Wednesday, November 30, 2005
my swimming days.black and tight. haha.
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3:47 PM
swimmm
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3:42 PM
swimming days
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3:41 PM
.swimming.
i miss swimming.
i was reading the newspaper today and saw how well the swimmers had fared this year. so proud of them. and congrats to the waterpolo team as well.
argh.
i have not touched waterpolo ever since I ORDed. Suxs.
I really missed the life of having NO spare tyre, no examinations to worry, and having ALL the time solely for my own pleasure.
Nowadays, I can't seem to find time to do other things.
During attachment days when I was still in NS, i get to swim from 9-4 everyday. argh.
I REALLY MISS THOSE DAYS.
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3:32 PM
Tuesday, November 29, 2005
.my very first uni grade.
P is sitting right opposite me now.
We just got back my comms results. My very first GPA score. A 3.3. B+.
Happy?
Nah.
Not when I am mixing around with all the people who are doing better than me.
Big fish in a small pond? Or Small fish in a big pond? P asked which fish I wanna be.
I dunno. I only heard of Big Fish, not Small Fish.
Can I be .... a big fish in a big pond?
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4:40 PM
.contented.
i feel so fortunate having only 2 papers this term. *phew* and.... the schedules of the examinations. ( 1 on monday, 1 on friday )
by right, given the amount of time to study, there shouldn't be any excuses not to score.... but... everybody is given the same privilege! *except for some*
ermm. but i love FA. (:
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2:04 PM
Monday, November 28, 2005
.when you know...
you know you could have done better... but u didn't fare as well.
you know you were prepared, but still you made unneccessary silly mistakes which costed you 15 marks.
argh.
still, the feeling wasn't as bad as compared to the mid terms.
just hope i could pull my stats grade to an A- AT LEAST, but I am prepared for a B though.
disappointed? a little.
satisfied? a little.
relieved? absolutely.
now i am just depending on my only hope of getting an A. FAFAFA.
ha.
got programmes on friday and saturday already. so exciting!
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7:42 PM
Saturday, November 26, 2005
.presentation.
f up i should say.
it wasn't the presentation. just the people. and how it ended. somehow it sucked.
but i guess army had trained me well to deal with such people anyway.
but i thought army should have trained men to be more responsible and cooperative?
doesn't seem so actually.
i was glad though when i felt i was the PAP today.
I really didn't want such an awkward ending, but i guessed. whatsoever.
thanks J for speaking up. didn't expect you to be so bold actually. you are my brother man. can i kiss you? ha.
somehow it wasn't a good day for me today.
the photos i took today were horrible la. fucking fat, fair and fugly. i think it must be the mixed emotions.
my love handles are getting damn obvious. and i really really missed those days when i get to exercise everyday. // keep me awake. keep me fit. keep me confident.
nowadays i just feel like hiding at home. ha.
mugging for my finals. i better do well this time.
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12:21 AM
Thursday, November 24, 2005
sa all the way (:
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2:17 PM
funny right
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2:15 PM
.taking things for granted?.
how will you feel if one of your friends delivers a cup of hot milo right in front of you while you are in the midst of mugging?
touched? elated? super touched? nonchanlant?
for me, i will be really touched and i will think of ways to repay him/her the next time round.
however, will you be equally/more touched if it's your mother who brought you the hot milo instead?
erm. yes to some? congrats. you are super filial.
for me, with some sense of guilt, i will be touched, but not THAT touched. actually, sometimes i tend to feel it's nothing. *shame*
somehow, it's often the people closest to you whom you neglect- their care and concern, love and whatever.
you will try to repay a classmate's kindness, a friend's kindness, your relative's kindness, a stranger's kindness .... anybody's kindness except the one closest to you.
so unfair isn't it? they put in more effort than others, but get less recognition.
don't you think sometimes you tend to treat a stranger, a friend whom you just know .. or even your DOG better than the people closest to you ?
are you still as polite to your girlfriend whom you have got together with 3 years ago?
do you still bother asking when you need to borrow your friend's laptop charger?
do you even bother to smile at your parents when you see them at home? (i do)
come on, say no.
can't be helped?
i agree.
but it's illogical and dumb some sort.
this week had been a good week.
i got showered with vitamins, cod liver oil capsules, countless cups of green tea, delicious home-cooked food, and lots and lots of love from my beloved mother + dad.
i love them.
i feel touched.
