Our Little Russian Peanut

*** I wrote this post last week on the way to the orphanage so that's why I say "here" a lot because I was in Moscow.

As a side note, before the meat of this post starts, I miss the little guy. Tonight I had dinner with a good friend, showed her pics and we talked about the trip. I got this pit in my gut and hurt in my heart and I really, for the first time, missed him pretty bad. I've gotten that "awww" feeling over the past week looking at his pictures but this was different - not sure I can explain it too well. Anyhow.... here is lots of rambling for you. Something I excel at. :-) *****


I have made so many mental notes this week. I can’t count the number of times I’ve said to Keith “Remind me to post on my blog about….” And of course, here I am, working through the cobwebs to remember what those things are.

Allergies – If you have allergies, don’t assume they’ll go away in Moscow. Lots of trees and lots of pollen. Bring your meds and take them every day as you would at home.

Smog – If you’re coming to the Moscow region, be prepared to breathe in lots of black smoke. Have you ever been behind one of those beaten up jalopies on the road and grimaced at the black smoke coming out of the back? Get used to it, accept it and move on. J Keith had quite a headache at the end of each day. There doesn’t seem to be A/C in the cars (or at least our car) so in order to get air we had to open the window and breathe in the smoke. It’s really icky.

Jacket – Bring a light jacket if traveling this time of year. Temperatures fluctuate quite a bit in Moscow and someone whose name shall go unmentioned (Keith) didn’t listen to his darling wife’s advice and now wishes he had.

Travel toilet paper – Bring it with you. You just never know when/if you’ll need it and it’s great to have for runny noses.

Umbrella – a must have. One minute it is sunny and the next it can be raining. It can also “look” like rain at any time and you need to be prepared.

Breakfast bars/Granola bars – One thing we have not been able to find in the grocery stores here are granola bars or any kind of “on-the-go” bars. We wish we would have had those for a quick snack/breakfast. We packed bags of nuts which were great and next trip we’re going to get peanut butter crackers as well.

Washclothes – We were given towels in our apartment but no washclothes. Being that we shower in a stream of water the size of a quarter, we wish we would have those to help us get our entire body wet. J

Grocery Stores – The grocery stores here are very similar to those at home. You can find pretty much anything if you know what you’re looking for. Karyn showed us what milk to get – it’s warm, on the shelf and is a blue and white box with a lady dressed in blue. You want the 1.5% milk. The reason it’s warm is because it’s highly pasteurized because a lot of people in the region don’t have fridges. I’m not a milk drinker, but Karyn and Norm say it’s yummy.

Water – When you buy water at the grocery store, make sure it’s not sparkling water. We made that mistake the first day and when I took a swig I had to spit it back out. Nice visual, I know. Some of the big jugs have English on one side and Russian on the other. Worst case, just shake it. Also, remember in restaurants to order still water.

Pastries – They have some gorgeous looking pastries. If you can point, you can order them. Just don’t expect to lose any weight.

Safety – Keith and I were rarely uncomfortable walking around Moscow. We did it primarily during daylight (it gets dark at 10:00 here) or, if it was dark, we were with a group. I did not use a money belt (GASP). I had a small purse that I put across my chest and held onto it while walking. I also had my passport and our registration papers in there. We kept US Money in one of our backpacks deep, deep in the bottom and tucked the zipper pulls in. The best advice – be aware of your surroundings. If someone comes up close behind you, move over. We’ve really been comfortable here, but haven’t once let our guard down.

Registration/Passports – If you’re coming to the Moscow region, you are required to be registered by your apartment/hotel within the first 2 days (or maybe it’s 3). In order to be registered you will need a copy of your passport, visa and immigration paper. Your agency should help you obtain a copy of the immigration paper once you’re in country. We brought visa/passport copies with us. You must have your passport, immigration paper and registration paper with you at all times. The police will randomly check people and their papers. We haven’t run into this but have seen them pull people over to do so.

Driving – If you’re easily motion sick, take something with you. Lots of stopping and going. Lots of weaving and bobbing. You’ve never seen traffic/driving until you’ve been in Moscow – and we live in Atlanta.

What we couldn’t live without – A comfortable pair of walking shoes/sneakers, jeans, an umbrella, a comfortable backpack, bubbles, cheerios, stacking cups, our laptops, sunglasses, my own pillow, cameras (duh), on-the-go snacks.

What we could live without – Lots of things to read (at least for the 1st trip, the days are very full), many pairs of dress pants/dress shirts. We actually packed pretty well!

Clothes – We packed mostly dress clothes for this trip and we wish we would have packed more casual clothes or clothes that could go either way. For example, Keith packed his “dressy” polo shirts which look kinda funny with jeans. If he would have packed middle of the road polos it would have been better. I did the same. I honestly think we could have worn jeans to the orphanage all days but Monday. Keith did wear black jeans.

Adapter/Converters – I bought the best power strip ever. Great investment. It is a powerstrip that already has the round plug to plug into the outlet and then allows us to plug any type of plug (in particular our regular plugs) into the strips. I also brought a round adapter. My hair dryer is a 120/220 hair dryer and I had problems with it. I assume it’s because of something in our apartment – it was weird. I was able to dry my hair – the problem was trying not to set my hair on fire when it randomly sparked. J

Bringing groceries with you – We brought soups, oatmeal/grits, easy mac and cheese, beef jerky, microwavable rice, nuts and granola bars. For drinks, I brought tea, instant coffee packs and a lot of different flavors of crystal light on the go. We didn’t have a microwave in the apartment so I wasn’t able microwave the rice and easy mac and cheese. We used one of the soups and ate oatmeal/grits each morning. That worked out really well, actually. Some other things to bring if you’re going to be good little boys and girls and eat in most nights (unlike us who spent a small fortune at TGIF) would be taco seasoning (you can get chicken at the store and make tacos if you want or you can get a rotisserie chicken and make taco soup!), pasta (although you can buy it at the grocery), instant potatoes, real mac and cheese, etc… You get the picture.

