Well, it's a new year. Hanging up a new calendar brings a flurry of conflicting emotions for most. There's depression that the holidays are over. Stress over paying off the December credit card bill. Feeling of doom returning to work. And then there are the emotions of hope for a new beginning. Excitement about making new goals and working toward them. Happy that the previous year has come to an end.
While 2013 wasn't a particularly GREAT year for me, it wasn't so bad, either. I'd say the scale tipped slightly to the favorable. On the one side, I was terribly sick with the flu at the beginning of the year while attending my Grandma's funeral, and then I injured my knee that I have had to deal with all year, sidelining me from all the races I normally run. I also didn't get to participate in any triathlons in 2013. This was a drastic difference from 2012 in which I participated in a total of 20 races; 6 of them triathlons. But on the other side, I made the decision to go back to school, minutely scrutinized my finances and made some changes, and I also started my own business. Never mind the strengthening of friendships that really fulfilled my life and always the never-ending love and support from my family. Yes, life is good.
Lately, I've been reading books, researching, meditating and finding TED Talks regarding getting in touch with who I really am, my inner passions & desires and how to be a better person by finding happiness within myself regardless of outside influences and making conscious choices in my life to get to where I want to be. A lot of the things that have made a big impact on me lately are found in the book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. So instead of making resolutions of getting back in race shape, losing a few pounds, training and participating in races, working out a certain number of days per week, etc, I'm going to take a different approach. Namely:
- Appreciate my body and its abilities; don't get discouraged comparing it to others or to previous performance abilities. Be smart and listen to it. Be patient with recovery and getting back in the groove.
- Be more kind to others.
- Don't get angry in traffic.
- Be slow to judge; don't jump to conclusions or assume something as truth without taking the time to understand where somebody is coming from and getting the full picture. (1)
- Try to keep a positive attitude. Especially when things go wrong. (2)
- Find something every day to be grateful for and write it down.
- Remember that just because somebody sees something differently than me doesn't mean that they are wrong and I am right. (3)
- Be more openly honest with people. Don't be ashamed of my feelings or thoughts.
- Admit and sincerely apologize when I make mistakes instead of trying to justify them or blame them on outside forces. (4)
- Ease up on the complaining.
- Have the courage to step outside my comfort zone in order to grow my character. (5)
- Connect and re-connect with those I care about; let people know when I'm thinking of them.
- Remember my priorities and don't let them get compromised.
(1) “Seek first to understand, then to be understood.” - Stephen R. Covey
(2) “It's not what happens to us, but our response to what happens to us that hurts us.” ― Stephen R. Covey
(3) “Two people can see the same thing, disagree, and yet both be right. It's not logical; it's psychological.” ― Stephen R. Covey
(4) “It is one thing to make a mistake, and quite another thing not to admit it. People will forgive mistakes, because mistakes are usually of the mind, mistakes of judgment. But people will not easily forgive the mistakes of the heart, the ill intention, the bad motives, the prideful justifying cover-up of the first mistake.” ― Stephen R. Covey
(5) “Courage isn't absence of fear, it is the awareness that something else is important” ― Stephen R. Covey
Some other Stephen Covey quotes that resonated with me (I'm only a little more than halfway through this book! Seriously, such great stuff):
“Inevitably, anytime we are too vulnerable we feel the need to protect ourselves from further wounds. So we resort to sarcasm, cutting humor, criticism -- anything that will keep from exposing the tenderness within. Each partner tends to wait on the initiative of the other for love, only to be disappointed but also confirmed as to the rightness of the accusations made.”
“...churchgoing is not synonymous with personal spirituality. There are some people who get so busy in church worship and projects that they become insensitive to the pressing human needs that sourround them, contradicting the very precepts they profess to believe deeply.”
“Be patient with yourself. Self-growth is tender; it’s holy ground. There’s no greater investment.”
“Trust is the glue of life. It's the most essential ingredient in effective communication. It's the foundational principle that holds all relationships.”
“Trust is the highest form of human motivation.”
Those last 2 quotes really hit home to me. I put HUGE value on trust and honesty. Once lost, it takes a lot to regain. I WANT to trust people. Sadly, I've become a cynic and I sometimes expect people to prove to me that I can trust them -- even when they've given me no reason to DISTRUST them. This is something that I am working on. I can't let my past rule my future and sabotage all my relationships. I need to choose to react differently. Additionally, I need to conduct myself in such a way that people know I am trustworthy.
Anyway, this year, I'm choosing to focus on bettering myself from the inside. By building and strengthening my relationship with myself, I feel I can offer more to the relationships I have with others.
Three more resolutions:
- Commit myself to do well in school.
- Commit to building my business.
- Commit to staying organized.
