Saturday, November 23, 2013

ORIGINALLY POSTED ON "THE BEST IS YET TO COME" 
http://brillanrayos.blogspot.com/2013/11/the-best-two-years-so-far.html

With Thanksgiving approaching, I have been thinking about some of the many blessings I enjoy. One of those blessings has been an unending series of of experiences that, in retrospect, have built upon one another.

During my first week as a new mission president, my secretary brought a stack of letters into my office and asked me the sign them. In response to my query, he explained that they were the “death letters” for missionaries who would be released in three months.
Death letters? I soon learned that there was a rich culture of death surrounding the completion of missionary service: we sang for the “dead,” junior companions “killed” their senior companion. I had only been mission president for a couple of weeks when we had our first transfers and I interviewed a group of missionaries they day before they returned home. It was a somber occasion, not unlike a funeral.  What I began to realize during the course of those interviews was that these missionaries – most of the 21 years old – felt that the best of their life was over. It became clear during the course of the interviews that they had been told over and over again in countless ways that their mission would be the best two years of their life. It also became clear that my job was to convince them that that was a lie!
A mission is a remarkable, memorable, unique and life-changing experience in so many ways it would be almost impossible to describe them all. But the best two years of your life? I hope not! A mission is the best two years of your life so far. One of my jobs as mission president was to remind missionaries that, and incredible as the past two years or eighteen months had been, the best was yet to come. For missionary at the end of his or her mission, it is hard to imagine that any two year period could even match, let alone exceed the past two years. But it can, and it should. No one should reach their apogee at age 21.
Noah's Ark - click to enlarge
The Best Two Years: Between High School and Mission
As evidence, I have been reflecting on my own life. For more than a decade, I lived it in two-year periods, each building on the previous. I was seventeen when I graduated from high school, and the next two years – as a college student – became the best two years of my life (so far). My decision to attend BYU was made after high school graduation, and I didn’t know a single soul who was planning to go to BYU that fall. I unpacked my bags in a stark dorm room without a friend on the campus.  Because of missionary restrictions imposed due to the military draft, I would not be eligible for a mission for another year and half. Those early semesters at BYU were the best two years (actually about eighteen months) of my life to that point. It was a period of personal growth, great new friendships, social development, learning. What could be better than being a college student in the Sixties?!
The Best Two Years: A Mission
What could be – and was – better was being a missionary. I arrived in Cordoba, Argentina in June, two years after I had graduated from high school. The next two years were amazing. I learned a new language, experienced a new culture, met remarkable people, struggled, worked, got rejected, and witnessed miracles. My companions and I were given responsibilities and expectations. We got up early every morning, we worked hard, and we slept well. We did things. By the time I returned home two years later I was a very different person than I had been when I left. I had confidence, I could look people in the eye, I could teach, I knew things, I could do things. It was the best two years of my life.
The Best Two Years: More College
I arrived home from the mission field one week before classes started, and I spent the next two years finishing my college degree. It was as different from being a missionary as being a missionary had been different from being a college freshman. But it was a remarkable two years, filled with learning, growth and fun. I had wonderful roommates. Many of them were friends and companions  from the mission, but we rarely spoke of our mission memories – our life was too full with classes, dating, Church service, and planning for the future to spend much time reminiscing. During those two years, my gospel knowledge increased, my social skills improved (I still had a long ways to go from the geeky high school kid whose primary extracurricular activity was teaching a slide rule class), and my testimony deepened. It was the best two years yet.
The Best Two Years: Graduate School
After college graduation, I spent the next two years in Boston earning an MBA at the Harvard Business School. It was an amazing two years, and changed my life. I have often joked that my experience at the Harvard Business School was the best two years and $10,000 of my life! Everything about it was life-changing for me: living in Boston, traveling around New England, school, Church, new friends. Many of my closest friends today date from those years in Boston. Between years I worked in New York City, and no one can live in New York without having it change their life. And it was near the end of these two years that I met and fell in love with a beautiful young woman from Dallas, Kathleen Hansen.
The Best Two Years: Ad Infinitum
I could continue. The next two years Kathleen and I spent in New York City. We became “city people” – and we still love urban life. I served in a bishopric, we made great friends, we learned, we grew, and we had our first child. It was such a remarkable couple of years that we thought nothing would ever be better and that we would never be that happy again! We then went to Salt Lake City for two years where I dabbled in real estate development, served on a high council, had another child, and had experiences which shaped our lives. 
After that, the two-year cycle changed: we spent a year in Bloomfield Hills, Michigan (where we had another child); five years in Grand Rapids, Michigan (three more children); two more years in Bloomfield Hills (a ward that changed our life); ten years in Arizona (where we wondered if we had really been happy anywhere else). There we had our sixth child, I served in a stake presidency, and we had Church, work, family and social experiences that kept us growing and learning.  A career move brought us reluctantly to Salt Lake – could anything ever be better than that magical decade in Arizona? 
The answer, of course, was yes. We segment the past nineteen years in Salt Lake mostly by Church callings. I served for several years on the high council under the tutelage of the legendary stake president, Theodore M. Jacobsen. When he was released, I was called as stake president. I was pretty certain that serving as president of the Bonneville Stake was the best calling in the Church and that nothing would ever compare to it. Then I served three years as president of the Spain Barcelona Mission. More miracles, more learning, more growth, increased faith, deeper testimony, and the most amazing young men and women I had ever met! Then it was over. Could anything even come close? I never imagined how much I would learn and how much fun I would have after the mission. I have felt the guidance of the Spirit in remarkable ways, seen many miracles in my family, and continued to learn and grow. I thought I understood baptism as a mission president, but working in the temple has given me a deeper understanding and appreciation of the power of ordinances. Pursuing my goal of writing has been extraordinarily rewarding. And the great friendships and associations from BYU, Harvard, New York City, Michigan, Arizona and Barcelona continue to be a source of satisfaction and learning.

