The Charons

Tonight I rocked little Madilyn to sleep. The curtains were open and as I rocked her I watched outside as the lights from the city bounced off the snow. It looked majestic and almost magical. It was bright, not like the sun but light, like a general all over light. It's how I imagined the world looked when Christ was born and the Star of David lit up the sky. Peaceful, calm, quiet. I then saw this little girl in my arms and had a whole new perspective of Mary. We talk about the stress of the holidays, or of life in general, but lets take a moment to think about this amazing women.

Talk about stress, at 9 months pregnant she leaves her home, not in a Cadillac, but on a donkey. Now for those of us who have been 9 months pregnant, we don't like to go anywhere in a car, let alone on the back of an animal. They have to go pay taxes, which means then money was probably tight, we all know that stress, but they journey to Bethlehem anyways to find that there is no place to stay but a manger, a manger that has no heat, no blankets, no doors. I have to tell you it's a little hard to complain about anything when you remember Mary and her diligence. Makes me think a little more about what I have, and less on what I don't.

I also think about those in my life who hurt. I think about those who want a child who can't have one, I think about those who have illness. I think of my friend Heather who is fighting cancer. I think about my children, I think about my heart. I just want for everyone what Mary knew she had. Here is a video that just has made me so teary these last few days. It doesn't matter what religion you practice or believe, there is a peace about Christmas that will never be taken away. They may call them "holiday tree's" at the White House, but in those hearts of those who have a Savior because of Mary's love we know, and THAT will never be lost.

Watch this video. You won't regret it.

Just like that it is the end of 2009. Where did this year go? Seems like I was just blogging about loving the "ber" months: September, October, November, December, and now they are almost over.

With 2010 just around the corner my family and I have come up with ideas, New Year's resolutions if you will. The first is Family home evening. My kids truly love to do this when I am organized enough to have a lesson, so instead of Mom doing it all the time we have developed a system (which I think has a shot at working) Here it is:

1st Monday- Mom prepares lesson
2nd Monday- Do a service project or a "ding dong ditch of goodies"
3rd Monday- Kid lesson. One of the kids will be in charge of the lesson. The nights that it is Riley's turn I am sure we will be playing race cars of jumping on beds :)
4th Monday- A project. Some sort of project we will work on as a family. Whether it be making something, cleaning something or building, we will do it as a family

The next resolution that we have made is "Needs/wants" This applies more to David and I, but I think if we can communicate our Needs and/or our wants we will be happier. For example:

I NEED some Mom time. I just do. I think every mom does, so if I can communicate that to David before I blow my top than that will help. He WANTS to watch the Suns game at night, so I compromise by watching it with him, instead of making a deal about it. Give and take I guess you would call it.

This year may end up being another stressful one... we still await Dental school application decisions and it is a stressful time. So one of my goals this year is to find "Joy in the Journey" I first heard the phrase from President Monson and I really like it. So to do that, to find "Joy in the Journey" I need to better organize my time and my life.

So with that today I cleaned out linen closets, re-figured bed times and drawers and menu's.

Being a Mom is a full-time job, but another thing I AM going to accomplish this year is to get my pre-nursing requirements completed. A lot of my schooling transfers into requirements which is nice, so my goal is to finish that up and do my CNA course, so that I can at least work if I need to.

This year will bring it's challenges, we can always count on those, but I am going in with a better, more prepared frame of mind, and I think in the end WE will succeed!

Hope all of you have a wonderful year! Cheers!

P.S. I have a cooking blog, duh right! Is anyone intrested in doing a "guest" post. You would make something, give me the recipe and a picture of you and the item then I will post it. Thought it would be kind of fun to hear some of your favorite recipes. PLEASE?!?!?!?

It's the day after Christmas and the decorations are packed up until next year. Something about having a "non-cluttered" house makes me happy. Don't get me wrong I love Christmas but I also love having things back into their place. I will post pics soon but here is a run down of the last few days.

Thursday:

David got off work early at 1pm, we packed up and headed down the hill to my brother Matt's house in Cave Creek.
That night we went and saw the Temple lights on the Mesa Temple. It was CRAZY. Too many people to really enjoy it, but it was fun.

