It was a difficult start for my son and me. From the beginning, he was a yowling, fussy infant who didn't relish being held or cuddled and protested LOUDLY when things weren't the way he wanted them. He was resistant to change almost from day one-- we fought trying to get him to breastfeed. He never would accept pacifiers. When it was time to ween to bottles, he fought us on what type of bottle he would take. When we introduced solid food, he balked at that as well. Seemingly ANY time we changed something or did something new, we knew to expect a battle from our firstborn.

Because of this rough start, mothering has not come easy for me. I didn't have that inseparable love-bond that so many mothers experience and enjoy when they spend the first weeks and months getting to know their sweet babies. This is not to say that I didn't or don't love my son; I do. It's just that he has been a trial in patience and long-suffering--to say the least. When he was born, I had visions of tucking him in and reading him stories, of fun park and museum visits, trips to the zoo or adventures around the city. What happened instead were meltdowns and tears, out-of-control screaming and angry protestations. We rarely left the house for the first four years of his life, because he was so out of control. In hindsight, I really should have mentioned these things to his pediatrician, but I didn't know what to expect back then-- I was an only child myself and didn't know what was "normal" for infants and toddlers.

I would see other mothers delight in their children and talk of the wonderful things they were learning and doing together. For me, mothering felt like I was in a long, dark, endless tunnel of which there was no end. The greatest pain came when other mothers would ask whether he was sitting up or crawling yet, whether he had said his first words, if he was feeding himself, whether he was potty-trained yet...like their child was. There were many days that I would get in the car and cry in frustration and bitter disappointment. My child wasn't like other children, and it seemed that no matter how hard I tried to get him to do what others were doing, it really came down to HIM being ready to do those things. It wasn't for me that he did things like learn to crawl or speak-- it was for himself.

I now have a rambunctious and opinionated five-year-old. He hasn't ceased being difficult and challenging-- the challenges just manifest in different ways now. He has mastered sitting up, crawling, walking, feeding himself, potty training, and talking; he just learned to do them on his own time. He is still hard to handle at times when we take him to new places, and while he is curious and asks many questions, he doesn't like school and we often hear that he has problems focusing. While the verbal face-to-face motherhood probing and comparing happens less frequently, the pain of comparisons still stings at times when I read of other mothers gloating online that, "...___ made the honor roll, again! ___ is so smart, just like us!"

It's not that I don't want other children to excel and do well, it's not that at all. It's the fact that all of our mother-hearts are so very fragile when it comes to our children. We want them to be strong, smart, and independent. We want for them to be brilliant, creative, intelligent, and kind. When you see your child falling short of those mother-wishes, it really hurts your heart, and your psyche. While I wholeheartedly advocate celebrating life and accomplishments made, I think we should tread carefully on the way we boast of achievements; not only our children's achievements, but also our own because we just never know who is hurting and struggling just to stay afloat in this game of parenthood and life. I feel we also need to be careful about how we compare our children (and ourselves!) to others, especially when we know so little about another family unit and what it took for an individual to get to this point in life.

In short, let's be kinder to each other. Let us celebrate the joy of living without inadvertently tearing someone down, or making them feel inferior because they haven't mastered something on the world's time table. I know the intention of most people when they brag on their kids isn't to hurt others-- but it can still sting when you have done and are doing all you can. If you are a parent that is struggling, don't despair! Never forget--you are amazing. Your children are amazing. The things we learn in a single day about the world around us is amazing. We never stop learning-- that in itself is phenomenal!

The next time you meet with another parent, leave the comparisons and the boasting out of the conversation. Learn through watching and listening! We have so much to teach each other, if only we would allow ourselves time to slow down and open our hearts and minds. Here's to learning, and meeting the goals we set for OURSELVES in life. I hope you and your children are successful with whatever you/they undertake. Just (please!) be gentle when you announce those accomplishments to the masses. :)
    

 I'm so proud of my little big man! He graduated from preschool in May and is now ready to begin his official school career in the fall. It's been the best move we could have made for our little guy who had constant ear infections since birth that limited his hearing and delayed his speaking skills. Once he got tubes put in and began going to Primrose Preschool, we have noticed him growing by leaps and bounds! The only downside (if there is one) is the fact that sometimes we can't get him to STOP speaking, haha!

 Peyton LOVED Mrs. Visor. So did Chloe. For that matter, we all did. I wish she could be Peyton's teacher for Kindergarten as well-- she's THAT good.

Really.



 Getting his diploma from Mrs. Aragon, the school owner. He looks pleased as punch!

It's funny to me that when Chloe was a baby, she could smile for pictures, no problem. Now we're lucky to get her to look at the camera or not make a goofy face if she does look at it! Ahhh well, three out of four isn't too bad!

Peyton's celebratory graduation cupcakes from Gigi's. He immediately nabbed the one with the flag on top since his whole program was patriotic. :)

Way to go, Peyton!! Here's to a lifetime of learning!

Bored? Can't think of something to read? Try this! 

My friend, Stephanie (on my left in this picture) had run a mud run the following year and was excited to try it again this year, too. After many e-mails back and forth, we finally assembled a team and came up with a plan of action. We all registered to run The Warrior Dash in East Texas in April and all carpooled the 1 hour+ drive up to the race site.
 It was quite a race, let me tell you! I had the torture pleasure of running with my personal trainer who cracked the whip encouraged me and kept me in line for the 3.2 mile trek through woods, over cargo nets, hills, balance beams, lake wading, mud running, barbed wire avoiding, as well as the flaming fire-y, mud-water/pit-crawling finish.

