MealZ on WillZ

...things are in a mess even though you've pulled things together the best you humanly can :-

Trust in the Lord with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
In all your ways acknowledge Him
and He will make your paths straight.
~ Proverbs 3:5,6

It really should mean something to have had me holding on to it for 15 years.


WillZ

I don't mind where you come from
As long as you come to me
I don't like illusions I can't see
Them clearly

I don't care no I wouldn't dare
To fix the twist in you
You've shown me eventually
What you'll do

I don't mind…
I don't care…
As long as you're here

Go ahead tell me you'll leave again
You'll just come back running
Holding your scarred heart in hand
It's all the same
And I'll take you for who you are
If you take me for everything
Do it all over again
It's all the same

Hours slide and days go by
Till you decide to come
And in between it always seems too long
All of a sudden

And I have the skill, yeah I have the will
To breathe you in while I can
However long you stay
Is all that I am

I don't mind…
I don't care…
As long as you're here

Go ahead tell me you'll leave again
You'll just come back running
Holding your scarred heart in hand
It's all the same
And I'll take you for who you are
If you take me for everything
Do it all over again
It's always the same

Wrong or right
Black or white
If I close my eyes
It's all the same

In my life
The compromise
I close my eyes
It's all the same

Go ahead say it you're leaving
You'll just come back running
Holding your scarred heart in hand
It's all the same
And I'll take you for who you are
If you take me for everything
Do it all over again
It's all the same

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


WillZ

..., when I am alone - walk me through my nightmares, Lord.

Proverbs 13:12
Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Humbly I bow, needing You now
Drawn by my desperation
Do I deserve, this time You reserve
For friendship and conversation?

Your voice, unmistakable
I believe You when You say to me:

"I’ll never, no never,
I’ll never ever stop loving you
My precious possession
There is no end to what we can do
Unconditional, forever,
I’ll never stop loving you"

Boldly I stand, taking Your hand
Still drawn by my desperation
Longing to hear, You calling me near
For friendship and conversation

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Remind me again...
That everything that takes place in my life has a purpose, every single tiny thing.

Remind me again...
That You are always in the process of making me, that the difficult moments I go through are for the future.

Remind me again...
That it is all about others.

Remind me again...
That You feel the pain I feel, You weep when I weep, that You don't like it either.

Remind me again...
That I was a great joy to be with.

Remind me again...
That this is so not wrong... that You are so looking forward to it.

Remind me again...
That I am significant, that I am validated by You alone.

Remind me again...
That You are shouting, "Keep at it... Don't give up on Me! You're so close... Don't give up! A few more steps, you can, you can..."

Remind me again...
That this is exactly how You wanted things to be, that this is no mistake, that I will be overjoyed... overjoyed... uncontainable gratitude for Your unmistakable timing and work behind the scenes.

Remind me again...
That I do my part, and You'll do Yours.

Remind me again...
To be patient... patient... patient...

Remind me again...
That this is that I may be complete, lacking nothing.

Remind me again...
That this is all for love.


WillZ

People ask me if I wonder why I do the things I have chosen to do, I do.

I often ask the Lord why at the end of the day I always have to do things that my heart says no to. To choose to do something just because it is the way things are, and never because that is the way of my heart.

I lament. I will still continue to lament. But my weaknesses and complaints doesn't change the fact that God is who He says He is.


WillZ

James 2:20-24
You foolish man, do you want evidence that faith without deeds is useless? Was not our ancestor Abraham considered righteous for what he did when he offered his son Isaac on the altar? You see that his faith and his actions were working together, and his faith was made complete by what he did. And the scripture was fulfilled that says, "Abraham believed God, and it was credited to him as righteousness," and he was called God's friend. You see that a person is justified by what he does and not by faith alone

2 Corinthians 1:3-5
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows.


WillZ

Oh Lord, You're beautiful
Your face is all I seek
For when Your eyes are on this child
Your grace abounds to me

I want to take Your Word and shine it all around
First, help me just to live it, Lord
And when I'm doing well
Help me to never seek a crown
For my reward is giving glory to You

Oh Lord, please light the fire
That once burned bright and clear
Replace the lamp of my first love
That burns with holy fear

Be personal to me, Lord. Show me that You care.
And even if You don't, I know You do not need my help to prove that You are God.
A minute at a time, that's how I'm gonna cope.