Speaking Russian – I am very disappointed that I didn’t take more time to learn some basic Russian. I knew how to say Thank You and Hello but besides that I was lost. I’ve always felt pretty strongly about going to a foreign country and at least being able to say the polite phrases. I feel pretty silly doing charades in the middle of a restaurant. J If you have the time, learn some more. No, you don’t need it – you have a translator, but how frustrated do you get in the US when someone doesn’t speak English? Also, if you’re adopting a toddler, learn the basic toddler phrases. We’ve had to ask our translator to say a lot for us and it would be nice to be able to say things ourselves. Obviously this is my opinion. That and $2.20 will get you a cup of coffee from Dunkin Doughnuts!

Blog in the car – If you’re in the Moscow region you never know how long it will take you to get places. Once you get home you’ll be tired and ready to chill out! I’m in the car right now on the way to the orphanage, actually. On the first day they said it takes 40 minutes to get there but we haven’t gotten there or home in less than an hour – sometimes 2.

Friends – If you know people that are traveling the same time as you, be sure to hook up with one another. One of the absolute best parts of this trip is having the support of people that have been there, done that or are in the same boat as you. We have laughed a ton, compared stories and learned a lot from someone who lives here (Thanks Ron and Dinia!). It has been an amazing experience and I know that these friendships are what helped make it so wonderful.

Have I rattled on enough?? I hope some of the info I’ve given you has been helpful! I’m sure I’ll think of more and will post more as I think of it! If you have any questions, email me!

Toodles!
Becky

Goodness gracious... jet lag kicked my bootie. Once we got to Russia we were a-ok with regards to jet lag. I'm sure it was the anticipation, nerves and craziness but we were able to just keep on keeping on! It's now Wednesday and this is the first day I've felt normal since coming home. Last night we were in bed at 8:30. Ummmm... it was still light out and I STILL haven't watched the season finale of Grey's Anatomy (and don't you dare tell me about it!).

Being home has been great. We missed our own bed and it was so good to see Alex. It's scary when your 16 year old picks you up from the MARTA station in YOUR car. Keith's mom had a hot meal and clean house waiting for us. It was great! We, of course, watching the millions of video we had - once Friday night, once Saturday during the day and once Saturday night. You would think we'd be sick of it, right??? No way Jose! I actually miss hearing that little belly laugh!

We are still hoping for a quick turn around for court. We're planning on 5 weeks, but know it can be longer or shorter. We have lots and lots to do and buy. We've had to adjust our way of thinking from a 2 year old to an almost 3 year old while also keeping into consideration the language barrier! I'm trying to learn some of the phrases we'll need for our return trip. Thanks to K (our translator) and Carey, I've got a pretty good list!

We have decided to make our pick-up trip one big trip instead of splitting it into 2. Our jet lag coming home sealed the deal and knowing that the Peanut is almost 3, we've decided it's important to visit him more and more before Gotcha Day in order for him to get to know us more. I know it will be so hard for him and he'll be grieving so we want to try to make the transition as easy as possible.

I have a post I typed up while we were in Moscow that I'll finish this week. It is all of the general tips/tricks/packing tips, etc... that Keith and I were able to come up with (we have lots of good thinking/talking time on the way to and from the orphanage!). Before I post that, do y'all have any questions you need answers to? Anything specific to Moscow or the first trip or our experiences meeting our child for the first time? Just let me know and I'll incorporate those answers into my already written post.

This weekend is going to be a busy, busy one! We are going to get the Peanut's room ready! We've already taken the rail off of the crib and turned it into a toddler bed but we've decided to rearrange it a bit differently. I also need to decorate the walls, change the doorknob to a locking knob on the closet (all my scrapbook stuff is in there - we seriously lack closet space in this house), Keith needs to finish the trim on the dormer window and lots of other things. I'm also going to go with my step-mom and update my registry and do some shopping for the little guy. RETAIL THERAPY! Wooohoooo!! At least this time my therapy is for a kid I know!

It was so much fun coming back to work and showing pictures to everyone. I find myself calling him "my kiddo" when in reality he isn't mine yet. I guess in my heart he really is mine, we just need the judge to agree! I'm thankful we have some great photos of both of us with him for court. We are lacking some family photos (some are blurry) but worst case, the judge will have some blurry photos! Hmmm... wonder if I can make a picture out of a piece of video. Anyone know?

A big CONGRATS is in order! Our two Moscow buddies have had their GOTCHA DAYS! Karyn and Norm and Dana and Aaron have picked up their little guys, Ilya and Kaden. We're so very, very happy for these forever families!

Alright - I know you've missed my rambling posts and this definitely constitutes rambling! :-)

Becky
P.S. I'm slowly, but surely, catching up on everyone's blogs! I may not comment on them all but know I'm reading! You guys are the best! :-)

The day started with tears and ended with some misty eyes. When the caregivers brought the Peanut to us this morning he was balling his poor little eyes out. He let me pick him up and bounce him around a little but the only thing that stopped the sadness was…. Cheerios! Honey Nut Cheerios! He was obviously still not feeling well and started out being a bit tired. The psychologist came in and we showed her some video from our past few days and she was very, very pleased.

