first In and Out adventure,
listening to the Jazz Game,
throwing fries all over the car excited,
kinda ride home.  Perfect.

... and this one - only has 5 e-mails left and

then I get him home.... We have him in disguise...

because he's so cute - people will be jealous....

These two are holding out on a secret
BOY name - punkers..
And these two .... well - eat your hearts out.
(Thanks Matt and Bethany for these angels)

Grateful for a weekend of good times.
Grateful for my little tiny world.
Grateful that I found the
Almond Joy - Trick or Treat
candy bars... hidden for a
later date.... mmmm

Just a quick thankful note

before I move forward into this day....

I'm thankful that as of this moment my mom

lives at least 150 miles away

or I would kill her.  I love her.... 

just can't get through to her.

Horrible Horrible Horrible disease called

'old age' it killing her - and me.

 Please remember that the contract

for me being hit by a fast moving semi

at the age of 65 (or sooner if needed)

is under my mattress.....  (loff you mom)

Mike said my picture I posted on Facebook was depressing.... sorry.  Just wanted to capture somethin' sweet.  He likes this one though - so I'll honor him today with using something he likes... this picture and my daughter.  Missin' him something awful - praying for him EVERYDAY.  Can there be any greater sacrifice??  There had to exist a great bond between these two before any of this could happen.  It's even stronger now.  Oh the stories they'll tell their ginger babied Tommy Hawkers.  Mike we miss your massive presence in our lives.  You represent the good that comes from service, the bravery needed for what you do, and the tender sweetness that captivates my daughter's heart.  Now if you'll just give me a few days to locate the exact picture I wanted to use... you, Halloween, nothing but a red (way to small) plastic Speedo..... and I believe it was really really cold that night.  Today I'm grateful for my (and each of your) Veterans.  To Mike - and his sweet wife, and his family who also honors Brayton today -  you are full of awesomeness.  Thank you....   (and thanks to my Uncle Jay and My DAD!!)  Cheer yours on today, they deserve it in every way.

 
PS.... Yesterday - I was not thankful for anything.... in case you were keeping track.  (:  Ok - I guess I was thankful that I found my Jack Skeleton gloves in the pocket of my winter coat, and a miniature Heath candy bar from last Halloween.... there - I'm grateful.

Just as suuppper dooooper excited as I can get... Just as I thought we might get him home alive - he's transferred to Nogales!    I am GOING to find something to be grateful for.... let me see... um..... ok - how about this:

"I am grateful that because 20 people were killed in the streets of this bustling border town last week, there is an enforced curfew..."

Oh... let's hope it's 4:00 PM.....for at least the next 38 days.

I believe that I am VERY guilty of over-praying somethings.... like:  "Heavenly Father - please give my children challenges to build their trust, character, and gun toting skills, so that when danger comes instead of staring it straight in the eyes.... they run like heck to the closest 7-11"  I did hear that they leave the tall blond ones alone there.... it's the 4'11" Spanish companion he'll have to keep close under his wing.  He e-mailed me indicating that 'all valuables have been mailed home....'  He does get a 4 wheel drive truck though.... side armor incorporated.  Well, he'll come home a beautiful chocolate man that's for sure! (:  I am grateful for the power to call down angels to protect my children, my in-law children, and my ever so freaking cute grandchildren.  (Please note all exits.... locate YOUR 7-11 today)  (Yes Ashley, you may point your two fingers toward the exits... thank you)   (like um... this is NOTHING right Mike?  (gotta love my daughter's soldier))

PS - Thank you Ryan M for reminding me that - these places are the sweetest ever - and that you only had a gun held to your head twice while serving. 

BTW - Nogales - in Spanish comes from the word walnut.... and if you know my family - we'll have a blast with that one... (Mandy - did that crack you up?)

So today - Monday - I wanted SO MUCH to be grateful for something - I'M REALLY TRYING HARD today  - should be easy but not in my can o nast world.  I was grateful for yesterday - does that count?  I was grateful that the wind didn't blow my golden leaves off no matter how hard it tried!   So today - Monday - work day, just like that last 6 days so nothing out of the ordinary - except I work with an interesting person and 'it' was on a rampage today.  Hurting 'itself' along the way with 'it's ' comments.  You might think that I should say hurting me - but I feel that when ever someone goes on a rant, they only hurt themselves.  I'm pretty thick skinned, from past scaring to the heart, so I decided to kindly stand there and take it.  (My multiple took over and protected the rest of us inside from the rant).  When 'it' was finished I said - well, I guess I should work on that.  No angered response, no finger pointing, no revenge.  I was already damaged goods when I arrived so it didn't matter really what was presented to me today at 3:45 am.....  I decided to rather focus on a quote that is quickly becoming part of my morning mantra (learning a new one each day)... it's by Elder F Enzio Busche - where among about 15 different things I focused on this one:  "Never judge anyone, if you accept this you will be free.  In the case of your own children or subordinates, where you have the opportunity or responsibility to judge, help them to become their own judge."  So even though I wanted to say - have a great day you freaking wench of a person.... I didn't, and I actually didn't even think of it.  I rejoiced in the concept that mean people will have whatever they say to someone else, will have it come back to them 10 fold one day.  (thus, The Color Purple) I'm just sayin.  Today I'm grateful that I am judged by a far greater judge, one more worthy to judge, and who judges me out of love, so that I can return back to him someday.  (oh - and I'm grateful for snow... and hot chocolate)

