I have been working on this post for over three weeks! There are so many little details that I keep remembering and adding in...since our blog is also our family's scrapbook, this is a long post chronicling Josiah's birth. If you aren't up for all the details, you can skip to the end for pictures of Josiah. :)
our breech baby
As I've shared previously, we had known Josiah was breech since (at least) early January. His little head was always on my upper right side. He usually was facing my back; though, one time when I went to the doctor in late February, he was facing my left side. We tried everything we could to get baby to flip! I went to both an acupuncturist and a chiropractor twice a week who specialized in helping babies flip with the Webster Technique. We put ice and peppermint oil on the top of my belly and heat on the bottom to encourage baby to flip...all while I did inversions head-first off the side of my couch. We went swimming just three days before Josiah was born, and I did headstands underwater over and over for nearly two hours. I laid head-down on a closed ironing board propped against our couch.
We had heard from multiple sources that the best doctor in the nation for delivering breech babies is in DFW. But, we weren't willing to change doctors in order to deliver a breech baby--partly because of the risks involved and also due to how much I love my doctor. My doctor was planning on scheduling an external cephalic version for me at 39 weeks if baby still hadn't turned. (An external cephalic version is a procedure done in labor & delivery where a maternal/fetal specialist manually tries to move baby into a head-down position.) But, I never had my version because--much to our surprise!--we didn't make it 39 weeks!
A few last pictures from being pregnant...
our breech baby
As I've shared previously, we had known Josiah was breech since (at least) early January. His little head was always on my upper right side. He usually was facing my back; though, one time when I went to the doctor in late February, he was facing my left side. We tried everything we could to get baby to flip! I went to both an acupuncturist and a chiropractor twice a week who specialized in helping babies flip with the Webster Technique. We put ice and peppermint oil on the top of my belly and heat on the bottom to encourage baby to flip...all while I did inversions head-first off the side of my couch. We went swimming just three days before Josiah was born, and I did headstands underwater over and over for nearly two hours. I laid head-down on a closed ironing board propped against our couch.
We had heard from multiple sources that the best doctor in the nation for delivering breech babies is in DFW. But, we weren't willing to change doctors in order to deliver a breech baby--partly because of the risks involved and also due to how much I love my doctor. My doctor was planning on scheduling an external cephalic version for me at 39 weeks if baby still hadn't turned. (An external cephalic version is a procedure done in labor & delivery where a maternal/fetal specialist manually tries to move baby into a head-down position.) But, I never had my version because--much to our surprise!--we didn't make it 39 weeks!
A few last pictures from being pregnant...
 This is the last chalkboard photo we took. |
I was so tired before Josiah was born. We stayed home a lot...
and snuggled a lot!
swimming and doing handstands underwater just three days before Josiah was born
|
working through fear
And, that is just fine that we didn't make it to 39 weeks--actually, it's more than fine, because Josiah came at his perfect time. As much as we hoped that Josiah would flip, our preeminent prayer was that our baby would have a healthy birth. The anxiety and fear I struggled with--especially in my last weeks of pregnancy--were harder and, at times, more terrifying than I'd have ever imagined before I was pregnant. Dave fielded many panicky phone calls where I was so worried about baby's movement. Sometimes, my fear felt like it was too much and I wondered how I'd mentally survive another day of being pregnant. Then, I'd remember how much I struggled with fear during Isaac and Emma's adoptions. Or, I'd remember how much I wrestle with fear when I'm not with my children and worry if they'll be safe in someone else's care.
One of the verse that we studied in Bible Study Fellowship a few weeks before Josiah was born was Deuteronomy 16:11a, " So you shall rejoice in every good thing which the Lord your God has given to you and your house." This was the reminder I needed to rejoice in and treasure all the good things that I was experiencing--a healthy pregnancy, baby moving--and not focus on the what ifs. I prayed many times that God would help me to do this, and He did. That's not at all to say that there still weren't some very terrifying moments for me when I didn't feel baby moving right away, but God changed my perspective and helped me in my moments of fear.
daytime - March 10
And, that is just fine that we didn't make it to 39 weeks--actually, it's more than fine, because Josiah came at his perfect time. As much as we hoped that Josiah would flip, our preeminent prayer was that our baby would have a healthy birth. The anxiety and fear I struggled with--especially in my last weeks of pregnancy--were harder and, at times, more terrifying than I'd have ever imagined before I was pregnant. Dave fielded many panicky phone calls where I was so worried about baby's movement. Sometimes, my fear felt like it was too much and I wondered how I'd mentally survive another day of being pregnant. Then, I'd remember how much I struggled with fear during Isaac and Emma's adoptions. Or, I'd remember how much I wrestle with fear when I'm not with my children and worry if they'll be safe in someone else's care.
