"Making Memories"

Time goes so quickly I can't believe it's been a year, Dad! You're probably collecting something there even more sparkly than anything you could find in Idaho. Hope you can see us and know we are thinking about you today. Missing you a lot and don't forget to take time to smell your flowers. Hope you like them! Now send us a rainbow or something! I love you! Kipp

Just thinking of you today Dad, on the anniversary of your "graduation" day. Hope you are well and happy. Here are some pictures of your flowers...They are beautiful! Love you!

I posted the following blog on my family blog back in February, and I feel so strongly about it that I wanted to post it on Dad's blog so that we might all continue to remember his angelic influence in our lives...as we approach the 1 year anniversary of his passing.

The beginning of October 2008, I heard a talk from Elder Jeffrey R. Holland that really impressed me at the time. He spoke of how God knew the challenges we would face and how lonely and troubled we would sometimes feel while in this mortal life. He then mentioned that "from the beginning down through the dispensations, God has used angels as His emissaries in conveying love and concern for His children...usually such beings are not seen. Sometimes they are. But seen or unseen they are always near. Sometimes their assignments are very grand and have significance for the whole world. Sometimes the messages are more private. Occasionally the angelic purpose is to warn. But most often it is to comfort, to provide some form of merciful attention, guidance in difficult times."

He also shared a story about his friend Clyn D. Barrus.

Referring to his childhood on a large Idaho farm, Brother Barrus spoke of his nightly assignment to round up the cows at milking time. Because the cows pastured in a field bordered by the occasionally treacherous Teton River, the strict rule in the Barrus household was that during the spring flood season the children were never to go after any cows who ventured across the river. They were always to return home and seek mature help. One Saturday just after his seventh birthday, Brother Barrus's parents promised the family a night at the movies if the chores were done on time. But when young Clyn arrived at the pasture, the cows he sought had crossed the river, even though it was running at high flood stage. Knowing his rare night at the movies was in jeopardy, he decided to go after the cows himself, even though he had been warned many times never to do so. As the seven-year-old urged his old horse, Banner, down into the cold, swift stream, the horse's head barely cleared the water. An adult sitting on the horse would have been safe, but at Brother Barrus's tender age, the current completely covered him except when the horse lunged forward several times, bringing Clyn's head above water just enough to gasp for air. Here he turns to Brother Barrus's own words. "When Banner finally climbed the other bank, I realized that my life had been in grave danger and that I had done a terrible thing--I had knowingly disobeyed my father. I felt that I could redeem myself only by bringing the cows home safely. Maybe then my father would forgive me. But it was already dusk, and I didn't know for sure where I was. Despair overwhelmed me. I was wet and cold, lost and afraid. I climbed down from old Banner, fell to the ground by his feet, and began to cry. Between thick sobs, I tried to offer a prayer, repeating over and over to my Father in Heaven, 'I'm sorry. Forgive me! I'm sorry. Forgive me!' I prayed for a long time. When I finally looked up, I saw through my tears a figure dressed in white walking toward me. In the dark, I felt certain it must be an angel sent in answer to my prayers. I did not move or make a sound as the figure approached, so overwhelmed was I by what I saw. Would the Lord really send an angel to me, who had been so disobedient? Then a familiar voice said, 'Son, I've been looking for you.' In the darkness I recognized the voice of my father and ran to his outstretched arms. He held me tightly, then said gently, 'I was worried. I'm glad I found you.' I tried to tell him how sorry I was, but only disjointed words came out of my trembling lips--'Thank you...darkness...afraid...river...alone.' later that night I learned that when I had not returned from the pasture, my father had come looking for me. When neither I nor the cows were to be found, he knew I had crossed the river and was in danger. Because it was dark and time was of the essence, he removed his clothes down to his long white thermal underwear, tied his shoes around his neck, and swam a treacherous river to rescue a wayward son."