Friday:

Went to the park and had lunch with my dad, Rocco. The kids ran and played and I loved eating In-n-out. It had been too long since my last big, yummy, juicy burger. And as a bonus they gave us a Christmas card. I love companies that recognize Christmas.
Friday night we had yummy appetizers. On the menu:

shrimp cocktail and sauce
Tamales
Guac and chips
Hot spinach and artichoke dip
yummy mint truffles
Punch
Stuffed mushrooms
and cheeses

You can get most of these recipes on barbbakes

Then we watched the most amazing video of Christ's life. I don't know the name, but I will find out. I think it may be called the "Reflections of Christ"

Saturday:

up at the crack of dawn. Actually... truth be told my kids slept in until 6:45, I thought they would have been up MUCH earlier.
We had a yummy Christmas dinner with Ham, Potatoes and the BEST sweet potatoes EVER. and homemade gingerbread cake with glaze.
After we snapped some family pictures we headed back on the road and up to the snow. The cold was waiting for us, we got home and it was a balmy 12 degrees...brrrr.

This morning I went to the grocery store, target and took down Christmas. Done. Now I am ready for a nap!

I did however get the privilege of vacuuming out soda crystals out of my hubby's trunk. I never knew that EVERY can would explode when frozen. Note to self: don't leave soda in the trunk when the temp at night drops to 7. :)

This past weekend we headed to Vegas to be with one of David's former 'young men' who was going through the Temple. Brian asked David to be his escort, and I think my husband was so touched by that, so we dropped the kids in Kingman with David's mom and headed to the Temple.

For those of you who are not familiar with the area we have to pass over the Hoover Dam to get to Vegas, well, about 3 or 4 years ago they started building an overpass to take traffic off the Dam. I never thought that it would be as amazing as it was, and it was, they are not quite done with the over pass, but have the arch connected. Talk about an architectural wonder.



I wish I had some pictures from the day at the Temple, but I forgot to bring my camera in, so hopefully I can track down the pictures with us and Brian.

Yes, December is a VERY busy month for our family. Keagan and Maddys birthday's are only 1 week apart. I almost just saved Keagan's cake, but then thought it wasn't much fun for Maddy to have week-old cake. Plus the green stuff that started to grow on the princess cake had a funky smell (JUST KIDDING) So we got Maddy her very own cake, and she LOVED it. and I mean LOVE. The girl went right for the frosting, that's my girl!

Keagan had her very first birthday party this year, she was VERY excited to have 6 of her closest friends over for a PJ birthday party. WE played Christmas Bingo and other fun games. We ate Pizza and had cake (a Princess cake) and ice cream. All and all it was a success.


(and the funniest part about the whole day: When these little 6 and 7 year olds were talking about their "boyfriends" and almost kissing those said boys, so cute!)

Well, we will use that term in a sarcastic setting, happy. The day started off great, both me and he hubby had TOTALLY forgotten the fact that on that day (Dec.1st) we had been married for 8 wonderful years. fun? yes, funny that we both forgot and lucky, can you imagined if one of us actually remembered. whew!

So I shuffled around phone calls and deals until I found a friend and a babysitter, both were on board for taking the kids, my friend had the first segment of one hour. Which we thought would be perfect, until Riley had started up with a stomach ache (we didn't know until later that night) Then the pass of to the sitter went down while we were enjoying the movie "New Moon" yes, twilight fans. both of us are actually.

We started getting "texts" on David's phone talking about cranky baby, where's the bottle? Riley says his tummy hurts. Riley has a blown-out diaper, etc, etc. So once the movie was over we cancelled plans and headed home. We find Riley with poop completely down BOTH legs and feet standing on paper towels and the babysitter trying her best not to cover herself in it. Wonderful.... but wait. It gets better.

So I draw the straw that leaves me to take the sitter home, and to grab dinner. So I do just that, but after I order a Big-Mac meal for David and a chicken wrap for myself at McDonald's drive Thru I then realized that I don't have my purse. Yes friends, in all the poop commotion I had managed to drive off without my purse. So I have to get to the window, cancel the order and head home to get some $$. I then head back to McD's and get the food and head back home. finally.

