it's you i love, it's you.

Friday, October 23, 2009

if only i can be much stronger than i am. if only i wont think about all that's gone. if only i really can move on. if only emotions cease to exist. if only you were real.

misses.5:13 AM

Sunday, October 11, 2009

i've decided to carry on..

im gonna leave behind all emotions i still hold for you.

for i aint gonna be a silly girl..

goodbye-

misses.3:48 AM

Monday, September 07, 2009

after i find someone who can help me tomorrow, all these will be over.

cause i dont want to wish for fairy tales.

i dont want to survive on lies.

i dont want to listen to any excuses given.

i was so dead. i was picked up. i was brought down.

let me go. set me free.

you've got your freedom. now its my turn.

he'll help me. he'll.

save me. save me. save me.

i dont want to trust no more.

dont hurt me no more.

you will help me. you will.

thanks.

misses.4:33 AM

Sunday, September 06, 2009

its hard when you know your heart doesnt want it yet you have to force a smile.
its even harder when the one who claims to love you dont feel your pain.
what's left is your shadow following me,
and me blindly following you.
will your heart ever turn back to see that stranger behind me?
i dont know.
how long will it take for us to switch our roles?
sunset?
no, the lights on the streets blind me.
sunrise?
no, you're on the run.
perhaps, the answer lies within the soil. which is yet fertile.
it lacks the element.
my soul.

misses.8:02 AM

Saturday, August 22, 2009

prelims' ending in approx 3 days time.. gave econs a miss though.. i've really got no confidence in it. but no worries, im seeking help. i sure am cause i'm not giving it up yet. never.

A levels' in approx 80 days i suppose..im sure it's enough to make a very big difference. im definitely not scoring my As now.. but i'll make sure i will. i've confidence in myself..that i wont fail my loved ones (:

to think back and reflect on the past few months, i guess i've wasted too much time getting upset and all. it's true i lack confidence.. and i honestly wanted the support. but nontheless, everything's alright now.. and it'll like this for a very long while, right?

to dearest: it's gonna be tough. even tougher for you.. but i hope i'll see a better you after all these obstacles. it's hard to make that decision im sure. but no matter what, i'll support your decision. you dont have to worry about me. i'll fight on. even harder these months. you dont disappoint me too alright? it's good that you've a goal in mind (: you'll always score, and i believe in you.

misses.11:09 PM

Thursday, July 30, 2009

i really miss J1. i miss all the fun days we shared. all the camps. especially orientation two and orientation 09. and of course the times when im still a camper. orientation 08. i truly miss it. og8.. family three.. lovely times..

i miss all the overseas trips. when we all work together as a team. when we cried in each others' arms recalling the past..

i wish we can have the chance to be campers together again. and to run a camp as facilitators again. and to plan a camp together as a team. to travel new places and enjoy what the world have together. to be slos together, staying in a chalet together for a week visiting places and of course, to create the best team of all. to break records once again.. to have something new to miss as much again.. to share the love we have..

i miss the times..

misses.3:42 AM

Monday, June 15, 2009

no need to get excited over phone calls,
we both know the limit to our vocab.
no need to measure the distance between us,
we both know the counting never hesitate.
no need to think about loving,
we both know it hates to wait.
when all is said and done with,
love does not remain.

i'd cry those lonely nights,
those nights i hid under.
beneath the kicks i longed to hear,
a slight little muffle.
it never seemed to me,
that darling you were near,
the love i used to hear,
comes with nothing but a tear.

when he said he loved you so,
did you believe from head to toe?
when he hugged you tight and swear,
did you doubt that love he claim?
when he kissed and said forever,
was forever within your hands?

surrendered.
slaughtered.
murdered.

misses.8:27 AM