http://www.gocomics.com/calvinandhobbes/2012/10/23

It's what I'm feeling right now.

Neither hate nor dislike but just feel like there's something missing.

I realize it's just a stupid feeling, a hunch that will pass away soon. So, not gonna give it too much thought.

Going back to KL tomorrow morning. Can't wait for next weekend to come. Hopefully everything will fall into place just as planned.

Love,
me

Back to where I belong.....home

Actually back for 2 days already but just freaking lazy to update this blog and tremendously tired.

Never a big fan of using car to travel back home on festive occasion. The usual choice be either by flight or bus, none required me to be behind the wheel. This time, the lovely parent said they will come pick us up since there will be 4 of us that gonna go back. I already knew at that time who gonna be the DD(designated driver) for such 'auspicious' trip. Dad arrived around 3pm and we started our journey back home by 630-ish. One and half hour to reach sentral to pick up by brother before continued our journey back home.

Guess what time we reach Penang? FREAKING 2AM!!!!!

Me was half dead already at that time. Even though got like 4 drivers inside the car, I be behind the wheel for the whole 8 hours. Surely can't ask my dad to drive since he just drove to KL in the morning, my 1st brother was tired from working, my 2nd brother..........erm, I rather drive myself than let him take over XD In one night, consumed 2 cans of Nescafe and a bottle of Livita. Damn my sugar level shoot high at that time. Got a lil' giddy from all those drinks..hahahaha =P

Back to present. Raya; and this one is the worse between those two. Not only all food has coconut milk, add in it will be just meat for the next 3 days, won't be surprised to see the needle on the scale moved up after this weekend. Only made cheese cracker pudding and bread pudding for this raya. Ah well, no choice XD

Selamat Hari Raya. Don't forget to have ur share of rendang and ketupat coz it gonna be another year before u guys can eat. To those outside Malaysia, don't crave too much!!!! mwahahahahaha xP

Love,
me

Yesterday had turned out worse than I had anticipated...If only I stick to my original plan

Wake up - Brunch at McD - Movie at Alamanda - Dinner - rot at home till sleep time

See, how simple it would have be if I had just get on with such plan.....

Saturday night, received an sms from my friend. Apparently, my labmates were really insisted that we attend the picnic on Sunday. It was actually hiking and picnic which my friend and me decided not to go. They texted that if we dont want to hike, can just come over for the picnic after they hiked down.

lazy lazy lazy~ My Sunday has been reserved for me chilling at home or for outing with someone that I can talk craps for hours xP So, really reluctant to attend the picnic. After weighing all the pros and cons, notwithstanding the fact that I gonna spend the next 2 years with them, so just had to drag my ass off the bed at 8am on Sunday.

The picnic was good, the place beautiful, the food aplenty(which I partially hate xd) and the weather had been kind enough to us. Wrapped things up at 1pm and I was ready to spend the remaining hours to compose myself. Halfway back, my friend called. He just got into accident on his way back. We were really shocked and made U-turn to check his condition. Thanks God he was fine with no injury but can't say the same thing for the car. I let the picture showed u why, ain't that good at explaining this kind


So yeah, it was quite bad. Waited for the tow truck to pull the car out. 2 hours later, it was done and 220 bucks transferred hand. Freaking expensive but no choice. Good thing the car can still move after such accident.

In the end, I reached home at 5pm, tired and tired. What made my day was talking crap with my dearie tuls in the night and laughed my ass off ^_^

Ah well~ raya next week and I'm sure gonna have some time off =)

Love,
me

Sorry for been such a jerk yesterday night. It was silly of me and unfair to u for me to think such way.

I knew u gonna be busy with study and assignment but look like I was not prepared enough to handle it. Never expected u to be that busy at all. Certain days, we have so limited time to have a decent conversation and even weekend was no exception. Now I know.

So I won't demand much from u anymore, bii. Whenever u can afford to have a rest and chat with me, I'll be content; let it be how short. Your study takes top priority right now what with the ridiculous workloads they throw at u. It gonna take lots of hard work and sleepless night to even get through it. I'll be waiting whenever u wanna de-stress and forget about ur study =)

Go become kiasu and come back with master, bii =P hahahaha

Think.........alot before open ur mouth

Love,
dear

Last thursday had been a resting day for me since I was still freaking tired from the Kuching trip. Slept till 10+ which is something rarely happen for me. Kept rolling around till midday before went down to find brunch.

Decided to do some spring cleaning with my lappy. Too much files that hogged down its performance and made it slow. That was when I came across my porn stash XD

It was collection of videos downloaded from a year ago till now. Some, I only skimmed through since they were kinda boring but forgot to delete it.

