Holy Cow! Yes, we are still alive! SO SO MUCH has happened since I last blogged! Elder Thomas and Elder Bean are both doing great in the mission field, we built and moved into our new home, I was very blessed with a healthy pregnancy (other than the 50 pounds I gained from retaining TONS of water), I survived child birth, and I am now a full time stay at home mom to a beautiful little girl while Matt works hard for our little family! 2012 was a great year for us! We had lots of changes, but they were all so good!
I typed up Brittlyn's birth story a few days after she was born just so I had it in my journal. I have pasted it on this post but it is VERRRYYYY long so I don't blame you if you would like to skip over it!
I went in to the doctor on Monday 09/10 and Dr. Bean
stripped my membranes for the second time.
He said he was able to get me to a full 1” and wanted to see if that
would help get the process going. I
waited a few days and nothing happened.
On Thursday 09/13, I went in to work feeling huge and
pregnant like normal. About midmorning
and throughout the rest of the work day I was having strong contracts about
every 10-15 minutes. I texted Matt to
let him know, but told him it could still be some time because they were not
painful at all. I had pretty much
convinced myself that I would carry past my due date and would have to be
induced. I was counting these contractions
as false labor and didn’t think much of it.
I went home that night after work and the contractions stopped. I cooked dinner and then went to bed.
Matt got home from work around 2:00 am and that is about the
time my contractions started again. They
were strong but not super painful. They
were, however, painful enough that I couldn’t lay there and sleep anymore so I
decided to get up and walk around for a little bit. As the night progressed they continued to get
stronger and more painful. I still was
convinced this was false labor and didn’t want to go in to the hospital for
fear of them sending me home! I woke
Matt up (from the little sleep he got) at about 5:30am and told him I was in a
lot of pain but I didn’t know what to do because I was not in “real” labor. He decided we should time them, so from about
5:30 am to about 8:00am we timed each one.
They got more consistent, between 4-5 minutes, and way more
painful. I would pace around the house
and when one came on I would grab on to the wall and get myself through
it. Finally at about 8:00am, I made the
decision to go to the hospital just to see what was going on. In the back of my mind I was still convinced
they would just check my dialation and send me home and tell me to stay tough
and come back if things got worse.
Matt and I both showered and headed up to American Fork
Hospital. (I still can’t believe I got
through that shower. It was so
painful!) I was still having
contractions and now they were about 3-4 minutes apart. I could get through them easier if I was
standing up, so needless to say, the car ride to the hospital was not pleasant
as I would have to get through them sitting down.
We got to the hospital and they wanted to check me. They had me put on a gown and lay on a bed
and they placed monitors on my tummy.
They watched Brittlyn’s heartbeat, my blood pressure, and they also
checked my dialation. I was measuring at
a 3 and they said everything looked great with Brittlyn. My blood pressure, however, was 169 which was way to high due to me being in
so much pain. They admitted me right
away instead of making me be “on watch” for an hour to see if I
progressed.
I couldn’t believe I was getting admitted. I was going to have a baby. I wasn’t ready. I was so nervous. It was so unreal! I couldn’t believe I would not be leaving the
hospital without our little girl in my arms.
I was so scared. Scared for the
epidural, scared to push a baby out, scared to have this little miracle that
was going to rely on me for everything.
The whole 9 months of pregnancy just caught up to me and I was so nervous
and excited all at the same time.
They moved me to a room and had me stay in the robe and get
on a more comfortable bed. I was still
having more and more painful contractions and just trying to breathe through
them every 2-3 minutes all while trying to answer questions from the
nurses. They ordered my epidural and
came in to give me my IV. The nurse
tried giving it in my left hand first (which KILLED) and couldn’t find a good
vein, then my right hand (hurt WORSE), couldn’t find a good vein, so she put in
in my right arm. The worst part was
having the nurses fish around in my hands while having contractions! The nurse also took blood to send down to the
lab to test it just to make sure everything looked good.
I waited about an hour for my epidural and when the anesthegologist
came in to give me the epidural, I freaked out!
I was so scared it was going to kill!
I worried for nothing! The worst
part was the numbing shot, but it more just made me jump from the poke. Within about 15 minutes of receiving the
epidural, I felt AMAZING! I felt I could
finally settle down and maybe get a little sleep because I had been up the
whole night before.
After my epidural, we called family and our bosses at work
to let them know we had been admitted and we were going to have a baby!
After about an hour of having my epidural, Dr. Aagard (the
on-call doctor) came in and broke my water.
After he broke my water I went from a 4 to a 5 very quickly. I figured I still had quite a bit of time
though, so Matt and I relaxed and I watched the monitor as I would have
contractions every 2-3 minutes. It was
quiet in the room for about an hour and I remember just feeling so
peaceful. I was so excited and nervous
and couldn’t quite wrap my head around what was happening.
