The McMillin's

Wow...It's been a while since I have posted!
Yesterday, February 5th, we had beautiful weather! Swimsuit weather...not quite yet, but the girls thought so. I think I have 3 little fish that are ready for summer! They asked if I would squirt them with the water hose while they were on the trampoline, but instead they just dumped water on themselves. **Too cold for me!** They jumped, rode scooters, played with chalk and just ran around.

Cowboy had fun outside too! Poor guy...he's getting so old!

Then I looked out the back door once the kids came in and saw this beautiful sky to finish out the day.  Thankful for God's beauty that He creates!

I have started and deleted this specific blog post a couple of times. I can't seem to put everything in to the right words.

I have grown up with law enforcement in my family, my grandpa, my dad and lots of friends of the family. Brandon and I actually have several friends our age that are in law enforcement/police work/investigation. I was brought up to respect your elders...no matter what their occupation is. (Police officers, teachers, stay at home moms, the garbage man.) It didn't matter if they lived in a mansion up the street or a cardboard box around the corner. Everyone is to be treated equal.

What has this world come to?? Why can't we all get along?? Shooting innocent cops (who are around to protect and serve) just because one individual officer made a bad name for cops?! The only words that come to mind are SICK and STUPID!! If you don't care about yourself, that's your prerogative, but don't kill or injure others in the midst of your stupidity! With everything that has happened recently in our area, tons of peoples lives have been changed forever. Some have lost dads, fathers, brothers, sons and husbands.  I can't imagine the heartache and pain that those families are going through. And how are we, as parents, suppose to explain to our children the biggest question that they have "WHY?"

I am beyond thankful that this kind of crazy stuff wasn't out there when my dad was doing his job of protecting and serving the community on the streets! It takes a calling to be in law enforcement, that's for sure. I don't know how some of my friends spouses let them go to work each day since the tragic event.

I want to thank each and every one of you who are in any type of law enforcement work. I know it is not an easy job, but I am thankful that you have chosen to take on the world! I will continue to pray for everyone during this difficult time. Let's all commit to have a little less hate and a little more God in the world!

Forever backing the Blue!

As most you know, I held an online auction in hopes to raise money for the Johnston Family and help take some of the burden off of them so that they could focus on the important things - being together as a family. I didn't really have a "goal" as to how much I wanted to earn, but I was hoping to get at least $2,000. With the help and generosity of everyone involved...I am so excited to be able to say that I raised over $7,500!! How amazing is that?! And I couldn't have done it without everyone. I am beyond thankful for each of your bids. I have to say, watching all the bids had me on the edge of my seat! It was so fun to watch and see people outbidding the last person, etc. Brandon and I were even fighting over who got the laptop to watch. :)

Update on Graham:
He went back in to the hospital the end of last week, but seems to be doing better each day. They are trying some new medications in hopes to get his weight back up. Please, keep the prayers coming! They are needed daily. Not only for Graham, but for his wife, Erin, and their young daughter, Jordan. Also pray for the doctors and nurses that are caring for him.

Thank you again to everyone who donated items and/or placed bids!

The podcast from the service that I did last weekend has been posted. Please feel free to listen and share!

If you are looking for a church home, please come for a visit! We would love to have you! 

Our church is doing a series right now called Kaleidoscope. Kaleidoscope is a ministry by the broken to the broken who desire to be used by God to create something beautiful. The church desires to help people move from post-crisis or recurring troublesome events to fully functioning followers of Christ, who actively participate in the ministry of His church. (I took this off of the church website.) Basically, it is where people open up and talk about troubles in their past. Anything from addiction, affairs, verbal abuse, sexual abuse, anxiety, depression, raising children with special needs and the list goes on. (Every story is volunteered. You are not called out on things.) We did something like this last year and the series was called "Fixer Upper". I loved it! Each week was so different than the next. It really makes you think, stop and think before you say something ugly or give an ugly face to someone, you don't know what they are going through!