After listening to this talk, I felt a great love for my son Carter who was turning seven. I thought of the responsibility of a seven year old riding a horse to gather in the cattle. I felt grateful for the angels in our lives that watch out for and protect us. I also felt the great love between the father and the son as they embraced knowing prayers and faith were answered by God.

Exactly one week and a day after being impressed by this talk, I got a phone call that my dad had passed away due to a major heartattack. Today it has been four months to the day that I received this phone call. I have done a lot of thinking and listening in the past months.

The last time I saw my dad was August 11, 2008, which marked the 3 year anniversary of the death of Matt's brother Mason, my brother-in-law, killed in a head-on collision going to work. I don't think there is any meaning behind the date, just coincidence I suppose. But it has made me think a lot more about Mason. Also, January 9th, 2009, my sister-in-law's sister was in a car accident with all of her family. Two drunk young men ran into them and killed their two little boys ages 6 and 11 and caused serious damage to her and her husband's health. They had already lost their middle son due to premature labor, many years ago. All three of their children have been taken home to our God. So, this has also caused me to think about mortal life here on earth.

I watched Narnia - Prince Caspian, which really has nothing to do with this conversation at all, other than the song at the end which really caught my attention. I searched it out and have listened to the words over and over again. They have great meaning to me now.

I think about Elder Holland's talk about angels and how they are among us. I have reflected at the timing of his talk one week prior to my dad's death. This talk has helped me realize that my Dad, Mason and these boys are more alive than they ever have been. They see things more clearly than ever before and they are near us whenever we need them and probably more. The words to "The Call" help me realize that they are there when we call them. I have found much comfort in these thoughts and it helps me seek out quiet opportunities to listen and try to feel them near.

When things are hard and I start to feel despair in the tragedies that have happened in their lives, effecting each of our lives, I remember Elder Holland's following words and seek comfort in them. Elder Holland says, "I ask everyone within the sound of my voice to take heart, be filled with faith, and remember the Lord has said He 'would fight our battles, our children's battles, and the battles of our children's children.' And what do we do to merit such a defense? We are to 'search diligently, pray always, and be believing. Then all things shall work together for our good, if we walk uprightly and remember the covenant wherewith we have covenanted.' The latter days are not a time to fear and tremble. They are a time to be believing and remember our covenants."

I am so grateful for the gospel of Jesus Christ that gives me Hope. The ray of sunlight peeking through the darkness is the hope of Jesus Christ that I seek after, because nothing else can lift me up out of the darkness.

I just realized that the phone call I received of my dad's passing was like this song "The Call" there really is "no need to say goodbye." We will see them again. "See you Soon." Those are the words I last said to my dad as his casket closed. (Matt looked at me and asked why I said that...he has been freaked out ever since.)

I like the words to the Hymn "God Be With You 'Til We Meet Again." Those words ring truth to me.

Love you Dad! Thanks for all the good memories.

Alice

I recently had a chance to go on a trip down the Colorado River in the Grand Canyon. The trip was for ten days and covered over 225 miles of river from Lee's Ferry to Diamond Creek on the Hualapai Reservation. It was my second trip to go with the Hualapai Cultural Department down the river. I knew the Cultural Department was having a hard time filling the spots they had for the trip. I kept letting them know that I could find somebody to fill one of the seats so it wouldn't be wasted and I could definitely use the help with performing my job with them which was to shoot a documentary of the trip. I started inviting family members and close friends to see who might be available to go with me if I got the go ahead from the tribe at the last minute.

Oh, how I hated the way that Dad was always naming everything! Matt reminded me the other day about SMAK Corner, and I had honestly forgot all about it. The memory brought a smile to my face because it annoyed me every time Dad brought it up.

