Thursday, July 2, 2009

a year in a post



I know that I have not posted in quite some time... almost 1 year to be exact but I actually have been writing on my blog.. just not posting. Here are a few "funnies" that I wrote down over the last year....

1. ellison woke up the other day & was saying "Hope, come get me!!!" over & over again in her crib until I came:)
2. Chase did not want to go to bed the other day so he locked his door ( learned that trick this week) & pulled it behind him. Well, I guess he won that one:) He is SO stinking smart!
3. Last but not least.... I went to get ellison out of bed this morning & Chase was in there first. Here is how the conversation went between Chase & I...
"mom, ellison got out of her bed in the middle of the night & t-ted in the corner of her room."
"Chase, that is ridiculous, she did not t-t in her room, she can't even get out of her bed!"
"no mom, it is true, look(pointing to the corner)!.
As I walked closer I knew it was true. I was FIRE mad.
"Chase, did you do this?"
"No, ellison did it."
"chase, I am going to give you one more chance.... did you do this? The truth will be the difference between one spanking or two."
"But mom!!!! I t-t in the corners of my room all the time & you & daddy don't even know."
"WHAT????"
"Yes, I do it all the time when I don't want to go to the potty."
Sure enough I went into his room to inspect & there was dried up t-t all over the corners of the room. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2 hours later I catch him t-ting on the floor again!! After a few spanks I manged to ask him why he did it again & here was his answer...
"because I thought we didn't have none potties."
Thankfully I have hardwood floors:)


Rarely do I find things that make me laugh at 4am but this morning when Ellison called me into her room I just could not help myself..
"I need my bow!"
"Ok Ellison, let me get your bow for you. Ok.. here it is."
"No, in my hair!!"
Oh my goodness... my girl has arrived!!! I had no idea that she liked to sleep with bows in her hair too!!


quotes of the year:
1. "mom, I want to have 4 and a half kids in our family & I want to name the baby Coco Bray (after his imaginary friend:)
2. I was teaching chase about stranger danger today & he came up to me & said this a few hours later...
"mom, if you want to you can borrow my sword & shield to fight off the strangers that might try to come & get me & ellison:)
3. "mom, when I go to heaven I am going to bring an eye poker so that I can fight all those guards"
4." mom, why didn't you name me Luke Skywalker? From now on I am going to be called Luke Skywalker"
5. "my arms hurt! my arms hurt!"
"what's wrong"
"well, if I don't watch tv then my arms hurt!"
6. Chase is very into coins & money right now. Today he told me... "only rich babysitters can babysit me b/c I am rich." Huh??? Not in your lifetime, buddy...
7. "Mom, Mrs. Wendy (his preschool teacher) has a new rule. It is that you can only bring chocolate for lunch to school, ok?"

Thursday, February 26, 2009

babysitter woes




okay, some of you are probably not my friend anymore b/c you feel like i have totally abandoned this blog. Not true at all. I have not totally abandoned it, I just took a little hiatus to focus on my photography & my kids. Ladies & gentlemen.. I am back in business! I must admit that it is a little bit intimidating starting to write on this blog again b/c I feel the pressure to come up with a really funny story. Oh, let me see.. that took all of about 2 seconds... got one! So... I was out at bible study tonight & a sitter was here with the kids. Poor thing she had only been here one other time in her life. I figured that chase must have been on his best behavior the last time she was here b/c she actually said "yes" when I called her today. I am pretty sure though that after today she will never say "yes" to me again. I went to bible study & when I got home chris was already here with the kids.
"how did it go, Chase?"
"not good." 
"what, why not?"
"it just didn't go good."
Oh, I thought... oh well. She was probably a really good sitter & really strict on him.. I like it! Then I went into my laundry room & things just did not look quite right in there. When I was walking around, I felt something really sticky on my feet. I also noticed that the laundry room doors were off their hinges. Hmm.....
"chase, were you in here?"
"yes, mom." 
"what were you doing in here?"
"ellison & I were hiding from the babyitter."
"oh, why were you doing that??"
" b/c we wanted to & when she came around the corner to find us we sprayed her with Oxy Clean!"
"OH MY GOSH, CHASE, you did not!"
"Um hum, we did!"
Sure enough.. the evidence was there & it all made sense to me then. Darn, I thought.. I really liked that one!


FAVORITE QUOTES OF THE MONTH(S):
1."chase, you can have an apple or an orange for your snack -  no chex mix."
"but, God said I needed chex mix...:)
2. "mommy, I am getting old like you."
"what Chase? why do you think I am getting old?"
"mom, come on, you KNOW you are getting old!"
3. "when I grow up I am gonna be a daddy & I am gonna get some beer & tea & coffee & OJ."
4. "mom, god said I need to eat cocoa puffs cereal!"
5. "mom, I need some chocolate b/c chocolate gives you energy & I really need energy right now!"
6. "mom, my girlfriends in my school are just SOOO beautiful!"
7. "mom, I colored your wall red b/c I did not like the color you had it at all..."
8. "Chase, are you my sweet boy?? 
"Yes, mom, but ellison is not. She is bad."
"Chase, ellison is not bad - she is sweet too! "
"But mom, I am a lover."  HUH????
9. "mom, was I born in a mall?" (Ut oh.. I guess that one might be my fault:)
10. someone stopped by our house the other night who we did not know well but I think chase felt pretty comfortable with him b/c this is what he told him...
"I like to pick & eat my buggers"

Monday, February 2, 2009

tonight...



Tonight was a total disaster. It is never easy when you come back from being out of town & tonight was no exception. I am not saying that my kids actually listen to me when I say "no" but today was especially horrible. I was looking forward to chris coming home early & bathing the kids & putting them to bed. Then the call comes.... "Hope, I am going to be later than I thought." 
Oh great...it is fine when chris is late & I know he is going to be late but there is something really awful about him telling me he will be home early & then calling to say he is going to be late - it is the worst! Anyhow, after I got that phone call I knew that I was just going to have to push through the rest of the night. Dinner went pretty well, bath decent....it was what happened after the bath that really sent me over the edge. Everyone was bathed & ready for bed so we did our nightly ritual of reading books together in ellison's room. Right when I finished I told the kids to hang tight b/c I had to run downstairs to grab ellison's medicine. I came downstairs & tried to listen in on what they were doing upstairs. Silence. Oh no, that is never good. More silence. Then I heard it..."ellison, your hair looks so nice like this, it really does! Mom, I am just fixing ellison's hair!" chase yelled down the stairs.
"okay chase" I called back as I was measuring out her medicine. 
"oh ellison, this really looks great!" How cute I thought... he is probably brushing her hair or putting a bow in it. I started up the stairs when I saw him rubbing some kind of substance into her hair. "What is that?" I thought. AAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!! When I came closer I spied a can of chris's hair gel in one of his hands. Ellison was putting her head down while chase sprayed her with hair gel & was liberally rubbing it all around. 
"Go to your room - you just lost your other book for the night!"
So as I proceeded to the bathroom to give ellison ANOTHER bath, I noticed that it was considerably quiet again. When I was done bathing her for a second time, I went in his room to check on the all-too-quiet Chase. LOTION... EVERYWHERE!!! He had now taken the bottle of squirt lotion & pumped about 1/2 of the bottle out all over his bed & floor. "NOOOOOOOOO!!!"
After  3 wooden spoon pops we had a talk about good behavior & forgiveness. I asked chase why he did it & he said that ellison's hair did not look good at all & that he needed to clean the floor with the lotion. Hmm... I guess I will still forgive him:) At least he does give me a good laugh..:)