So you know on those tear off calendars where you have the cutzie little thought and the date - and then you rip it off and the next day is there.  When you get to Saturday and Sunday - it's a combined page...?  I'm combining my gratitude page - to read Thurs/Fri...

Yesterday on the Thurs part of  Thurs/Fri - Mandy and I kept each other company in the car during her lunch hour, laughing and talking over a 5 buck pizza and left over root beer from the Halloween festivities.  Sweet wigglin' belly was there also, he likes his Grandma.  It's fun talking to that Mandy Girl... I remember having that much energy and excitement about life.

Yesterday, in the afternoon part of Thurs/Fri I received a package from my cute daughter in law Bethany with some GRANDBABY pictures.... dang - all of you just eat your hearts out - I win.   Ashley was on a business trip to their friendly state and she made sure that Andy said, "I love you Nanna!" a couple of times on the phone to me - he says that like a pro.  Made my day.

Last night, in the latter part of Thurs/Fri, my cute neighbor Joni brought me a bundt cake from 'Nothing Bundt Cakes.  I was trying to make her day - but she turned it around and made my day - Thankful for cute skinny running amazing friends... and her spirit, and her friendship, and her time spent on little old me yesterday.

Today - on the Friday part of Thurs/Fri I hit a wall.  Not with the car or the bike or heaven forbid the Harley... just emotionally.  So I'm just pluggin' my gratitude for the power of prayer.  I feel SO bad that he has to listen to me go on and on and on and on.... and then on again.  But he knew this day was coming and he was ready for me to come on bended knee.  Did he answer all of my questions?  No - but that's the beauty of it - I put it out there to him with all the faith I have in him... and then I wait, and trust,  and work towards my goals, and realize that all around me he in answering my pleas in his own way and time.  I wonder what kind of Bundt cake he would like me to send to him?  Something heavenly for sure.  Today - I'm grateful for Thur/Fri and that hopefully I'll see a better Sat/Sun. 

Now you might think that I am forgetting that I have 4 kids, not 3.  But today I'm sharing a special day with my 3rd child, The Mandy.  Now if there was a way to download the messages on my phone left there by Mandy - you would (and Elaine I'll steal this famous line from you my friend....) have coffee comin' outta yer nose laughing.  Most of them are so hysterical that I play them over and over - I've saved them from clear back in 2008.... seriously - my phone messages are always full because I save the messages from my kids.  Elder Hillary's is on there from the day before he left - a message to me - to play any day any time.  Mandy's are always in some foreign voice... or opera singing lady, or "WHY DO YOU HATE ME" voice.... indescribable... but on the hardest days... I play every single one of them.  Ashley left me her Morphine call after her root canal, and Matt's is when he was doing donuts in the BYU parking lot after the first snowfall.... no doubt - probably right in front of a cop.  I love messages from Andy - coached by his mom and dad - messages to Nanna... could there be anything sweeter?  Today I called the 3rd child and used my SkELeTonZ voice and reminded her that because of  circumstances....we were the only Hillarys in the State of Utah right now - WHAT'S WITH THAT?  So tomorrow - we are meeting up for some serious picnicking in the car during her lunch time..We know how to have a good time eh?  Well, I thought it was a good idea until I noticed that the 3rd child had swallowed a watermelon .... What the heck... Looks like a 20 week old spawn growing inside my beautiful #3.... The day you call me to tell me you've had this baby boy... make sure you leave a message - so I can play it over and over again.  XOXOXO

 I'm grateful today that the #3 child is having the #3 grandchild,
and for the 3 messages it took

for her to sing me happy birthday last year
because she 'wasn't done singing it yet'.