One of the verse that we studied in Bible Study Fellowship a few weeks before Josiah was born was Deuteronomy 16:11a, " So you shall rejoice in every good thing which the Lord your God has given to you and your house." This was the reminder I needed to rejoice in and treasure all the good things that I was experiencing--a healthy pregnancy, baby moving--and not focus on the what ifs. I prayed many times that God would help me to do this, and He did. That's not at all to say that there still weren't some very terrifying moments for me when I didn't feel baby moving right away, but God changed my perspective and helped me in my moments of fear.
daytime - March 10
My mom kept my kids on Tuesday, March 10, and I went downtown for my 37 week appointment. For some reason, I wondered if it might be the last time I'd hear baby's heartbeat via the doppler, so I recorded that sweet sound on my phone. Then, I went to a chiropractic appointment. After my appointments, I ran to Buy Buy Baby to buy swaddling blankets that I hoped to use in our hospital session pictures. I was having contractions on and off. They felt like the same contractions I'd had the previous weekend. Throughout the morning, they definitely felt more distinctive and stronger than Braxton-Hicks contractions, but they were still fairly spaced apart. After all my appointments and errands, though, I texted Dave and said that they seemed to be coming closer together.
I was starving, so I grabbed some lunch and headed home. My mom met me with my kids, and I wasn't about to say anything to her about my contractions, since I definitely didn't want her to worry. Emma took a nap, Isaac played in his room, and I tried to lay down, but I just couldn't get comfortable with my contractions. I tried to take a bath, since my nurse & doula had both told me that oftentimes contractions will dissipate in a warm bath. My contractions didn't go away, but they definitely slowed down enough so that I could take a nap.
evening--March 10
David and I had our last Birth Boot Camp class downtown that evening. Our class had lasted ten weeks, and it had become our weekly tradition to go on a quick dinner date before class since Dave has been working downtown. We chatted for a second on the phone and decided to meet at a Mexican restaurant. But, I started desperately craving breakfast food as I drove. (During my last weeks of pregnancy, I craved pancakes, waffles, and French toast all the time. We even ate dinner at IHOP on Valentine's Night so I could have Belgian waffles.) Dave agreed to give up Mexican so we could go to The Olde Pancake House in Fort Worth.
After dinner we went to birth class. I timed my contractions all throughout class. On our break halfway through class, I talked with our teacher (who is also a doula) and asked what she thought. She thought I should go home and lay down! I wasn't convinced I was in "real" labor since my contractions had slowed down that afternoon when I'd taken a bath, so I stayed for the rest of class. Plus, I didn't want to miss any part of our last class!
When I got home, I tried to go to bed, but by this point my contractions were strong enough that I couldn't relax, much less get to sleep. I laid in bed and continued timing my contractions. In my mind, I played out every possible situation of what could possibly happen that night. Around 1am, I was uncomfortable enough that I decided to take another bath. I really had convinced myself that my contractions would slow down enough from the warm water & that I'd be able to finally go to sleep. Needless to say, I was pretty surprised when I had two strong contractions closer together than they'd been all evening after getting in the water. At this point, my contractions were about five minutes apart. I really wanted Dave to get as much sleep as possible, since I knew that there wouldn't be any sleep for a long time once I woke him up & we headed to the hospital. Finally, around 2am, I woke Dave up. He immediately sat straight up and asked, "What's wrong?" When I explained how close together my contractions were, he laid back down and asked, "Do you know what this means?" Haha! Yes, I definitely did!
heading to the hospital
heading to the hospital
I quickly called our friend, Kimi, and asked if she could come and spend the rest of the night with our kids. I had packed hospital bags the previous weekend when I started having contractions, so we just had a few more things to put in the suitcase. Kimi came over right away! She said she even ran a red light on her way. Kimi took this picture and prayed for us.
We walked outside to Dave's truck, & it took Dave a little while to clean out his truck to fit our suitcases and me! While he was cleaning, I looked up at the clear night sky. I couldn't believe that this was the night I'd hold our baby in my arms. This drive downtown in the middle of the night was so different than our last middle of the night trip downtown when I was bleeding so badly at 12 weeks. I felt the baby moving a lot as we drove, and I felt that baby's extra kicks were God's way of reminding me that there was nothing to fear.
We called our doula, Lindsay, on the way to tell her we were heading to the hospital. She thought that I was speaking so calmly that they'd likely give me an Ambien and wait to do my c-section in the morning.
at the hospital
Dave dropped me off at the entrance to the maternity wing, and I had a hard time getting upstairs to labor and delivery registration. I'm not sure if I took a wrong turn or went up the wrong elevator, because I wandered through a darkened hallway and pushed through a set of doors causing an alarm to sound! I finally found the nurse station in L & D. A nurse asked, "Can I help you with anything?" I said, "Yes! Hopefully to have a baby!"
