Stylin' in The Desert

I'm just wondering - I mean I know that Annie and Caroline and Amy and Tatum and Erin and Elaine and Catherine's mom sometimes do. But it sort of seems like last year's thing. So many of us seem to be doing something else. I've been knowing that I should write something new, but for the life of me.... what is there to write about? Nothing funny has happened for me lately. School has robbed me of any real life for the last two months. And political commentary is boring. So what is left? I could write about selling our home of 23 years, but that is so sad to me. I could write about going to college again after swearing 30 years ago that I never would, but I'm almost done now and I survived. I could write about getting to see my two beauties and my son in love this week for Easter, but there isn't much to say except that I can't wait. I could just sign off and stop the madness. But I love reading the things that you say - even the really hard and sad things. There is something about knowing what you are struggling with that makes me feel part of your lives still. So please don't stop writing even if blogging is last year's thing.

Late on Friday afternoon, after the evening news shows, and without the presence of any press, President Obama quietly and seemingly in secret, signed an executive order reinstating federal funding for organizations who perform abortions in developing countries.

He had promised during the campaign to do this during the first week of his presidency. Groups who promote and perform abortions in poor countries expressed delight in the reversal of the policy of the Bush administration.

Nancy Pelosi said the new policy "will help save lives and empower the poorest women and families to improve their quality of life and their future."

Your money and mine will now be used to kill babies around the world.

Just thought you'd want to know.

I feel the need to write a new post. My last effort was an expression of sadness and I can't stay in that place. The trouble is that I'm not sure how to proceed to a happier place. I am cursed with terminal honesty. I have never been even a little bit good at hiding things especially how I feel. But now I am determined to "put on a happy face". So I need some coaching. If you have any tips I sure would love to hear them. It would be easier if I was where I could laugh with my BFF's. I promised myself years ago that I wouldn't become one of those angry, bitter old women. So I'm looking to become a sweet and happy old woman. Help!! Make me laugh like Annie did with the post about her pregnant friend Schmolly who I miss like crazy. I watch some funny shows sometimes - Everybody Loves Ray, Jon and Kate & 8, The Office - that's stupid, I don't care what you say, Cosby, MASH. (Okay, I'm old) Beth Moore makes me laugh oten, Dave Barry is hilarious, Mark Fritchman and his boys are hilarious, Mikey B and Caroline are hilarious, my son-in-law Tom is very hilarious. I love to hear my daughters' laugh. Baby laughter is the best - you can't help but laugh when they laugh. Maybe I should hang out with more babies..... Maybe you could search for funny things and send them to me or say funny things to me. Come on - let's laugh!!!

I'm sure that there are many of you in the blog-land who are celebrating today with what seems to be the entire world over the election of the first black president of the US. If that is you, then you may want to stop reading this blog right now and go on to happier posts by happier bloggers.

I'm not happy today. In fact, today I am grieving. This is a deep, deep sadness. I've never, ever felt this sad about an election in the 37 years that I've been able to vote. I've been mad about elections, disappointed about elections, apathetic about elections. But I've never been sad about an election. My sadness is on several levels.

1. I'm sad that because of his stand on some issues I couldn't vote for the first black man to run for president. The most overwhelming of these is the issue of the murder of the unborn. In some ways this election was a vote on this issue. At least for me and others who have fought the atrocity of abortion for so long. This is a historically significant event in our nation's history. I can rejoice that we have come so far since the segregated days of my childhood. But I am grieving for the babies whose lives mean so little to so many and to our coming president.

2. I'm sad that so many voted for a man who they know so little about. I could be wrong, but it looks to me like he was elected mainly because he is black. Because how cool and enlightened is it that we are able to vote for and elect a black man in a country that had slavery until 140 years ago? He was swept in on a tide of needing to prove to ourselves that it could be done. Nothing else seemed to matter - his stance on abortion, his stance on Marxism, his radical associations. The fawning of Obama's followers was embarrassing. The media never met a candidate they loved more. We as a nation seem to be in love with ourselves and how "open-minded" we are now. Am I wrong to think that this is also racism?

3. I'm sad that we seem to have come to a tipping point in our country. The tipping is away from the traditional values that I tried to raise my children with and that I believe are scripturally based. The slide started years ago in the early adult years of my generation. Since then the shift toward an increasingly Godless society has accelerated every year. This year, I fear, marks the tipping year. It seems that there are now more who prefer a Godless America than there are who truly fear God and reverence His word and statutes. I am partly to blame for the slide. I will forever regret the part I played in disrespecting the values passed down to us from the generations before us. Youth is a wonderful time of life. But as I've learned from experience, wisdom belongs to those who have lived life. If I had known then what I know now! Sadly, it seems that when we are young, the wisdom of our elders looks like foolishness. It seems like each generation has to learn from their own mistakes. That makes me very sad for my children and future grandchildren and the young people who I lift before the LORD daily.