As most of you know, I suffer from anxiety. And have for most of my life! Something just told me that I needed to volunteer for the Kaleidoscope series and share my struggles. If you know me, you know I don't really like talking about anxiety and all the issues I have had and continue to have! I feel that it's embarrassing, dumb and nobody understands it so I try and avoid it at all cost. I went ahead and bit the bullet and committed to being a part of the series. I didn't tell ANYONE I was doing this - not mom, dad, Brandon or even my BFF Liz. I did have to tell mom about a week ago because she was suppose to work in the nursery. I wanted to make sure she was able to be in service, so I had to tell her so that she could get someone to cover for her. It has been in the making for a while now (December) and I just had my turn at church this past Sunday. Let me tell you...it feels like a huge weight has been lifted off of my shoulders!

I had to be a church early that day to get the microphone on me and show me where/when to go on stage, etc. I just told Brandon that I had to be there early to help - I didn't elaborate. Anyways, I got there, got everything situated and then waited for church to begin. I sat with my group, like I usually do during worship. I knew that after all the songs, they would start to play the videos. (It was myself talking about anxiety and another person talking about depression.) Her video came on first, and I continued to sit and watch it. When hers was over, I knew mine was next, so I leaned over to Brandon, gave him kiss and said "I love you!" and got up and walked off to go backstage as my video started. I wish I could have seen the look and emotion on his face!! I know mom was crying...she was started crying when she first got there...love her! The other lady and myself then went up on stage and Jay, our pastor, asked us questions and kind of "interviewed" us regarding our situations. That isn't on video, but it will be on podcast if anyone wants to listen to it. I will post it as soon as it is out there and ready.

Here is my video...

What a weekend we had with LuLu!! (No, that's not her name, but that's what we call her. "LuLu", Landry Lu, etc. ) ***totally off topic, but too cute not to share***I had gone to a get together at church the other night and Brandon sent me a text about a conversation that the twins were having. (When you read this, think of how little kids talk and sound.)

Landry: whats my name?
Brynlee: You landgee nay  (Translation - Landry Renee)
Landry: No, you say Lu Lu
Landry: What's your name?
Brynlee: mine? I Bwynlee Lay  (Translation - Brynlee Lane)

Guess you just had to be there....

Any-who...

Every since Landry was a couple months old, she has always had issues with constipation. I have taken her to her pediatrician so many times trying to figure out something that would work for her. If you get grossed out easily, now would be the time to quit reading (Mitch) haha. When Landry would have a bowl movement, they were SO big and SO hard that they hurt! She would be so stiff legged and turn beet red. It got to the point where she would start shaking because she had to go so bad, but she knew it would hurt when it came out, that she began to hold it. With that being said, she became impacted and backed up. She would go days without pooping - and that is not good, especially for someone that little. A lot of people have asked me if it was because we were potty training - no - it started way before potty training ever began! Our pediatrician is the best and we Love her!! She had me do 2 pediatric enemas in one weekend. Of course, Brandon was out of town at this time. Since I had never had to do anything like this, I had my mom help me. We laid Landry down and did the enema...she screamed! That kid has some lungs! Within about 10 minutes, she had a bowel movement. This thing was huge...and hard! It resembled a golf ball...size, shape, firmness, etc. I promise, that is no exaggeration either. I felt SO bad for her. Since I didn't have a pull up on her at the time, she just went on the towel. Well, mom said it was fine, she was just going to throw the towel away. Somehow, she threw the wrong towel away and put that one (with the poop) in the wash machine. It went through the entire wash cycle, on HOT HOT and came out the exact same as it went in! That's when we knew for sure there was a problem! We went back Dr. Hull and she had me try a few more things. So we did what she suggested over the next few months.