I can hardly wait to see what’s next!
Tell us about your most recent two years. Share your thoughts by commenting below, or submit your own post to the blog (send to clark.hinckley@gmail.com).

Sprint the Finish

On October 29, Ada and I received the following email from the one and only Brooke Clayton Boyer:

There is a saying in marathon training that you should always "sprint the finish," or put your final, hardest, strongest push in the last mile of the race.

It's November, the holidays are upon us, I just spent a week eating chocolate in place of everything else, and I feel like this holiday season, I want to give myself the present of health!  Back when I was single and had hours a day to work out and disposable income for Whole Foods (sigh), my sister put together a community health challenge.  I thought she was nuts.  Now I, too, am nuts, and crazy loves company, so I'm swiping her idea (I take it all back, Heather), and hoping I can find a few other crazies out there to up the ante for us all.  I'm adding a big list of women on here, and please feel free to add more: no cap on entries! The more, the merrier.  And no pressure whatsoever if for any reason this doesn't interest you.  

Here's how it works:
  • To join, you pay $30 into the Challenge Fund.  All the $$ in the Fund goes to the PRIZES described below
  • Earn points each day (10 max per day, 70 max per week)
  • Stick to a list of daily health goals, plus a bonus goal each week.  One point per goal per day. Here are the goals:
  1. Drink 6 glasses of water 
  2. No more than 1 serving refined sugar per day
  3. No eating after 8 pm or when dinner finishes, whichever is later
  4. Exercise for at least 30 minutes, 5 days per week
  5. Eat at least 6 servings of veggies and fruit
  6. Study 20 minutes of holy text (or other personally uplifting work)
  7. Record one thing you're grateful for in journal
  8. Work toward one personal goal
  9. Record daily points on the group Google Doc to stay accountable and encourage others
  10. WILD CARD, announced each week (ideas welcome)
The Challenge will start on Friday, November 1, after we binge through Halloween, then we'll stick to the goals every day, for about eight weeks, and finish just in time for Christmas on December 22

Now, most importantly, the prize $!  There are 2 categories of winners:

(1) The three participants with the most points. 80% of the cash in the Challenge Fund will be divided among the three challengers with the most points. For example, if there is $500 in the kitty, $400 will be allocated amongst the three players with the most points. And, (2), a prize everyone can be eligible for: All participants with more than 70% of the available points. Because the Challenge is partly about getting the most points, but mostly about process, any person who gets an average of 7 points or better per day, will have won, and will be eligible for a random giveaway which will be funded by the remaining 20% in the Challenge Fund. 

After a bit of consideration, we decided to join up because it's mostly things we ought to be doing anyway.  Even in my pregnant state.  Caboose will surely be happier with 6 servings of veggies and fruits rather than the 6 servings of Halloween candy she's been getting.  Right?  By the end of Friday, there were 46 people signed up, making the available pot of gold a whopping $1380!  Brooke created Google spreadsheets in which to record points, with instructions for each competitor to record their personal goal for the group to see.  

As we should have expected, the competitors list includes mostly type-A super accomplished personalities, including a smattering of Claytons, several lawyers and law professors, at least one doctor (who we later learned is also vegan) and more Ivy League degrees than we can count.  Almost immediately, the collection of lawyers started requesting further defined terms.  The biggest exchange to date has been over The Sugar Rule (in caps because, well, that's what we do with defined terms).  Roughly a dozen emails flew back and forth on Saturday about what exactly constitutes 1 serving of refined sugar.  After consulting with The Doctor, Brooke sent a refined rule:  

"Three ways to answer, "Is this my one serving of sugar?"  Choose the one that's strictest:  (1) You can consult WebMD Sweets and Treats portion size.  (2) Read the nutrition information on the packaging.  (3) If it tastes like a treat, smells like a treat, bumps you off the wagon like a treat, IT'S A TREAT!  Now get back to that edamame."