 ....... because it must have been difficult voting behind that bear skin attached to the tree and all.....   Did a little votin' today - I never vote straight anything - I like to mix it all up and make my own cup o tea out of the whole mess.  I vote - because women didn't get to for a long time - and I get to every time - so to honor those that didn't get  chance - I vote.  I don't like the 'early voting' - I mean - what's the fun in that?  I love the crisp November air waking up your responsibility gene... and then remembering that you need to return the movie to the library that is over due.... and you look for some new ones.... and then - oh ya - I'm here to VOTE!!  I avoid with all my might - those pollsters standing right in front of the doors - in my way - and NO I don't have an opinion - I HAVE A VOTE TO CAST - so move aside.  Inside - I get my sticker first - I haven't voted yet - and I could just run out the door with my sticker... like those little old ladies would chase me down.  Loved writing my name upside down on the register.  Loved having my name announced like I was royalty, but actually hearing it said wrong made me double check to see if I brought the correct fake ID... you know the one... where is actually says that I weigh a certain amount, but I really don't.  I look at the names on the list... in my mind I'm hearing the debates, the mud slinging, the mud slinging, and the mud slinging.  I don't vote for either one of those people.... I don't like ANY of the judges - so I voted NO for all of them - it's just a popularity vote anyway, they all look the same in those robes so it doesn't matter to me who's wearing them.  I voted for one person because a little old lady said I should, and since she's been around a lot longer than I have - I gave that vote to her.  I did think that I wanted a change - but then again - I remember the LAST person that said we would have a change, and he won, and the only thing that's changed is where he lives now, while other people are losing their homes and also living somewhere else.  So, I voted - I wanted the sticker because at the 'SWEET TOOTH FAIRY' cupcake store if you brought in your sticker... they gave you a free cupcake.  On the way home from my bike ride tonight I passed a cop on a motorcycle with his radar up.... I stopped and asked him if he was trying to catch those people that didn't vote.... He actually smiled and said yes..... and I said, "and if they didn't do you pull out the other gun?  and he actually laughed again..... I love popo's.   I'm really excited that I cast my vote BEFORE my bike ride because I passed the 9 million (it's voting season I can exaggerate if I want) 'VOTE FOR ME BECAUSE MY OPPONENT IS A CRIMINAL!   Had I known, I may have been swayed to vote for this sign, pounded in between the row of signs.... "CALL ME I'LL PUT YOUR CHRISTMAS LIGHTS UP!"  Hey - seriously - it's all location location location.....  So - I love voting - tonight I'm also voting that Bristol Palin gets kicked off of Dancing with the Stars.   I think everyone I voted for today will win because - my vote counts right?   I can't hear you?  Today I'm thankful for the opportunity to vote, and to bring home that coveted sticker to add with the other one I have that simple states:  "Don't blame me I didn't vote for Obama".  Voting - it's a good thing.  PS.... my ballot was incomplete - I couldn't find Spock on it anywhere....  If you haven't already voted - duh - the poles are now closed..... are you still in the Library looking for movies?  BAZINGA!

Well, things have been a bit tough going around the farm lately.  Not complaining - just being real.  I went to check out the fridge and it was looking back at me saying - hey - remember when you use to pack me full?  That's when there were a lot more mouths to feed.  There's still enough in there for the empty nesters - it's just that it looked deserted.  I closed the door, and thought for a moment how really full my cup is in life.  That gratitude is such a filler to my soul.  How very blessed I am for so many little things that add up to be enormous things in my life. With Mr. Hillary on the site of another continent, and coming home to absolute quietness (because the birds pout when he's gone and they're very quiet), I thought of the strength of my daughter Ashley - never complaining, just looking to the future, and the joy it will bring.  Looking at my son Matt's cute Mickey and Minnie.... I felt my heart fill with grandma smiles.  As I reached over and felt Mandy's tummy as she is harboring no doubt a beautiful spawn....my soul remembered carrying her.  Today - I remembered Elder Hillary, as he shared with me that he would return home 4 days sooner, meaning a reset on my blog counter at the right....and there's something to be seriously grateful for... even though it's only 4 days, remember, the last time I saw him just about 2 years ago he was just leaving the hospital - and the look on his face cannot be erased from my mind.  For my Savior... there are not enough words of gratitude for his sacrifice for silly old me.  I'm not sure I was worth all of that - but I'm sure glad he still loves me through all of the years of mistakes and stumbles I've made.

Now and then I make a good choice, one was marrying Mr. Hillary.  Then again, I made 4 more excellent choices, my beautiful kids, and they returned the favor by marrying wonderful, beautiful spouses... and are bringing in the next generation to love.  Today my cup is full.   I've got a few more up my sleeve - I'll share them with you as I go through this month - as I need to look up somehow - and Gratitude seems to be a good place to start looking up.  Happy November... happy 46 days left for Elder Hillary,  almost 1/2 way for Mandy and Ryan, 2 weeks for Ashley and Mike, and many giggles and grins for Matt, Bethany, Em and Drewski.... I love you all.  What's on your gratitude plate?