makingdaddysilly

A 5-year-old boy was ready to get outside for an adventure …

“Today, I want to be a …. a cowboy!”

So he threw on his cowboy hat, grabbed his trusty stick horse in one hand and his rubber-band gun in the other, and  hopped out into the summer’s day. 

Wanting to do what cowboys do, the boy thought and thought of what adventure he could have first.

“I want to drive a herd across the range.”    So he looked all around for a “herd”  to drive.  To his left, he saw some flowers, to his right he saw grass and schrubs.

“Hmmm …. none of those will do, what could I possibly herd along?”

Then he saw the perfect thing, an ant hill near the edge of an empty lot.   Using the end of his stick horse (whose name was Popsicle) he helped the ants come out of their hole and out onto the plains of the weedy ground.

“Move along little anties”, said the boy. And they sure did, spreading out in random directions to stear clear of the prodding stick.

Satisfied, the little cowbow began thinking about the possibilities for his next adventure.

“I know, Popsicle, let’s have a good old-fashioned western gunfight!” exclaimed the boy.  Absolutely delighted with the idea, he began to look around once more for a worthy opponent.  By the road, there was a street lamp.  By the garage, there was the garbage can.

“Hmmm …. none of those will do, who could I possibly challenge to a gunfight?”

Then he saw his slow-moving basset hound dog, Frank, slurping away at his water dish near the front porch.

“Alright, Frank, I am challenging you to a duell,” said the boy.  Frank just stared lamely back at the boy.

“We’re going to draw on the count of three … 1 … 2 … 3!”

The energetic gunslinger released the trigger of his wooden gun, and a rubber band sailed towards the hound dog and plopped down to the ground several feet in front of Frank.  Frank just stared for a moment then turned to settle down into a shady spot for another nap.

“Well, I’d say that this was a good hard day’s worth of work.  Tomorrow, I want to be a … circus clown!”

 The End

A little girl went out for a walk in the country … much longer than she really intended.

She ended up crossing a river, going through the nearby woods, up a mountain, down the backside of that mountain and eventually stumbled upon a big, dark cave.

Curious, the little girl quietly stepped inside to explore.  It was very dark indeed, but towards the back of the cave, she saw two large, white circles … almost as if they were floating in the air close together.

She went closer, reached up with her finger to touch one and …

“Oooouuucchh!”

A big bear lumbered to his feet, “What did you do that for?”

It all frightened the little girl, and she started to run away.

“Wait … wait … why are you running away,” asked the bear.

“I thought you were going to eat me,” came her reply.

“No, no, no … I’m a nice bear, I’m Mr. Googley Eyes”

“Oh, okay … well then, would you care to meet my family?”

“Umm … okay,” said the bear.

So they walked and walked … up the mountain, down the mountain, through the woods, and over the river. 

As they came close the little girl’s home, her mother was in the kitchen doing the dishes when she looked out the window and saw her daughter being followed by big bear.

Frantic, she burst out the front door, ran right up to the bear and …POKED him in the eye.

“Ooouuuuuucchh!  What’d you do that for?”

“Well, I thought you were going to eat my little girl.”

“No, no, no … I’m a nice bear, I’m Mr. Googley Eyes.”

“Oh, okay … well then, would you like to join us for dinner?”

“Umm … okay,” said the bear.

So there they sat, enjoying a nice dinner, when the little girl’s daddy arrived home from work. 

The moment he walked through the door, he saw his lovely wife, his darling little girl, and then … a bear?!

He was startled into action … he leapt foward and POKED the bear in the eye.

“Oooouuuuucchh!  What’d you do that for?”

“Well, I thought you were going to eat my family.”

“No, no, no … I’m a nice bear, I’m Mr. Googley Eyes.”

“Oh, okay … well then, would you care to join us for dessert?”

“Thank you, but no thank you, sir.   I am s long way from home, my eyes hurt like crazy and, frankly, I just want to go back to my cave where it is nice and safe … and dark.”

So he did.  He crossed over the river, through the woods, up the mountain, down the mountain, and back to his cave.  And took a nap.

The End

A little boy and his sister were playing down by the river, taking turns throwing rocks into the water.

All of a sudden, they saw a movement in the tall grass beside them. 

“What was that?” they said together.

The little boy grabbed a small pebble and tossed it into the grass … just then, a big, green frog hopped out in front of them.

“Eeek!” cried the sister. “Keep it away … it’s yucky.”

“Hey, I may be green and little slimy, but there’s no need to call me ‘yucky’,” said the frog.

Both children jumped back and the little girl gasped, “It’s a talking frog!”

“Mom and Dad will never believe us,” cried her brother. “Let’s catch him!”

He quickly took off his baseball hat and plopped it down over the frog. 

“Got him!”

But before he could reach for his hat, it started hopping down the dirt path.

They chased the hopping hat all the way back to their house, where their mom and dad were outside washing the car.

“Mom … Dad … stop that hopping hat!”

They did so, but pulled up short when they saw what was inside.

Panting from running so far, the little boy finally said, “You’ve got to listen to it, it is a talking frog.”

Stunned, their mom and dad stared curiously at the little green creature.

The frog stared right back at them and then finally let out a  big RRR-ibbit … RRR-ibbit.

 Shocked, the kids tried to explain, “But, but … he was talking just a minute ago.”

Their mom replied, “Come on kids, your father and I are pretty much done with the car … let’s go in and get some lunch.”

Just then, the little girl had an idea.  “Oh good,” she said. “I can’t wait to eat some nice juicy flies.”

The frog immediately perked up.  “Flies … I love flies.  Oh can I please, please have some too?  They are my very favorite.”

“Ah ha, you see,” the girl exclaimed.  “It is a talking frog! Can we keep him?”

Stilled stunned, their dad said, “Um, I’m not sure … the neighbors will think we’re crazy. I’m having a hard time believing it myself.”  

“Oh please say yes,” cried the children. “We’ll be super friendly to it and we promise to feed it extra flies every day.”

“Well frog,” the dad said.  “Since you can talk, what do you think?  If we agree to take care of you, can you keep the whole talking thing a secret from the neighbors? What do you say?”

“ZZZ-ippit” the frog croaked.

The End