The first time I went to hunting camp was when I returned home from my mission. Matt was in Idaho waiting for me and after we had spent a week in Twin Falls, we went to the hunting camp to see Dad. It was a busy time of year for him with hunts, so he wasn't able to come meet me at the airport. I know he was disappointed. Anyway, when we all got to the camp, Matt and I were engaged...I know it was a short engagement, so keep your comments to yourselves! :) Dad had gone off with hunters riding horses and doing whatever they did up there. Matt and I took a little walk and the next thing you know Dad and the men and horses come around a corner on the trail. He decided to name that corner "SMAK Corner" which stood for "Saw Matt and Alice Kissing." Yeah, lame! I thought so too! But, that was Dad...always naming things so that he would never forget, and likewise...us never forgetting either! :) I am sure that every time he crossed that corner he thought about that and told whomever he was with.

Glad I could bring a smile to your face and a laugh to your belly! :) I am grateful I married Matt because he has a good memory to help me remember these silly stories! :)

I was in northern Michigan a few weeks ago and the lilacs were everywhere covering the countryside. They were all in bloom in purple, lavender and white. So beautiful. I remember thinking Dad would have loved it. Then I realized if I look around, Dad's around us everywhere we look. In our memories and our hearts. In the beauty all around us. 

I was thinking a lot about Dad on Father's Day. I remembered how much he liked to go hunting and how different we are. I never liked how he had this need to hunt. I always felt sorry for the animals. However Dad had a love for them too. I liked to go with him to ride horses. That was the good part. I used to hope we couldn't find what he was looking for but instead could just keep riding our horses. It was so much fun. So wonderful to be in the mountains and close to nature. I'll never forget the day we were "hunting" and Dad found a little tiny baby deer laying hidden in the bushes. It was so little even for me being a little kid at the time. Dad picked it up gently and gave it to me to hold. Then he took my picture with it. That is one of my favorite memories. I remember thinking he was a good man too. We put it back safely where we found it so it's mother could find it after we were gone. I was so excited. Dad then proceeded to tell me he had to hunt bears so they wouldn't eat that little baby deer! Nice try in justifying your hunting Dad! :)

Thinking about you today Dad, and wanted to wish you a Happy Father's Day. Miss you and love you. Time keeps ticking and someday we will see you again.

April Fools day was always a great day for your Dad. He loved to fool people. He always loved it when you kids would call Grandpa Ward and tell him that his cows where out and on the highway. Than Dad would drive up here looking for the cows. When he would get here, he would wonder were the cows were at. We would all say April Fools and he would laugh. It's funny how it worked every year...

A few weeks ago I got at call to help with Friends of Scouting. I said sure, I would give them a check. The scouts were at my door in about 30 minutes to pick up the check. The next Sunday in Sacrament meeting the Bishop stood and thank all who had donated to Friends of Scouting, but said they still needed more money. I heard Bob whisper in my ear and said "G'Lenn please write another check for me". So I did because I know how much scouting meant to him. He would always help the scouts collect the money they needed each year. He knew who to call and how much they would donate. He loved doing this. Bob, I will remember each year to pay a little more for you....

Bob never received his eagle award as a young man but he loved helping others receive their eagle. Scouting is a very important part of our family. Kipp and Travis both received their eagle awards. We loved to camp with the scouts. This is how we had many camping trips in the summer. Thanks for the memories...

Philippians 1:3 "I thank my God upon every remembrance of you."

Today, eternity seems too far away...

This morning while I was outside, Miss Lizzy looked at me and wanted to go for a walk on the canal bank. So I told her lets go and of course Durfee and Popeye went to. The sun was out, but there was a crisp wind blowing. The dogs took off and run up and down both sides of the canal making tracks in the snow. Miss Lizzy was slower than normal. She hasn't been feeling very well. The last couple of nights I could tell she was in pain because she was restless. I even heard her moan a couple times. I knew it was time for her to go home. So this afternoon I took her to the vets. I know she is now with Bob and they are playing together.