We left the garden room we started out in because the little guy had a cold and it was freezing in there. The psychologist allowed us to use her office since it was warmer. I put him down before we left the garden room and she asked him if Mama should hold him and he said “da” so I picked him back up and trekked up the stairs. Boy is he heavy.

We pulled out the blanket Keith’s mom made for him. We sat on it yesterday and he knew exactly what it was. He scooted his little butt over onto that blanket and continued with the cheerios. Same as Wednesday – feeding mama, feeding papa and letting us feed him. Keith put the cheerio between his teeth again and the Peanut told him no. He stomped and waved his hands in the air. It was hilarious.

We played with the hammer, bubbles, a ring stacker and a toy that made animal sounds. It was interesting having the psychologist in there because she helped to bring out his real personality. He would talk a bit and nod his head vigorously when talking to her. At one point, he heard his groupa playing in the hall. He told K and the psych that they were being loud and he was going to tell them to be quiet and not to be naughty. He ran to the door, opened it with Keith’s help and went out and told them to be quiet. The caregiver made a mistake of giving him a hard candy. When he came back in with the psych she was holding him and he started to choke on the hard candy. She turned him upside down and wacked him and he was okay. I believe Keith has that on video tape.

Once he came over to me, I asked him to give it to mama and he spit it in my hand. Then he was distracted by the cheerios and forgot all about it. He was very, very interested in the laptop, video camera and camera. Keith showed him how to use the little Sony camera and my boy took pictures of Keith and I. It was so, so funny! The camera is one that doesn’t have a view finder, but instead a big screen. He put it right up to his eye, closed one eye and snapped a picture. He even took a semi self portrait! :-)

The psychologist told me that I need to lie down (and had me demonstrate) when the Peanut gets upset and put him on my chest so that my heart is close to his heart. She said that it is very important for children to have that and our poor little guy never did. She said it’s a good way to bond and to calm him down. So we tried (even though he wasn’t upset) and he snuggled for, oh… 2 and a half seconds. Then he wanted more cheerios. :-) While he was on my lap he fed me cheerios, then handed them to Keith. At one point he even fed Keith a cheerio that he had in his mouth. Such a good little sharer! (And yes, Keith ate it.)

After our little bonding, he sat on Keith’s lap and had some animal crackers (we got in trouble for helping to ruin his lunch!). Our translator told him that we were going to be going very far away to America and we would return with presents for him. She asked him if that was okay and he said “Yes!”. She said “Okay, they will go home and then be back for you” and he said “No, No!”. She then told him “But they have to go home in order to bring you lots of presents like more crackers, cars, toys and also to get your big brother. Is this okay?” And he said “Yes.”

Soon thereafter, it was time for lunch and they wisked him away. We had forgotten to give him his gifts! They brought him back and he could have cared less about the photo album but graciously took it. Keith gave him the blanket his mom made and he took that. We went to give him the stuffed dog we made at Build a Bear and he said “Nyet” and shook his head. Do you see now why I think we’re going to have some difficulties with the dogs?? Oye Veye!

After the orphanage we went to the big baby store in the city center. We bought a few Russian CDs with fairytales, Christmas songs, and songs about animals. We noticed again today that we have a huge hurdle to overcome with language. He understands everything, just doesn’t talk too much.

We stopped by the office and saw S and I. Keith asked S for a timeline for court. Since the Peanut was born in a different city, they have to get his papers from there as well as from the baby home he was in. Also, the MOE needs to write a letter stating he has been on the databank long enough (or something like that) and until the judge receives it, no court date will be give. She said maybe 5 weeks. Not that we’re talking about it, we’re not sure if she meant 5 weeks for them to get the letter or 5 weeks until we get a date. I guess only time will tell! :-)

Tonight we’ll head to dinner with the crew again and then tomorrow we’ll leave our flat at 8:30 am for a 12:55 flight! Next post will be from a very jet lagged person!

Paka!
Becky

Today was a very uneventful day! By uneventful, I mean I have no pictures to post and no Peanut stories.

We left our flat at about 9:50 and headed to one of the Moscow Hospitals for our 8 doctor medical in which, ironically, we only saw 7 doctors. :-) We started with a panel of doctors - there were 4. One checked our heart and lungs, one asked us a few questions (nothing hard - they were so easy I can't even remember what they were!), one checked our skin and the other checked our reflexes.

Funny story about the reflex doctor. She was an older lady who seemed very unhappy to be there. The rest of the drs smiled and laughed a few times. Anyhow, the reflex lady walks up and has the reflex tool about an inch away from my forehead. I had a little panic moment thinking "holy cow! Is she going to hit me in the head with that?" (Keith did too!). She pointed to it and then moved it to the right. I continued looking forward. Apparently, my eyes were supposed to follow. :-) All I kept thinking was "Thank the Lord she didn't wack me with that thing!". Then it comes time for Keith to have his reflexes done. So he's sitting on the bench and she wacks his knee. No movement. I trying to tell him via osmosis "Kick you leg!" but she wacks him again and nothing happens. Well, he's so tall that his feet are touching the floor so she shoves him up against the wall so he dangles a little and finally his legs kick out. PHEW! If we failed the 8 dr medical because of reflexes I would have been very embarrassed.

After the panel of doctors we met separately with a Narcologist, Dermatologist and Pyschologist. It was very easy actually. The psych was a sweet, sweet lady who spoke a decent amount of English. We all liked her very much. We paid our 36,000 rubles and went on our merry way.

