Fertile Thoughts

Unbelievable! I'm pregnant. 6.3 weeks. I mostly just very tired, fabrics irritate me to death. I dread getting dressed out of pjs, very sensitive breasts,bloated, etc.
o.k. I want to take to really take my time writing this so i can record notes for my own sake.I was incredibly emotional and angry during the 2ww. Like super irritable. My poor family...maybe its just hormones or what but I was pretty scary to be around. I took the hcg shots on P+3,5,7,8 just I could get done with it faster. On P+11,12,13 the test strip was about the same fairly faint but you can see the positive line clearly. On P+14  in the AM I took a test with FMU and it was extremely faint so I cried and cried and told dh I'm sorry for saying I think I'm pregnant when I'm not. So I was waiting for AF to arrive and then I thought later that afternoon why not test again just in case because it was weird for me to see a faint line that many days after a shot. Anyways, it was clearly positive after a few minutes. I was shocked! The only time I get that clear test line is when its the real deal. So, I told dh about it and really thought I was. Then he drove out the next morning as mentioned before (in our snowy unplowed neighborhood) to buy me another box of tests. It was positive! I was thrilled. I went and  got my blood drawn on P+15 and it was 75. PPVI wanted another draw two days later. It was 255. I went and got it drawn again on P+21 I think and it was 2550. I am very excited. Our kids are excited, Lou is excited. I can't believe it! This baby is due Sept. 17, 2017.
I kind of surprised by the negative comments I have received and I am trying not to take it to heart. Obviously I have my own self doubts about how I am I going to be a good mom to that many little ones? I really do feel overwhelmed right now. I don't think I do a good job homeschooling or keeping my house clean. How am I suppose to balance everything. I wish I could get some advice on this because I want to find a method that works for us.
 Also, I really needed to lose weight before getting pregnant again. I feel like I hide from all my friends because of being overweight now. I truly am embarrassed by it. I could cry thinking about how big I'm going to get, just because each pregnancy is getting incredibly hard with my body falling apart. I'm not complaining, I'm just worried about my health in general...

This is mostly for my own notes. HCG can stay in your system until P+14. A very faint line at least. I'm just waiting now for AF to arrive because if it's a very faint line after poas than it's a neg for me. I took my last shot on P+8 and have watched the line get lighter ever since. Believe it or not I still feel incredibly disappointed and cried about it this morning. I have been so crazy hormonal. This includes major carb cravings, irritability, anxiety, panic attacks, fatigue, mood swings. I HATE these symptoms and so does my family. I'm sorry for them. The HCG did help somewhat with the PMS symptoms as I didn't really suffer and depression this time around.

I HATE TTC!
And so that's it. Until next next cycle.

I actually poas this evening just to watch the fading of the sticks....but hopefully not fading :)

Once again I'm in the 2WW. I feel like I've already written this post before. Last cycle my literal phase lasted until p+5. I was taking Chinese herbs. I had a cycle review with PPVI and they put me on hcg to extend my luteal  phase. So I'm taking Chinese herbs with shots and praying this helps. Either way I had severe pms symptoms last month so I'm hoping the shots will help with pms at the least.

Yes, I can't believe I am typing this four the fourth time, amazing! I am 7 weeks pregnant now. I seriously had a couple of negative tests before I got a positive test on P+13,14,15...and finally a blood test on P+16 my results were 429, HURRAY! we are so excited and grateful for this blessing. It is very surreal! I was on chinese herbs for 2 cycles and hcg for one cycle which I took on P+3,4,6,8 because I messed up the days. This time around I really feel like the morning sickness is harder...always queezy with a gross taste in my mouth. It is worth it though! My poor husband. The house has gone done hill because I am on the couch most of the day :( I would appreciate any prayers for a healthy pregnancy, thank you!!! I have an ultrasound in about 2 weeks and I am anxious to see how this little sweet pea is growing. I will have to post more later (because it is late now) about how we told my parents and some sweet stories from the kids about their excitement...just so I can treasure them for later :) ps. if you know me in real life we are keeping this news a secret for awhile :)

I still really hate the 2 week wait!!! I have been a crazy hormonal mess! Very certain I am not pregnant though...I already got a negative test and a fading positive test. I am on hcg again so I know it is just the hcg leaving my system. I wish I could just sleep until my period arrived because I have been such crazy lady, my poor family. I am on hcg to extend my luteul phase. last month it was three days and this cycle I am on P+11....i am in a major hurry to post this but i just wanted to write it down for my own sake really since it is pretty boring cycle stuff :)

Real quick...I really want to do some special Lenten things with my children this year for Lent. I got some idwas off of different blogs and came up with a few things that are working for us. Here are some pictures.