One lawyer responded with a proposal that we return to "the original version of rule 2 with regard to sugar" which was "one serving means the usually-very-small-defined serving size for the refined-sugar item you are eating, and anything with refined sugar added/on the ingredient list, including sugary cereals, yogurts, beverages, etc. counts."  His expanded analysis:

"I can see reasons why the new rule (which as I read it says "you can only eat one serving per day from the following three categories: (a) food with refined sugar in it, (b) food with 15g or more of sugar per serving, and (c) food that can be plausibly categorized as a 'treat'") would be overall better for my health, but I think it has some serious problems (for example, it rules out lots of fruits, which kind of conflicts with rule 6), and it is much more complicated than the prior version and harder to administer/follow.

People could certainly make reasonable arguments in favor of the original rule AND in favor of the new rule (or in favor of any number of other specific sugar-intake rules that could take their place),so  I suggest that we just stick with the version that was in place when everyone signed up and move ahead with that one.  None of the rules are perfectly tailored as a guide for healthy living for the rest of my life, but all of them (including the original refined sugar rule) will have a beneficial impact on a person's lifestyle, and at the end of the day, contest rules are all inherently arbitrary on some level, so I think we should just use the rule that everyone was planning/expecting to follow, despite its flaws."

Michelle Mumford (resume: BYU law grad, former associate for Very Large New York Firm, current elected official in the Utah Republican Party, new Associate Dean of Admissions at BYU law school, and mother of 6 - including twin boys less than a year old) responded with a simple "I guess I didn't see the new rule as a new rule but only how to define sugar intake. I understand I can't eat refined sugar and I can have one serving-size treat a day. Is that correct?"  

And here the doctor weighs in again to explain the 15g rule:  "If a product (muffin, yogurt, juice, luna bar, green smoothie, ice cream, M&Ms etc) has more than 15 gms of sugar per serving then it counts as your serving of sugar for the day. Yes, this means that ice cream and orange juice would both count - choose wisely.   Naturally occurring sugars in the form of whole fresh fruits are exempt.  So I think this is more of a clarification of how to define your preferred sugary-type product."

YIKES!!  My orange juice and green smoothie could count?  Matt Clayton pointed out that a Costco apple spice muffin is as much of a sugary treat as the chocolate donut next to it, which is an idea I can get behind. But Ada and I can't process the thought of orange juice as our one-serving treat.  Another participant said she felt that if the treat was just a small piece of candy that was shy of 15g of sugar, then it didn't count as your sugar serving.  Which as I read it means that I could have a rather significant number of Halloween candies a day if I just spread them out over several non-servings.

Brooke issued her final ruling late Saturday night:  "I think the preceding sugar comments have been provocative; thanks all.  If nothing else, it's clear that lots of folks are making some pretty impressive efforts to cut added sugar out of all their food, not just dessert, as a matter of habit.  So if you find yourself in the more liberally-minded "one serving sugar" camp, and you're in it to win it, it's probably worth scaling back your big-dessert-dreams (or not taking the point when it's a stretch).  Rising tide lifts all boats."

So that's where we currently stand with respect to sugar.  Now, what does "personal goal" mean?  After noticing some hard-to-quantify goals on the group challenge board, people started weighing with suggestions for term definition.  Brooke's eventual ruling:  "The idea here is that you choose one challenging goal that you can score a point for every day.  So to earn the point, you need a measurable, specific, 'reach' goal that you can identify as having hit or not hit each day.  And it has to show up on the Challenge Board for you to claim the point."

Ada, wisely avoiding risking input from 46 people, texted Brooke to ask about Fast Sunday.  Some Challengers are LDS, some are not.  Brooke's advice to the group was to adjust the food you do eat post-Fast to fit the guidelines.  Because what we all want is a post-Fast salad.  But given the number of Competitors, including Ada, who scored 10 points yesterday, I suspect there were lots of post-Fast salad/water-guzzling dinners last night!

So that's where we stand, folks.  Ada and I will keep you updated on this hilarious process in which we compete for cash with the most competitive group of people we know.  There's bound to be more hilarity between now and December 22.  For now, I'm guzzling water and trying desperately to stick to this week's Wild Card challenge:  no soda.  Oh how I'm missing a good Diet Coke right now!