The Life of the Wagner's

I need to add this to the top of this post.. It is HARD to sit down and blog. This has taken me 4 hours and 2 different sittings on two different days, different weeks at that. I was sick the first time and this time I have had the super bowl in my face, nerf bullets flying past and one to the head from point blank range. Thanks HG. On top of that precious kiddos are needing me and trying to "help" me type. This font has to be like size 4 and this site is outdated, but I don't really care to take the time to figure out how to update it. The pics on the side show our 4 year anniversary and our precious Belle girl. We will be married 12 years in May and sweet Belle went to doggy heaven in Oct 2015. :( There's the only update this site will get. Oh and my ADD is severe. Ok, read on. Almost four years have passed since I last posted. Easton is five and a half now, sweet as ever, and in kindergarten. He also currently legit thinks he's a secret agent. Holland Grace is 3 and a half, sassy as ever, and started pre-k in the fall. She legit thinks she's Easton's boss. Blog posts are something I do in my head over so often, but never ever take the time to do UNLESS I have big news. I have big news. First though I need to put this out there- I have recently taken Nyquil because I feel like poo and I can barely see what I'm typing because this font is so stinking small. My glasses are in my purse which is in my truck and its too cold and I am not going to get them. Therefore, the usual full of typo, half sensed, blogs I put out there might look like Pulitzer prizes compared to this. Not to mention this dinosaur of a computer that needs to be laid to rest keeps losing wifi connection so the website keeps losing connection so this may never even come to fruition. Maybe I should say the big news first and then go back to tell the story from there.. We're adopting baby Wagner 3. I remember back in October 2015 thinking how Holland Grace was well into her 2's now and if it were up to Jarrod and I to create babies,(if you haven't read my blog before I am pretty straight forward) it might be the time I would start that discussion with him. Instead, I sent an email to our adoption lawyer telling him to keep us in mind, we are open to another baby. Any baby. We added to our request to our personal prayer lists. "If its your will Lord, we would love to love another child. Since then, as time has passed, id say the desire has gotten stronger to nurture another baby, however I know maybe more than most that just because I desire it certainly doesn't mean its going to happen. We have been so abundantly blessed with our two little loves. It took realizing that God doesn't promise us anything here on earth and that my desire to be a mother might not be fulfilled for my heart to open to adoption. That's pretty embarrassing to admit, but its true. Good thing i'm a little drugged. I wanted to birth a baby like "everyone else" got to. Nothing is wrong with me so its extra not fair I cannot especially since science says I can! The moment my selfishness hit me and I realized how wrong I was that MY plan would work, the idea of adoption grew into my heart. I am not really sure my what my point of that is so instead of erasing and critiquing my words so far (I seriously can barely see them anyway) I am going to move on along. I'll give you a little time line of the way this has happened. Fall 2016 (maybe Thanksgiving tims.. ish..) Easton's birthmother told me she had met a girl who was in a very similar situation to her own. To not be specific young and pregnant unplanned. The girl, Ashley, wasn't sure what she was going to do and E's birthmother remembered we were with an adoption agency in Georgia before we met her. She asked for the name of it because she was helping Ashley, who is from Georgia, giving her advice and suggesting resources. I told her the name, told her what cities in Georgia they cover, and a little FYI that we are open to another baby... She thanked me and said that Ashley had not told her parents or her boyfriends parents yet about the pregnancy. I told her we'd pray for Ashley. I told Jarrod about our new prayer request. At Christmas E's birtmother told us she had not heard from her friend over the holidays. The day after Christmas we visited with our good friends Hunter and Bethany Brendle and their 3 precious children. Precious baby Brendle #3 was only a few weeks old. I held baby Archer a long time while we were there. Oh the baby fever.. but who doesn't hold a new baby and not want one even if its ever so slight of a feeling. I took a snap chat of baby archer as a held her. I must have mentioned wanting another baby, or maybe it was how I was longingly staring at the baby that prompted Bethany to ask if we had plans for another. Jarrod answered fast and beautifully. He said "When you adopt, God tells you how many children you will have an when." So true. Great reminder that my God is in control and He knows the desires of my heart. Moving on with the story (because I'm ready for another shot of Nyquil and the bed), 3 days later I was at work and get a text around 10:30am that said "SO I just heard back from Ashley and she wants to meet y'all. She thinks y'all would be a good fit to adopt her baby! my answer "OH.MY.GOSH." She sent me Ashley's number to call and so I called her. **********I didn't make it any longer that night. Now its a week and a day later. No more Nyquil excuse. Moving on*********** I called her. She told me she definitely wanted to put her baby up for adoption. She said she had heard a lot about us and thinks her baby would be a perfect fit for our family. All the emotions, feelings, things running through my head... I told her that we would love to adopt her baby, but I wanted to make sure she knew she had options. We know lots of people who are wanting to adopt their first child and she doesn't have to pick us just because we fell into her path. She said she understand that and she liked the fact her baby will be our third. Good enough for me. She told me the baby is a girl, due May 4th. She wanted to meet us. The day was a Thursday and that weekend was New Years eve/day. We were leaving for the Passion conference on Monday. I knew she lived in Georgia, but had no idea where. I assumed it was in Southeast Georgia. I asked her where she lives- outside of Atlanta. Immediately my little brain started clicking.. We had a female spot open for Passion we had not been able to fill for a month. I told her we would be in Atlanta for the Passion Conference and had a spot open. She had not heard of the conference I explained it is a Christian conference for college aged students with awesome speakers and music. She said she would like to go. That Monday she met us in the hotel lobby in Atlanta. There were probably 100 people in there, but I knew who she was the second I saw her face. I enjoyed getting to spend time with her for 3 days. We have a lot in common, just as I do with Easton and Holland Graces precious birthmothers. We picked out a name for the baby on the last day- Addilyn. Baby Addie. Middle name to be determined. Our prayer since the minute we found out about this has been for God clearly shut the door to this opportunity if its not His will. No doors have been shut.Please be in prayer for the situation. For Ashley and baby Addie. For Ashley and her ex-boyfriend Andrew.. their situation is not a good one right now. For the logistics of it.. she is due at the end of baseball season and the school year. We will have to stay in Georgia after she's born. I don't know how I am going to handle work because I work off commission. Lots of unknowns that we know God will take care of in time.