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1:49 PM
Wednesday, November 23, 2005
.so damn relieved.
phew.
this came out when i finally printed out my very last LTB cover page!
projects projects projects.
i finally settled everything.
J was saying why I am so anxious over all the projects.
erm. I wonder why too. but i guess.. that's me la. &^(&#@
i remember getting full marks for my D&T folio last time, topping the whole level. so darn satisfied. no sharing of grades. shiok.
i am a presentation whore i guess. i want everything to be presented nicely. it gives me orgasm. lol.
erm. ... but i don't shave sometimes. ha. contradicting huh. or a little out of point? just trying to say i am not presentable at times la.
wasted lots on printing. and i think i put in unnecessary effort sometimes..
argh. i should stop wasting time and carry on with my stats revision. i am supposed to finish my revision by tomorrow.
ermm.. i am still thinking of the incident that happened today. so scary.
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10:41 PM
.scary.
i had the worst fright of my life today.
i nearly got into trouble with one of my prof in school because i went into his office without his presence to get my quiz.
i didn't thought it was a serious issue since the door was wide open when i went there, and i actually told the security guard i needed to get the quiz.
but..... never did i know i will land myself into ... quite deep trouble.
as i went in and was finding my quiz from the huge stack of paper, one indian lady came in and somehow reprimanded me for being rude and daring to barge into his office to get the quiz! The strong headed me argued with her and i kept to my stand my intention was to get my quiz and i wasnt being rude because the email stated i can get the quiz from his office! and nothing states... with or without his presence!
maybe i was a little too stubborn i guess.
i was a little pissed off because i didnt know everybody would kick such a big fuss over a small matter!!
and so i took my quiz and went off stating i was rushing for time.
and.................. 20 minutes later,
my prof called me and started blasting me. he sounded really angry and said i bullied his staff!
omg. why would i do that. when did i do that? ha.
and so, i decided to talk to him face to face instead.
anyway i felt like a primary school kid because it seemed like i am going to the principal office for some punishment session. ha.
upon reaching his office, i thought i would be screwed..
but fortunately he was very reasonable and told me why i was being insensitive and so..
i totally agreed with him though, because i never knew somebody would be so SENSITIVE to not allow anybody to see their grades! i really didn't know that.
he even told me stories of how a minister got sued for peeping at some classified papers.
actually, i really admire my prof. at least he listened to my reasonings.
*relieved* at least i didnt land myself into deep trouble. he even wished me good luck for my fa exams and asked me to consult him if i need any help.
heng. phew.
so lessons learnt
BE SENSITIVE. DON'T LOOK AT OTHER PEOPLE'S GRADES. YOU THINK ITS NOTHING, BUT ITS ACTUALLY SOMETHING. DON'T ASSUME EVERYBODY IS LIKE YOU.
BE SENSITIVE.
yea. and also, i think i should be less strong headed sometimes.
this always land me into serious trouble.
but then again,
how many people get into trouble in university?
yea. we are so different.
and LTB has ended at last.
NO MORE LTB.
NO MORE.
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6:44 PM
Monday, November 21, 2005
.failed bids.
all my bids failed.
argh
now i can only take 4 modules next term.
shrugs.
and i just woke up.
exams just 1 week later. i better wake up since i screwed up my stats the other time round.
imagine the median mark is 78.5 and i ONLY got 64.5 . I realise getting an A now is like how impossible.
darn.
i hate university.
so competitive.
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2:08 PM
Sunday, November 20, 2005
.forgot to eat dinner.
went school to do my project today.. and guess what? i had NO time for lunch... and i forgot to eat my dinner.
can't believe I would ever be this hardworking. argh.
left school at 12am, and ended up @ holland v eating fish n chips.... and managed to catch the last honourable 5 minutes of Man U vs Charlton match. ha. ermm..
but weird enough, i felt really accomplished... though a little too drained out.
and yea.. i had another meeting tmr. sick.
