Just came back from Phuket just yesterday. Arrived in Singapore to a dark ominous sky with raindrops falling in monsoon rain. Apparently it has been constantly this wet for the weekend. Even recieved a weather SMS from work once i landed at the airport saying:

"PROLONGUED MONSOON HEAVY RAIN WARNING
Widespread moderate to heave rain is expected to continue till midnight"

Heng i was on leave so not on standby. Apparently i recieved another one this morning that says 'expected till 6pm' before i headed off to work. What a perfect day for staying in bed and not waking up till the monsoon period is over. In fact, this morning, 70% of tweets and facebook updates are about the weather and wet weather related updates.

If only every month of the year has a couple of days like this. Cool, wet, sleep-under-a-few-layers-of-blankets days.

Oh well... back to Phuket. Summary - Weather there was nothing like here in Singapore, it was pleasantly cloudy, with tiny specs of sunshine and cool wind. I guess the Dec-Jan cool season like they said on the internet was true.

And for a start, I did not get a tan. AT ALL. You think that anyone who goes to Phuket will get a tan, but truth is that I dint spend that much time at the beach coz we were too busy eating and traveling around the island. Plus, assuming that we spend the same time on a sunny beach, Ron will get sunburn before I can get anywhere close to a tan line.

And as usual, the place is filled with Caucasians, from the beach to the roads to the everywhere.

Okay. While sorting out the very little photos that I took (coz Ron is not a photo person), here are some travel journal sketches I did.

Large and inaccurate sketch of all main beaches in Phuket

This is basically what happened in 12 hours of touchdown

Day 2: PhiPhi Islands day trip itinerary

Nothing fancy, will post pictures hopefully soon.

There is actually a disclaimer page which I read and felt was totally hilarious. The people of talkingcock.com are so funny


Definition of the term

TALKING COCK (v.)
a local Singaporean term meaning either to
talk nonsense or engage in idle banter.
-The Coxford Singlish Dictionary

Then there is this

SOME IMPORTANT THINGS TO NOTE:

1. WE MAKE STUFF UP. We do not engage in rumour, we indulge in humour and fiction. Do not believe or rely on what we write! If you do, you're even more cock than us!

2. WE ARE NOT A POLITICAL SITE. For all the kaypohs and muckrakers out there, we have completely no political agenda whatsoever. Our main aim is to celebrate all the nonsensical parts of Singaporean life. We make fun of people in every sector, strata and profession in a completely democratic way. (If you feel that you or people you know have not been made fun of, please let us know so that we can address the oversight.) Anyway, the good people in Parliament have already deemed us to be a non-political site. So there!

3. WE USE SOME STRONG LANGUAGE. We have employed in certain parts of this site language which might be upsetting to some and which some consider unsuitable for children. (Even though most kids would not only be manifestly familiar with the language used here, they're probably more comfortable with and adept at using the terms than you.)

4. IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE IN FREE EXPRESSION OR OPINION, GO SOMEWHERE ELSE. There are some among us who do not comprehend the value of satire or freedom of expression or even that other people are entitled to different opinions. There may even be some who do not even understand what satire is, and interpret everything at face value, and are the type given to filing or supporting defamation suits merely to avoid or quell criticism. If any of these descriptions fit you, please go and surf another site.

If you are therefore easily offended or outraged by strong language or biting, pointed and premeditated attacks on people and erstwhile values and mores, please SIAM now.

Wow. They seem to move so fast. I barely have enough to save for retirement and pay off my education loans and the letter arrives. Right before my birthday too. This is going to mark me paying taxes for the rest of my life - to a new beginning. And its not even April.

They even say at the front of the envelope

'GIRO your TAX and WIN CASH'

Are you going to giro your taxes to win cash? I think out of all these little competition I signed up for and joined (like your NTUC receipt, or magazine send ins, or your AXS condo win, or even lucky draw) I have never won anything i wanted. Much less getting cash for paying your taxes.

And it says at the back of the envelope:

'Our children are prepared for the future
Thank you for your contribution towards nation-building.'

Sometimes they know how to play satirical propaganda.