The nurse came in at about 3:00 pm and checked me to see
what I was measuring. I measured at a 6,
so again I figured I would be in labor all night and end up pushing much later
that night. I was checked again at 4:00
and was at an 8 and they told me I would probably start pushing in about an
hour. Cara and Robbie were in the room a
few hours before I started pushing and I remember a few times where I would
just start shaking uncontrollably. I was
so nervous and couldn’t relax.
The nurse came back in a little before 5:00 and started
getting everything ready for me to start pushing. I had
Matt give me a blessing that everything would go well and it helped calm my
nerves a ton. My doctor, Dr. Bean, ended up being the doctor to come in to the
hospital. I was so relieved to know he
would be the one there. The nurse
showed Matt where she wanted him to stand and help while I pushed and she got
on the other side of me and told me to push while she counted. A contraction would come and she would begin
counting while I would push. I began
crowning and after I would get done pushing I would have to cough because of
the nasty cold that I had. When I would
cough, Matt and the nurse could see the baby’s head poke out more. The nurse told me not to cough or push until
Dr. Bean got in the room.
Dr. Bean came into the room at about 5:15. The nurse would wait for a contraction and
then tell me to push. I never pushed so
hard in my life, but I also remember hoping I was using the right muscles to
push. I couldn’t feel hardly anything
but a little pressure. She had me push 2
sets and then I remember Matt saying that he could see her head and she had a
lot of hair. Dr. Bean told me I was
starting to tear a little bit and asked if it was ok if he did an
episiotomy. I told him it was ok and he
said it would be a very small cut. I
then pushed for 2 more sets and then she was out.
Dr. Bean laid her on my tummy and had Matt cut the short
umbilical cord. I touched her head while
she laid there and cried for a minute. I
was overwhelmed with so many emotions that I can’t even find the words to
describe the things I was feeling. She was just so perfect and did have so much
hair! They took her to clean her up and
Matt went over with her while they weighed her and measured her. She weighed in at 7lbs 1oz and was 18.5in
long.
I had so many thoughts going through my head while the
doctor finished with me. I couldn’t
believe how much easier that was than I thought it was going to be. I couldn’t believe my daughter was here
already. I couldn’t believe how much
love I was feeling at that time. I was
so grateful she was here and she was healthy and whole.
They wrapped her in a blanket and brought her over to me and
I held her for the first time. Another
wave of emotions came over me and I couldn’t believe how much I loved this
little girl who was just minutes old. I
also remember looking at Matt and feeling a stronger connection to him than I
have ever felt before. This was so
amazing. This moment was one I will
never forget.
Physically I felt really good and no pain (the epidural
hadn’t worn off yet), emotionally I felt complete and whole, spiritually I felt
my Heavenly Father so close to us. I was
so proud of my little family. I was so
proud of Matt and how good he was at supporting me through that process, and I
was so proud to be Brittlyn’s mom. I
knew she had so much potential and she was so special!
After a few hours in the delivery room, Matt and Brittlyn
went to the nursery where she was given her first bath and I was taken down to
Mother Baby. We spent the next two
nights at the hospital and had very little sleep. We were discharged from the hospital on
Sunday afternoon (9/16) and headed home.
We stopped by Grandma and Grandpa Bean’s house so they could see
her. When we got home, Max was super
overwhelmed and excited to see us and Mindy had dinner in the crock pot ready
for us, which was more perfect than we could have even hoped for. We were exhausted and just so happy to be
home!
Each day I have her here with me I have become more proud of
her. My love deepens for her and
Matt. My priorities in my own life have
shifted so much. My life now is
dedicated to being the best mom and wife that I can. I never want Brittlyn to second guess my love
and support for her. I want Matt to
always know I love him so much and am so grateful for the hard work he does for
our little family. Life is so different
than it was, even the day before she was born.
But, it is a good different. It
is hard to have a newborn, but I know it is worth it. I am so so grateful for such a healthy
pregnancy and baby girl.
Life with a 4 month old is the hardest and best thing I have ever experienced! Everyday is different. It definitely keeps me on my toes! I am so overwhelmed with how amazing she is. I see all her potential and it scares me to death to be responsible for this little person, but I am SO grateful for the challenge! I honestly don't remember what life was like before her. We love her so much and are so amazed with how fast she is growing and developing. Yes, she may be in the 95% for her weight, but we still love our little Tubby girl! She sleeps about 12+ hours a night. I normally have to go wake her up in the mornings because I need to nurse her before I explode. (sorry TMI) She is happy and very good natured!
We hope everyone else had a wonderful 2012 and hope that in 2013 we can all keep our resolutions (haha) and have better year than the last! :)
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