K (our translator) took us to Cathedral of Christ the Savior and this time we went inside. Wow, wow, wow. Absolutely gorgeous. K told us the history. The original church was destroyed and I can't remember why. :-) (I'm such a history buff). They ultimately put a swimming pool in it's place. Ultimately in the early 1990's (yes, 1990's, not 1900) they rebuilt the cathedral to be a replica of the original. When you look at it, you would think it had been there for hundreds of years.

She also took us to a little store. You would never know it's there. It's in an old mansion. We bought a few souvenirs and then headed to the digital photo shop. We didn't have to take the Peanut out of the orphanage to make his passport/visa pictures, instead the director gave us one of his photos that we could modify. I could start my own photoshop in Moscow. The guy had a scanner, photo printer and a computer. It cost us 860 roubles (should have been 650 but he printed his passport pics in color by mistake). The man wasn't very nice. We asked to keep the color ones and he charged us for them. He was just going to throw them out, but whatever....

K and V dropped us on New Arbat street near the sub-terrain walkway so we could go to the baby store that was there. We wanted to leave our little guy with diapers after the diaper incident on Wednesday. I'm sure you all are wondering why he isn't potty trained. Well, he is the youngest in the orphanage and everyone else is potty trained. When they got him, he wasn't potty trained and with 27 other children, I'm sure it's hard for them to take the time. It's okay with us though - it give him a chance to be a "baby" with us for a little bit - something he probably hasn't been for a while.

We bought 210 diapers and 6 puzzles which we'll give to the baby home as a donation. We also bought more cheerios - honey nut cheerios to be exact. And yes, my boy can eat ALL of them tomorrow. :-) As a matter of fact he can even have the animal crackers we have left. I'll have to draw the line at the beef jerky.

Tomorrow we'll head to the orphanage at 9 again. K is going to explain the the Peanut that mom and dad have to go home and get his brother and also get the house ready for him to come home. She'll also tell him that we'll be back very soon to get him. She said she'll tell him that a few times throughout our visit so that he understands. We also plan on speaking to the psychologist to make sure she continues to tell him about us. My only regret is that we were unable to get a photo of the 3 of us printed by the time we leave to give to him.

We're excited to get home because we know the quicker we get home, the sooner we get back! :-) We've decided to stay through the 10 day wait on the next trip. After seeing how well the Peanut has warmed up to us each day, we think it's very important to see him for a few days before we take him out of his home.

Well, I'm sorry I have no pictures! We couldn't take pictures inside the church which was a big bummer.

Night!
Becky

P.S. We had dinner in the flat tonight. We stopped and Susan's favorite rotiserrie chicken place and got 1 chicken and 4 doughnuts all for 175 rubles. I made pasta and sauce and we picked at the chicken. The donoughnuts are TO DIE FOR!!!!!!!!! We're glad we found them on our 2nd to last day here. :-)

Ooooo... a sneak peak! Introducing the Peanut's hand! And Papa's of course! :-)

Let start off by saying that I am SO glad I'm not the only blog stalker out there. I stalk and stalk and stalk. From work (shhh...), from my blackberry in traffic and from home. On our blog, we typically get about 200 visits per day. Yesterday there were about 1,020. You mad clickers! :-) Thank you SO much for all of your comments. Last night (it was after midnight here) I read each one as they came in and would cry. Not a cry-cry, but I would get teary eyed, blink, they would fall and onto the next comment. Rewind, repeat. You all make me feel so normal about this detached feeling and that means more then I could ever tell you!

So... onto today and the blog title. 180 degrees. I'm happy to say, my attitude took a 180 degree turn today. I went from detached to smitten. We have the cutest little boy with the most contagious laughter. I mean, seriously contagious.

We got to the baby home at about 10:30 (it took us about an hour and a half to get there). The orphanage director told us the Peanut was about to head out with his groupa to play outside. We waited in the lobby and heard the rumbling of little feet. In a straight line, all of the kids headed to the back door. As soon as they saw us their eyes lit up and our hearts broke. Many said Hi and then a few came running over. The caretaker starting guiding them outside. She handed the Peanut to me (to hold his hand) and another little boy grabbed my other hand saying "Mama, Mama" and something elese I didn't understand. He started pulling at me while I have the Peanut dragging along not making any eye contact. Nice.

I didn't realize until I watched the video, but another little boy ran up to Keith and threw himself around Keith's legs hugging him. Heartbreaking. We made it outside - me with 2 kids and Keith with none. It took a while to get the other boy to go play with his groupa and when he left he cried. Ugh. But back to the good stuff...

The Peanut had my hand tightly but each time I tried to talk to him he would turn his head away from me. He was checking me out of the corner of his eye but no matter where I positioned myself, he would turn away. Frustrating to say the least, but understandable. I asked Keith to get out the "magic potion"... BUBBLES.

Boy, did that work. He and Keith played and played. He watched Keith blow bubbles maybe 2 times and then he wanted to try. After that, he would not part with the wand. He blew them, chased after them and laughed and laughed. I took the bubbles from Keith and we did the same for a while.

We played a little bit with the ball we brought but that didn't hold his attention for long. Then came the fun. I started a little chasing game with him and then I found his tickle spot. Boy oh boy did that get him going. He giggled non-stop. We got to the point where I was at one side of the area we were playing in and he was at the other. I had my arms wide open and he would run to me with his open. We'd "hug" and I'd pick him up, twirl him around and then tickle him until I couldn't hold him anymore. (Note to self: By 15 pound dumbells to build strength)

Then Keith started playing on the slide with him. He would walk him up the slide and then say "One, Two, Three" and the Peanut would slide down, holding Keith's hands. After about 10 minutes (I kid you not), he was sliding on his own AND saying "One, Two, Three" in English. The kids a sponge. Keith and the Peanut started a tickling game and when I tell you that it is KILLING ME to not be able to post the awesome pictures I took, that's a complete understatement. The pictures are so freaking cute. All the more reason to get a quick court date, right???

