This whole damn web log. 

I thought "lemme look back and see how much turkey and ham and cheese i brought"

half pound each? full pound each? THE FUCK nothing. No mention (that I could find) reading through) 

guess i'll wing it with the amounts. 

was reminded of the leg cramping at night, gonna try and avoid that shit this time, somehow. Not sure how but we'll see. Maybe need to take it way easier on the pre-ride laps, aka don't try and ride everything just because, treat the effort like a race effort, if I gotta work to hard to pedal, fucking walk. Or something.

lights, still an issue, I purchased one but didn't get that outbound hangover but hopefully DR will still let me use it and that'll be probably good. Figure keep it off mostly, then bring chargy plug and external battery, rely on front lights mostly maybe since there are two and can be swapped and charged. That is assuming the bike doesn't explode.

BB is creaking today. Started off quiet then got louder and louder. Couldn't get the cups out at home some maybe it was just the spindle. Tried but failed, worked on the brake a little. Maybe I'll throw some pads in if it isn't better tomorrow. And the seat post slipped while riding. If that collar goes it could be a big problem. Don't have a spare one of those.

Maybe need to clean and load it with friction paste.

Sigh. At least the tires were good, probably can go lower on the pressure, Bike felt great, if loud, I felt pretty good, got done with our ride and felt fresh enough to go out again.

of course two shopping trips and working on the bike outside for a while and I'm more like i need to lie down. Post shower I did and it was great. 

Looking back what I did write down was how stressfull the weeks leading up to the race were. 

here's to holding it all together.

Have I beat the shit out of this bike? Doesn't seem to be but isn't perfect. We'll see I guess.

If it is loud and creaky and holds togehter? that'll be enough 

finished another book, started another reacher book, different, a little confusing in a way but fast paced and entertaining. if addictive. kind of just want to get through it all. 

but sleep and patience.

heddwch

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There's a lot in this short film. 

 Working all day on your feet isn't very restful but it is a different tired than riding for a couple hours, either on the road or in the woods.

But today? Sunday? Pulled the plug on dirt church, on everything. Got up at 4:30 to get the kid and E out the door and headed to boston for the regatta in the heat, went back to bed. And actually slept. Slept until after 9am!!!

Made coffee, and generally didn't do much. Got a few more episodes of Shoresy in, more coffee. Then headed to do the grocery shopping with the oldest. came home, at some food, and finished watching the first season. Damn is the show good.

Not sure what else. But I had planned on working on the bikes, putting in the rivnut, swapping the 3" tires for the 2.6" tires getting the spare chains sorted, maybe even swapping the dropper back to the short one (for less creaking). I fear though that some of the noise is from the bottom bracket. Bearings feel good and the spindle is re-greased but the BB itself might need to be taken back out. That's towards the bottom of the list. Ordered a 29+ cush core for the rear, it might not get here, it should be okay up there but is a nice re-assurance if the air drops or just for the general handling and lower pressure possible with it. Not for the front though. 

Half kind of thinking of trying to do the tire swap tomorrow morning and commute once again on the Stache. It isn't fast (as far from it in fact) but contact points yo. 

But even taking today pretty much totally off? I'm still tired. Have to get a handle on that I think. Seems to be important. 

Feeling more of a steely calm about the up coming race. I think last year I was pretty jacked/nervous/freaked...  realizing maybe i like the planning more than the racing or just full of doubts. Dunno, this feels just more deliberate, there's lots to do still, but more knowns, i know i can't just eat sandwiches, and some of the food I brought last year i didn't touch... like those fig newtons, just never felt the urge to eat them. A handful of other stuff too.

paused at this point last night, 

 more evocative i suppose, doesn't roll off the tongue quite as well.

I've ground myself down this week. With surprising ease. MTB on Sunday, commute MWF, W&F on the Stache. Tuesday worked on the stache all day then joined the smackdown on the Klein. 

Listened to a reacher book after Lab Girl and Scalzi's Kaiju book, listened to if fast, finished listening to it over 2x speed just to get through the end.

For a chance of pace I tried out a book that I'm not sure I can explain why I decided to read it, something must  have pushed it my way. 

And holyshit it is so good, on many levels, endurance sport, getting old...  all that...

 HUH? 

yeah that's the best way to describe me showing up at the TT compared to everyone, literally, everyone else there. It just does not get less aero of an over the road truck than that. Cue me. Same. Of all the 'road' bikes I have that one is the least. The crockett isn't much better but it is a little. Klein has a really high BB and I sit up in the air a bit more and in a move of idiocy I put some 46s on that bike. Maybe i'll get one of them fancy bikes...  maybe.

Of all the other rides there, Kipp was second place with his '04 C'dale but even that is WAY more aero (his wheels too) (and he's got a lower drag) although he did have a bit of heat stress and sat in the back of an ambulance for a while after.

So yeah as expected I faired pretty poorly. Couldn't get going very fast on the first section, kept getting slower until it turned up then stopped getting slower and kept pace pretty well up Reynolds with everyone that passed me but that's a little too late to recover from the first downhill aero demanding section.