Miss Lizzy was an "Ericsson's Herd Dog" (if you get a minute look this breed up on the internet). She was a well bread dog and was well trained to herd sheep. She worked hard as a young dog. Miss Lizzy was given to Bob on May 22, 2002 from Wendy Paris. They have a big sheep ranch in Nevada. Wendy wanted Bob to have her because she knew Miss Lizzy would be well taken care of and get to be around a few sheep. It was time for her to retire from the big herd and long hours of work. Miss Lizzy went with Bob and helped with the sheep up in Fairfield. She loved herding sheep and being in the mountains. She was around 14 years old. (What's that about 98 in dog years) She lived a long dog life and worked hard. We love you Miss Lizzy. Now it is time for you to rest in peace and be with Bob.

Today I have been thinking about all the wonderful times we had together. You never forgot to bring me flowers on this day. They were always red or yellow roses. I remember how beautiful they were. I know the last few years you worked at Fox Floral delivering flowers for Valentine's Day. I know you must have enjoyed seeing people smile as they received their flowers. So I want to wish you a Happy Valentine's Day and thanks for making me smile. XOXOXO

We all made a wish for Papa Bob.


Drew said "We gonna show Papa Bob how to eat these!" And we did!

Once in a while, when we were young, we would have a "Movie Night" on Friday nights. We would go to the Wild West Video store on Blue Lakes Blvd. and rent a VCR with lots of movies. We would spend the weekend watching and rewatching movies. We would all sleep downstairs in our sleeping bags and stay up late watching movies. Then Saturday mornings would come and we would wake up early to watch cartoons. While we were watching, we would hear dad come in the door with the sound of crinkling paper bags. We would jump up from the floor and run upstairs, because we knew exactly what "that" noise was coming from. White bags with a great big yellow "M" on them. McDonald's pancake breakfast. Sometimes it would even be egg mcmuffins. Boy, what a real treat!

This morning Kipp and I went to McDonalds in San Francisco and ate a Pancake Breakfast together. It was great fun. On the glass of orange juice I read the words, "Making a better world, one kid at a time." I liked that because I thought of all the times Dad would take us to McDonalds or bring it home for us to eat. I definately don't think it was the food making the world better, but I know it was dad making a better world with each of us kids. We enjoyed our breakfast in a scary part of the neighborhood and it reminded of us of our family trip to Washington, DC. When we went in to a McDonalds and as we were about to order, Dad said, "We are the only white people in this place and we need to get out of here!" I remember Kipp and I thinking that Dad was so racist! Now that I am a parent, I can see that he was only looking to protect his family, he is not racist. It always makes a good story and brings a laugh.

Tonight, after returning home to New Mexico, Matt and I took our kids to McDonald's for dinner. We let them "get whatever they wanted" like Dad would always say. They each ate a Happy Meal and were so excited to get a prize. We sang Happy Birthday to Papa Bob on the way home.

It was fun spending the day thinking of dad and his life. I hope that I don't have to eat at McDonald's very often...Dad has given me a lifetime's worth, but it was fun to go there just special for him.

Love ya Dad and Happy Birthday!

Happy Birthday Bob!! As I sat this morning wishing I could call you up and sing Happy Birthday to you, as we have done many times before, I decided to call out loud to you anyway. As I finished I heard your laugh like the one I have with your voice on my phone! I have saved two messages of yours and want you to know that I listen to them often. I find it easier to acknowledge you when I need to talk to you!! Thanks for all the Great memories you have left me!! I Love You!!

Your Eternal Brother Kent

Another milestone in our grieving process. It isn't easy but it makes me think that I really will be ok. We went to McDonalds today for lunch with Memaw. We all ordered a quarterpounder with cheese cause we figured that is one of the things Dad liked to eat there. Then we had an oreo mcflurry. It wasn't too bad! Now for Dad's birthday dinner we are going to Gerties. I am so excited! Memaw and I took flowers to Dad's grave and a birthday balloon that Riley picked out! We sang him "Happy Birthday", or should I say that we attempted! Let's just say it slowly faded into some kind of crying song, not to sure of the exact name of that song! Anyways, Dad I hope you got to enjoy some of your favorite things today. Love ya & miss ya!!

