Christmas 2011
Dear Family and Friends,
Let me just get it out of the way and start by saying this has been the toughest year of my life. One would think that if one were to start a year with a funeral that it could only go uphill from there, but one would be wrong. I must admit that there have been moments in the year that have transcended the overshadowing gloom, that even (dare I say) have been joyful, but the tone of the year has been sad and lonely. Despite my knowledge that we can and will be together again, I miss Christy deeply and cannot get over the emptiness that pervades my soul on a daily basis. After 20 plus years of spending every possible moment with her that I could, this time of separation has been tough, although I know that considering the nature of her cancer I was blessed to have her here as long as I did. I must not forget though the rays of sunshine that she left behind for me as I struggle to carry on and carry forward in life. The Brightest rays being our children who inspire me to keep going, through their own strength and adaptability, and the love they show to me. Despite their own sorrows they have taken up the torch and have accepted God’s will and have remembered the love of their mother and the great things that she taught them. I am often asked “how are the kids doing?” and I must reply that they are doing great and ultimately much better than I am. We constantly speak about Mom and how she said this and that, and the things she did, and what she would have thought of that. She did her job and set them on the right course. She prayed that she would be around a bit longer so that she could finish her job in raising them, but so far it seems that her lessons and love were woven deep enough in their hearts to carry them forward. I feel it is my job now just not to mess them up. I appreciate all of you who help me both physically getting things done and with a kind word now and then to help cheer me up when I am down.
The year started off with a bang! The funeral was a roaring success. Got to see some friends that I hadn’t seen in a while and meet some new people. The talks and tributes were wonderful and the music spectacular. My musical highlight was the past and present Young Women from our area (most of whom Christy had taught or interacted with) standing in the chapel aisles and singing “the olive tree” ( one of Christy’s favorites). I am sure she enjoyed every moment of the service. We think there was 600 to 700 people there that day. By grand favor we were able to have the entire service broadcast down to Paraguay via internet so Ross could still participate with us and continue to serve his 2 year mission. Thanks to everyone who was able to attend and support us on that difficult day, week, month… year.
Speaking of January. Seems in High school you get the month off. Marissa had a few days off before and for the funeral then went back to school for a day or two then had exam week and semester break and poof the month was gone. What’s with that? I shouldn’t complain. I took the week of Christmas off which turned out to be a blessing. (got to spend a little extra time with my sweetheart in her last few days). Then I had the week off to plan a funeral. Then I squeezed a couple of more weeks out using sick days and flex days at work. Luckily the great staff that I work with were understanding and accommodating to me. It was the time I needed to begin to get my mind and affairs in order.
In February I had another week off around teachers convention and family day so we accepted an invitation from the Blomfields to head down to their cabin in Idaho and hang out and shop and do some skiing. First time for me at Schweitzer Basin ski hill. Nice little place. The girls enjoyed learning to ski a bit better and the weather was not too cold. This was right in the middle of basketball season for Emma and Marissa. They were sure keeping us (me and grandpa and grandma Olson) hopping getting them to and from practices and games. Not to mention all the other activities that were going on. Piano, violin, church activities, choirs etc. Life became much simpler though once the b-ball season came to a close in March. The new relaxed schedule meant that we were free to take off for a few days in April over the Easter weekend to head out to Invermere and sleep over and go to the hot springs and relax a bit. We like to reminisce on how we stayed “in an inn in Invermere”.
In a few instances this last year, ideas have come to mind that have swelled and taken flight that have lead to some major expenses but have provided something that was needed at a specific time. The first of these ideas was that I needed a new TV. I know it sounds frivolous but I also know that it was something that Christy always wanted but we were never able to afford. She would have loved it and I know she loves that we are being able to enjoy it. Something like that happened in May as well. I mentioned to a friend that I really loved his car and that if he ever thinks he is going to sell it to give me a call. It took a couple of minutes for him to believe I was serious but I assured him I was. I was thinking down the road a year or so because I knew he loved the car, but within a few weeks I had the keys in my hands and was driving it away from his house. This was significant in a few ways to me. The first and most obvious was that the day I picked up the car was my 22nd anniversary. I was in the weeks prior to that day feeling a dread that the day would soon come along with a flood of pain and misery. As it was, instead it felt like my wife had given me a special gift of something that she again knew I had wanted for many years. I also know that it was a car that she would have loved to drive and enjoyed herself. Secondly I have come to wonder since if that friend was not somewhat inspired to the fact that it was something that I needed now and not in the future, and gave up the car before he was done with it, for my sake.
Sometime in February another idea started forming in my brain with regards to how to deal with the summer schedule. I decided that for the summer it would be best to have someone come and live with us to allow the grandparents some time off and to help the girls get up and get some things done around the house and then have some summer fun while I was stuck at work. I called Mackenzie Chiles who is a friend of the family and she agreed to work for me for the summer as my right hand man so to speak. She lived with us and helped us to meet the demands of our schedules and have some fun. Along with this idea came an idealistic thought that the girls would be wanting to spend every moment together going to parks and swimming and activities and such. The reality was that they scattered off to friends houses and sort of moved independently and ran Mackenzie ragged getting them around. None the less I locked them in the car together for the last 2 weeks of summer and drove them down to California for some sun and fun. Vegas, Disney, Hollywood, Six Flags, Ventura beach, SanFrancisco, Redwoods, JellyBelly factory, and many other weird and wonderful things. We stayed with family and old friends and made some new friends. After dropping Kenzie off at BYU we headed home. It was a great end to the summer. Unfortunately we did have to sacrifice 2 important things to make it happen. One was my niece Diana’s wedding. All I can say was I had the trip planned first. Second was that Marissa had to miss the Taylor Swift Concert that she had a ticket for and was planning to attend with all her friends. I did hear the occasional heartbreaking whine but for the most part she was good about it and realized the importance of being together as a family.
We are now back into the school routine and getting along well for the most part. Grandma and Grandpa Olson still help us out a lot with the dog and the after school pickups and such. Marissa has been singing her heart out with three different school choirs and they had a wonderful performance this last week. Marissa is such a great driver, recently I have been finding myself dozing off as she drives us to and from piano lessons in Okotoks. Emma took home nearly all the academic awards and many athletic awards for grade seven last year and continues to be very focused and committed to school. As of this week she is sporting a new metal mouth, brace face, tinsel teeth. 18 months to a beautiful smile. Erica’s teacher says she is wonderful to have in class and she is very helpful and kind to the other kids. She is in piano lessons and enjoying swimming class with her friend Stephanie. She is still my baby and my little sweetheart. Ross is still committed to his efforts as a missionary in Paraguay but only has less than 8 months until his time to return. I on the other hand some days feel like I need to be committed (into an asylum) as I don’t quite know how I will make it through. I always do though and move on to try another day. I certainly don’t do it alone. Thanks for all your prayers and offerings. They sustain us and lift us up. We appreciate everything that has been done this last year on our behalf. I know Christy is as appreciative to all of you as I am. It takes a village to raise a child and I am blessed to be a part of a most wonderful village.
MERRY CHRISTMAS
The Humphreys family.
P.s Marissa is my favorite kid!!
P.s.s I’d love to keep all my gloves.
P.P.S.S anyone else ever had their facebook account hacked and odd postings show up? ;-)