Before the cleaning, there were like 75G worth of porn in that one folder. After an hour or so of re-watching each single one *blush blush* and sorting out, managed to bring it down to just 20G. The best collection, the cream on top of the cake. hehe =P

Time to make it hidden again XD

Hopefully not everything =D

Love,
me

The shortest, most tiring trip ever.

2 nights of nocturnal activity and haphazard sleeping schedule. Heck, I be on bed for less than 6 hours for that whole 2 days.

Seeing my friend been such a happy boy on his graduation day, it was worth itand drool over all the hotties in his uni

Spent more time with him for the convo than going around Kuching. Didn't really mind since that was the main reason I went there.

Managed to buy these to bring back to Semenanjung


This gonna be a really long, long paragraph.

After this trip, I did come to a conclusion to what it should be. There were lots of ups and downs in these 5 years of knowing u and I had been really patient no matter what u thrown at me. Well, it's actually more like 4 and half years. Remember the silent treatment u gave me for 6 months? Then u decided to talk to me again and I put everything aside and welcomed u back without even asking why. All went well until the exam result came out and u were cold again. Hey, I didn't wish for u to fail and in all honesty, it was actually ur own fault. Me been a good friend, I couldn't stand seeing u been depressed and tried to cheer u up even though I was busy preparing for my flight. Other friends were having fun exploring new place while me patiently online every night till late listening to ur problem, helping u sort out which uni u can go and course that suited u. I smiled even though inside, I was freaking tired. For 3 years, ur problem is my problem and together, we tried to solve everything u faced. Slowly, your life started to improve and I was happy for u. U decided to come over to my place for holiday and I made ur stay the most comfortable one I can prepare. Heck, I even turned down invitation to go perform in Sydney because it clashed with ur itinerary. Things changed. Once u started working, I heard less from u. I gave u benefit of doubt, maybe u were too busy with work. I said "Hi" and ur reply was never on time. I kept holding on because I was foolish enough to hope things will get better once u settled down with work but it didn't. I am tired, finally. I really am. I tried my best and look like it ain't good enough for u. Other than bii, no one else knows how much I had sacrificed for u, physically and mentally. It's time for me to let it go. I will not chase after u anymore. If u feel like it, u are welcomed to return but I can't guarantee the feeling will still be there.

Goodbye.

Love,
me

A small trip to a middle of nowhere....

Need a bit of rest from this place. Been a month since the last time I ever venture out of here.....

Just one-day trip to Kuching but it should be sufficient especially when I am on a really tight budget for the next 5 months...

A lot of things happened since I booked this tix. The enthusiasm to travel has diminished significantly though it be a waste to just forfeit it. Hence, I think I will let this be the decisive factor.

Do I keep hold on to it or I will just let it slip through.....

Such a mess~

Still, it's nice to be remembered

Love,
me

"Top? Bottom?"

That is like the most common question ever asked by guys though not the most appropriate one when u just started dating someone =P Not like I have ask him yet, can't be bother by it and ain't too keen to know.

There is one other question that I found hard to answer since the question is kinda vague in nature or maybe just because I never put serious thinking in understanding it.

What is ur expectation out of this relationship/meeting this someone/dating that guy?(or something in that same line)

I don't really like that question because I do believe that in a relationship or in meeting a new guy or in any encounter, u simply don't put any expectation. One reason is to be fair with that guy and secondly, to avoid disappointment.

Now, when I been asked that same question by him, I stumbled upon words and still not able to come up with convincing answer. If I really have to answer it, my expectation might be something like this:

1. I expect u to always tell the truth, no matter how painful it gonna be because lying will hurt more.
2. I expect u not to hide anything from me. U can choose when to tell, I will wait.

See, only 2 that I can come up with. If u ask me what I don't expect from him, I can easily answer that.

1. I don't expect u to be there for me all the time. I understand u have ur own life over there. Just a minute or two here and there and I'll be content for now.

I think that should be it. I never demand much since I also can't provide much.

Be content with whatever u get and u will be happy.

Love,
me

Language is inseparable from culture.

One language can sound differently according to where geographical location and the people speaking. Just look at english or malay or mandarin. Just one simple language can have several dialects and pronunciations in just one country.

Take english. UK english sounds as weird as US english and definitely not similiar with Australian slang. Each single one is unique and reflects the country of origin.

The same goes with manglish (malaysia english). We also have our own trait/way in speaking english. Personally, I am not ashamed of the influence it has on my english.

If it is acceptable for other countries to have their own way of speaking english, why shouldn't we? I am quite irritated when was told not to speak manglish. Why the same thing not said to UK speaker or Australian speaker.

If u have a solid grasp of english, it is acceptable if u want to speak it out in whatever slang u wish, even manglish.

Be proud.

Love,
me

Most have known about this but here's the gist of it.