Just As I Am

Funny how when a certain change takes place, it feels as if your life has been turned upside down. Yet, the uneasiness somehow slowly dissipates and eventually a certain level of comfort sets in. I guess what they say about 'Time changes everything' is partly true. Time does change certain things. Time brings about the change. Time brings about change.

Anyway, this marks the end. Something new is coming, again. Not really new, but it seems all too far away. Seems like I've just hit the restart button. I guess I just like to have a certain stability in life. But I'm game for change. Game for what lies in the near distance. But what lays further ahead is still a mystery waiting to be uncovered... and I've yet to play a part in this life-changing decision.

Back.

The coming week marks the end of one of the highlights of polytechnic education - SIP. It's been good, overall. Guess God placed different people there to help me grow in one way or another. For the record and only by grace, I don't find myself annoyed by you anymore. After 11 long weeks did I realise that you're not that bad afterall. Just a little patience, understanding, and perhaps a matter of getting used to. I hope this stays for as long as possible.

Anticipating the busyness (and maybe stress!) that's coming this week onward - Report, back to school, electives, new classmates, FYP!... and the cycle starts again with the exception of project. Hope to enjoy and treasure the last semester in TP!

Alright...it's gonna be a lonely (i almost typed looney) monday! The other 2 got time off.
It's coming. I feel a lil pressure somewhat, somehow.

---

You girls remind me of myself in the past. I hope to fulfill my goal here before I leave, if I do. I remember I once thought of how I wanted to be like you in future. To bring warmth and friendship to new people. I guess in the process, somehow it was faded and forgotten.

The more I see, the more I wonder how you people did such a wonderful job of caring for and loving the quiet, toot, young lil me. So many questions. Was I like that, was I not.

So now.
You who brought us together in the beginning,
Let them be open to You, to us, to me.
Use me to befriend, guide and influence
In ways that only You
Can make possible.


*'You' refers to different subjects. May be of a higher being, a group of people or an individual.

It was a rather stressful period. Not to great extent but enough for me to know that I am indeed feeling some form of stress. With different stuff all mixed together. But it's passing and it'll be over soon. ALL over by next year as well.

I haven't mentioned much about intership I realised. Well I can only say there're Ups and Downs... Thank God for grace. I need more love more patience though. There can never be enough love nor patience. Always something one can improve on.
I just hope I don't screw up, anyhow. Tournament, leave early. Once late. And all the other stuffs.
But good thing is it's ending. It's ENDING! Time flies. But I'd still see you. and you. Thankfully there's always others around when I'm with you. I don't know why you irk me but you do, most of the time. I'm sorry I'm not a good kid of Yours but I'm trying. In a state of work-in-process. Character developement in progress.

Was disappointed when I heard the news on Sat. Before the so called announcement I already had an inkling of what was to come. But when it was said, I felt it. When it was seen, I felt it too. Damn the disappointment. The blurred reason. Because of lack of skill or for the good of the team. This coming tue, I can either embrace it or hate it. It's up to me.

Goodbye world, see you next weekend.