Yesterday Chloe had a field trip to a Chinese Restaurant where they had chinese food and watched dragon dancers. Matt was able to watch Mason and Josie so we could go. We decided to take Matt's truck. When we got in the truck and started it up the song "Old Time Rock and Roll" came blasting on. I instantly thought of Dad and how he loved to see his girls drive standard trucks. I knew that this was one of his favorite songs to, so I started to sing along and dance while driving with Chloe. She quickly picked up on the lyrics and joined in. We felt happy knowing dad and Papa Bob was nearby singing and dancing with us. :)

Another one of dad's hunts bites the dust.  He hunted enough for all of us for sure!!

Bob always wore wrangler jeans. One time when we were on a trip. We stopped to see the Horning Family in Ohio. (Kris had served his mission in Twin Falls and spent some time in our home.) When we got there Kris's mom looked at Bob and said "you have a wrangler butt". Bob turned red and was embarrassed. Then we all had a laugh about the comment. She said well you can tell because Bob had been in the saddle alot?

Dad always told us how much he loved Grandma and Grandpa Baker, some of his heros.

Dad loved to find any excuse he could to go spend time in the mountains.  Were the hot dogs any good Margie?  This must have been before dad stopped wanting to rough it.  I remember the older we got and he got, the more stuff we would have to bring camping and the longer it would take to set up camp.  I miss the times when we would just throw out a foam pad and lay under the stars and listen to some hunting story for the fifteenth time with a new little twist.  I could use one of those stories right now to tell the kids for bedtime.  I just remembered, we have those stories that he wrote a few months back about a lot of those bear stories and other fun hunting stories.  Yeah!  I've got new material for Spencer and Little Bob (Drew) now!!

Two of my heros are in this picture, (not myself either!), Dad and Grandpa Ward.  I'm glad they're buddies again.  They were there to give me many of my 'firsts' in this life, picking rocks to throwing a baseball!

I'm not sure how many times we watched that film.  I think it was one of dad's favorites.  Every time we would ride down a steeper bank, even a sort of non-steep bank we would lean way back and pretend that we were the ones riding after the wild mustangs.  I think that joke is still alive and well.  I know if I could get on a mule or horse right now and go down a steep hill or mountain, I'd pull the trick, but I'd probably a bit behind dad, because he always was in the lead, and I didn't want to get out of line!  I wish I could go on one more mule/horse ride with him.  Just one more, that's all I ask, I'd be willing to give up all my Christmas presents for the rest of my life in exchange for it, and a lot more things as well.  But, I'm sure we all would, in fact, I know we all would.  He would for us…

Remember the good old days when your birthday cakes were as big as your hairdo?  Those were the days!  We had lots of birthday parties with dad and I'm sure we'll continue to have them with him as well.  Just won't always be able to hear his jokes!!

When this song came out a few years ago, Bob told me that every time he heard it he thought about me. So every time I hear it, I think about Bob and the life we had together. I had been trying to find this song on the radio the last few months (since I am not very good at remembering the name of songs). So the other morning as I was talking to Kipp (he had called to wish me a happy birthday) the song came on the radio. I told Kipp to wait a minute while I listened to get the name and who sang it. As I listened tears filled my eyes because I know that Bob was playing it for me and wishing me a happy birthday. Thanks Bob...I love you...and I will always Remember When.

Memory by Kent Hamilton

Another story: I remember wanting a tree house but no one could find time to help me. Then I asked Bob, he took great pride in helping me get the house built. We laid the foundation with 4 large poles and then a center pole, then we laid pallets for a floor, then the sides. Bob left that summer we had the bottom floor done. It became a big tree house, 5 stories high, it had a carpet on the bottom floor, and 8 track player , lights, and even a pot belly fire place. I could get 15 kids in that tree at one time. Thanks for the great planning of my brother Bob! I have many special memories in that tree house!! Thanks Bob!!