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2:38 AM
Friday, November 18, 2005
.thinking.
3 months back, i remember having my car at my own expense . let it be going to the market, hawker centre, shopping centre, orchard road, or WHEREVER, i get to use the car. And this has been going on for the past 2 years ever since my dad got me my first car.
quite fortunate yea? i know, and i appreciate that.
but i started taking the bus again ever since school commenced. and... today i realise...
taking the bus is so damn boring.
sitting on the bus, listening to your own music, your mind starts wandering, having nothing to worry since you don't need to pay attention to the traffic...
but then again, it can be an enjoyment.
looking at cars, sitting with different strangers all the time, and getting to smell odour of .. err.. some people.. hha.
so out of point i know.
today i saw an ah ma. really old ah ma abt 80 plus driving a volvo on the road.. impressed.
i finally patronize crystal jade taka and also baker's inn @ paragon for the first time.. ha. such a mountain tortoise.
quizes are finally over. ltb and fa. erm. i think i did ok for both. not that bad.
i miss my classmates. not gonna be the same classes as most of them the next term.
argh.
i really love them because i know not everybody get such wonderful classmates in uni.
i saw xiaxue today @ isetan shaw house. errr.. photogenic la. (: ha. later get sued if i say anything nasty.
Lastly, you know my friend got sued and had to go court because she smsed "fuck you (name of person)" to a stranger? weirdd.
so tired.
slept for like 2hrs yesterday. need some sleep.
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11:13 PM
Thursday, November 17, 2005
spencer's
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9:48 PM
spencer's 21st
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9:45 PM
clubbing
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9:43 PM
more photos
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9:41 PM
more 21sttt
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9:40 PM
more 21st...
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9:39 PM
yea~!
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9:20 PM
my 21st...
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9:19 PM
Asoc day 1
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9:16 PM
fab 21st
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9:14 PM
halloween day!
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9:13 PM
misc
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9:11 PM
parrot 2
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9:04 PM
parrot 1
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9:03 PM
after presentation
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9:01 PM
comms individual 1
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8:59 PM
acting cool.
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8:56 PM
.lucky.
how often do you all feel lucky?
like...
striking a 4D?
missing a step and end up with clutches?...
or....
seeing your favourite celebrity?
picked up a $1,000 note?
saw the girl you almost admire?
winning a lucky draw?
getting good grades when you never put in much effort?
ermm...
NO.
I am feeling lucky today because...
I realise I have wonderful friends who buy coffee for me early in the morning.
I have friends who highlight my shortcomings so that I have the chance to improve.
I did well for my comms individual presentation despite many hiccups!
I have J who prints out notes for me all the time
I have T who wanna offer me a lift home
I have K who just doesn't wanna be my darling
I have P who plays minesweeper with me and keep me occupied during boring stats.
I have B who flimed my comms video.
I have T who lend me his FA notes to zap.
I have Z and C and P who occasionally msg me to say they miss me.
I have my parents who forgive me in my whatever wrongdoings.
I have S who helped me in my comms presentation.
and many many many.
really.
tell me now the reason of having so many friends?
feel popular, significant and important?
nah.
you just feel more secured.
one just need a few good friends.
I am glad I found them....
of course not forgetting my beloved parents & irritating bro and gf.
uploaded some nice photos.
take a look.
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8:43 PM
@breko
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6:36 PM
Tuesday, November 15, 2005
.fwah.
i am blardy pissed off.
you were beside me when I typed your account number, and after clicking "CONFIRM", you told me I keyed in the wrong number. fuck. Now where will my $$ go?
And you blardy blamed me. That made it worse.
floated away at
1:49 PM
Saturday, November 12, 2005
.tough life.