On a side note. I think I totally forgotten all my JC literature jargon. Almost forgot the difference between satire, irony, parody, juxtaposition, burlesque. Totally forgotten all the theatre jargons too. What Horatian and Juvenalian crap.

The first time i saw this advert on TV, was when my mom was watching 爱 and I was on my way to the kitchen to get a glass of water. I stopped and sat down to finish watching the ad. As i was watching it I really thought it was very beautifully done.

I've got to say its a very nice ad. Each part of the video is has beautifully taken motion. Reminds alot of the Australian Tourism ads years back.



Even the new Aussis's Tourism ad is very nice. Saw it late last year at the Ion, Wisma linkway. This reminded me of the Discovery channels advert. Love all these little singing adverts.

Its nice to be working with a bunch of people who are mostly plus minus five your age, are not married and have no kids to bother them and can spend another Friday night hanging out with drinks. Plus we have totally made this place at Bugis/Beach road area our little gathering spot for the last couple of Friday night drinks. This place called Nabins where drinks goes at around $5 a bottle (in a bucket) and the furnishing is nothing but couches and cushions.

Plus they have Kilkenny draught ready for my drinking. Not many places serve ales.

Remember me saying sometime in late December that in 2011 I'm going to drink less? Well, first thing in January and I can successfully say that it hasnt been going very well. I only had a Kilkenny and 2 bottles and I already feel like my year intake of alcohol is going over intended value.


Too bad the place is pretty dark inside and I couldnt take photos of the belly dancer that comes in at 8 or 9 or much less anyone on the other side of the table.

I think in the short one year I am working, I've already shown the rest of the team my hidden crazy self (all the hand-waving and fake-acting antics). And I thought before I started work, I was telling myself to be more reserved and poised at work. It not so nice to seem so crazy and immature when I'm now a working adult. Seemed that that dint turn out like i expected either. It totally doesnt help that the rest of the team is around my age and it makes it easier to go crazy.

I suddenly realized that i forgotten to blog about Christmas. Oh well... I'll feel that its way to late to be doing that now.

*long post with lots of swear words. read at your own risk. dont say i dint warn you*

Easy. If you had a maternal extended family just like mine - an utter pain in the arse attending any sort of invitation from birthday parties to festive house visit. The only reason why I or anyone in the house bothers turning up is because my mom forces us to with the whole speech on the 'respect for the elders' crap. And honestly? Other than my grandma, I really dont really care about the rest of the extended maternal household.

Then it really doesnt help that CNY is round the corner, everyone knows that i HATE CNY just for the fact that my maternal extended family are well and alive. (*note that my extended family = my grandma's sisters and their families. My mom's sibling and their family are fine). When i mean HATE i mean HATE with eye rolling, blood vomiting avengence .

The only person who ever comes out happy and still cheerful from such 'gatherings' is my mom. They rest of us (even my dad) can only stand 1 hour at most until we start coming up with plans to go home or even better - skip the next arranged event.

Today my biggest Grandaunt was celebrating her 80th birthday and she actually booked the banquet hall of some restaurant in Turf City. Its an 80th birthday party of everyone singing karaoke THROUGHOUT the 3 hours i was there. And they sung everything Cantonese to Hokkien to God knows whatever old people crap songs. I assure you they 'asked heaven （问 天) if the moon represents their heart' .

Check out my tweets during the last hour


I was feeling ok other than rolling my eyes at the rest of the family trying to bring the very shacked Turf city building down with old fashioned singing, my granduncles trying to be funny, stupid questions about where i worked (again) and other typical irritating things. Then they started taking photos and I was damn fucking pissed at everyone trying to make me pose and smile with the so called 'next generation'. It was from then on I was saying 'FUCK' damn loudly in the stupidly pink banquet hall.

I can only tolerate ONE hour of such things before i go mad.

Please. I only fucking see them once a year during CNY. And when I mean see,  I mean see only. I dont speak to 90% of the people in attendance even though I see them once every year. And honestly, I dont even recognize 30% of the people there today. And there they are trying to take photos of me trying to be friendly to them with a fucking smile. FUCK YOU MAN. I dont even know who these people are and you want me to join in in that stupid 'next generation' photo crap. I dont even care if they dont like me coz its definitely mutual.