And well as good of a night as it was, as nice as it was to ride out there and back with Graham, and to hang out with Marcus and Betty and to see Cronoman and Solobreak in the flesh. I'm in a shit mood, slept like crap, it has been a long week, I'm tired, and just, yeah I dunno. call it a funk or something.

Stache is still broken, I need to put a volume spacer in the top fuel shock, probably should take the pivots apart and re-locktite everything, 

And then there's everything else. literally, everything it seems. And yeah, one thing at a time, get through it and pretty soon in a couple weeks i'll be racing for 24hrs. Assuming i can find a few extra sliding dropout locknuts (proprietary of course, only avail from Trek).

And my dumb ass thought I could get away w/o eating breakfast and extending my fast till lunch. Feeling like a really fucking bad idea right now.

So yeah - I commented on Solobreak's strava that i wasn't going to write. And yeah, I probably shouldn't.

Go check the Nanoscape twitter and IG feed, there's cool shit I've been doing posted there. 

i'm going to make some coffee and hope that helps.

Amor Fati Motherfuckers

G

 That big old monster book.

And, it was worth getting through the struggling parts. It did come together quite beautifully. Left me with more of a feeling of peace than just about any other series I've read in a long time. And that's hard to say.

Went to fire up the Scalzi book that came in off the hold only to discover it is an eBook not an audio book. Guess I'll have to figure that out. 

Yesterday? Well yesterday is worth writing about but maybe Yesterday started off on Saturday.

Really solid DJ set too. And no- not sure if there are adds because i'm watching with them hidden... 

But there are adds on B Kerr's youtube stuff. the Morgins Epic was amazing, like just insanely cool. so many trails, so many different lifts all pretty much all by bike.

 My weight creep that is. Oof, Russ posted a trendline after eating a whole pizza last night and i decided to get on the scale for the first time in a very very very long time to see where i'm at.

Well...

 There was food made, the disparity between what the house is eating is pretty solid. At least I span the middle and wil make either and eat. Last night I made a batch of mac and cheese, tonight, coconut red curry with tofu and garbanzo beans over jasmine rice.

Made a bit too much perhaps, but i drained two bricks of tofu and well two cans of garbanzos and two cans of coconut milk seemed to be about the right ratio.

Guess I have lunches for a while.

Couldn't find anything to watch, there's another lack of overlap, my tastes and tolerance for films does not extend to period dramas and well, whatever isn't tense Sci-Fi or action. And since I was tired AF the dogs and I went up to bedroom early, turned the fan on louder to drown out the fireworks.

And I checked the you tubes...

And found this, and liked it enough to open this up on the tablet and pound out a few words to go with it.

it is below the fold

 I showed up. Worked my butt off. We did the long route with all the weird left hand turns. I got gapped on Carpenter, wasn't too far off after pine (def dropped tho) as expected, caught back up just in time to get pummeled on Hillside. The extra miles made me suffer a bit more. 

Rolled in and back. 

Was good. 

felt oddly okay. still not fast but also pretty okay as long as we weren't going up hill and well, what do you expect for someone as heavy as I am now.

No, i don't know. Haven't been on a scale in a long time. Fuck that, doesn't matter. Riding when I can, eating food, trying not to eat too much and trying to make sure I'm well fueled for the riding.

That's the ride report. We had well over 30 people show up, might have been over 40.

Oh and the A and B groups split after 152. I managed to make it up front at the light with Justice. We took off, got a monster gap. He sat up, I went for the state line sprint and won (uncontested) but hey a sprint win is a sprint win.

Right?

I had blocked off yesterday on my calendar. Hoping to find someone to ride all day with, someone who could push me or at least match the effort, but this lead to that and well, all I managed to do was take an extra 14 or so miles to ride in. 

With that 24hr race coming up I need a couple really long rides coming up. Need to do better at actually following through with the all day thing. 

June was better than April or May so at least there's that.

The knee? It really kind of sucks what I have to give up but I'm really really enjoying the return to pain free movement. I can actually kneel down and get out of a sitting on my heels squat without pushing up with my arms to take the load off the right knee.  I think the change in shoes (to the next size and a wide last) is also helping quite a bit.

It isn't perfect but it is definitely feeling much much better. But these new shoes have a pretty flexi sole and that's not helping, first time I can say "oh yeah so this is why people complain about small pedals on long rides" soft.

Oh he the TdF started today I guess.

No, I'm not gonna watch it. or follow it, except passively through unavoidable sharing of people's reactions on social media. Oh and I did a velogames thing, the G+ crew started it up for Giro so fuck it - why not. Picked names I recognized, I hope they all started, maybe half the squad is sidelined for covid.

Dunno.

Life goes on and I don't feel much like writing lately. Sorry.

Had some deep thoughts, put it on a poem but not sharing that shit.

I should really get a passport so i can leave this country if i have a chance/oportunity... 

Anyone wanna drag my ass around all day on the bike? Boston maybe?

Better eat lunch before it is time for the next appointment. 

And yeah, shit, I need to take some time off...  damnit.

heddwch
G