Purely Lauren

I have a problem. I frequently tell people to turn left when I really mean right or to turn right when I really mean left. Which I did not 30 seconds ago.

"Where the hell does _____ ______ sit?"
"Down that aisle, he's on your right."


Then I realized ____ ____ sits on the left but the person had already marched down the aisle and I didn't feel like yelling above the cubicles to tell him I was wrong. Besides, he's our White House liaison so he's kind of a big deal and I'm feeling a little sheepish that I don't know the difference between my right and left.

Also, why do people think just because I'm young that it's all of a sudden ok to swear? Not that I really care, it's just sounds weird coming out of the mouth of a professional. And really, is hell really the best word to use in the situation? Wouldn't a, "Hey, where does ___ ___ sit?" still get the point across? Do you think that by using hell I'll be able to tell you faster where someone sits? Or maybe by using hell I can beam you over to his exact location? This phrase has also been used in conjunction to find my boss. "Where the hell is ___ today?" I want to tell Mr. White House liaison that he's probably cool without the swearing, but that's just awkward. The only thing that could be more awkward is yelling above the cubicals stuttering that  ___ ___ is on the left not the right!

I think it has been established that I like to bake. Like a lot.

So when it came to my attention that my roommate was throwing a birthday party for her sister at our house I decided I would volunteer myself to be the cake baker.

My inspiration came from these two cakes:


Meaning, I baked the cake on the left and then did whipped cream and strawberries like the one on the right.

It was delicious. Lots of people liked it. Many told me how good it was. I was feeling like a really awesome cake maker. (You know, thinking stupid things like, "I should always make cakes." "I wonder if I could open a bakery." "I hope everyone here wants me to make a cake for their birthday.") Until I walked into the living room and talked to some new guy who I--

a) had not met, and
b) didn't know his name, but he has a stupid name, think Mormon church history type name*, and
c) have since decided we probably won't be friends, which I told him so later...

--told me that the cake was dry*.

Who tells someone they don't know that their food was bad??

Someone with no tact*. That's who.

And the worst thing is, he was right.

There were some inherent problems with the cake. The fact that I baked it the day before and left it in the fridge for almost 24 hours before releasing it from it's cling wrap binding; or that I  didn't give it enough time to warm up to room temperature before serving; or the fact that the whipped cream didn't get a chance to seep into the cake and soften it up a little either, all contribute to the problem.

But give me a break! I had a really busy day!

(I was also humbled at my softball game on Saturday, did I tell you I'm on a softball team? I'm on a softball team. But I was humbled at the game when I showed up to play, feeling really awesome because I had had a really good practice the week before and had been told that I had gotten, like, 110% better, which is saying a lot really because I'm not that good, but I think I could be good, but this is my first time ever playing so cut me some slack ok? But at my game Saturday I stunk it up so bad (try striking out more than once) that I was actually subbed out for more than one inning, try half the game. And you know who subbed me out? My roommate's boyfriend. Yup, that hurt. And I had thought the league was all about having fun! Guess I was wrong there...)

So since this was a really long story I'll give you the quick summary of what I learned this weekend:

1. I'm not that great of a baker.
2. I'm an even worse softball player.
3. Guys with church history names* aren't that nice* and probably won't be your new best friend.
4. Strawberries purchased at Trader Joes are DELICIOUS.
5. Even if one person says your cake is bad it's ok because this cake was gone in record time. So, it must have been really good.

*deal-breakers.

picture are from Martha Stewart and I am Baker

Not sure if Blogger is going to repost some of the posts they deleted in order to get their sit back up and running. And I want this post here. SO, I'm posting again. Originally posted Wednesday May 11, 2011. And then because I'm high maintenance I totally went through this post and edited and added new stuff. So essentially this is a new, old post. With a lovely post script at the end.

I feel like I've been generally cranky for the last two weeks, maybe three weeks, with spurts of excitement here and there. I'm not UNhappy, I'm just sort of cranky, more like irritable if you will.

So, this morning when I was feeling especially tired and irritable and trying to overcome it by showing coworkers the rather large and greenish looking bruise on my leg (from a softball I didn't catch, and the bruise is the size of my fist). Then I regaled the situation during that same softball game where I was hit in the head with the ball when the pitcher pitched and I was still looking down at the plate, describing to her the slow pitch softball strike zone.