By then it was 8 o'clock and I was beat, we put all the kids to bed, sat down to eat and that was it. I was out for the count.

On a lighter note, David:

I love you. Thank you for 8 wonderful years, here's to 8 more. Let's just hope those 8 years don't have as much poop :)

This picture was taken at the end of the evening.

Gosh... I can't even remember back to Thanksgiving to write about it. I will do my best. We went to K-town to be with David's family for Thanksgiving (like every year, right!) We especially not only enjoy the Thanksgiving turkey made by his Dad, Scott, but we also love to see the variety's of people gathered at the local Super Walmart for black Friday deals. It's a tradition really, just as important as turkey is hitting the Super W for toys.

I didn't take a whole lot of pictures, slipped my mind. But I can remember everything we ate, 1. because it was good, and 2. because it was the first day in awhile that I ate cooked foods. yum. I missed them. So, sorry no pictures but here is a list of yum.

Turkey (Of course, dark meat for me!)
Mashed potatoes, I like my creamy and wonderful.
Stuffing, yes please.
Sweet potato casserole with dried apricots and apples (PASS :)
Sweet potato soup (pass again, not a fan of sweet potatoes, and really, If I am going to break the rules, I am going to do it with foods I love)
My family's holiday salad (the recipe is on barbbakes.blogspot.com)
Homemade wheat rolls, yum, yum, yum. though I was good and only had 1 :)
and for dessert:

Pumpkin Pie
Gingerbread Trifle (on barbbakes.blogspot.com)
Cherry Cheese cake

and that's a wrap!

i know. i am behind on the posings... and yes, i am sorry. look for more maybe tomorrow? but for today *Keagan's birthday* and my 1 year anniversary of PPCM i have had enough, and am tired, like always. so tomorrow friends... or the next day. maybe. :)

YES, that is chocolate all over Riley's face. Mother of the Year award right here!

This week kinda went by in a daze. Can't really remember too many things about it, so we will just go kid by kid, oh and David too.

David:

Worked this week, then on Friday morning he took Riley and headed to Kingman to do a side job for our friends, The Westbrooks. He came home on Saturday night, just in time to watch Keagan start throwing up. Super fun!

Barb:

I think I probably had the MOST exciting week. I have really stuck to my diet and happy to say that I have lost 7, yes 7 pounds so far! 10 more to go before Christmas, wish me luck! I also threw a "Scentsy Party" for my friend Jeanette from Kingman. It was fun to have people from the ward over and it gave me an excuse to cook yummy things (not eat the yummy things, just cook them :)
Pictures Here:




I also took my "Before" measurements, I really had been on the diet 5 days already, but I KNOW that I have already lost more inches... YIPPEE!


Keagan:

Keagan, my little sweet Keagan has helped me this week make her birthday party invitations (very exciting stuff to a 6 almost 7 year old) she also had some :girl time: with Mom, while Dad and Riley were in Kingman. She requested to go to McDonalds where she ordered a hamburger, fries and a drink. I got a lettuce chicken wrap, hold the wrap and the sauce, so a chicken lettuce plate they should say. We also painted her nails in a "Pattern" pink, purple, pink.. ya, you know the drill. It was fun!

Riley:

This little man of mine is a wonder, a wonder that he has lived through yet another week. He is getting to be VERY sassy, and that is an understatement. I think he gets that from me (CRINGE!) He goes around asking everyone if "anyone wants to be shooted" the answer is always no, but that doesn't seem to matter. Seconds later I have to flop down on the floor and act like I am dead. tons-o-fun. I was glad to see the little guy go with Dad for a day's break. I know you think I am kidding but the little guy can TALK YOUR EAR OFF! I never have a moment of peace. sigh.... HE did spend one day throwing up, but that's what he gets for kissing a one-year old with the stomach flu ON THE MOUTH! That little girl is going to need counseling. He has NEVER done anything like that before, so I didn't really know what to do. Guess he learned his lesson, and then he was nice enough to share this stomach bug with Keagan. Fabulous!