4. I am sad because I believe that the LORD chastises His people and gives them over to the desires of their hearts to their great peril. Oh LORD have mercy on us! We are a people who have sinned greatly against You and have disregarded your precepts and statutes. Do not lose patience with us. We love you LORD and we trust in You and your redemptive power. There is no way that we can go wrong that You cannot redeem. Teach us to love each other the way you do. Teach us to love the things that You love and to hate the things that You hate.

I am sad today. Very sad. I can't even think of anything today that makes me smile -

- unless it is my loving husband, my beautiful daughters and niece, my wonderful son-in-love, my sweet nephew-in-law, my great-nieces, my sweet heart-daughter Nikki, my adopted grand-boys, and my dear sisters and brothers in the Spirit. These make me smile today and every day.

My joy is from the LORD and it is a joy that no event in this life can touch. We have a new president today. I commit to pray for him and his family and for our nation because it is commanded that we do so and because God changed my heart and I know that HE can change others' too. I commit to pray for President Obama because he is the president of all of us. May God bless him and all of us too.

Once you haven't blogged in a while, it gets harder and harder to get back in the swing. I think that June 2nd (my last post) is way past the point of no return. Sorry for my absence from the blogging world to those who care. You know - busy summer and all and starting back to college (another post on this later maybe) have gotten in the way. I understand that most of you are Face-booking it nowadays. Not going to do it! Too complicated and too many things to look at there. It is just like technology and pop-culture to change on me just when I get up the courage to take the plunge. Well, I'm revolting! Not as in gross and disgusting. Revolting - as in I'm not gonna do it! So I may be the last one standing in the blog world as the rest of you pass me by. But I'm not gonna do it I say!!

Anyway - I've now been tagged by two sweet people - Andrea and my dear Katie. So, I'm going to blog on six quirks of mine. I actually think that since I've been lucky enough to be tagged twice, I should be allowed twelve quirks. But since I am struggling to find six, I'll take out my allowance on tagging six friends. This is sort of like a chain letter idea. Which thought brings me to my first quirk:

1. I hate, hate, hate chain letters and/or anything that requires me to ask my friends to do something they may not want to do. In spite of the fact that most people think of me as bossy, I'd rather do things myself than ask someone else to do it.

2. I don't like to eat out. I'm a decent cook and I am nearly always disappointed when we spend money on what turns out to be inferior food. Cook some good home-cooking for me and I'll love you forever. But going out to eat doesn't impress me. I'll go just to be with you and enjoy your company. But the food is always better at home.

3. In college (not quite a hundred years ago), I wanted to be a country-western singer. Never mind that I couldn't sing. I think I really wanted the clothes - a fringed vest - and the name - Dixie Debbie Lee. This quirk and the confessing of it in cell group is why you may have heard Don Davis call me Dixie.


4. I'm not afraid of bugs. Both of my daughters have what I consider to be an exaggerated fear or loathing of insects. They each have their own aversions to particular bugs. They didn't get it from me. I take after my grandmother who used to pick up bees and yellow jackets with her fingers and throw them out. She also shot rattlesnakes in our backyard and once a mountain lion when she lived in the Arizona desert. Wow!


5. Naps are important to me. I seldom get to take a nap. But each morning when I get up I almost instantly start to figure out when I'll have time that day to nap. I get that from my Mom who always took an afternoon nap no matter what.


6. I am sure of this - I am the only one who is listing their quirks who can say that they were once in the circus. True - in high school in Tallahassee. I was in the Tallahassee Little Big Top Circus. I walked the high wire, flew high on the shoot-through ladder, and climbed all over a guy who rode on a bicycle with three other girls.


7. I cry about everything. I mean everything. This is so common that it hardly seems quirky for me - until I look around and see that no one else is crying.


So, there it is. More than I was tagged for. That wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. I apologize if my quirks are boring to you. They are after all my quirks. I have always thought of myself as extremely normal - nothing out of whack - nothing too interesting. I like that about me. I don't like to be noticed - I am honestly very shy - okay, maybe that is another quirk. I should call this quits right now before I get carried away and discover that I'm not normal at all. That would be upsetting.


So, I tag Kelly Davis, Kaye, Tatum, Mary Margaret, Heather, and Caroline. But only do it if you want to! I hate to ask you to do this, unless you are excited to do it. If you have already been tagged, then forget it and forgive me.