Memory by Kent Hamilton

One story I have of my brother Bob is when I was in 4-H he was an inspiration to me. He got me started in 4-H in a club out South of town near Rogerson I believe. I bought me a calf a Hereford heifer. She only weighed about 100 pounds. She was so cute! I remember feeding her from the bottle until she was bigger. Bob attended to showing me how to show her, I remember how good he was at fitting and showing! “hold her head high, straighten her feet directly below the hips and shoulders, and STARE at the Judge” he would tell me! He used to play the Judge. Then we would walk around the pasture just talking and walking for hours it seemed, just talking about life! Another story is I remember how Dad, Tom and Bob all were going to the Angus sale in Jerome and they let me go with them, before the sale they had a weight judge contest where they let a steer come in to the sale ring and we got to guess his weight. The one who guessed closest to the actual weight won $50.00. Well I was only about 11 years old and well you guessed it they told me what to write down and Ya Hoo!! I won! Boy was I proud. Nope I didn’t share the money, I know if it happened today I would! Another story is of how Bob had this one particular Angus cow, no matter what she would always charge me!! I told Bob he would say “just ignore her she wont hurt you!” Oh yea right I would say, I tried it but yes she would bump her head on my butt and that was all it took for me!! I was soooo scared of her and I think she knew it! Anyway she was artificially inseminated and while Bob had her and the calf at the fair he came to me and said they were going to have a special show for ABS breeds. He asked me to show the calf. I was so shocked that he would ask me, of course I said yes! Well the calf took first place. I was so proud. I remember sitting in the stall with the trophy, and far away from its mother of course! Smiling at all of the people walking by! Boy was I proud! I still have that trophy by my bed to this day! Dated 1973. Along with its Big Blue Ribbon. Thanks Bob!

Memory by Lori Dayley

Bob brought us corn seed when we moved to Spokane in 1988. We planted it in our garden for YEARS and it was THE BEST corn EVER!! We always think of him when we plant the corn, but it's never the same without his good seeds.
Posted by Lori December 30, 2008

Each year we would get a pinon pine tree for Christmas. Some years Bob would cut one from the mountains and others we would buy one in town. We always loved them because they made the house smell Christmasy. One year we brought one home (that we had bought)and put it up downstairs. We always let them warm up over night before decorating them. So I went downstairs the next morning and the smell wasn't quite like Christmas Tree. It smelled like dog. I looked around (or sniffed) and the only thing that smelled doggy was the tree. Bob and I decided that it was a tree on the corner of the lot and ever dog that went by marked the tree. So I got out a bucket of soapy water and washed off the branches that smelled. Soon the tree was as beautiful as ever.

We all decided to come home for Christmas this year. So this year I wanted a pinon pine tree to put up at our home. Matt and Alice went to town and got one. It was beautiful and the grandkids helped decorate it. I love having a real tree. It was wonderful having Christmas together. We laughed and remembered past years with Bob and how excited he would get. I would catch him shaking his presents trying to guess what was inside. I know he was there watching us open our presents and enjoying his family. Bob thanks for the wonderful memories of Chistmas.

Memory by RaeAnna

So I remember a New Year's Eve with Bob, G'Lenn, Kipp and Alice coming to our dinky little trailer in Rexburg. Matt was a baby, and we decided to get together. Bob decided to bring his gun to shoot off at the stroke of midnight. Here we were in a 10 x 35 foot trailer, living in a trailer court, and Bob whips out his gun and starts shooting it. I remember being scared to death, and he was laughing his head off. After a round or so of the shots... we were banging pans and lids together, and we just started laughing. Little did we know back then that everyone was being idiots and we had shot in the direction of 'nothing' on the hill....but it made for a good memory. All the New Years' haven't been so dramatic, although fireworks all over the place have always added to a fun time. Thanks for always making it a party, Bob & G'Lenn. You guys were the greatest, and still are!! ~~~RaeAnna