Maddy:

Maddy is cruzin' everywhere! There is nothing that little girl can't get into, some of the weeks tragedies include:
1. the toilet paper in the bathroom (I am not sure how she got a hold of this, but I am guessing she had an accomplice) she completely unravelled the whole roll, then started eating it. YUM!
2. The DVD cabinet. I didn't even notice it was open, but minutes later she has EVERY, yes EVERY dvd, all 200 of them out and on the floor.

She has two teeth now, which makes chopping on fingers extra fun and spectacular. We love this little girl, and a bonus: Her dark hair and dark eyes are getting darker EVERYDAY! Yippee! In our family pictures we will have to sing the song, "One of these things is not like the other, one of these things just doesn't belong" :)


Keagan dancing with Maddy, so cute!

This week for FHE we made a 'thankful' tree. So we wrote things we were thankful for on the leaves, then put the leaves on the tree. It actually was a fun Family Home Evening. There were a lot of things we were grateful for, some including:

Families
cars
carpet
food
fruit (that was mine)
toys
teachers
jackets
kitchen aide mixer (mine again)
husbands ( again... mine)
books
couch
lotion
showers
fires
snow boots
fireflies
brooms
blankies (these last ones were the kiddies)

So all and all it was a success.

This week Keagan was Star of the week, so on Friday she was able to bring "show and tell" and she decided she wanted to bring her little brother and sister. So off we went to school to show off Riley and Maddy to Keagan's class. Needless to say Maddy was a hit, and Riley was unusually shy... hm..... Suspecious.

Change seems to be the theme of my year. And yesterday's news was no exception. After meeting with my heart Dr. we came to three conclusions:

1. My heart EF rate will never be what it was
2. We need to get me out and about again (for personal sanity reasons)
3. Diet will now play just as big of role as medication does

diet, yes, I used the "d" word, the forbidden word in our house. Those who know me, know that I Do. not. diet. I love food, it was the one stress relief that worked, and now... GONE.

I feel very overwhelmed about the three new things I have learned, and in light of trying to keep my positive attitude I just keep saying, "The only thing I won't miss is my waist line!"

So what can I eat? I am asking that same question, I will meet with my Dr. again along with a dietitian next week, but this is what I do know:

I CAN NOT eat anything that is an animal bi-product. Like, eggs, milk, cheese, meat. No grains. Like, Bread, pasta, rice *all my fav's by the way*

I CAN eat dark leafy greens, for calcium. Lots of nuts, but that will be kinda tricky with Riley's highly allergic nature. I will just have to wash my hands and brush my teeth ALL the time.

Fresh fruits, mainly the ones with seeds. staying away from Bananas. All fresh vegetables.

and the kicker....

I CAN'T COOK ANY OF IT! No cooking.

What? you might ask.... EXACTLY. Now you know why I went to be crying last night. So any suggestions or support would be greatly appreciated.

I am off to go have fruit and salsa for breakfast. yum. (sarcasm intended!)

to leave this on a positive note.... yesterday Riley asked me to keep his toys away from "swiper" I asked who "swiper" was, he said Maddy! (Swipper is the fox that takes things on the show Dora) Put a smile on my face for the whole day.

I love my little family, especially the three littlest ones!

We are potty-training Riley right now, and he is doing GREAT! An occasional slip on the back end (which is to be expected), and yesterday he said, "Mom, are there really potty trains?" Yes Riley. There are "potty Trains" they come to good boys who do poo-poo on the potty.

Which he did yesterday, which yes, he got up bright and early this morning and wanted his potty train.

Way to go Riley!

So on Saturday I bloggged about my mission to have a positive week... and I have! Even with potty training and holiday stresses I have managed to keep a smile on my face, amazing, right?

My new goal of staying loyal to those not around has also been a great achievement. All in all I feel like a new, better person. Of course we are just in week one of this new endeavor. (ha ha)

Keagan has no school today and I started the morning out by making homemade waffles (always a big hit with my little munchkins) Want the recipe? Go to HERE and look under the breakfast category!

well... that's about all for this time. Hope your week is going well.

