Melonie's Mind

Thursday, October 30, 2014

What its been a year? WHAT NOT TO WEAR FOR HALLOWEEN 2014

Let's be honest. You don't look like this:

or this:

or even this: (Just thought I'd throw this in for cuteness sake)

So, you probably should not be wearing pumpkins this year:

no matter where you place them

orange just doesn't look good on anyone.

evidence:

Don't go as a Fat pumpkin

or a Skinny pumpkin.

And if you are thinking of being a pumpkin head…in all its shapes and sizes,

It just doesn't work. Even if you are the Pumpkin Master.

and please,

don't do the Pregnant Pumpkin:

But if you are going to put a pumpkin on your body parts:

GO ALL OUT!

Now this is something you can wear for Halloween 2014!

Thursday, October 31, 2013

WHAT NOT TO WEAR FOR HALLOWEEN 2013

Its Halloween evening and maybe you are going through your closet trying to come up with some last minute Halloween costumes. Here are some suggestions of what not to choose.

Maybe you wear this every other day of the year, but Halloween is just not the day to wear this one. It just doesn't scream give me a "treat"...although it might scream "trick."

Boobs are all the rage again, it seems. I just don't see what the big deal is...I can go look in the mirror. Who needs a costume?

If you look very closely. This is all the same guy showing us what not wear. I'm so grateful he took the modeling job so I can write my post this year.

Poor birds, though.

This could be the same guy as Mr. Winter..Yep, I think it is.

Yep, He's hot and he knows it, but I PROMISE YOU, you will not

be if you wear this costume.

Always lots of human genitalia in the Halloween roundup, but 2013 is

a stunner year of choices.

We move to the other side of the body.

These costumes are actually kind of clever for your polygamist Halloween family get together.

but what if, by chance, you have to leave your group of three and go over to the punch table?

What if, by chance, you are wearing the "rock" costume? People

just might mistake you for an elephant turd and that is just not

going to be hit with your new in-laws.

I actually saw this guy on the beach in 1987.

Angry Gingerbread man with lollipop devil's fork. Its tempting to wear, I know.

Pink gorillas are just not that scary.

Willy Wonka: "I want you to roll Miss Beaurgarde into the boat and take her along to the Juicing Room at once. They're gonna squeeze her. Like a little pimple."

You could stand by the guest bathroom in case anyone runs out.

I have actually

seen a few Hollywood actresses in bottoms like this,

so I say, GO FOR IT!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!!!!!!!

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

What, another year?

Its been almost a year since I have posted on this blog. I CAN'T BELIEVE IT! Rereading it though has made me miss posting. I'm sorry it has been so long. We were kidnapped by aliens and made to wear tinfoil hats for almost a year. See evidence here:

However, my hat accidentally got knocked off while chasing a unicorn and suddenly my life, this blog, my schooling, the book I had been reading, even my religion all came back to me in an instant....and I'm here, with you, again. Happy September.