 At the end, you can look forward to things like free beer {if that's your thing} or crazy characters like this one that is wearing flesh-toned pants and a hot pink g-string complete with bunny tail!

All in all, I would totally do it again-- even though it took me a half hour to successfully wash out all the mud that had dried in unmentionable spots everywhere! :)

I coerced Troy into running a race called The Firefly Run benefiting The Children's Hospital in Dallas. The really cool part about this race is that it is run at night-- with everyone wearing light up accessories and/or costumes like these lovely ladies above.

It was also a 5k, but it had to be one of the most brutal races I've ever run with the exception of running 8 miles with my friend Ginger when it was 89 degrees out.

This was almost as bad-- I think it was something like 85 degrees when the race started, and that was at about 7:30. It was hot and humid, and disgusting to run in. I had to stop several times because I couldn't get air and it was pretty miserable for a while.

 In fact, when Troy and I met up (since he ran ahead) we both remarked how when we saw the 2 mile marker, we were completely devastated because we thought we were further than that. For those of you who don't run, an ideal running temp is around 65 degrees so that when you heat up, you're not roasting.

 Luckily, the end of the race entertainment made up for the miserable-ness of the race.

They have a step dance team that dances at the race each year, and they are phenomenal!! Their uniforms change color and turn on and off at different parts of the performance. They also have a costume contest, for which we didn't stay. We had payed a babysitter to come out and run, so we had to get back home! I think the only way I'd run this again is if I knew it would be much cooler at the start. Cool concept though!

The leprechauns must be in cahoots with the Easter bunny and that jolly old man, St. Nick, because they all figure out a way to get into our house for the sole purpose of surprising the kids and sometimes trashing the house in the process.

This bunny must enjoy the spring season thoroughly, because our floppy-eared friend left both of the kids their own bag of gardening soil, a planter, wildflower seeds and a mini watering can. There were also sweet treats and angry birds, bubble guns, and chap stick. 

 And I don't think the kids minded one bit.

We woke up one morning to a terrible mess all over the house! Sneaky leprechauns snuck in and tangled green yarn up and down the stairs, around tables, under chairs, over door knobs, and in and out of rooms.

 The yarn led to the laundry room, of all places, and surprised both kids with a pile of loot at the end of the trail. Both kiddos received a green shirt, a new movie with a green lead character (Shrek for Peyton and Tinkerbell for Chloe), as well as a green hair bow for the little lass and a hat-band for the little lad.

 Peyton was thrilled with his stash, and wanted to tell Chloe right away about what he found.

Once Peyton woke Chloe up, she was just as excited to find her goods and couldn't wait to wear her hair bow and watch her movie.

As the sun rose the morning of February 19th, hundreds of runners all wearing white shirts showed up at Fair Park near downtown Dallas to run a race of epic colorful proportions. I was so excited when I heard about this unique race that I took less than a week to think about doing it and then registered. I'm so glad I did, because it's becoming the single most sold out race across the country. As more people are hearing about it, it's becoming quite difficult to secure entry into the race in many different states!

This was about ten minutes before the race began. Everyone looks so pristine and fresh, but not for long!

Troy couldn't get into the race because he wasn't sure if he would be here to run it, and by the time we realized he could run it, registration was closed. He became my on-route photographer and captured some scenes as I was out running the race. As you can see from the picture above, you become quite colorful throughout the course of the race. The first color they tossed at us was yellow, followed by pink, purple, then green. Troy waited at the green station to catch me come by and also caught these two girls who were moving out according to him!

The race is only 3.2 miles long-- which, even if it's a stretch for you to run, is really not that exhausting because you are having so much FUN! Volunteers at each station toss cupfuls of colored corn starch at you that saturate your clothes with color. It's a fun transformation, and no two runners look the same at the end.

 Here I am making my way through the station and towards Troy. I had no idea that he was waiting on the course-- I thought he was waiting at the end! So it was a fun surprise to see him on the sidelines. In this picture, I haven't realized that he is waiting and taking pictures of me. :)

I showed Troy my colorful self a quick moment before turning the corner for the last portion of the race.

 Yippeee! This was the most fun I have had running EVER. Seriously, I smiled the whole time. Bring music along if you run it solo-- there's no music on the course, and it helps to pump you up!

 They have color celebrations at the finish line every 15 minutes. I was in the first wave, so I got to do the very first color burst! You can't see me, but I'm in there!

 The colors look super cool being shot into the sky, but they quickly mix into a giant brown cloud.

I know some people hate the commercialization of Valentine's Day, but I personally love all of the bright colors, sweet sentiments, heart-shaped everything, and special time carved out for the ones I love.

The kids love it, too. We always try to make a special breakfast and get the kids something that they would enjoy. One of their favorite things as you can probably tell from my posts are balloons! They get them for birthdays, Valentine's Day, and even St. Patrick's Day.


After Peyton went to school, Chloe went everywhere with her balloon. Here she is watching Mickey Mouse Clubhouse with her floating friend!

 I made some chocolate covered strawberries for after dinner. And speaking of dinner, it was pretty glorious.Troy and I made flat iron steaks with a wine reduction sauce, garlic mashed potatoes, and roasted asparagus-- yum, yum!

My sweetheart sent me flowers, too! Actually, this is the second arrangement because the first (the one pictured below) came with half of the lilies dead and withered. We cut out the patchy flowers but the florist sent this bouquet along, too. They are both so lovely!

Peyton signed this card to his dad all by himself! These kids really do adore their dad-- so for them the phrase, 'Greatest Dad on Earth' isn't far from the truth!