Yesterday, I was watching J's video about his hell training week while he was still in navy. Looking at the video clip, flashbacks of my training phase started appearing on my mind. I was wondering whether such tough trainings really did benefit us... or just scared the shit out of us and led us to be more determined to slack while we can. I remembered my life as a trainee wasn't that great either.
Lack of sleep, blardy torturous trainings... and all the unnecessary punishments... argh. I even remembered getting punished and tortured on MY 19th birthday!...
The video even captured moments when trainees couldn't even open their eyes while having their meals/ doing surveys etc. argh. it might seem funny for those who didn't experience this before... but it was definitely not a good feeling when u had to experience this ordeal. ha.. but then again, the sense of achievement and relief.... priceless.
Looking back my army life, i really cherish the life i am having right now. Despite having tons of stress... i no longer need to suffer traumatic experiences of carrying heavy loads, getting punished/fucked for no particular reasons and not being able to sleep when u really really felt so blardy tired.... and yea, i love school in a way (:
Yesterday I had a weird dream. I dreamt that my school had moved to NUS.. argh. I wondered what was I thinking.... and 3 nights ago, I dreamt that my lust candy asked me out. haha. love sweet dreams.
and... to all my dear friends who just got a break from their long r/s.... ( j and c ) , cheer up k? .. and to those who seem like they are dying from enormous stress due to their school work... ( cmyj especially... ), don't worry.. it will be over soon! be more optimistic! (:
and... to my dear friends who accepted me for who I am... erm. a big thank you :)
Slept for 16 hrs yesterday. The feeling was great since I had been missing out tons of sleep for the past few weeks... and now, i still have lots to do. Exams approaching, tons of quizzes, need to meet project deadlines. wow. many many things to worry abt!
I have decided not to go out for the next few weeks... maybe.. just a movie with s. *honoured?* haha.. for helping me so much with my presentation :P
K. time to mug. wasted my whole saturday already. damn blardy guilty.
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7:48 PM
Thursday, November 10, 2005
.exams.
exams are coming really quickly.
in a blink of eye, one semester is almost gone.
remember the first day of school when I felt so lost, and everybody was so unfamiliar with each other. no cliques. no close friends. enthusiastic about school. love the feeling of being a student again. hate the food at kopitiam. love bumping into people. stress-free.
now, i am no longer lost, no longer unfamiliar, try to minimise my visits to school. have great friends. dread studying. still hate the food at kopitiam. mug at library whole day. SUPER stress.
So different now. The hectic lifestyle and everything. What are we rushing for actually?
Nevertheless, I enjoy school. I make great friends, have occassional suppers, and have a great laugh sometimes.... and not forgetting taking moronic photos. ha.
I can't wait for exams to end. I can meet up with old pals, shop around @ orchard, and party more frequently!
And now... I have to go back to my STATS. (:
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12:18 AM
Friday, November 04, 2005
.losing it.
scrolling down my msn, seeing my list of friends increasing from 70 people to the now 300 people makes me realise if having so many friends is really necessary? How many of them do u actually talk to? How many of them do u actually feel are your friend?
In the past, having only 70 friends, its hard to miss out anybody. But now, as the list goes longer, it is not surprising that u start missing out on some of yr friends whom you use to chat a lot with. You forgot their existence. You are only concerned over new friends. And you never know they are still around until they say "hello".
My life has been great. Conversing with my friend today, I realise I had quite a fulfilling life in Uni. I tried out scuba diving, sailing, windsurfing, frisbee, performing and many many more. Of course, i got to know great friends whom I can share problems with, and to have fun with on days like on Halloween Day. I am proud to say I have a fair share of fun and stress. I am happy with it.
Right now, I am so pressurized over my comms presentation. I know it's impossible to be the best presenter overnight, but at least I know I tried my best. I have never been so hardworking in my entire life before, I promise. I studied for quizes as if they were major exams. I panicked when I do not understand my work. I can mug till 7am and not realise it is time to sleep. Marvellous.
But, trust me. I still value my old friends. My pri/sec school friends whom I grow up with, my JC classmates who love me for who I am, and many other friends I knew along the way!
And now, I am going back to my comms speech. :)
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12:30 AM