Honestly i dont really care if they find me disrespectful. I already attended the bloody event even though I dint want to with every fibre of my being. Just me going there to show face is me giving you face and respect as an elder.

All i want to do is to sit there at my little corner. Even my bro dint want anything to do with them. Much less talk about my sis who dint even bother to turn up. I already mentioned to 3 different aunties that i dint want to take the damn FUCKED UP PHOTO and they still forced me and my bro over.

These are the people I dont even want to invite to my wedding

I have officially made a resolution, I will only turn up for events with such relative of mine

• once a year during CNY and I will only pick one of their houses to go to. My brother and i have already planned to skipped all possible second day CNY events. My bro is lucky to own a bike just so that he can escape anytime. I'm just going to have to take a bus home.
• if my grandma invites them to her birthday party or her house which i will attend coz i love my grandma.

 Ok... so what reason should I give this year for not going to second day?

Everyone* who doesn't service their CPF university education loan thinks once you start working you can easily pay off that $18,000+++ loan you racked up at university over that 3 years you spent playing and lazing your time around. Everyone* thinks all you need to do it to bloody transfer money from your CPF to your parent's (or whoever you took the loan from). Well... Everyone is very and greatly wrong.

CPF education loan needs hard CASH top-up. It says there right on the CPF website. There is no way you can happily fill a form and move money between CPF accounts. You have to do hard cash top up every month or a greater power will come after you.


Isn't it enough that what you earn barely is enough to save after paying your own CPF, paying your education loan to your parent's CPF, paying your parents their monthly allowances, then counting off your insurances and bills, then your monthly expenses. All you are left with is almost nothing.

The only way to really save money is to no go on holiday, but can you do that?

On some days you think that that amount of money CPF is eating from your account is way too much. How can you save, get married, buy a house or have children? No wonder Singapore's birthrate was report (just yesterday) that it has hit a new low of 1.1something.

Sometimes I dont know what the UK students are going on strike for. They are just paying 3,000 odd pounds, and only increase to about 6,000+ pounds. Dollar for dollar, that is what we are paying for tuition fees. Plus they get 10 years for repayment.

The story about a boy and his own pair of red-bone hounds. There are apparently two versions, a 2003 and a 1970something. It is even in book. The old book versions looked like your old Nancy Drew or Hardy Boys covers.

Damage done = 1 piece of tissue

next on the list = my dog skip

Have been wanting to read 'Marley and Me'. Dont know if they have it in the library

If you were sleeping between a beautiful girl and a gay man, who's side would you turn your back to?

I was looking through yesterdays New Paper where they had a section that introduced 'Hot 30 under 30'. I was flipping through the article when I saw this:

it reads

Natalie Morris, 27, Youth Leader

That face looked so familiar and I realized where I have seen her before. When I was still in RGPS, she was the head counselor and she is one person I still vividly remembered in my mind. Never remembered her last name but always knew her as 'Natalie'. Her face never changed much.

I remembered looking up to her for the fact that she spoke very well. Plus all the extras she has done in office while I was in school. Good to see that she is doing very well now.

Just spent Sunday morning brawling my eyes out. Funny how dog shows like these always made me so weepy. Its the same for  '10 promises to my dog' and 'Marley and Me'.

Damage done = 6 pieces of tissue paper

googled on other sad dog shows and apparently there are still a few i havent watch. shall try to get them and spend another morning brawling my eyes out.

So there are still

• Where the red fern grows
• Old Yeller
• The fox and the hound
• Greyfrair's bobby
• My dog skip

My New Years Eve ended with me going to bed at 10pm. No countdown, no fireworks, no shaking an utter stranger's hand and hugging the random next to you in cheer. I think I'll rather go to bed early than to squeeze in the train home or drive on the way back.

My siblings dint bother coming home, my parents went out for fireworks, me sleeping at home. Dint watch countdown on TV, just slept at 10 all the way till 7 this morning. Everyone else in the house is more happening than me on new years eve. Even my maid went out.

Anyway. Merry New Year to you all.