Mr happy

Some reasons why:

#1: She don't want me

#2: She thought I was perfect, but I was just being me. She left the moment she realized I'm not perfect

#3: Her lifestyle. I really don't want to do the things she do. I just want to spend time together.

- I cannot take more nights where I stay up, just to make sure she home safe. that time she drink until puke also never tell me until day later? she just don't give me the reassurance that I shouldn't worry about her? in a sense its kinda selfish? I don't know.

#4: Her whole attitude towards not being sad if you feel you cannot change anything. There is nothing wrong with being sad when I'm sad. Instead of pretending its not there, arbo address the issue?

#5: Even thou she text me alot of things about wanting and missing, but sometimes it feels like i am the one who wants to meet? Like when she was contemplating going clubbing or meeting me? I hated feeling like a side plan.

#6: She didn't understand that certain things bother me. She more bochup than me. Feel like i easily hurt or sensitive. I need someone to be on same page as me? not be suprised when i said i hurt. Like seriously, that night at bishan park, cannot see the things you saying are super hurtful meh?

#7: No matter what she said, what articles she share with me, what promises were made......she still left

Add on

I will not see who sees my igstories. I will just post and forget.
I will not see their igstories also. It just messes with me when I see her so happy. Its fucked up for me to think that, but it does affect me.


I think, I'm done. Keep thinking like the tarot card reading predictions, is abit setting myself up for failure. its easier to just accept the fact that she doesn't care anymore and the whole thing will be forgotten soon. Only left me here, its time for me to say fuckit too.

Don't think anyone cares also, everybody don't think much when its the guy y'know? Everybody will help you if you get hurt, nobody helping me when its me. I mean, got la, the few dependable, got listen to me.

I think, just wish you safe flight, then thats it. I won't bother you anymore.

I'm not going to look at your facebook.
I'm not going to look at your instagram last login and last liked photos.
I'm not going to post stupid movie moments that shows how I feel about this whole thing.

I'm going to try and post more igstories and be back to normal.

I'm going to try and not see who sees my igstories. Don't care.


Later look at your fb, then is posts about how you already dun wan bf, or whatever la. Will be along the lines of how you're better off without me. Same with your ig. Why do I want to do that to myself? Might as well don't see. Maybe can pretend you still give a shit about the whole thing.

Why should I even care what you think about me now?

Mope around? be sad? so that you don't hear that I'm ok? For what?
You're already not around. I don't even know why i should feel bad for appearing to be ok. You already left.

I'm just going to be who I was originally, the person you thought you loved. The person you thought you wanted to spend your life with.

Legit, I was very happy to be with you. Call me negative, call me whatever. You made me want to be a better person and I was willing to do anything for you. Because its you, no one else already. Is you.
At one point, you were telling me that you're negative. I didn't just focus on that, cause I saw the light in you. I told you that. I tore down my walls for you, but you left. I stuck by you, no matter what you told me. I knew I wanted to protect you and be there for you for the rest of my life. I knew.

You're no longer around. To be honest, you weren't really good for me. But i didn't care cause i meant it when i said I love you. I can't stop loving you, just like how you stopped loving me. Sometimes i wish you were still around, sometimes I wish you can talk to me properly and not just stop whatsapping me. It sucks.

I will find things to do, challenges to overcome. But I can never forget you.

I hope you know that. I love you.

I once said in a post that I should post when I have forgotten about all these or when its not affecting me alot.

I haven't really been thinking that much for actually a few weeks now. Sure, sometimes still got ABIT but nothing major, small issue. I sometimes forget about the box. Very often even when I think of her I also dun really care much ler? Reading her blog is damage, better don't. Wake up don't think of her as the first thing ler.

I guess what helped is first now got exam so focus is on studies. Than she past few messages is always asking for help on OT all these. When I see is her msg, always about OT, I find myself almost annoyed when its her msg cause its always asking for something. Somemore to be honest la, she's not my type. Its only because she showed me attention thats why I got tricked. As long as she don't randomly msg me and ask about me, I will be fine.

Even if work together, I just imagine she still attached can ler. Just need to stop with the spontaneous messages otherwise I might get tricked again.

After exams, I fuck care if fail. I don't really care. I will cycle my brains out, workout more intensively, play lego..

I only stopped playing lego and posting about lego during that photo booth thing. Didn't want her to think small of me. Oh well, who cares.

Can't believe this day is here. Time really does heal all the fuckups. Can't wait to play when exams are over.

So I worked without letting you know, than asked you about the person I was working with to see if you can give me some background info. You said bojio all this...wadeva

Than now you just messaged me about whether I working next week. I told you no, than you replied "why....?"

C'mon, stop doing this. I don't need this. I don't need you to talk sweet again. I don't want to see you again. I don't want to work with you again. Its just going to restart this entire cycle once more.

I dunno when exactly you did break with your bf. The way I estimate it, it should have been last year august or so. You tell me he bastard and you should have left long ago, but your blog still say all these. If until now you can't let go, than I dunno how to even try also.

Maybe she so nice because she lonely or wadeva, maybe.

When I want to think how stupid and silly it is, I just imagine what those jobs we did together means to her (which is nothing). But when I think about what it meant to me and how it made me feel, than tio own.

Need to start bluffing people say I dun care liao. Think assignments over.....if no job.....than no messages ler. I see your blog post all this....should I even bother trying to msg you even?

Not going to lie, even if its assignments, if I see your msg, I will still smile.