We ended the day on the slide. Oh, one thing I forgot to mention. The little boy who wanted to play with us earlier that I told you about... he came back over. The Peanut and Keith were playing with the bubbles and this little boy was chattering on. Of course I couldn't understand anything but the Peanut did. The Peanut held onto Keith's pant leg with a death grip. At one point the boy got too close to Keith and our little guy pushed him out of the way and said something like "My Papa!". So, we have a territorial little guy!

As we were walking into the detsky dom (orphanage), the Peanut was holding my hand and Keith's. It was too narrow for all three of us to get through so Keith let go of his hand. The Peanut stopped dead in his track and turned around to wait for Keith. We got to the next doorway and I let go - same reaction. He wasn't going anywhere without either of us.

He does tend to pull away we if try face to face eye contact (if we're holding him he'll bend backwards) or when he initially sees us he'll roll his eyes back in his head or off to the side to avoid looking at us. Completely normal. We're big people - big strangers to him and he can't trust us. I'm sure he wants to, but it will be some time! I hate the idea of leaving without him this week but we love his orphanage and caregivers and we know they'll work with him to help him remember us. The psychologist gave us "homework" last night. We had to answer questions about our home and family. We also had to decorate the questionnaire with drawings and such. They are going to read it to him every night from now until the time we get back to help him adjust and remember us.

It's so important, at his age, that he know that we didn't abandon him and that we are coming back. His trust has been betrayed twice and they know he's sensitive.

So, in summary, it was an awesome day for all of us. Keith was already on cloud nine and now I am. The Peanut is on cloud 2 which is one step up from 1. I'll be happy if he makes it to cloud 9 in the next year or two! :-)

Many hugs!
Becky

P.S. Spell check doesn't work... please don't grade this essay! :-)
P.S.S. DUH. I forgot the MOST important thing! We signed the petition to adopt him today! We have named him but will hold off on sharing until Gotcha Day. Tomorrow we'll be heading to the notary to have our papers notarized so they can be filed in court. Woooohooooo!

Okay, okay, okay! I'm here blog stalkers!

Where do I start??? Someone posted on our blog once (Melissa) to be flexible. You have to be flexible in this journey called adoption - especially this first visit. If you recall, we requested a boy < 24 months of age. We knew last Friday after talking to our agency that there was a chance that we might get a slightly older referral. When I talked to C, I told her that most important thing to us was health. We didn't care if our child was blue, purple, 5 months old or 5 years old.

So.... get to the point right? We left our apartment at 10:00 this morning, headed to S's office. We met with her briefly and then to the Ministry of Education (MOE). Once we arrived at the MOE we found out that they were all in a meeting so we had to wait for 40 minutes before we could head upstairs. We were able to visit with another couple from our agency that had a rough time getting here and was quite exhausted!

Once it was time to go to the MOE, we started up the stairs. Can you believe that no one asked me if I wanted to take the elevator?!?! Let me tell you... after all of that walking yesterday, 4 flights of stairs pretty much sucked. By the last flight I was praying I would not embarass myself and have to ask someone to carry me. We got to the office, went inside and sat with S until the lady from the MOE came in.

We were first. Talk about pressure! She started rattling off the child's history and S translated. He is 33 months old. Dark brown hair and dark brown eyes. S goes to show us his picture and before she does she says "Very bad picture. Very bad. Just go see the boy". When I saw the picture I couldn't help but giggle. The Peanut had this little toothy sneer like my sister always did when she was making her mean face when she was little. :-)

The next couple received their referral, we all agreed to see the kids and headed out. We went to the town of Lubertsy. It is about 40 mins - 1 hour outside of the center of Moscow. Our driver had a hard time finding the orphanage because they had never been there before. Once we got there (on some really bumpy, unpaved roads that warrant a sports bra might I add) we went in and met with the orphanage director.

It was a short meeting because there wasn't much to say about the Peanut. He has no medical problems, his mother had no problems, the father had no problems. Huh? What? Then why is he in an orphanage? As S told us, the Russians don't want the brown hair, brown eyed children or any child with Asian features. They want blond hair, blue eyed kids. We were still very guarded because we had the great Dr. M coming to visit and maybe he would tell us something that everyone else hadn't. We found out that the Peanut was napping and we were told to come back at 2:30 and they would wake him early (nap time ends at 3).

We went back out to wait, Dr. M. arrived and about 30 minutes later we headed back in. They took us upstairs to the psychologist's room. She invited us in and ummm... then she started the Spanish Inquisition. Why did we want to adopt? How did we know we could handle it? What did we expect? What is our house like? Do we have animals? Etc, etc... oh - "Do you make porridge?" I kid you not. To be completely honest, we appreciated the fact that she took such an interest in knowing whether or not we were any good for this little guy. Too often people are handed kids that shouldn't be parents.

Okay, so the whole time we're being questioned, we're waiting for the little Peanut. In he comes and he starts balling. He grabs onto his caregiver and just cries! The poor little guy! Dr. M. gets him to warm up to him and they start playing with all of the fun intstruments. Dr. M. was awesome. He was better than anything I could have ever wished for! The Peanut kept eyeing me (I was taking some video) like "who are you lady and what the heck do you think you're doing!".