Then, later today, I was lamenting the fact that the bathing suit I bought online a few weeks ago, that was too big (hooray it was too big! but you know, it was still disappointing that it didn't fit), and the worst part is, when I went to exchange the too big suit for the next size down, the next size down was sold out! I was actually really upset. Probably send an email to various friends with a dramatic subject line that said, "WORST NEWS EVAAAAAAAARRRR!!!"

TANGENT: I was just as upset, maybe even more, the time I spent all day in Venice searching for the boot store I had seen the previous day but was closed, and then not being able to find it again. But THEN miraculously FINDING the store and the boots, the gorgeous, perfect boots, that I knew would be mine, and being so happy that I would take the gorgeous, perfect, Italian boots home. And those boots. Those gorgeous, perfect, Italian, leather boots, wouldn't fit over my ample, muscular calves. And it was a really tragic day indeed. One of those days that I hurt, deep down in the pit of my stomach. And it was that day when I knew I'd probably never really be able to wear really great boots...

Anyway, back to my bathing suit story. And yes, I realize that perhaps the modern term these days is actually swimsuit. But you know what? I'm still calling them bathing suits.

So, I decide to check out the delightful website* of said bathing suit to see if maybe, just MAYBE the suit is in, you know, just in case.

And you know what?

It was. The suit was there!

Suit purchased.

Lauren happier and a lot excited-er.

And that my friends is when I knew, God was looking out for me on my cranky cranky day.

*the name of the delightful website will not be named as to not divulge the price of the suit to my mother, father, or maybe Liz, all of whom worry about my money spending habits.

P.S. The next day I went online to send a picture of the suit to my friend and noticed it was sold out again! I'm SO glad it was in on that day. Great thing to happen to me.

I'm feeling frustrated with my life today, mostly my career, and feeling like I'm stuck in some kind of strange mid 20's adolescence. I have no idea what I want to realistically do.

BUT, unrealistically I'd love to live in Europe and visit cute shops and cafes and museums to my heart's content.

oh happy day

Dear Life...

In Her Shoes Blog via google images

 I thought about searching for lots more but decided I should stop and stop procrastinating and work. I'll just dream about Europe this summer, and work of course.

Here we have Katie, in her sleek and sequenced evening wear. The well placed hip pleats and poufs only enhance her shapely curves while the sequenced bodice is not only modest but subtly flirty. Miss Katie enjoys playing volleyball (watch out for her spike!), art projects and teaching children how to read and enjoy history. She’s definitely one to snag!

Miss Lisa here always keeps it sassy with her well placed tulle headband. Her fashion sense is never off, pairing a bright patterned top and sleek black bottom, makes it an ideal dress for evenings out or a day at the office. Lisa saves the world from HIV/AIDS  through her melodic karaoke voice. But back off guys! Rumor has it, she’s taken!

Business casual best describes this summer dress with its cheery colors and coordinating necklace. The perfect dress to wear to an evening at the park or to church the next day. Miss Lauren's excellently coiffed side bun only adds to the overall ambiance. And don’t let that stern face fool you! She enjoys cooking, reading and spending time with friends.

Miss Deborah represents our fun and flirty evening wear, the forest green sleeve puffs coordinate spectacularly with the beaded and sequenced bodice. The height of her bangs creates a lovely, enviable silhouette. Debbie packs a mean tennis serve and cooks up a delicious Egg in a Basket. Better snag her fast guys! She won’t be single for long!

The jewel of our show, Miss Holly elegantly transforms this ivory dress turning it into a spectacular spectacle of the 80’s at their finest. Her manicured bangs and French braid pull the look together in a perfectly simple yet gorgeous manner. The beading on the bodice pairs excellently with the hemline, and the angle of the shoulders. Holly enjoys rock climbing, brisk walks and drawn out cinematic romances, she’s looking for her real life Darcy.

*Clarification on the evening:

• done for a Thrift Store dance held by our ward
• the dance was awkward, the music was good, and we were by far the best dressed
• dresses, with the exception of Katie's (DI), were purchased at Unique
• hair done by Lisa
• make up partially done by me
• jewelry courtesy of Lisa's grandmother

unfortunately we only got a group picture at the end of the night and Holly didn't come home with us, but still. we're looking pretty good...