Barb

oh.. couldn't leave you empty handed... here is a pic of Maddy this morning:

I just left my friend Skye's wedding. What a beautiful day, I was glad to be a small part of her happiness. As I drove down the mountain I thought about how many wonderful things Skye has taught me.

oh... this is Skye:


(I know, she's a hottie!)

So here are the list of things I have learned from my friend. Some I took for granted, and others I have taken to heart, but all have meaning.

1. Life is a process. It's not that you pass a certain mile mark and you show up at the turn in the road called, "life" You are there. constantly. Making the best and the worst of it. It's a process

2. Everything is not a competition. Skye is not a person that likes to get ahead at others expense. It's refreshing. Skye is Skye. and I am Me, when I am around her. It's not always about getting ahead at someones expense. Thank goodness there are still those types out there.

3. Life is magical, and Heavenly Father is in control. Skye thinks everything in life that is "right" is magical. It's refreshing what a positive outlook she has on things. something I know I can work on.

4. Give your whole heart. why not? We only live once, why not give it all we can.


I know that sometimes I find myself on the wrong side of the lesson. Things this past week have been hard, and instead of being grateful for the challenge and growth I find that I have been negative. Life lessons are not going to disappear from my life until I embrace the lesson and learn from it.

I drove by our old house tonight, I had the pleasure to visit with our old neighbors, the Watson's (so good to see your family by the way :) and while I was visiting I found myself wishing we were back in our old house, with our old life. Without the trials that we have had this past year. But then I stopped, and realized without these trials I would not have the relationship with my Father in Heaven that I do now. I need him now, I needed him back then, but never knew it. I turn to him now, in prayer. often.

What a nice ending to an emotionally stressful week. I have priorities this next week to make it a great one. Want to know what they are? Ya, I will tell you anyways...

1. Not to get caught up in the drama.(just because I know something doesn't mean EVERYONE needs to know. I really need to work on this)
2. To be loyal to those not around.
3. To appreciate the things I do have
4. To show love to my family in all ways
5. To write thank you notes to these people:
a. my Mom and Dave. For endless reasons.
b. my Dad, Rocco. We are staying in his townhouse and we are grateful for him for allowing us to be there
c. My friend Jill, she has always been a soft place to fall, we have been through it all and I want to write to her telling her how much she means to my life
d. To my husband. for being a sounding board and a voice of reason.


I'll start with that. I love my family, my little family and my extended family. I love my brothers, they teach me how to be a better person on a daily basis. I have a past of letting them down, and I am glad they forgive me.

I hope everyone has a marvelous week... and one last thing.

Heather S. I am thinking about you and praying for you. I have no idea what to say, except for, hang in there.

And one last, last thing... Check out barb Bakes (click on the picture on the top right) I plan on making some goodies this week

This was the ONE thing that made me smile yesterday. The kids swinging on the playground while waiting for Keagan to get out of school.

Two things we do everynight:



Play games together


and light a fire!

Love this time of year.

SUCCESS! That is how I would describe our night last night. We attended our ward's Trunk or Treat, then hit the streets for some good ol' door to door candy extravaganza! We went to a neighborhood that has houses that are closer together to make for easy walking.
Every house we would come to, the Snow Princess and Buzz would run to the door, ring the door bell, and the moment they answered Keagan would say, "trick or treat" and Riley would ask, "Do you have dogs?" (My son is deathly afraid of dogs) I think people were asking if he had "dots" like the candy. Some would hear him and say, "no darling, no dogs here" It was just so out of his comfort zone, but the love of candy pushed him through!
We carried Maddy and we pushed a stroller, so Riley would jump on and ride from house to house. Keagan was too excited to hold still for more than a minute... I think she ended up running to every house! We had a great night, we were home by 7 to pass out candy, and yep you guessed it... NOT ONE! So we have LOTS of candy that we will be freezing for next year.

Keagan:

There was no surprise that Keagan wanted to be a Princess, it was just which one... She decided that being warm was a factor, so she chose to be a Snow Princess instead of a Ballerina princess. I painted her nails red and she has been diva-ish ever since. We invited her little friend Kyla from school to join us at our Trunk or Treat. I think they had a good time.