After Dr. M. was done we were allowed to get down and play with him. He wasn't such a big fan of ours, but he loved our stacking cups! This kiddo's motor skills were right on target! Not only was he nesting them but he was nesting the balls you could make of the stacking cups. He turned the play hammer on and off and was very inquisitive when one of us would do something different.

His caregiver told us he was very kind, sociable and was good at sharing. He is also very shy. Dr. M told us that he was surprised at how healthy the child is. The only thing he sees is that he is behind in speech. His health is great, his height and weight are great and cognitively he's doing awesome.

The Peanut then went for snack and then came back and played. He interacted with us a bit better but he gave us the evil eye whenever we got to close. We played Hungy, Hungry Hippo (oh yes, we did!! Jealous??) and he won of course! It helped that he raised the hippos mouth with his hands and stuffed the marbles in it, but hey... what are you going to do? We shared animal crackers and he and Keith played patty cake or something like that. At one point he said "Papa!" and turned towards Keith. Talk about a moment that will melt your heart. The social worker told him to share his cracker with mama and he turned and pointed some grubby, sticky, cracker crumb fingers at me. :-) I just handed him another cracker.

When we left he kept turning around to wave goodbye. It was almost as though each time he turned around he was wondering if we'd still be there. The Peanut was brought to the baby home at birth, then went to a foster home (we're not sure at what age) and has been at the orphanage for the past month. The psychologist was worried about the trama from leaving the foster home and I think that is why she spent so much time checking us out. He was very attached to his caregiver which, after one month, is a great sign.

So, there you have it! We'll be headed back tomorrow around 9am. We haven't officially accepted him yet but plan on doing so tomorrow afternoon once we've agreed on a name. :-) He is a cutie. I wish I could post pictures but we have a few months before that can happen.

Thanks, all, for checking in on us! It was a good day, albeit emotional. It's hard when you plan on setting sail on one course and end up going quite off path. Everything happens for a reason and this was a great reason!!

For those of you that have husbands that seem "disengaged" during the waiting process.... have faith. Keith and I did a complete role reversal today. He is so excited and has been such a rock through this! I'm the one that seems to be more unemotional and detached! Maybe I'm just emotioned out?? :-) I think the next few days will get better as he learns to like us a bit more!

Hugs to all of you!
Paka!
Becky

Today turned out to be an absolutely gorgeous day. We had a good nights sleep last night (slept from midnight until about 6:45), got up had oatmeal (Becky) and grits (Keith) for breakfast and decided to venture out. We walked around the city from 8:30 until about 3:30 and then headed back out again at 4:30 to meet the clan for dinner.

For my sister, Mandy... a video of GUM. The big ole' mall at Red Square. Hopefully my video taking skills won't make you motion sick. :-)

For Alex... your dad saw this car and just had to stop and take a picture for you! You boys and your toys (and no - we cannot buy one). :-) We miss you!

We're getting ready to head to dinner with Karyn & Norm, Dana & Aaron and possibly Ron. I will blog more when I get home. Have lots of good pictures to share (Keith and I spent the day walking everywhere (and I mean everywhere).

TTFN!

Becky

We made it to Moscow around 10:30 this morning... not without some fun though!!

We got to the airport, tried to check-in on the self-service kiosks only to realize we wouldn't be able to because we had to have our visas checked. We got in line... a very long line and started to panic a bit. We had about an hour and 45 mins before our flight was supposed to leave. Some lady that works for Delta was pulling people off the BACK of the line to send them to other stations with less of a wait. One time she took 5 sets of people and we were the 6th. We got our tickets and made it to security about an hour prior to departure time, got through security and made it to our gate with 10 minutes to spare. GO US!

So here's where the fun starts. We're on the plane getting all comfy and a man comes on. He was acting rather odd. Had his stuff all over the place and when the girl in the seat next to him came to sit down he had to move his stuff. He was very confused and just started rambling. Keith and I were watching him pretty closely. Okay, I was probably staring.

He started to pull the "pleather" on the seat in front of him out from above the tray table and was trying to stick his fingers up underneath and pull at the cushioning to rip it apart. The girls that were supposed to sit next to him have already gotten their stuff and moved. It comes time to depart and the captain is backing the plane up. Well, this guy won't sit down. He goes up into the section in front of us (his seat was in the row next to ours) and starts talking to someone. The flight attendant keeps telling him to sit down and he rambles on about how he won't and he has to get something out of the overhead bins, but he never does. Now there are three flight attendants trying to get him to sit. They threaten to pull the plane back up to the terminal and he finally sits down.

Keith is freaked, I'm freaked. This guy spoke fluent Russian and perfect English. So I look out the window and see we're pulling back up to the gate. They disarm the doors and a security guy comes on to get the guy off the plane. He starts refusing, then starts crying and won't get his stuff. I was SO impressed with the security guy. About 5- 10 minutes later they finally told the guy if he didn't grab his stuff right now he was going to be arrested. After repeating that about 5 more times he took everything and left but not before conversing loudly about how he's never going to see his father again. I felt so much better that he was gone but my CSI husband decides to share his thoughts with me. "What if it was all a diversion and he left something on the plane". Oh goodness gracious.... wrong thing to say to me. So, we tell the flight attendant that he was pulling apart the seat, they came and looked, had emptied out the luggage on the bottom of the plane and about 15 minutes later we pulled back from the gate again.

Needless to say, we were VERY impressed with how Delta handled the situation. They came on the announcements and said that they had to allow a passenger off due to some medical concerns and it turns out the guy was saying he couldn't sit down because of some nerve disorder or something. It was nuts. The rest of the flight was absolutely fine though! I slept a bit and watched 27 Dresses. Keith didn't sleep a wink and watched The Golden Compasss, The Bucket List and I am Legend.

