the end of the roadi screwed up BIG time at todays match. really screwed and glitched everything that has ever occured to me life in tennis, everything i have build up over the last 4 year sunk straight into the ocean along with the titanic. you may say that it is just one match but shanny sees it otherwise. when something wrong happens, you need to blame something. well??? it is ALL the tennis racquet strings fault. i have finally found out that i HAVE the power all in this fat retarded lipid dominated body of mine and i do not need an extensive source of energy to create a ball that travels at the top speed of 200 km/h. i still prefer my 'prince lightning XX' i feel very handicapped without it, like as if it provides me my confidence on court.
got really pissed at myself at the begining of the match due to the fact that my hands cant keep one luminous ball in the context of the green rectangular. but then again it is not my fault that the strings are projecting more than 2 million ks of energy. cant play when i am pissed. *sigh*
took this from corinna's blog who took it from her friend's joe blog. it speaks a lot of my mood now considering that there are a lot pressure in every freeking aspect of my self pathicary life. tennis, studies, social life, future... but the bottom line is that my life sucks in general.
the end of the road
i paint a pretty picture
i paint it with a twist
i paint it with a razor blade
i paint it on my wrist
and if i paint it properly
a fountain will appear
and with this bloody fountain
my troubles disappear to continue on a lighter tone, people at school think that i am incapable of being a girl. by the image protrayed of myself in school, i really dont see why pp think of me in that way. some pp just finds it really funny of the idea of my wearing a skirt. so i did a self reflection on the bus on my way back from lunch. i had really needed to reflect on the person i truly am and the person i protray myself to be -
shanny in person personality traits1. loud - screams and talks at a thousand desibles over that of an aeroplane taking off. in built loudspeaker. happens to turn louder over the climaxing of excitement build-up. this may be due to past speach and drama classes and exams taken, projection of voice on stage has been everything. too bad it is very much innated into personality now.
2. talkative- non stop action of lips. diaphram seems to have excessive air. mouth have a brain of its own, thus two brains in shannys body.
this may be contriversal if shanny has bouts of PMS and mood swings3. self centered- mommy says so and i agree. if you do not have a tint of selfish bone in your body, you are VERY unlikely to succeed in the future if you wish to continue to stay in singapore.
in the real world, it is every man for himself. hates to do favour for pp
4. self absorbed- everything has to be about me.
5. rough- if you have seen the way i sit/stand/talk/wave hand while talking/shout/sleep/eat/play contact/bout anything, you will agree with this point. maybe i was born wrong. should have been Y choro-ed
6. neat- my room is spotless. other than the mess created by roommate (sis) generally a very neat person who have zero tolerance for dirt and mess. could be protentially a good house wife *choy* -touches a whole forest of wood-
7. dishonest- dont expect me to tell the truth all the time. but you always trust me to lie. does it all the time even i forget if it really is the truth or not. status of lying victim does not matter.
this is as far as i can think of in my entire 25 mins bus journey back.