Bits and pieces of what I am

Sometimes I just want to shout out loud, punch this screen, just tear everything up.
Are we heard?
Is there a use to reason?
who will hear?
Reason or merely an excuse?
Who will trust us?

If you do something wrong, and you do not reason it out, what then?
Just say nothing?
There's gotta be more than just an apology.
But reasons seem more like excuses over time.
And eventually, no reason is heard.

To remain in the silence? or to speak out and reason when all you reasoned out is seen as only an excuse? Either way don't they end up with bad outcomes?
No one is perfect, what then?

SERIOUSLY. I JUST. PWEHIFNAIJWIEFJOWEIFJ CMSIEFJSPDJXCFKLSDF
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After so many years, here I am once again blogging in the wee hours of the morning.
It's been a while and I noticed my blog is starting to die, it's probably too slow paced and cumbersome for people to read rather than the fast paced updated facebook.

oh well. Anyways exams are halfway done. I did what I've been doing since I was young, making sure my maths would be top notch. This year was really scary. Imagine not being able to do what you enjoy doing so much. The feeling that you can't do anything at all.

I even went through old posts and blogs I used to read. And I just realized how bad I am, as a friend to everyone.
Sometimes we try so hard to help someone, give advice and hope, it ends up hurting them more and we end up getting them into a more painful situation than the one before.
Imagine. And how many things have happened because of what I've done?
I can remember very clearly ever since I was 15, it all began.
Ruining things that come into my hands, letting opportunities slip past, making everyone leave in the end, burden everyone, make myself look pathetic.
This.. other side.
I can smile as easily as possible, even for no reason.
But we never know sometimes, it is possible otherwise.
Yes, being upset so easily, sometimes for no reason at all.
You're probably thinking "WHAT? what kind of guy is this." or "emo guy, dunno what's his prob."
I have a very big problem, true. I have a low EQ. explains alot?
Just anything at all can bring me down easily especially things that matter to me the most.

Anyway forget what I just said, it's just crap. as my blog url says so.
I've been through so much this one and a half year in college. Honestly I haven't been this strong, nor this weak before.

Still wondering what to do with my blog.

Time to get a wink of sleep. Goodnight.


Building and demolishing,
lift up, pull down,
heal, hurt,
no one can be two at once,
or else those that come will leave.. eventually.

Cause I just can't look its killing me
And taking control.
Sometimes it's inevitable, that I'll end up being Mr. Brightside.

In ruins.