Once we got to Moscow, our translator "K", met us and we headed to the exchange office to exchange some money, then to the grocery store and because we had a little bit of time before we could check into our apartment, we went to Red Square. It was amazing to see St. Basil's since I've been staring at it on my computer desktop for many months! We took a quick tour, walked through GUM (a huge fancy mall) and then headed to the apartment.

We checked into the apartment and by that time sleep deprivation had hit both of us. We planned on taking a 3 hour nap and then getting up and facing the world. 7 hours later, we woke up! It was about 9:00pm and was bright outside. Apparently the sun doesn't go down until about 10:30, yet it rises around 6:00/6:30! I made some soup (I forgot to bring Peanut butter ARGH!) and Keith had a mystery meat sandwhich. He claims it's balogna. I'm not willing to find out if he's right.

Now here we sit... just like at home with both of us on our laptops. Unfortunately, my laptop charger was left at home so we'll have to share laptops in the next few days. :-)

Tomorrow we're going to go explore and try to get our bearings. We're going to be meeting Karyn & Norm, Dana & Aaron and hopefully Ron for dinner. We're going to My My (pronounced Moo Moo) for dinner. It's a Russian buffet of sorts. Hopefully someone can point out something for me to eat. I'm not a fan of trying new things. The good news is, I will hopefully lose a few pounds on this trip! :-)

Hope all is well with everyone. I'm going to try my hardest to keep up on blogs even if it just means reading them and not commenting until I get home. Time to leave you with some pictures!

Our flight leaves at 3:30! It's 11:15 now, we have to leave for the airport at 12:00 and I have yet to take a shower. Also before leaving I have to get a packet together to go send to my social worker. Who was it that said I work well under pressure? :-)

It's going to be allllll good! Thanks for your happy thoughts and prayers! We are so lucky to have such a wonderful group of friends and family to support us during this journey! :-)

Much love,
Becky

P.S. OF COURSE I'll be blogging from Russia! Don't you worry.

If I have one piece of advice to give you, it is this:

Whoooooo... the check marks are flying in this house!

New money - CHECK (thanks Daddy - you are the best!!)
Long LAN cables and switch - CHECK (way to go IT husband of mine!)
Call credit card companies - CHECK
Make Visa/Passport copies - CHECK
Note to school for Alex telling them we'll be out of town - CHECK
Order int'l cellphone - CHECK
Label pictures in Peanut's photo album - CHECK

Check, check, check!!!

What's left to do???
Pick out shoes
Keith needs to pack
Clean my house
Wash the dogs
Grocery shop for Alex and Grandma
Get car emissions done (whoops - that was supposed to be done in April)

Not too much left!

I want to give a big shout out (I sound like I just called into a radio station, huh?) to all of Keith's customers and friends! He sent an email to his distro list letting everyone know we're heading to Russia and I can't begin to tell you how humbled I was by the responses. So many people that I have never met have been praying for us and thinking about us for the past year. It just makes me speechless. We are so blessed to have the support system we have. For those of you that know and love Keith, don't you worry - there will be GOOD stories about him on here. :-) He's my comic relief! :-)

Night night!
Becky

One week from today

...I will be a nervous wreck getting myself ready in the morning, convincing myself I need to eat even though I’ll feel like I’m going to throw up.

...we’ll meet S from our agency who I feel like I already know!

...we will have to make the big decision of whether or not to get into the world’s smallest elevator at the Ministry of Education (MOE) or walk four flights of stairs.

...we will no longer wonder who the little boy is that is about to steal our hearts.

...we’ll know what orphanage we’re going to.

...we’ll get to meet the fabulous Dr. M that we’ve heard so much about.

...we’ll be hoping and praying that this little boy is relatively healthy so that we can petition to adopt him.

...we’ll no longer have to guess what color hair he may have or the color of his eyes.

...we’ll have to agree on a name and we won’t have to say “Well, let’s see what his Russian name is first”.

...will be one of the hardest, most emotional, most rewarding, most exhausting days of our lives. But I know it will be one we’ll never, ever forget.

So what does happen on our first business day there? I know I often assume that everyone that reads our blog is adopting, but that is far from true. Obviously, since I’ve never done this before I don’t know exactly what happens, but here’s the general idea.

~ Our driver and translator pick us up and take us to the CSS office to meet with S.
~ S talks to us a bit about what to expect at our appt with the MOE.
~ We head to the MOE and they present us with written information about our referral as well as a picture (which, rumor has, is typically very outdated).
~ We agree to meet the child and head to the orphanage.
~ Once at the orphanage, we meet with the orphanage director and/or the orphanage doctor. We ask lots of questions. Dr. M also meets us there.
~ They bring our referral in to meet us and Dr. M does a thorough evaluation.
~ We spend some time with our referral (how much time depends on the orphanage, the child’s schedule and the time of day)
~ We head back to our apartment and upload pictures/video and send medical info to Dr. Johnson at University of MN.
~ We try to sleep while deciding whether or not this is the little boy that is meant to be our son. (Actually, let’s rephrase that. Keith sleeps (snores) while I decide whether or not to kick him constantly and wake him up because it’s not fair that he can sleep when my mind is going six million miles an hour.)

So there you have it!

I’m pretty much packed, with the exception of shoes. That’s always the hard part for me. I was convinced I was bringing 2 pairs – one to wear with dress pants, one to wear when just walking around but I’m not sure I can only bring 2 pairs of shoes. That would be a record for me.

Happy Monday!
Becky

Since you all did so well on the "don't forget to pack...." post I've decided y'all would love to participate in "don't forget to ask the caregivers....."