Riley:

Riley had a hard time deciding what or who he was going to be. Last year we pretty much had to hog-tie him to get him to dress up, so this year was an improvement because he was willing, just undecided. He went back and forth between a cowboy or Buzz. He said, "what about a cowboy Buzz?" Um... I guess so.. but when we left he forgot his gun, so he was just Buzz.




Maddy:

Miss Madilyn was a little lion *duh* I tied a pink bow in her main so people would know she was a little girl :) We originally bought this costume for Riley when he was this little. She looked so darling, and she actually didn't mind keeping the head piece on... I think because it was SO DANG COLD!




C A N D Y T I M E!!!


Keagan sorted all of her candy, just like what I used to do when I was little. She was so busy sorting that she didn't really eat any last night. She actually got SO much candy that she needed two big ziplocs. I say she had a successful night!




Maddy didn't get any candy but that didn't stop her from eating some! She crawled over and picked up a sucker from Keagan's pile, and we didn't think anything of it, well... about 5 minutes later I realize she is sucking on that sucker and oh-so proud of herself for unwrapping it!




Riley's stash! He was so funny, we have to pick through it to find all the candies with nuts, and while we were doing that he was picking through Keagan's pile. I guess he thought that was fair.

Many of you have been asking about how the ol' ticker is doing, and I know I haven't posted about it in awhile, so here is the official, "out of Barb's mouth" update:

Let's start at the beginning, so you can follow along :)

Dec: had little Miss Maddy, joy of our lives, cutie pututie. Of course the "not feeling well" started a week before I had her.

Jan: They discover I have PPCM (Peripartum Cardiomyopathy- a swollen heart) They do an echo and show my ejection fraction rate at 20-25.

May: another echo shows improvement at 35-40. Yeah for improvement!

August: Traveled alot, didn't feel so great, EF rate dropped back to 30-35 (bummer) They tried to up the Lisinopril, but my blood pressure dropped too low :(

September: still not feeling well, no change in EF.

October: This month I have been feeling ok. Maintaing but not feeling great... frustrating actually. The Dr. and I have been talking about new meds. I hate the idea of new meds, the med that I am being put on makes me oh so sick... it's called COREG. They are hoping to see more improvement (we are all hoping). I will let you know.. you will probably see less of me and hear less of me when this happens, just because the side effects of this one are BRUTAL!

Regrets: I don't have any regrets about having my little girl, at the beginning though I did put off taking the meds because the thought that I couldn't have any more little ones and not being able to breast feed my last one was overwhelming, so I skipped out on the meds to feed Maddy just a few more weeks. Would those weeks made a difference? Not sure, but I know and my Dr. know that my EF rate isn't a great number right now.

Up next: I have another echo next week.

other thoughts: Never knew about this before I had it, and never knew how much it could change my life. I love my life... don't get me wrong. I just think I would have been able to run as Obama's Vice, if I were feeling a little better, I mean what does Sarah Palin think, she is the only women that would look good in a $150,000 dollar wardrobe. I could look dang good in that (wink, wink)

so hope that helps. and for the record let me just say: THANK YOU to my parents who have been oh-so supportive. To all my extended family who have helped us financially afford house keeping and other help. All those who have watched Riley because I didn't have the energy or brought in meals on the nights David had school, or for those of you who have just said a prayer in my behalf. I WILL beat this. I WILL have a healthy heart one day. I will. and right now i WILL get back to bed... gheesh, it's 1:48 in the morning!

There has got to be something wrong when you see snow on your pumpkins. two words: Global Warming! Just kidding, I just think it's funny that in October we are getting an inch or so. This morning when I went to start our car the doors were frozen shut. Hello Winter, I've missed you :) Guess I will be cleaning out the garage today. yippee!

Like every other Mormon house in America we carved pumpkins last night for FHE. We always have a good time planning and carving the pumpkins, and I love that the kids hate the :slime: I hated it too when I was younger. The pumpkins all turned out pretty cute. David's pumpkin he called B.Charon and then he turned it around and I found out why... It has a HUGE mouth. sad but true isn't it! That's ok... I will get him back soon enough. Enjoy the pics!