Things moved very quickly after that! I was assigned a room, a hospital employee reviewed insurance with me, and another nurse started putting my IV in. At this point, my contractions were about 4 minutes apart and were becoming even more intense. I couldn't talk or move during one. While I knew I wasn't going to be able to experience a natural delivery as I had hoped, I am thankful that I got to experience this much of labor. Our nurse, Amy, was amazing, and I am confident God planned for her to be working the shift when Josiah was born! She usually works at a different Harris hospital, but she was called into Harris Fort Worth that night because they were so busy. She was a homeschooling mom of three kids & was married to a pastor. She had friends that attended our church, and her first baby was breech so she had had a c-section. I felt that Amy & I were heart friends about two minutes after meeting her...and after she held my hands and talked me through my spinal, I felt like we were best friends!
Dave came up to the room from parking in the garage, and he was completely empty-handed. When I asked him where our bags and suitcases were, he said, "I just kind of want to see if we're even going to stay!" Ha! Imagine his surprise when Amy checked me and said I was already a five! She could feel baby's little bottom sitting right on top of my cervix.
Dr. Bradford was out of town on spring break with her family, so Amy called Dr. Bradford's partner, Dr. Hardick. Dr. Hardick had apparently just finished a delivery and wasn't even home before turning around to come back for my c-section. After meeting her, she said it was policy to do a sonogram to ensure that baby was still breech. I said, "I promise the baby is still breech...the head is right here." :) Well, they still did the sonogram, and baby was still breech. Lindsay arrived and was in shock that I was already a 5. She said that I was handling labor like a third-time mom considering how calm I'd sounded when we'd talked just an hour ago. The nurses finished prepping me for my c-section, Dave kissed me good-bye, and I was wheeled down the hallway.
In my opinion, the worst part of my c-section was receiving the spinal. Our nurse, Amy, held my face in her hands and talked me through the entire process. It seemed to take quite awhile, so when she wasn't explaining to me what the anesthesiologist was doing, we chatted about homeschool curriculums, breech babies, and adoption. I really can't imagine getting through that without her! After my spinal, I laid down (or rather, I was laid down), and they put the drape up. Dave and Lindsay soon entered the OR. I was shocked when just minutes later Dave said, "He's almost out!" I had no idea they had even started my surgery, much less that my baby was nearly born!
I don't usually do well with anesthesia, and this time was no different. I was so nauseous. Dave was doing his best to keep me calm, and he kept saying, "We're about to meet our baby!" Then, he held my hand and stood up to see over the curtain. He said, "It's a...boy! And he has a lot of dark hair!" Dave's voice was just shaking with excitement! I heard someone call out "time born is 5:29 a.m."
I wasn't in the room when Isaac and Emma were born, and I wrongly thought that all babies were born squawling (you know, like they do on "Call the Midwife"). So, I was very worried as to why I couldn't hear our son. It seemed like minutes (though I'm sure it was only a few second) before we first heard a cry. Oh, how I cried then. Baby's cord was cut after pulsing for awhile. Then, the nurse put a diaper on him and brought him to me. I had still only heard him cry twice, so even when they laid him on me I kept saying, "I 'm so worried about him. I just don't know why he's not crying!" Both our nurse and doula kept reassuring me that baby was doing amazingly and that no one would know he was a boy born at 37 weeks! His Apgar scores were 8 & 9.
It's a boy! Welcome, Josiah Dodge!
Dave spent time with baby while Dr. Hardick finished my surgery. We still hadn't decided on a name, but I heard Dave tell our nurse, "He just looks like a Josiah!" I definitely agreed. I love that ultimately Dave decided on his name, although Josiah was my favorite of our top three choices.
Since I was still so nauseous, Lindsay kept applying peppermint oil to the bridge of my nose and speaking Scripture over me. Dave spent time with Josiah...I love this picture!
Eventually, Dave got so sick to his stomach that he passed Josiah back to Nurse Amy and went out into the hallway to get some fresh air. I wasn't sure what was wrong, but I heard someone call, "We'll bring you out some juice!" I didn't know that he had watched Dr. Hardick start to sew me up!
After my surgery, we all went back to recovery with Amy and Lindsay. Josiah started nursing right away, and the rest is really a blur. My spinal did a number on me! I do remember that I couldn't get over all of Josiah's hair, and I also heard Amy say, "I've only seen one other one in my twelve years of L&D." I later found out that this was in reference to Josiah's true knot in his cord. Statistically, 1 in 100 pregnancies will have some type of knot in the umbilical cord, but only 1 in 2,000 will have a true tight knot. Apparently, boys are more likely to have true knots than girls. True knots are not usually (though not always) a problem until labor begins and baby begins descending down the birth canal. We don't know if Josiah's true knot is the reason God allowed him to stay breech; but, I have cried many tears of thankfulness that Josiah's true knot was not an issue. Josiah means, "The Lord heals, the Lord saves." We completely believe that God did save our son--both through all my bleeding and subsequent massive clot during pregnancy and also from any complications with the true knot.
Josiah Dodge, you are loved.