What questions did you ask at the orphanage on your first trip? Or what questions do you wish you would have asked? If you haven't traveled yet, what's on your list of things to ask?

I know on Trip 2 I need to ask questions about the Peanut's schedule, food, etc... but do I need to ask that on Trip 1? Tomorrow I'll be digging through the cobwebs and pulling out all of the lists I have, but right now, at 1:15 am, group participation sounds good to me! :-)

Today was a nutty day - had a miscommunication with my social worker so we didn't get a chance to meet to finalize the home study update, went to the doctor and got prescriptions for travel meds, bought an awesome backpack to carry all of our photography/camcorder/laptop stuff in and bought a comfy pair of Merrell shoes that will go perfectly with jeans, khakis, black pants, etc...

Tomorrows plan is to meet my sister in the morning and go in search of a few pairs of short people pants. I'm 5'2" and what a pain in the neck it is to find comfortable, non-old lady looking pants that don't need to be hemmed. Worst case scenario, I'm armed with my hem tape for some quick hemming. Tomorrow I'll also be gathering all of the papers we need to bring, photocopying visas, sending off itineraries and all of that good stuff!

In between my homestudy appt and dr appt I had my first "oh my goodness this is really happening" anxiety attack. I was driving along and it just hit me like a freight train. Chest tightened and I had to remind myself to chill out. What's the best way to chill out? A pedicure. I swear I almost fell asleep I was so relaxed!

Alright - this is enough of a random post. I think I'll go to bed now so that I'm not a royal you-know-what tomorrow!

Toodles!
Becky

I need to start this post by saying THANK YOU to my bomb diggity diggity bomb friend, Dave. (I told you I'd call you that, didn't I??) I have been fighting, wrestling and threatening to throw my video camera to the sharks because I haven't been able to figure out how to change a .vbo file into an .mpeg2 to an .avi to a partridge in a pear tree. Dave figured it all out and then some (in a short period of time, not 3 weeks like I worked at it. Don't you hate people like that??? Just kidding of course...)! Such a smart, smart boy he is! :-)

So... I know you've all been dying for this (ha!) but here is my first, exhausting attempt to put together a video. It's of my babies. It's a compilation of video and pictures of all 9 million of them.

Enjoy!



P.S. I'm sure you're totally wondering what how I'm doing on my packing!!! I'm happy to report I've.... done.... nothing. :-) Chris mentioned in the comments that he bets I work best under pressure and he is right! :-) Don't you worry - it will all get done! Thank you ALL for your suggestions and lists and such - they are SO helpful. Have I mentioned that we leave ONE WEEK from TODAY (it's after midnight so technically it's Friday)

Well folks, 2 weeks from today (exactly) Keith and I will meet the Peanut for the very first time! Can you believe it? Nope, me neither. 11 days from today we'll be on a jet plane.

So, I know you’re dying to hear about how our travel plans are coming and how are packing is coming. Let me take a quick second to list everything I’ve done!

1. Nothing

I am totally not kidding. I have a mental block or something. It’s as though I really don’t believe that in 11 days I’ll be boarding a plane to Russia! After 1 year and almost 2 months you think I’d be packed and ready to go. Instead I find myself avoiding anything travel related. This weekend I had a mental list of what needed to be accomplished. Well, I did everything except what was on that list.

1. Had breakfast with my dad and step-mom (Oh yeah! That’s something adoption… my dad is taking on the task of getting our new bills)
2. Got my hair colored (3 different color highlights which looks quite beautiful if I do say so myself – don’t worry, I’m not striped or anything. They are very subtle.)
3. Got my hair cut (long bangs and lots of volume snipped away – the jury is still out mainly because I can’t style it like the lady did)
4. Went shopping with my sister (I love The Loft)
5. Went to the movies with Keith (saw Made of Honor… total chick flick but who can complain about 90 minutes of McDreamy?).

So needless to say I’m in a serious state of denial. It’s not like it’s just Keith and I packing that we need to worry about. I have to figure out Alex’s schedule, get my house in order for Keith’s mom and finish up my homestudy by Friday (oh yeah, that’s not done yet either).

Have I also mentioned that we just kicked off a big project at work and I’m in all day meetings throughout the next two weeks so most of my lunch breaks are shot?!?! Joy oh joy!

So, my plan is this. On Saturday morning, park my car far away from my house (and call Keith and have him drive me back to the house before he and Alex leave for the day). This will ensure that I am stuck at my house because goodness knows I won’t use the energy to actually walk to my car. I’m allergic to exercise – my pants tell me so everyday. :-) I think if I’m stuck in my house I’ll be forced to do laundry, pack, make a list of things I still need to buy, clean my house, etc, etc… Saturday afternoon I’ll take a nap (I’ll be really tired from all of the laundry and cleaning, ya know!). Then Saturday evening I’ll go back to my car and go buy everything on the list that I made Saturday morning. Is that a plan or what?

Seriously though, I need some mojo or something. I really think I just need to gain confidence that this IS going to happen and I need to stop waiting for the other shoe to drop. The only shoe that should be dropping is mine into my suitcase.

So here’s where I ask for your help! If you’ve already traveled on trip 1, what was the one thing you forgot to do or remembered at the last minute? If you haven’t traveled yet but have some good ideas of things I’m libel to forget can you let me know what those are too? For example, I just realized last night that I need to photocopy our Visas for registration purposes. Those kind of “gotcha” things are gonna get me!

Later Taters!
Becky

P.S. I’m light years behind in blog reading. I hope to catch up tonight!