How to make an American-Canadian-Ethiopian Family

Last weekend, we had the Zimmers visit. Ally came, too, yay!! We went to Smolak Farms with the intention of picking pumpkins. It turned out we were a little too late for that, but the kids didn't seem to mind. Jacob licked about 2/3 of the pumpkins there. He kept referring to them as "apples". It was so fun to see the Zimmers, and a real treat to have Ally here!








This weekend, JF and I thought it would be fun to carve the pumpkin with Jacob. We thought it would be such a cute photo op and that Jacob would love the slimy pumpkin guts. Boy were we wrong! He would not go anywhere near the pumpkin once we had taken the top off. In fact, he would point to the pumpkin and say, "danger" and then run away. As a result, there are no pictures. We do however, have a picture of our pumpkin, along with the one that Jacob made at daycare on Friday.



Can you tell which is which?

In other news, I have my first 1/2 marathon in 2 weeks. I am freaking out. I have actually been down for the count with a sinus infection and an ear infection, so I have not been running at all for the past 10 days. I ran this morning and had a nice run, but I was slow. I am hoping to get one more long run in before the race. EEK! I feel scared about the distance. I have never run that far. I am hoping to book a hot tub soak in the evening after the race so that I am not too sore the next day. I don't know how anyone does a marathon...

I have been fairly sure for a while now that Jacob has a sense of humor. I could see little flashes of it here and there. But last night, he actually played a little joke on me. It was just after bath time and he was all dressed in jammies and lotioned up. I put him in baby-gated area just off the kitchen so I could get his bottle for him and he could play. So I am grabbing his bottle and walk towards the microwave, when Jacob pops up from behind the baby gate and roars at me. Then he laughs and laughs, so pleased with himself, and sinks back down. I burst out laughing myself. It was so cute and funny! I love seeing his little personality develop!

This morning, on Fox 25 news, the commentator VB was talking about the very sad story of the woman who was murdered in her house in NH. It turns out that one of the boys involved was adopted. Although it was not mentioned in the piece by VB, he also struggled with bipolar disorder. VB talked about the parents of all four teens. He wonders what level of responsibility they had/have in this gruesome crime. But then he focused on Spader, the boy who is adopted. He said we know they are not responsible- they are clearly good people because they adopted. He talked about the fact that this is EVERY ADOPTED PARENT'S WORST FEAR. He talks about the fact that something must have happened to the child before the child was placed that has caused this to happen.

OMG, WHAT!?!?!?!?! This is my worst fear?? I didn't know that, but thankfully VB was able to point it out to me. I didn't even know that I was goodness personified because I am privileged enough to be able to adopt. I didn't even realize the biological kids can't have mental illness, and that all adopted children are broken. That privately, all of the adoptive parents I have met are wondering, when is this child going to grow up and kill someone? AURGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Seriously?? Never in my life have I thought to myself, "I wish I could punch that newscaster". I am sitting here thinking it now.

Luckily, I have impulse control. I sent an email instead. Not sure what will happen, but here it is...

VB made comments this morning about the very disturbing NH murder. One of the alleged perpetrators is an adopted child. VB went on to say that this is every adoptive parent’s worst nightmare. I am an adoptive mother. I found this comment to be exceptionally inappropriate. I never want my son to hear that this is a fear of every adoptive parent. I am not any more afraid of this than any other parent that I know. This may be a fear of all parents- that for as much as we try to raise our children to be kind and thoughtful individuals, that somewhere along the way, something goes wrong. It is scary to think that maybe mental illness will touch our children and cause them to behave in a way that is heartbreaking and wrong. But to name that as a fear specific to adoptive parents is ignorant and perpetuates the idea that adopted children are different than biological children. Adopted children are not broken, and not all have suffered traumas before they came to live with their adoptive families. I cannot tell you how disappointed, saddened and angry I feel over these thoughtless, ignorant comments.

I did not get a written response, but my email was read in its entirety on Fox News this morning. I did not see it, but Tara did! There was an e-mail from an adoptee who was unhappy by the comments, a woman with no connection to adoption community who took exception to him, and then ME :o) VB was asked by another broadcaster if these letters made him change his mind. His response was, "No, I still think they regret the day they adopted him". So there you have it. I still feel like I fought the good fight! There is only so much one can do about an ignoramus.

We have been busy recently, but I guess that is par for the course. We have never been so popular or requested as we have been since Jacob has come home! Two weeks ago, we were in East Northport running the Cow Harbor 10k and hanging out with the Zimmers. It was such a treat! They were, as usual, the most gracious of hosts! We love being in their home. It is such a warm, loving environment. Jacob loves being there because the lovely Addia resides there. All that little man wants to do is kiss her! He is only human!


The race itself was great too. I took 3 minutes off of my time which made me so happy! All of those early morning runs have paid off! Undoubtedly, the best part of the run was seeing Jacob and Addia in the cow costumes at the finish line. It made my day. I am already looking forward to next year's race.


Last weekend we had JF's mom and dad visit. They had not seen Jacob in 4 weeks and were amazed at the difference. Folks, he is no longer a baby. He is a little boy. SIGH... But I have to say, it is a treat to hear him call them Oma and Papa. It was a short visit, but there was enough time for hugs and kisses to be shared by all.

Next weekend, we see my folks. There will be more hugs and kisses to share! The last time I saw my parents was at the reunion, so I am looking forward to seeing them. It will be nice to get to spend a little more one on one time with them.

On the 12th, I have another 10k. It is my last race before my first ever Half-Marathon. I am so excited to have one under my belt! I have been saying for almost 2 years that I am going to do it.

As far as Jacob's milestones go, he is RUNNING! (I think he will be able to join me shortly on some of my races.) He is climbing! He uses a spoon and a fork with varying degrees of sucess. It is a MESS, but he def wants to do it himself. He has added even more words. Just recently, "apple", "blocks", "sneaker", and "yellow" have become part of the vocab. We enjoy every moment with him. Watching him grow brings to our hearts like nothing else could.