How else can I live?


WillZ

This is going to be a well deserved break since the first week of August. I hope I rest well. At the end of it I may not come out of it having a change in circumstances and experiencing a smooth sailing journey thereafter, but I hope to have caught on to the fact that Christ sits in my boat while it rocks.

Jesus I'm weak and weary
I've been away too long
My eyes are lost and teary
Lord where have I gone wrong?

You're the only one who knows what I need.
From the cries of my heart to the way that it bleeds;
Although in recent days we may hardly speak,
You know my desires and the way that it reads.


WillZ

Hold on now your exits here
It's waiting just for you
Don't pause too long
It's fading now
It's ending all too soon you'll see

Soon you'll see

It's a lil scary to turn my head and look back. Even if I turned my head, my eyes would be closed... I wouldn't dare look. Bring me to that place. I've tasted it once before. Bring me there. Where I can look back and know I've won. What do you do when you're afraid to look back or even think a day ahead? You just look at today, count the hours before you go to bed, wake up, and find that it's today again.

Call me again to bravery. To burn with courage. To roar with strength. To discover my purpose. To capture the day.


WillZ

In every circumstance, praise the Lord.
Make Your face shine upon me.
Let those who sow in tears reap with joy.

Psalm 56:8 -
You've kept track of my every toss and turn through the sleepless nights,
Each tear entered in your ledger, each ache written in your book.

Only God knows what these tears are for... only God knows...


WillZ

I'd never be able to comprehend coping with the death of someone I love dearly. I think I will be affected for a long long time... there will be so much pain and broken-heartedness expressed through my singing, playing and daily living.

The certainty of it happening makes me wonder...
Is there something I can put in place now to help me in the future?


WillZ

Lord, if You can, can You make sure things do not unfold that way?
Being the so-not-optimist that I am, I think that is how it's gonna be like...
Even then...can or not? :|
I ask for grace... be patient with me? :|


WillZ

Okay, so I'm officially cracked...
Slippery slop...

So how? Boh lat already you know... Jia lat until boh lat...
Really no reason right?
ZzzZzZZZ...
Like some of you, I too can't wait for the morning to come..
When we can actually WAKE UP!
I know I've come this far... sometimes I want the far to end...
Have we got it wrong? Cannot be right...
I guess we just can't give up la ya?...


WillZ

...and for those I am about to miss...
congrats...
I'm sure you miss me too...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This is forever
Always together
This ain't no part-time love affair

Autumn leaves
Are falling, falling
Sudden change in color scheme
Then winter comes
Calling, Calling
Freezing every part of me
And that is the way we are,
We move in the seasons
Something never changes

This is forever, always together
This ain't no part-time love affair
This is forever, always together
And I will be falling in love over and over again

Springtime's here
We're growing, growing,
Drinking honey with the bumblebees
Then summer's here
Falling over my shoulder,
Warming every part of me
And that is the way we are
We move with the seasons
Something never changes

Over and over and over and over
Over and over and over and over
Over and over and over and over again

Paul Colman Trio - This Is Forever

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"miss" is a weird word. miss. miss. miss.


WillZ

...but the greatest of these is love.

Love is not something we can comprehend with our mind. It cannot exist without the mind yet it cannot exist with just the mind. Essentially love comes from the heart and the heart goes on whether or not we are capable of feelings. As long as we still live, we still love. The removal of the heart precedes the removal of love. The removal of love is the removal of life - ...the cold ...the dark.

This is why many fight to love, and for love...

Love brings forth life.


WillZ

I know, closing my eyes won't change anything...
It's so real, and I don't want to think that I'm the only one...
How? Or is this the fact of life?
I want to not doubt.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was just for a brief 5 seconds maybe, but for that moment I felt alive... warm... and I conquered the world. The look on that face was priceless.
These are the type of dreams that make you smile when you're asleep, and make you cry when you're awake.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thanks. And I'm sorry.


WillZ

...got such thing as "discuss" to have a public holiday. How nice. |>CLICK<|


WillZ

...detached and numb.
And it doesn't have to be grand.
Auto pilot will do.
Wake me up when it's time for you to go.
You don't have to stay if you don't want to, you know.
I'll take a backseat I don't mind,
I just don't want to be left behind.
Give me something to work on.


WillZ