At this point, there was nothing else that she could do. She referred us to a GI specialist at Cooks. I met with him. He ordered an x-ray to see exactly what things looked like. Those results came back and said that 3/4 of her colon had formed stool in it. So he had me do a "cleanse" on her. That cleanse consisted of: 1 cap full of miralax a day (3 times a day), 1 adult ex-lax per day and 2 enemas. All in a 5 day time frame. WOW!! Yes that worked some, but I just knew there was so much more in there. So he had us to it again. Only this time, I told him I was not doing the enemas. She would get to where she wouldn't trust us when we went to change her diaper. She would say "no more medicine in my bottom?!" I just couldn't do that to her anymore. Again, not a whole lot of change. She was going more and it was the consistency that he wanted (applesauce/pudding) but it was going around what was stuck in there, so it wasn't moving the hard part out. He suggested we do one more thing...and that was to do 1 cap full of miralax every hour - for 6 hours. (We got about half way through it before she wouldn't drink anymore of it.) I called on Monday morning and let his nurse know how that went. He wanted to see us on Wednesday and we would discuss our next plan of action. He decided that he would admit her and do a "heavy cleanse".

We went to Cooks about mid day Friday. They gave her an IV for fluids. The first one they tried, was bad...it blew. The second one worked, but she screamed louder. The third and final thing they had to do was the absolute worst! The NG tube. (Her and Brynlee both had one when they were in the NICU, so I didn't think much of it.) This is a tube that they stick in her nose and it goes all the way down to her tummy and get the medicine directly there. I had to walk out when they were putting the NG tube in her. She was screaming and gagging and started throwing up. It just broke my heart and I couldn't watch it any longer. I felt so helpless! Let me rephrase that, it isn't "medicine" they gave her - it is what adults drink when they have to have a colonoscopy. It's called "Go Lightly". Being that they knew she wouldn't drink it, this was the only way to get it down her. Poor Brandon - he is one trooper! He was holding her while the nurses were putting the NG tube in her. I know it broke his heart in to a million pieces! He was so strong for her though! Once they got the tube in and we got her calmed down, they starting pushing the Go Lightly through the tube. She was on a clear liquids diet but didn't really want to drink anything. She was able to go on a wagon ride around the halls and we pulled her IV pole with us. It was kind of hard, because when she would get out of the wagon and wanted to walk by herself, she didn't understand that she was "attached" and couldn't run off or get too far away from us.

Finally after about 9 hours - it kicked in and started working. We heard her tummy rumbling and making all kinds of noises. Now, if you know Brandon and I, you know that I don't do throw up and he doesn't do poop. So we balance each other out there. Landry was tooting at first, and the smell...oh my gosh, the smell. Awful! She had her first bowel movement about 1 am on Saturday morning. Once that started, it was about every 15 minutes or so. Needless to say, none of us got much sleep at all. It was about the 2nd BM that she had, when Brandon lost it! I had him in the bathroom throwing up (from the smell) and Landry had poop everywhere. I had to call a nurse in to help me because Brandon was out of commission. I mean, we had to change sheets, blankets, clothes...the whole 9 yards! This went on throughout the night and lasted until about 7 am when the Go Lightly stopped (which was ONE GALLON!!) There were a couple times when it was bad that Brandon had his shirt up over his nose or a blanket wrapped around his face - anything to block the smell. About 9 am, they came and did an x-ray to see if she was cleaned out. Praise the Lord...she was! By the time the doctor made his rounds and told us we could go home, it was about 4 pm. While waiting on the discharge papers, Brandon and I took her downstairs at Cooks and let her do a Build A Bear. She loved it! We let her pick everything out. She was so excited to get out of there and see her sisters! It was so sweet, when we got home, Brynlee was standing next to her and started rubbing her back and said "Hi Stister. Hi Stister."

We are glad to be home and hope to never have to go through that again! Here are a few pictures of our adventure...don't worry, there are no gross ones! Thank you so much for all the prayers, texts, calls, etc that we got. We really appreciate it!

What perfect timing!! I was behind this truck on the way to pick Landry up so we could head to the hospital. (Wonder if they make hospital calls....)

After we got the IV's

Trying to get a little rest

We got out for a wagon ride.

That wore us out - taking a little nap.

Watching Mickey Mouse!

Finally...completely zonked out!

Saturday - after x-ray but before they took tube and IV's out.

We got to go downstairs to Build A Bear Workshop

This is my happy little girl!

Ready to break out of this joint!

Showing off her bear she made.