Here are the rules:
1. Link back to the person who tagged you - I don't know how to link to anything!
2. Mention the rules on your blog.
3. Tell 6 unspectacular quirks of yours - how can a quirk be unspectacular? Is the circus thing
too much?
4. Tag 6 fellow bloggers by linking to them - ditto
5. Leave a comment for each tagged blogger to let them know they've been tagged - this I can
do.

I'm not a believer in coincidence or randomness. My faith tells me that God has a plan and that He works all things for good for those who love Him. So I try to view every event as meaningful in some way. I'm also not the quickest to catch on to what is going on. But, I try to be observant and I really try to understand what God is teaching me. I'm still trying to figure out this moving to Arizona thing. I guess that you go through something like grieving when you go through a big change like this. Someone I met out here gave me two books - "After the Boxes are Unpacked" and "Who Moved My Cheese". The first one has made me realize that I'm not crazy. Sadness, anger, all the emotional reactions to loss are normal with a big change. The second one is a parable about some mice and a maze. I'm not good with parables, similes, metaphors or any other symbolic forms of communication. But there was a question in the story that is sticking with me: "What would you do if you weren't afraid? ". I think that the point of the book is that change is inevitable, get ready for it, go with it, embrace it, make it work for you. But - What would you do if you weren't afraid?

Today I was at Target doing my usual tour of the store. I was looking at the exercise outfits - like I'm going to take up exercise! No - that is not what I would do if I wasn't afraid. Here is what happened - I was minding my own business when I looked up and saw a woman walking toward me. She was very purposeful as she came up to me and I realized she was about to speak to me. "Your outfit looks so good" she said. Now you know that I like to look good. But I'm not lying when I say that there was nothing special about what I was wearing today. Black shorts and a very large green shirt. No one knows me here so I dress down quite often. When I thanked her, she proceeded to tell me her life story. Do people do that to you? They do to me with some frequency. You have to think when that happens that there are either a lot of crazies around or God is about to speak to you. I don't believe in randomness. This sweet lady wanted to tell me how she has been blessed by God with the daily awareness of His closeness and His love for her and she likes to take the time to be kind to others. She wasn't preaching the gospel to me, just wanting to bless me. She survived a terrible accident and her outlook on life was amazing. She wasn't attractive (large moles all over her face and very badly crooked teeth), but she was radiant with the joy of the LORD. I honestly have never seen anyone like her. Perspective dawned for a brief second for me. What in the world do I have to be sad over? As she left she said "I remind myself everyday that if He isn't walking beside me today, He is carrying me".

I could look at this as a random encounter with "someone special "- that's what she called herself! But I want to believe this was a divinely orchestrated meeting. And I want to remember her and what she said. I want what she has - no fear.

What would I do if I wasn't afraid? I'd speak life to someone I don't know who needs a touch from the LORD every chance I get. What would you do?

I've been asking myself a question for several months. Just what is a blog? No one seems to have an answer that tells me what it really is or is supposed to be. So as I sit with this computer beside my window in Phoenix, I'm still wondering. Maybe what I should ask is: Is this for me or for those who read it? Is this a place to bear my heart and soul? Or a place to talk to whoever happens to read this? Am I supposed to be entertaining? Or do I just go with a stream of consciousness and hope that I hit on something that has meaning somehow or someway?

It is always good to be funny. In fact, I believe that being funny ranks really high on most people's list of character traits they look for in friends and relationships. I have always said that our family is not funny. My daughter Katie doesn't like that I don't think we're funny. But I'm just being honest. I know some really funny people. And we can't compare to them. Now, don't get me wrong - we have lots of laughs and fun. And now that Tom is part of the family, our funny quotient has definitely gone up hugely. He is purely funny! Maybe it is enough to recognize funny when you see/hear it. I hope so. I've heard that laughing and smiling is actually physically good for you. Endorphins, etc. I can't remember all of the benefits. I know for sure that laughing is one of the only antidotes to the sadness of this world. So, I think that it is my new goal to laugh more each day and to smile a lot, even when I'm alone. So if you see me smiling a lot (which you won't because I'm in AZ), I haven't turned daft (or "funny" as Celestine Sibley would say).

I'll be laughing and smiling a lot in two weeks when our family converges in Birmingham to celebrate Erin's graduation from Samford University. It will be the first time that we have all been together since last Christmas (Jessye my niece and her daughter will be there). I used to take being together for granted. Now each time is a gift. I can't wait to see them all and squeeze them and hear them laughing.

So all this, and what I really wanted to say is - I love and am so proud of Erin and the way she has allowed the LORD to mold her and grow her. She set herself a goal and she made it happen. Thank you LORD for your grace and goodness and provision. Good job Baby Girl! We are all blessed by you. Your hard, hard work will pay off on the 17th with that degree. And by the way - you are really funny!